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Author
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Topic: feeling depressed; need some support
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RegardesPlatero
Moderator Posts: 4367
From: Storybrooke, Mr. Gold's Shop
Registered: Sep 2011
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posted October 04, 2012 05:26 AM
  
I'm really frustrated because I feel like no matter what I do, I just cannot get ahead in life. I cannot succeed at anything no matter what I do. Any advice on how to fix this, now? IP: Logged |
Ami Anne
Moderator Posts: 37501
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted October 04, 2012 07:53 AM
I will tell you what my answer is coming out to be. It seems so trite and I would have thought it was trite if I had not walked through it. It is all about self value. Without self value, you can have the world and it will mean nothing. Look at Princess Di, Micheal Jackson or Bill Clinton. With self value, a small amount means everything.------------------
Passion, Lust, Desire. Check out my journal
http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/
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RegardesPlatero
Moderator Posts: 4367
From: Storybrooke, Mr. Gold's Shop
Registered: Sep 2011
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posted October 04, 2012 08:00 AM
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C1ND3R
Knowflake Posts: 1343
From: Dorsia
Registered: Aug 2012
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posted October 04, 2012 08:07 AM
Astrology would help in this.. Would you post your chart?IP: Logged |
RegardesPlatero
Moderator Posts: 4367
From: Storybrooke, Mr. Gold's Shop
Registered: Sep 2011
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posted October 04, 2012 08:14 AM
I don't want to post my entire chart and give out too much personal info.Any specific position that would be helpful to know? IP: Logged |
YoursTrulyAlways
Knowflake Posts: 4060
From:
Registered: Oct 2011
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posted October 04, 2012 08:27 AM
I would like to give advice but in doing so, I will speak my mind the way I know how. Before I do so, I must be allowed to speak freely without any concern about being offensive or without having to thread lightly. I can be brutally frank and at times I can come off as harsh and abrasive, whether intended or not. So, unless you provide such assurances, I shall remain silent.IP: Logged |
RegardesPlatero
Moderator Posts: 4367
From: Storybrooke, Mr. Gold's Shop
Registered: Sep 2011
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posted October 04, 2012 08:41 AM
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C1ND3R
Knowflake Posts: 1343
From: Dorsia
Registered: Aug 2012
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posted October 04, 2012 09:12 AM
Your esteem is shot, my friend... My advice would be to incorporate a gym membership into your life if it isn't already. IP: Logged |
RegardesPlatero
Moderator Posts: 4367
From: Storybrooke, Mr. Gold's Shop
Registered: Sep 2011
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posted October 04, 2012 09:36 AM
I exercise at home, so I've got that part covered. (Don't want to pay for the membership or costs of transportation). IP: Logged |
C1ND3R
Knowflake Posts: 1343
From: Dorsia
Registered: Aug 2012
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posted October 04, 2012 09:45 AM
Depending on where you live or even the gym, a gym membership is about more than that.. If you're as social as you seem, you'd be in an ideal environment to be in contact with people that like RESULTS and you may find better luck seeing results from meeting someone and networking while working out than anywhere else.IP: Logged |
YoursTrulyAlways
Knowflake Posts: 4060
From:
Registered: Oct 2011
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posted October 04, 2012 09:48 AM
Patero,No. Don't sell me short. It's not about effort. I know that you try hard. From my perspective, it's more a matter of mentality. I have 400 connections on my Linked In. Even if I invited you to my Linked In and gave you full access to my entire professional network, you wouldn't accept it. I fully respect your confidentiality, but my own personal sense is that your guarded reservation may be holding back your networking. IP: Logged |
C1ND3R
Knowflake Posts: 1343
From: Dorsia
Registered: Aug 2012
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posted October 04, 2012 09:52 AM
quote:
Originally posted by RegardesPlatero:
I exercise at home, so I've got that part covered. (Don't want to pay for the membership or costs of transportation).
Consider it an investment. Check out the crowd.. For example, i know more bodybuilders go to Crunch & Gold's Gym than maybe Equinox.. I know more "white collar"-type people go to Equinox.. You'll find a much more average crowd at an LA Fitness or 24hr fitness, for example.. So, your role is to make a decision as to what type of people you'd like to surround yourself with.. Will you have a higher chance of success at finding one who can maybe get things rolling for you in your basement (other than yourself- something important to keep in mind) or will you find someone with the right connections elsewhere? What type of connections would u want? I had membership at a sports club la and i met quite a few people there.. Before i worked out there, i tried a glossy la fitness and nothing.. That was just strictly working out and nothing else. Which one do you think brought me better connections? IP: Logged |
Faith
Knowflake Posts: 2371
From:
Registered: Jul 2011
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posted October 04, 2012 09:55 AM
Well, you've got us! (HUG!)And you do have a job, and you do have friends. And you do have Pluto squaring your sun, more or less, and Uranus opposing it, and it's going to just be hard. One thing I would like to console you with is this, you can't learn to console yourself without having to suffer. It might just be that time for you. A few years ago I lost a cherished friend in a crazy misunderstanding, and it was like a knife through the heart. Over the months I HAD to learn how to cope with that pain, there was no choice. Finally, I came back to peace. Strangely...thanks to that experience, I don't worry about losing people so much anymore. I can love people, I can be brave enough to make new friends, and I am okay with letting them go. I don't hold onto people the way I used to, I don't worry about it as much. Through suffering I was able to realize that I am resilient. If people reject me...I will still be fine, I will still have peace. I'm just tossing out this idea that maybe it's your time to learn just how strong you are, too. If you feel that it doesn't fit your situation, by all means, ignore this post. 
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YoursTrulyAlways
Knowflake Posts: 4060
From:
Registered: Oct 2011
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posted October 04, 2012 10:40 AM
It is not easy to have self confidence when your self esteem is in the gutter. Your personal confidence is shown by the way you carry yourself. That is called social energy. You can't radiate such social energy unless you believe in yourself, and your attempts to connect with others would be less effective. Removal of your self doubt helps. More importantly, my recommendation is for you to shed some of that veil of secrecy you have and your guarded reservation about others. Unless you reveal a small portion of yourself, you would never be effective in letting others into your life. Those connections create opportunities for success.IP: Logged |
hippichick
Moderator Posts: 1844
From:
Registered: May 2009
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posted October 04, 2012 10:44 AM
I will have to agree with the astrology thing here.My life is full of hurdles, I have 3, very tight fixed tsquares that just wont let me be. Not to mention they involve Uranus so my life is always changing. The Universe, God, Goddess, Source, whatever higher intelligence is out there, supports you, Regards, and I have to believe our troubles are not for nothing. I LOVE my messed up life, cause it is MY life and nobody else's. I absolutely know that I would have not chosen, been given, whatever, this life IF I were not able to handle it. You can too. You have alot of support from us here, take each and every one of our stories, our energies and know that you are loved. And know that each and every experience you will take with you, energetically, back to source for healing.... blessins~ terri~ IP: Logged |
C1ND3R
Knowflake Posts: 1343
From: Dorsia
Registered: Aug 2012
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posted October 04, 2012 10:47 AM
quote:
Originally posted by YoursTrulyAlways:
It is not easy to have self confidence when your self esteem is in the gutter. Your personal confidence is shown by the way you carry yourself. That is called social energy. You can't radiate such social energy unless you believe in yourself, and your attempts to connect with others would be less effective. Removal of your self doubt helps. More importantly, my recommendation is for you to shed some of that veil of secrecy you have and your guarded reservation about others. Unless you reveal a small portion of yourself, you would never be effective in letting others into your life. Those connections create opportunities for success.
That "shell" may be blocking good things as well..
If you have any crystals for "protection" Reg, i'd toss those, too.. I've found people that play with crystals unknowingly play with a double edged sword.
IP: Logged |
Ami Anne
Moderator Posts: 37501
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted October 04, 2012 11:12 AM
C1ND
It is not about exercising, Sweetie. Lots of totally gorgeous, "toned" people are depressed.------------------
Passion, Lust, Desire. Check out my journal
http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/
IP: Logged |
Padre35
Knowflake Posts: 515
From: charlotte, NC, US
Registered: Jul 2012
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posted October 04, 2012 11:13 AM
Well RP, if I may suggest perhaps one is coming at things in the improper manner?Have you read "How to win friends and influence people"? What I've found is "raw" networking, where things are blatantly obvious, does not work well b/c the situation is a bit to much of a "you need something from me" one way street. IP: Logged |
RegardesPlatero
Moderator Posts: 4367
From: Storybrooke, Mr. Gold's Shop
Registered: Sep 2011
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posted October 04, 2012 01:05 PM
just wanted to say that I'm still reading through and absorbing things and thinking about themthank you all for responding IP: Logged |
Lazyscarecrow
Knowflake Posts: 840
From: Silent Hill
Registered: Aug 2011
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posted October 04, 2012 01:07 PM
Everyone is giving good advice. I hope I can help in some way too, or at least send you positive vibes with this post.But anyways, beating yourself up isn't helping.  It's no wonder you feel like this, aside from things not turning out well which is completely understandable. And I am all too familiar with the feeling of damned if you do, damned if you don't. But to save yourself at least a teeny tiny piece of mind with all that's going on, try not to tear yourself and/or your self-esteem to pieces. As hard as it sounds and is, try not to dwell on how you feel like a loser, not a good friend, etc. Don't be so hard on yourself, RP. You're great at what you do, you're great at something at least. Every one is. To say that you have no value is a load of bs, sorry to be blunt but I disagree. It's the first step towards loving and embracing oneself by acknowledging imperfections or hard times, and then maybe wondering if those imperfections are just blown out of proportion by your own perception. I believe people see you in better light than you think.
As for work, I will stop here because I am not sure what to tell you. Usually there are opportunities that pop up especially when we are at our lowest. Here's to hoping that your situation turns around, at least. Good luck. IP: Logged |
RegardesPlatero
Moderator Posts: 4367
From: Storybrooke, Mr. Gold's Shop
Registered: Sep 2011
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posted October 04, 2012 01:07 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Padre35:
Well RP, if I may suggest perhaps one is coming at things in the improper manner?Have you read "How to win friends and influence people"? What I've found is "raw" networking, where things are blatantly obvious, does not work well b/c the situation is a bit to much of a "you need something from me" one way street.
I've tried more subtle things. I've tried being direct. I don't really know what else to try, really. Maybe I don't have any value for people to see, and maybe that's the problem. Maybe the problem is that they aren't seeing it--maybe it's that it's just not there.
IP: Logged |
RegardesPlatero
Moderator Posts: 4367
From: Storybrooke, Mr. Gold's Shop
Registered: Sep 2011
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posted October 04, 2012 01:09 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Ami Anne:
C1ND
It is not about exercising, Sweetie. Lots of totally gorgeous, "toned" people are depressed.
well, to my understanding, exercise releases endorphins--I think that's what she was getting at, as a physical way to feel better, if not change anything else; that's how I took it and you are right, too--plenty of people way better looking than me are depressed IP: Logged |
RegardesPlatero
Moderator Posts: 4367
From: Storybrooke, Mr. Gold's Shop
Registered: Sep 2011
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posted October 04, 2012 01:12 PM
quote:
Originally posted by YoursTrulyAlways:
It is not easy to have self confidence when your self esteem is in the gutter. Your personal confidence is shown by the way you carry yourself. That is called social energy. You can't radiate such social energy unless you believe in yourself, and your attempts to connect with others would be less effective. Removal of your self doubt helps. More importantly, my recommendation is for you to shed some of that veil of secrecy you have and your guarded reservation about others. Unless you reveal a small portion of yourself, you would never be effective in letting others into your life. Those connections create opportunities for success.
thanks IP: Logged |
RegardesPlatero
Moderator Posts: 4367
From: Storybrooke, Mr. Gold's Shop
Registered: Sep 2011
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posted October 04, 2012 01:13 PM
quote:
Originally posted by C1ND3R:
That "shell" may be blocking good things as well..If you have any crystals for "protection" Reg, i'd toss those, too.. I've found people that play with crystals unknowingly play with a double edged sword.
I don't use crystals, tarot, or any form of divination; even my interest in astrology is limited to personality analysis/synastry, and I don't go into fortune telling. Don't do numerology or runes, either. IP: Logged |
RegardesPlatero
Moderator Posts: 4367
From: Storybrooke, Mr. Gold's Shop
Registered: Sep 2011
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posted October 04, 2012 01:14 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Faith:
Well, you've got us! (HUG!)And you do have a job, and you do have friends. And you do have Pluto squaring your sun, more or less, and Uranus opposing it, and it's going to just be hard. One thing I would like to console you with is this, you can't learn to console yourself without having to suffer. It might just be that time for you. A few years ago I lost a cherished friend in a crazy misunderstanding, and it was like a knife through the heart. Over the months I HAD to learn how to cope with that pain, there was no choice. Finally, I came back to peace. Strangely...thanks to that experience, I don't worry about losing people so much anymore. I can love people, I can be brave enough to make new friends, and I am okay with letting them go. I don't hold onto people the way I used to, I don't worry about it as much. Through suffering I was able to realize that I am resilient. If people reject me...I will still be fine, I will still have peace. I'm just tossing out this idea that maybe it's your time to learn just how strong you are, too. If you feel that it doesn't fit your situation, by all means, ignore this post.
thanks, Faith IP: Logged |
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