posted January 11, 2016 06:35 PM            

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Originally posted by Desiring Shadows:
If you plan on giving up on him you should just ice him out at first to see his reaction and if he gives in

Or you can just tell him exactly what you are feeling.. Instead of telling us talk to him about it... You and him find a solution that works for you. Tell him he needs to compromise or it's not going to work out.

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I have thoght about this all night, and being 100% honest with myself I was happier when we split and I didn;t have to deal with these head games.

I am going to not see him again. I decided tonight. I just have to find the willpower to stick with it.

posted January 11, 2016 06:37 PM            

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Originally posted by Selenite:
I dunno, maybe it's just because his Moon is in Cap? My Virgo moon BF and I almost don't text at all, but it's not that he doesn't want to talk to me, it's that we already spend enough time together that we don't need to text when we're apart. So maybe after he sees you, he feels close enough to not have to message you 400 times a day. When my BF and I were separated physically, we texted more to stay close. So, to me, it would make sense for him to text you more the longer you are apart.
Is he aware that you perceive him as acting differently?

Edit: I also have quite an intense Scorpio Venus, and it was hard when we were separated, because I automatically interpreted his lack of obsessive texting as him being less into the relationship than me. But isn't it silly to measure the quality of your relationship with the quantity of text messages? And I know if he *was* that type to message me constantly, I'd definitely be turned off by it. It's just a compulsive Plutonic reaction that doesn't make any sense, really.

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Yeah, I know hat ou are saying. I guess it's just that it's not just quantity. It;s quality. They are cold and dismissive.

I am just so turned off by it.

I am starting to think that maybe rather than trying to force this guy to provide for my needs when he clearly doesn't want to...I might invest time better by finding someone who DOES want to.

posted January 11, 2016 06:40 PM            

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Originally posted by Dancing Maenad:
Hey Misspriss! Sorry to hear you're still having troubles with your Scorpio man. I think you got some really great advice here! I wish I'd be more detached to wise up some too, but right now I'm more or less in the same boat as you. lol

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I am sorry Dancing that you are in the same boat

I might be hurt and confused again, but I am also glad I gave him another chance. I set out clearly what I expected if I gave him another chance:

"And you won't go cold and weird?"
"No, I definitely won't"

And here we are.

He has not talked to me once today, and he has been online maybe 50 times talking to someone (at least for the past two hours solid that ISN'T me. So you know...this ia a huge problem

The guy is just a total jerk I think...but I ave him the benefit of the doubt one time too many now.

To be honest, this time I think he just lost my heart. I don't feel it anymore.

posted January 11, 2016 06:48 PM              

I am Scorpio female and I sort of resolved this with Scorpio Man recently.

However I found this very helpful. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0YZa9BHm1ik

There are 3 Issues
1. Marriage
2. Kids
3. Communication

I was also communicating with Scorpio Sun and he went cold for like 4 years and we are in quiet complicated situation. Thus I would be very happy to see even after 10 years as my feelings won't change. So this works for me. I must tell you that most of us Scorpios do not keep in touch, me even as a female.

The thing about see my actions is 100% true. If he is talking to you for 4 hours that's good sign. I hate when people say he is only for sex. I saw a great video that when you are vertical ask where are you in the commitment not afterwards. If he is in it for sex tell him YOU still need to know if it is and you would be fine with it however it doesn't sound like that.

He has fears and if he has been open enough to share with you. Reassure them !!!!

Also about getting married is a huge thing for Scorpions. Say Yes to him you would get married to him. We do not think that is a huge expectation unless someone make us realize that. Been there done that!
What he wants for commitment. It is all or nothing baby !
I was on the opposite side of table when I I put a huge expectation of marriage in the beginning and lost my soulmate.Your guy is traditional. He needs a structure to know where he puts you in what part or compartment of brain. More so because he is Cap Moon. Make some of your own traditions like small things we go to zoo or have Sunday brunch together. once a month / 2 months. He would appreciate that.

You can then convince him for 5 years time or 10 years time later but give enough practical reason and work for it with him. Reason is he needs to be able to dream with you that you are marriage material to begin with.

If you are afraid to give such commitment than you would have to make him vision what that looks like.

If you give him any other commitment it wouldn't work as it wouldn't been totality from your end.

Do not treat this as disease or issue where he needs therapy. That's ridiculous
Talk all about marriage with him and reassure him what happens if you did and also why you both would be good mother and him good father. After sometime not right away talk about practicality.He would soon realize he isn't ready for marriage.
However also make him aware that at some point he would have to take a gamble on somebody.

Second thing about whether he would like to commit to you and forget all his other women and that totality only he can answer and that would take him away when he gets scared of marriage stuff.

SO I recently told him how many times I want to be contacted and what are my limits and what aren't. For me I do need certain things done and until so I do not think I would like to do anything with him. I want a proper structure and your guy needs same.

Women is sexy when she says "What I want "
and Scorpio Men would love to deliver. He might even say I can't do this now and would go and do exactly what you have asked him to. He would work his ass off !

Scorpios go away ! When they don't have answers. They come back when they do!
It happens when anything makes your connection problem.

Problem : I don't have enough money
Solution : I would earn lot of money and come back.

then face limitation and say well I don't.

posted January 11, 2016 09:05 PM            

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Originally posted by bluestskies88:
that's the purpose why we get into rela - tionships.

the other is a mirror and show us what we need to become aware inside. that's intimacy.

yeah, would be nice if people would just do what we want them to do.. however, that's not reality. we cannot control others, nor can we expect them to do what we want them to do. it's always going to be a learning experience.

it looks like he's trying to open up... you have to be patient. (perhaps, this is another lesson he's teaching you)

didn't say you were nasty, but usually, when someone says your perspectives are dumb when one is trying to open up, that's hurtful. don't be surprised if he detach from you again....

just being real here and not being inconsiderate of your emotions. as i said, been there

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Alot of what bluestskies said is exactly the same things my Scorp Sun BF says to me. It's very wise and it's definitely not easy to do these things, but we should be aware and work towards it.

posted January 12, 2016 09:24 AM            

I have decided to just walk away 100% now.

I know people have communication issues and everything - but this is a new relationship. He's not earned my loyalty or trust or patience and I feel like I have gien too much already.

I am going to do as Elyssa said and ice him out for a while, or maybe just permanently.

posted January 12, 2016 10:00 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by misspriss:
I have thoght about this all night, and being 100% honest with myself I was happier when we split and I didn;t have to deal with these head games.

I am going to not see him again. I decided tonight. I just have to find the willpower to stick with it.

Out of interest...what benefit do I get from icing him out? What would it uncover for me do you think?

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posted January 12, 2016 10:02 AM            

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Originally posted by misspriss:
Thanks everyone.

I have decided to just walk away 100% now.

I know people have communication issues and everything - but this is a new relationship. He's not earned my loyalty or trust or patience and I feel like I have gien too much already.

I am going to do as Elyssa said and ice him out for a while, or maybe just permanently.

I can't see any other decent woman tolerating this behavior so I am not going to either.

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posted January 12, 2016 10:07 AM            

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Originally posted by misspriss:
Thanks everyone.

I have decided to just walk away 100% now.

I know people have communication issues and everything - but this is a new relationship. He's not earned my loyalty or trust or patience and I feel like I have gien too much already.

I am going to do as Elyssa said and ice him out for a while, or maybe just permanently.

I can't see any other decent woman tolerating this behavior so I am not going to either.

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I know it's going to be hard. God knows they can keep anyone hooked.

FWIW, I've only ever been with Scorps. Love/hate them so much. And this approach does shock/snap them out of their game-playing mode. So, for better or worse - you will have more clarity at the end of this tough patch.

If you allow yourself to want him as much as you do *on the inside* (like, allow yourself to doodle little love notes in your book - privately, or write a journal); the more you will be able to control yourself on the outside. I don't know if I'm making much sense, but what i mean is - pine for him as much as you want, but he doesn't need to know you pine for him.

Differs from person to person, but that ^ helps me control myself when I need to. Satisfies both sides of the love/hate coin.

posted January 12, 2016 10:11 AM            

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Originally posted by Desiring Shadows:
[QUOTE]Originally posted by misspriss:
[b]Thanks everyone.

I have decided to just walk away 100% now.

I know people have communication issues and everything - but this is a new relationship. He's not earned my loyalty or trust or patience and I feel like I have gien too much already.

I am going to do as Elyssa said and ice him out for a while, or maybe just permanently.

I can't see any other decent woman tolerating this behavior so I am not going to either.

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posted January 12, 2016 10:27 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Desiring Shadows:

Okay, if that's what you really feel.
Well , I'm terrible at this, but when u play a little hard to get it sometimes makes people want you more.. So before u go cold turkey, I was saying u could give him that treatment and let him realize how much he wants to be with you. But it's okay cuz there's 7 billion people in the world and maybe you are better off with someone who doesn't play these head games. It's immature of him, honestly

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I know what you're saying here, but:

1. He chased me for 8 months before we even had our first date. I could not ahve been any more hard to get.

2. I just broke up with him for two months. Then he right away does this.

I don't think it's about me not being hard to get enough, but more that when he DOES get he always does this.

I feel like he has problems that go beyond "Scorpio Male", you know?

posted January 12, 2016 10:29 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Desiring Shadows:
[QUOTE]Originally posted by misspriss:
[b]Thanks everyone.

I have decided to just walk away 100% now.

I know people have communication issues and everything - but this is a new relationship. He's not earned my loyalty or trust or patience and I feel like I have gien too much already.

I am going to do as Elyssa said and ice him out for a while, or maybe just permanently.

I can't see any other decent woman tolerating this behavior so I am not going to either.

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Maybe But you know...he was single for two years before dating me...so obviously not a lot of success with his tactics.

posted January 12, 2016 10:40 AM            

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Originally posted by Elysia:
I know it's going to be hard. God knows they can keep anyone hooked.

FWIW, I've only ever been with Scorps. Love/hate them so much. And this approach does shock/snap them out of their game-playing mode. So, for better or worse - you will have more clarity at the end of this tough patch.

If you allow yourself to want him as much as you do *on the inside* (like, allow yourself to doodle little love notes in your book - privately, or write a journal); the more you will be able to control yourself on the outside. I don't know if I'm making much sense, but what i mean is - pine for him as much as you want, but he doesn't need to know you pine for him.

Differs from person to person, but that ^ helps me control myself when I need to. Satisfies both sides of the love/hate coin.

In the meantime, keep posting here whenever you feel overwhelmed. We're here for you.

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Thanks you for being so supportive and understanding. It's helped so much, and sorry I keep spelling your name wrong! It's the name of a friend, so I keep doing it her way subconsciously.

I was with another Scorpio once when I was younger but he was different. Much more mature, honest, caring to others feelings.

This one is an idiot.

posted January 12, 2016 10:40 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by misspriss:
I know what you're saying here, but:

1. He chased me for 8 months before we even had our first date. I could not ahve been any more hard to get.

2. I just broke up with him for two months. Then he right away does this.

I don't think it's about me not being hard to get enough, but more that when he DOES get he always does this.

I feel like he has problems that go beyond "Scorpio Male", you know?

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posted January 12, 2016 10:42 AM            

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Originally posted by Elysia:
Oh right... Only wanting/chasing you when he can't have you.

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Yes, or when he has created enough distance - then he wants back in again.

Mind games.

posted January 12, 2016 10:46 AM            

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Originally posted by misspriss:
Thanks you for being so supportive and understanding. It's helped so much, and sorry I keep spelling your name wrong! It's the name of a friend, so I keep doing it her way subconsciously.

I was with another Scorpio once when I was younger but he was different. Much more mature, honest, caring to others feelings.

This one is an idiot.

Sorry to say that, but he has acted so hurtful to me and messed with my head and I am sick of it and ready to forget him now.

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Oh that's okay, what's in a name? Makes me feel good by proxy that you would subconsciously relate me to your friend.

posted January 12, 2016 11:15 AM            

Just concerned for my willpower.