Author
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Topic: Let's Roast The Signs - Volume 2
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CosmiqPhuz Knowflake Posts: 474 From: Lititz, PA, USA Registered: Jan 2014
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posted January 10, 2016 03:46 PM
I haven't been posting as much lately, but I've been reading/observing a lot the past few months. You guys may remember a thread Gabby started called "Let's Roast The Signs". Well, let's go for another round!I'll start: Aries - You're a dick. Stop treating everything like a competition. If you're such a hot shot, why don't you go fight with your dad over who gets to bang your mom? Taurus - Get out of your comfort zone you gluttonous fat ass. You make a stupid face at the slightest sign of change/discomfort. Gemini - Just go ahead and drive yourself to the mental hospital. Or not, who knows what you're gonna do in the next 20 min? The terms "bipolar disorder" and "multiple personality disorder" are redundant - it's called Gemini. Cancer - I'm sorry that girl made fun of your shirt back in kindergarten, can we go back to the room and check on our baby you just gave birth to an hour ago? Leo - Can you 2 please hurry up and apologize to each other? The house is on fire and we need to get the f*ck outta here. Why did I have 2 Leo children? I'm an idiot... Virgo - So the only reason you're filing for divorce from your husband is because the wind blew his hair weird for a few seconds? What about the kids? And the dog? Libra - So you got plastic surgery on your face, breasts, and stomach? Who did you go to for your personality? Scorpio - If you would stop jacking off for a few minutes, maybe you'd remember that you have a job, a family, and bills to take care of... Sagittarius - I think I'm gonna let my friend with severe tourette syndrome give the best man speech instead. It's nothing personal, but your mouth is just a disaster. Capricorn - After betraying all your colleagues, severing ties with your friends, alienating your family, and going against all the basic principles of being a decent person, you finally got that promotion! Yea!!! If only, you could have gotten it sooner... Aquarius - Yes, it's ok to cry. Why is it ok? It's called sadness. It's a feeling you get when you experience pain and hurt emotionally. I mean, she was your mother after all... Pisces - Get off those train tracks! You're not helping anybody by getting run over. Just because you lost your bag of crack doesn't mean it's the end of the world! IP: Logged |
Dreaminess Knowflake Posts: 886 From: norway Registered: Aug 2014
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posted January 10, 2016 04:35 PM
"Libra - So you got plastic surgery on your face, breasts, and stomach? Who did you go to for your personality?" LOOOOOOOL
Oh man... that`s the second time here you have made me laugh out loud 😂 Good to see you back 👍 IP: Logged |
Violets Knowflake Posts: 5155 From: Registered: Apr 2011
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posted January 10, 2016 04:41 PM
Those were actually pretty funny. I'll not be adding any, but still hilarious.IP: Logged |
CosmiqPhuz Knowflake Posts: 474 From: Lititz, PA, USA Registered: Jan 2014
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posted January 10, 2016 04:55 PM
quote: Originally posted by Dreaminess: LOOOOOOOL Oh man... that`s the second time here you have made me laugh out loud 😂 Good to see you back 👍
Thanks Dreamibabe
quote: Originally posted by Violets: Those were actually pretty funny. I'll not be adding any, but still hilarious.
Aww, c'mon!!!!
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Desiring Shadows Knowflake Posts: 3288 From: UNITED STATES, BABY Registered: Jan 2012
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posted January 10, 2016 06:46 PM
Wow, you should be a writer! Marvelous work!! 😍IP: Logged |
hmm Knowflake Posts: 597 From: Registered: Dec 2010
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posted January 10, 2016 06:49 PM
HAHAHA. did you come up with these on your own?IP: Logged |
LittleBlackCat Knowflake Posts: 261 From: Registered: Jul 2014
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posted January 10, 2016 07:12 PM
Haaaa!! Libra and Cap were my favorite, truth always makes things funnier. The other awesome ones were Scorp/Sag and Pisces/Aqua XDIP: Logged |
Ami Anne Moderator Posts: 66148 From: Pluto/house next to NickiG Registered: Sep 2010
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posted January 10, 2016 09:39 PM
Missed you, CP! GREAT thread, as always ------------------ Want to Read Simple, Fun,Sexy Articles on Astrology? Check Me Out, DUDE. http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/
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CosmiqPhuz Knowflake Posts: 474 From: Lititz, PA, USA Registered: Jan 2014
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posted January 10, 2016 10:08 PM
quote: Originally posted by Desiring Shadows: Wow, you should be a writer! Marvelous work!! 😍
Thanks DS!
quote: Originally posted by hmm: HAHAHA. did you come up with these on your own?
Yea, I'm a little rusty though. C'mon, other people need to participate!
quote: Originally posted by LittleBlackCat: Haaaa!! Libra and Cap were my favorite, truth always makes things funnier. The other awesome ones were Scorp/Sag and Pisces/Aqua XD
Haha, glad you like them!
quote: Originally posted by Ami Anne: Missed you, CP! GREAT thread, as always
Missed you too, Ami! How's the guitar going?
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Ami Anne Moderator Posts: 66148 From: Pluto/house next to NickiG Registered: Sep 2010
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posted January 10, 2016 10:13 PM
@CP My teacher says I need a voice recorder to progress, so that is the next step. Timing is getting better.
Thanks for asking, CP! ------------------ Want to Read Simple, Fun,Sexy Articles on Astrology? Check Me Out, DUDE. http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/
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CosmiqPhuz Knowflake Posts: 474 From: Lititz, PA, USA Registered: Jan 2014
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posted January 10, 2016 10:33 PM
quote: Originally posted by Ami Anne: @CP My teacher says I need a voice recorder to progress, so that is the next step. Timing is getting better.
Thanks for asking, CP!
Yes, that's great, Ami! You gotta send me a video sometime. IP: Logged |
LaceyLeigh Knowflake Posts: 546 From: New Jersey Registered: Jul 2014
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posted January 10, 2016 10:44 PM
The Aries description is just... Awkward,IP: Logged |
CosmiqPhuz Knowflake Posts: 474 From: Lititz, PA, USA Registered: Jan 2014
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posted January 10, 2016 11:25 PM
quote: Originally posted by LaceyLeigh: The Aries description is just... Awkward,
That's the idea IP: Logged |
EmGem Knowflake Posts: 1038 From: Registered: Jan 2015
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posted January 11, 2016 02:58 AM
Aries: "you're a dick" bahahahaha 😂😂😂IP: Logged |
Ami Anne Moderator Posts: 66148 From: Pluto/house next to NickiG Registered: Sep 2010
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posted January 11, 2016 08:49 AM
I got an article I just did but I know I am gonna get ALLL kinds of flak if I put it on here ------------------ Want to Read Simple, Fun,Sexy Articles on Astrology? Check Me Out, DUDE. http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/
IP: Logged |
CosmiqPhuz Knowflake Posts: 474 From: Lititz, PA, USA Registered: Jan 2014
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posted January 11, 2016 09:32 AM
quote: Originally posted by EmGem: Aries: "you're a dick" bahahahaha 😂😂😂
Hahahaha
quote: Originally posted by Ami Anne: I got an article I just did but I know I am gonna get ALLL kinds of flak if I put it on here
Put it on here Ami! IP: Logged |
Faith Knowflake Posts: 15093 From: Bella's Hair Salon Registered: Jul 2011
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posted January 11, 2016 09:34 AM
Some of those really got me laughing...the Virgo one, especially edit...just don't have the heart... IP: Logged |
CosmiqPhuz Knowflake Posts: 474 From: Lititz, PA, USA Registered: Jan 2014
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posted January 11, 2016 10:25 AM
quote: Originally posted by Faith: Some of those really got me laughing...the Virgo one, especially edit...just don't have the heart...
I read your post before you edited it out. Well played, Faith. Much classier than I. IP: Logged |
Faith Knowflake Posts: 15093 From: Bella's Hair Salon Registered: Jul 2011
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posted January 11, 2016 10:47 AM
Thanks I wonder how many secret enemies I made with that, before I deleted. Oh well...the truth hurts... IP: Logged |
Ami Anne Moderator Posts: 66148 From: Pluto/house next to NickiG Registered: Sep 2010
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posted January 11, 2016 10:50 AM
OK CPThat did not take much urging ------------------ Want to Read Simple, Fun,Sexy Articles on Astrology? Check Me Out, DUDE. http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/
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Panthera Leo Knowflake Posts: 985 From: Registered: Jul 2013
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posted January 11, 2016 03:39 PM
They were all hilarious.You hit the mark with Aries,Gemini and Capricorn.IP: Logged |
Desiring Shadows Knowflake Posts: 3288 From: UNITED STATES, BABY Registered: Jan 2012
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posted January 11, 2016 03:52 PM
@panthera LeoYeah, Aries was a little weird though. Fighting to see who can bang his mom? Wtf ? 😂😂 lmao sooo weird!!! IP: Logged |
Ami Anne Moderator Posts: 66148 From: Pluto/house next to NickiG Registered: Sep 2010
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posted January 11, 2016 03:54 PM
quote: Originally posted by Panthera Leo: They were all hilarious.You hit the mark with Aries,Gemini and Capricorn.
Hi Buddy
------------------ Want to Read Simple, Fun,Sexy Articles on Astrology? Check Me Out, DUDE. http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/
IP: Logged |
Cappi112 Knowflake Posts: 483 From: New York, New York, USA Registered: May 2015
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posted January 11, 2016 03:59 PM
quote: Originally posted by CosmiqPhuz: I haven't been posting as much lately, but I've been reading/observing a lot the past few months. You guys may remember a thread Gabby started called "Let's Roast The Signs". Well, let's go for another round!I'll start: Aries - You're a dick. Stop treating everything like a competition. If you're such a hot shot, why don't you go fight with your dad over who gets to bang your mom? Taurus - Get out of your comfort zone you gluttonous fat ass. You make a stupid face at the slightest sign of change/discomfort. Gemini - Just go ahead and drive yourself to the mental hospital. Or not, who knows what you're gonna do in the next 20 min? The terms "bipolar disorder" and "multiple personality disorder" are redundant - it's called Gemini. Cancer - I'm sorry that girl made fun of your shirt back in kindergarten, can we go back to the room and check on our baby you just gave birth to an hour ago? Leo - Can you 2 please hurry up and apologize to each other? The house is on fire and we need to get the f*ck outta here. Why did I have 2 Leo children? I'm an idiot... Virgo - So the only reason you're filing for divorce from your husband is because the wind blew his hair weird for a few seconds? What about the kids? And the dog? Libra - So you got plastic surgery on your face, breasts, and stomach? Who did you go to for your personality? Scorpio - If you would stop jacking off for a few minutes, maybe you'd remember that you have a job, a family, and bills to take care of... Sagittarius - I think I'm gonna let my friend with severe tourette syndrome give the best man speech instead. It's nothing personal, but your mouth is just a disaster. Capricorn - After betraying all your colleagues, severing ties with your friends, alienating your family, and going against all the basic principles of being a decent person, you finally got that promotion! Yea!!! If only, you could have gotten it sooner... Aquarius - Yes, it's ok to cry. Why is it ok? It's called sadness. It's a feeling you get when you experience pain and hurt emotionally. I mean, she was your mother after all... Pisces - Get off those train tracks! You're not helping anybody by getting run over. Just because you lost your bag of crack doesn't mean it's the end of the world!
LOL!!!! Virgo was pretty perfect. My Virgo ex made me feel like he could break up with me if I was bloated that day. I'm still recovering!!!! Can I just say this ? I have never once met a Cap who trampled anyone. Most caps I know are more destructive to themselves (ourselves). Yes, I am a cap. But that's not why I say this. I just have YET to meet a cap that competitive or ruthless. IP: Logged |
Panthera Leo Knowflake Posts: 985 From: Registered: Jul 2013
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posted January 11, 2016 05:06 PM
@Desiring Shadows It was a little weird but I was laughing that hard I didn't think about it to much.It wasn't supposed to be serious and I'm sure Aries men and women are big boys and girls and won't be phased by it.If my perfect Virgo Moon can deal with it any one can.Although I forget that when I'm perfectly good I'm Perfectly good and true.When I am bad you should call an exorcist.Just thinking about that movie makes giggle I do hate constant swearing for no reason but Regan's potty mouth and the discomfort and shocked look of the priests faces was absolutely precious. IP: Logged |