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Author
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Topic: Do You Think Life is So Freaking Hard it is Not funny?
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Ami Ann
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posted July 26, 2010 08:31 PM
 
I do IP: Logged |
Ami Ann
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posted July 26, 2010 08:37 PM
When I was a child, life seemed easy. There WAS good and bad, right and wrong.
What happened to that?
You KNEW the the path--intuitively.
Your heart could lead you as long as you could feel it.
Maybe, it is all that simple--still--but we can't get to it--any more.
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Winged Leo
Knowflake Posts: 307
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Registered: Jan 2010
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posted July 26, 2010 08:37 PM
Hi Ami,I think it's not, we're the ones making it difficult  IP: Logged |
AbsintheDragonfly
Moderator Posts: 1359
From: Gaia
Registered: Apr 2010
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posted July 26, 2010 08:38 PM
Sometimes. This song always helps me when I feel that way: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GUcXI2BIUOQ Maybe it will help you too. IP: Logged |
Ami Ann
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posted July 26, 2010 08:40 PM
Thanks for answering, Guys.
I had a moment of WHY did I write this?
I felt embarrassed and thought ,"Oh NO, I can't erase threads lol.
Thanks for being there!!!
PS I am listening , It is from "Hair". I LOVE that music. Ami
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teasel
Knowflake Posts: 2054
From: Ohio
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted July 26, 2010 08:45 PM
Sometimes. Most times, I'm aware of just how lucky I am. (There are others who have it much worse than I do, and who would laugh at what I think of as difficult.) I'm all too aware of the ways in which I've shot myself in the foot. You reminded me of a quote a friend shared yesterday: ”oddly enough, as you grow older, life should become more and more surprising. When I was a kid, I used to think adults had it all figured out. I had it backwards. Kids are the ones who have it all figured out. They’re just mistaken.” —Paul Graham IP: Logged |
Ami Ann
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posted July 26, 2010 08:47 PM
YES Teasel
You know what I want ?
My own self respect. Ami IP: Logged |
teasel
Knowflake Posts: 2054
From: Ohio
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted July 26, 2010 08:47 PM
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teasel
Knowflake Posts: 2054
From: Ohio
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted July 26, 2010 08:49 PM
quote:
YES Teasel
You know what I want ?
My own self respect.
Ami
Me too.  Sometimes I have it, sometimes I don't. IP: Logged |
Ami Ann
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posted July 26, 2010 08:50 PM
I have been agrophobic, too. I cling to my house like safety exists only there and BARELY there--too
When I go away I pant like a dog with water --to get back .
Then, I think--HOW am I gonna have a relationship being like THIS??
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Ami Ann
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posted July 26, 2010 08:55 PM
This is my New Years resolution--late.
I am NEVER gonna compare myself to anyone else.IP: Logged |
Ami Ann
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posted July 26, 2010 08:56 PM
I am gonna have to find a guy who is an agrophobic and we will order in  IP: Logged |
teasel
Knowflake Posts: 2054
From: Ohio
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted July 26, 2010 08:59 PM
 I was hesitant to get involved with anyone when I was that bad, because I didn't want to move from one dependence to another - making changes to adjust to a man - I wanted to do it for myself. (I was also afraid of attracting someone who wouldn't be good for me.) I have to go, but I do know what you mean. I didn't mean to minimize anything that you're experiencing. IP: Logged |
Ami Ann
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posted July 26, 2010 09:05 PM
You didn't minimize at all, Teasel!!!!
It helped to talk a lot!
Ami
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katatonic
Knowflake Posts: 5436
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Registered: Apr 2009
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posted July 26, 2010 09:09 PM
for days like these...more nina xxx
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h8tuTSi6Sck&feature=related IP: Logged |
LEXX
Moderator Posts: 3179
From: Still out looking for Schr�dinger's cat.........& LEXIGRAMMING... is my Passion!
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted July 26, 2010 09:40 PM
I try to and am usually optimistic and all, yet lo and behold out of nowhere new hardships come to slam me.
My thoughts are usually good and positive yet wham these things come, then I feel angry,bewildered too, like why? However still continue to think optimistically.
I see bad people having it good yet I have to struggle in so many ways.
Why?
I see people who have it all, great health and wealth, but they b!tch how miserable they are....and I know so many who have actually said they'd rather be dead than in my kind of shoes.
Life is hard and I did not/do not cause it to be so!
I have no idea why it is so and I keep thinking positively that it will get better, but at going on 56, well will it ever?
However I still go on hoping and trying my best to enjoy life as much as possible.
I am curious though what other folks think are the things making their lives hard are.
Maybe we should each make a list of the top 10 things which make it hard.
Then put an x next to the things we feel we did not cause or had/have no control over being, or were brought about by the way we were treated as impressionable children.
I seriously do not believe I "attracted" the bad things in my life.
I mean, come on, who the heck would wish for bad things to come to them? I wish and hope and dream of nice things/circumstances not bad things. I help others the best I can, even when it is hard for me to do so, be it physically or financially.
I do the best I can, but still bad things come at me.
Yes, good thing have and do come to me, and I feel blessed in many ways, but oh the bad stuff is bad.
------------------
Everyone is a teacher...
Everyone is a student...
Learning is eternal.
~Everyone is
gifted. Some simply open the package sooner~
}><}}(*>
.☆¨¯`♥ ¸.☆¨¯`♥ ¸.☆¨¯`♥IP: Logged |
teasel
Knowflake Posts: 2054
From: Ohio
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted July 26, 2010 10:24 PM
I edited out one of my responses as intended. I didn't post it because of the LOA - I posted it because I shot myself in the foot - I could have made the choice to try for something, and I let other things stop me.
I don't think you attracted the bad things either (I also said that above). I was talking about that with my mother, and how things always seemed to fall apart at the last minute. Money was to be put way for savings, and something happened to take the money away - that *always* happens, no matter how positive we are. That's just one example. Ami - glad you didn't think I was minimizing anything. I've felt the same way - that my intuition was stronger when I was younger (at least in terms of having some sort of path to follow). I feel sort of lost now, but am finally enjoying a good day (after not wanting to get out of bed this morning). Lexx: quote:
I do the best I can, but still bad things come at me.
Yes, good thing have and do come to me, and I feel blessed in many ways, but oh the bad stuff is bad.
You're one of those who could probably laugh at something I thought was difficult, which would be nothing to you in comparison to other things. I know you wouldn't laugh, though. IP: Logged |
LEXX
Moderator Posts: 3179
From: Still out looking for Schr�dinger's cat.........& LEXIGRAMMING... is my Passion!
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted July 26, 2010 11:00 PM
teasel quote:
You're one of those who could probably laugh at something I thought was difficult, which would be nothing to you in comparison to other things. I know you wouldn't laugh, though.
I would not laugh.
Suffering and hardship and or perceptions of them are relative to each person and even how they compare their lives to others.
I do get frustrated at folks who "seem" to have it all, all good, who still complain about things. However I also take into account how psychologically damaged they must be to feel miserable despite having it better than most folks. So I feel very sad for them. 
Like for example, a over 40 year old man or woman b!tching because they think they are no longer attractive and think they are fat...when they are not, just not 15 any longer.....but such folks can easily run marathons, and do cartwheels and have real waistlines others would love to have....
I feel sad for them because they cannot appreciate and feel blessed for being so fit after age 40.
And even more bewildering to me is such folks have griped to me about such things....
makes me feel very weird, like who do they think they are complaining to about such things? Very egocentric of them. Makes me wonder what they think of me?
I really all in all pity them.
If true hardship or disability were to slam them, could they survive it and go on, or would they kill themselves?:-(------------------
Everyone is a teacher...
Everyone is a student...
Learning is eternal.
~Everyone is
gifted. Some simply open the package sooner~
}><}}(*>
.☆¨¯`♥ ¸.☆¨¯`♥ ¸.☆¨¯`♥ IP: Logged |
GypseeWind
Moderator Posts: 4124
From: Dayton,Ohio USA
Registered: May 2009
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posted July 27, 2010 03:18 AM
Dear Ami;
Gosh I could write you a book on your one question, but I'll spare you.In true Sag fashion, I'll tell you a story instead. A friend of mine, that I met in 9th grade, which was way over 20 years ago, is a major pack rat, and saved every single note I (or anyone close to her ever wrote). One night we had a little party, and we got the notes out of the attic, and read them.
I was certain that it wasn't MEEEE that wrote how desperate I was about, whatever, and how I wished I was dead, over whatever. And of course they were mostly trivial teenaged angsty things.... NOT that I had a great childhood, I surely DID NOT, but I won't get into that here. Point is, AT THE TIME THAT I WROTE THAT, I REALLY DID FEEL THAT WAY, and probably nobody could of convinced me otherwise. Sooo, sometimes, I read my journals from ten, or fifteen, or one year ago, and still... always the angst, always the wistful yearning for something else, anything, but this... AND I REALLY MEANT IT WHEN I WROTE IT. Now I look back at all those seemingly horrific problems and see that for the most part, it was the huge magnifying glass I had on them, that made them so much worse. It wasn't until I truly figured out how to look outward, and reach outward, that I found what I feel is at least some semblance of peace. And no, I haven't been through the same traumas that you have, God Bless your strength, but I have been through my own, that maybe you would deem horrific. Only thing I can tell you is, cherish this day, these ARE the times of your life, and someday, I hope and believe, you will see that they really are. Because each moment on this Earth is so fleeting, and so graceful, even in its failings, that no matter what happens, they serve a purpose to our higher learning, and they are so very precious. Sending you love, Ami, hope you get it, wherever you live. IP: Logged |
Ami Ann
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posted July 27, 2010 06:02 AM
Thank you Winged Leo, Ab,Teasel,Kat, Lexx and Gypsee.I don't feel so alone.
I woke up and felt EMBARRASSED for writing this thread and said "Why doesn't this site have mechanisms to erase whole threads like my other Board does ?
AmiIP: Logged |
Yin
Knowflake Posts: 1933
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted July 27, 2010 08:12 AM
Sometimes.
I went through some horrible stuff as a teenager - a lot of death around me - people who weren't supposed to go. It changed me completely. What keeps me going? George Eliot said it best:
quote:
If you sit down at set of sun
And count the acts that you have done,
And, counting, find
One self-denying deed, one word
That eased the heart of him who heard,
One glance most kind
That fell like sunshine where it went --
Then you may count that day well spent.But if, through all the livelong day,
You've cheered no heart, by yea or nay --
If, through it all
You've nothing done that you can trace
That brought the sunshine to one face--
No act most small
That helped some soul and nothing cost --
Then count that day as worse than lost.
Gypsee, how can anyone not love YOU? IP: Logged |
LEXX
Moderator Posts: 3179
From: Still out looking for Schr�dinger's cat.........& LEXIGRAMMING... is my Passion!
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted July 27, 2010 09:22 AM
Even examining details of several of my past lives, I have not found any clues as to my misfortunes in my current incarnations.
A few possible reasons for certain interests/aversions/motivations, but not much beyond that.------------------
Everyone is a teacher...
Everyone is a student...
Learning is eternal.
~Everyone is
gifted. Some simply open the package sooner~
}><}}(*>
.☆¨¯`♥ ¸.☆¨¯`♥ ¸.☆¨¯`♥ IP: Logged |
Ami Ann
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posted July 27, 2010 10:14 AM
(((Yin))) (((LEXX)))) IP: Logged |
Nephthys
Knowflake Posts: 941
From: California
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted July 27, 2010 10:17 PM
I realized something tonight.........that no one can ever know anyone else's pain. No one can know how my life feels from my view, from my perspective, from my life experiences. I am so good at hiding my broken heart right now that no one in my life even knows about it, no one even knows that I am carrying this heavy pain around with me. I can only post it publicly here b/c most of you don't even know me in real life. IP: Logged |
Yin
Knowflake Posts: 1933
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted July 27, 2010 10:18 PM
Nephthys, I am so sorry.
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Lindaland
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