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Author
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Topic: What are aspects that could cause you to dislike your parents?
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hypatia238
Moderator Posts: 5065
From: Colorado
Registered: Sep 2014
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posted October 29, 2016 07:23 PM
  
quote:
Originally posted by ChildofVenus:
I know I'm wrong for saying this but sometimes I wish they would go away for awhile. But my mom knows I love her I don't mind doing things with her. It's my dad that I have the biggest issue with.
I wouldn't say you are wrong, you are frustrated. Your instincts are telling you that you need your space and that is time for a change. Your dad is old school and having a hard time accepting you are grown up. How old are you? Over 21? IP: Logged |
ChildofVenus
Knowflake Posts: 1206
From: Customer Service Rep.
Registered: Apr 2015
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posted October 29, 2016 08:02 PM
I'll be 30 years old in April and yes I am frustrated. I still live at home so that's why it's so bad. But I'm planning to move once I finish school. I do work and I have my own money. I really don't think they will want me to move out and live on my own. Being as though I am the only child they worry about me. So I don't even know what they will say about me moving out. We were all talking the other day. And they were saying how they were going to get a bathroom added to my room etc. So I already know it will be a problem when I want to move.
quote:
Originally posted by hypatia238:
I wouldn't say you are wrong, you are frustrated. Your instincts are telling you that you need your space and that is time for a change. Your dad is old school and having a hard time accepting you are grown up. How old are you? Over 21?
IP: Logged |
hypatia238
Moderator Posts: 5065
From: Colorado
Registered: Sep 2014
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posted October 29, 2016 08:32 PM
quote:
Originally posted by ChildofVenus:
I'll be 30 years old in April and yes I am frustrated. I still live at home so that's why it's so bad. But I'm planning to move once I finish school. I do work and I have my own money. I really don't think they will want me to move out and live on my own. Being as though I am the only child they worry about me. So I don't even know what they will say about me moving out. We were all talking the other day. And they were saying how they were going to get a bathroom added to my room etc. So I already know it will be a problem when I want to move.
Fly away girl, it will be hard at first but they will adjust and keep their doors open to you always. I know how you feel. You want to leave but don't want to break their hearts, they make you feel like leaving will be the end of the world bc they love you so much and they always will, you leaving won't change that. It's the cycle of life, is hard for any parents who love their kids to let them fly away but you start feeling stuck if you stay for them bc is natural and part of life to fly away from the nest they created for you and create your own nest. They do get use it trust me, if you feel is time to go you should obey that instinct. When you leave call them weekly so they feel you are still part of their life, they are scared of losing you. IP: Logged |
Empty Spaces
Knowflake Posts: 1146
From:
Registered: Jun 2015
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posted October 29, 2016 09:12 PM
quote:
Originally posted by ChildofVenus:
I'm not surprised I have Saturn in the 4th house and I hate it.
My friend had that.She has a difficult relationship with her mother but she loves her anyway. IP: Logged |
ChildofVenus
Knowflake Posts: 1206
From: Customer Service Rep.
Registered: Apr 2015
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posted October 29, 2016 11:36 PM
I wouldn't mind staying if they weren't so controlling. I admit I would feel sad moving away from my mother.
quote:
Originally posted by hypatia238:
Fly away girl, it will be hard at first but they will adjust and keep their doors open to you always.I know how you feel. You want to leave but don't want to break their hearts, they make you feel like leaving will be the end of the world bc they love you so much and they always will, you leaving won't change that. It's the cycle of life, is hard for any parents who love their kids to let them fly away but you start feeling stuck if you stay for them bc is natural and part of life to fly away from the nest they created for you and create your own nest. They do get use it trust me, if you feel is time to go you should obey that instinct. When you leave call them weekly so they feel you are still part of their life, they are scared of losing you.
IP: Logged |
hypatia238
Moderator Posts: 5065
From: Colorado
Registered: Sep 2014
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posted October 29, 2016 11:49 PM
quote:
Originally posted by ChildofVenus:
I wouldn't mind staying if they weren't so controlling. I admit I would feel sad moving away from my mother.
Your dad is really old school huh and you feel you are reaching the point you have no choice but to leave? Have you told him this that he is pushing you away and making you seriously consider moving out? Maybe have a good talk with him first bf deciding to move out and give him a chance to repair and correct. Tell him you love him but that the controlling really has to stop. However, it might be good for you to be on your own for a while even if you end up moving back home later on. Maybe tell your mom that you just want to be on your own for a while find out what is like and figure out who you are on your own. You discover yourself more when you are not under the influence of a controlling parent is my experience bc you feel more free to explore your personality so to speak... IP: Logged |
ChildofVenus
Knowflake Posts: 1206
From: Customer Service Rep.
Registered: Apr 2015
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posted October 30, 2016 06:04 AM
I don't like having talks with my father. Every time we talk it turns into an argument. The last time we talked I was telling him that I wanted to go to Atlanta to see my family. And he went off on me telling me how I better tell him and my mom where I am going or I can't go. They are upset about me lying before which is why they said that. I'm planning to go back to LA after I visit my family in Atlanta. But I'm not telling them that because we will just argue and they will tell me I'm crazy for wanting to go. I've tried telling them so many times that I like traveling to LA but they give me a hard time. Being protective they take me to the airport. So they know where I am going when I leave home. I just wish something would give. Because I'm really starting to get sick of it.
quote:
Originally posted by hypatia238:
Your dad is really old school huh and you feel you are reaching the point you have no choice but to leave? Have you told him this that he is pushing you away and making you seriously consider moving out? Maybe have a good talk with him first bf deciding to move out and give him a chance to repair and correct. Tell him you love him but that the controlling really has to stop. However, it might be good for you to be on your own for a while even if you end up moving back home later on. Maybe tell your mom that you just want to be on your own for a while find out what is like and figure out who you are on your own. You discover yourself more when you are not under the influence of a controlling parent is my experience bc you feel more free to explore your personality so to speak...
IP: Logged |
ChildofVenus
Knowflake Posts: 1206
From: Customer Service Rep.
Registered: Apr 2015
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posted October 30, 2016 08:28 AM
My dad didn't like his father because of the way he treated my grandmother. He was physically abusive but my grandmother forgave him but my dad never did. I a lot of times he would have something to say because I would call and talk to my grandfather. I wish I would have had the chance to see him before he died. Now I really don't like father for some the same reasons he didn't like his. My dad isn't physically abusive but can be verbally abusive. So that's one reason why I don't like him. That and because he's a control freak. Also I don't like the way he treats my mother at times. Some of the things he says to her really made me mad. So that made things worse and I told my mother I didn't like it. But she tells me that her relationship with him. As nothing to do with my relationship with him. I know it's wrong and children are supposed to honor our parents. But sometimes I wish he would go away. IP: Logged |
hypatia238
Moderator Posts: 5065
From: Colorado
Registered: Sep 2014
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posted October 30, 2016 09:24 PM
I feel your pain and frustration girl, I hear you. I wish you the best figuring out how to proceed and assert your needs in the most positive way you are able to. I know you will get through this and find a way to achieve that balance and independence you seek. IP: Logged |
ChildofVenus
Knowflake Posts: 1206
From: Customer Service Rep.
Registered: Apr 2015
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posted November 02, 2016 02:38 AM
Thank you for taking out the time to reply I appreciate it.
quote:
Originally posted by hypatia238:
I feel your pain and frustration girl, I hear you. I wish you the best figuring out how to proceed and assert your needs in the most positive way you are able to. I know you will get through this and find a way to achieve that balance and independence you seek.
IP: Logged |
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