posted September 19, 2013 01:16 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by PixieJane:
Generally speaking, kids are not mature today.

To be clear by maturity I mean the ability to take care of one's self (not limited to waking up when your clock goes off but everything adults do, like put a roof over their head and advance in the world), and that especially means impulse control and accountability. I'm thinking of like a 14-year-old who was a voting member of a mining town who put a roof over his own head and took care of business on his own (chores, cooking, etc, all of which was harder back then) and teenagers who were decorated officers in their nation's military. In the ancient world many teens composed the majority of the army and raiders (at least in the field) and that sometimes included women.

---

First off, let me just say that I agree with this segment completely and secondly, and this pertains more to the bolded aspect of this post; You will be hard pressed to know that teens in some nations during this day and age serve with the militaries of some nation with great pride.

Me and my brothers did. Before moving here to Canada, me and my brothers were citizens of a Middle Eastern nation (which for the time being will not be named for security purposes) and all of us served with the military for a period of 2 years when we reached the age of 16. Mind you, it was mandatory service, and when I entered service, it was an active time for Al-Qaida and terrorist bombings were becoming common occurrences. And as a response, so were military raids on Terror Cells and networks. I personally served for a period of 2 and half years as a specialist and the amount of action we saw during those years can easily equate to three tours of duty by an active duty Marine today.

Afterwards (being disenfranchised from the Social and Political aspect of that particular Middle Eastern nation; Disgusting to say the least) our family moved to Europe during which time me and my brothers (who now were influenced to be self sustaining and independent; Partly due to having very independent minded parents and partly due to the experience we accumulated with our time in the Military) decided to apply for post secondary opportunities here in Canada (I was 19 at the time.) And the rest, as they say, is history .

We pretty much made our own lives here in Canada. In a period of 4-5 years, we got jobs, we studied and worked our ***** off, Got settled in good fulfilling careers, we fell in love with this nation, became citizens, got our houses, fell in love with wonderful women and now at the age of 29, I can say that we have earned our keep with a strong financial backbone, worldly experiences and fulfilling love lives.

posted September 19, 2013 02:31 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Kerosene:
I don't think it's strange for guys to find 15 year olds attractive, that's just how it is....

but Seriously , have you seen 15 year old these days, they look like 9 year olds now.. I remember when I was in 12th grade I took the school bus home one time and sat with these freshman and they looked and behaved like children... or maybe they were middle schoolers..?

Anyways human age expectancy is increasing and so we are aging slower.
It's just evolution.. deal with it.

---

posted September 19, 2013 03:07 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Kerosene:
Anyways human age expectancy is increasing and so we are aging slower.
It's just evolution.. deal with it.

---

And that is precisely why the attitudes towards younger women in their teens having relationships with older men have changed. With women living longer and now having equal opportunities as their male peers towards financial stability and personal independence, the opportunity of landing a long term successful relationship will arrive in due time and they don’t have to hurry up and get married since they don’t have to worry about dying in their 40s or 50s anymore.

posted September 19, 2013 07:36 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by PixieJane:
Generally speaking, kids are not mature today.

To be clear by maturity I mean the ability to take care of one's self (not limited to waking up when your clock goes off but everything adults do, like put a roof over their head and advance in the world), and that especially means impulse control and accountability. I'm thinking of like a 14-year-old who was a voting member of a mining town who put a roof over his own head and took care of business on his own (chores, cooking, etc, all of which was harder back then) and teenagers who were decorated officers in their nation's military. In the ancient world many teens composed the majority of the army and raiders (at least in the field) and that sometimes included women.

And just to be absolutely clear in case anyone has a different understand I will add that maturity does NOT mean either mindless obedience (and following the simple rules any 10-year-old can) or knee jerk (just as mindless) rebellion, having sex or dressing provocative, outgrowing fart jokes, or knowing things that the adults try to keep kids from finding out.

But how can kids be mature today? Their lives are too carefully structured with too little expected of them (and thus taken care of more than just making sure they take care of themselves) so they don't have a chance to mature. Keep a person in that environment until they're 40 and they'd be just as immature because maturity is something the brain develops as it practices it over years, not something that magically happens at an arbitrary age.

I've seen it among kids forced to take care of themselves on the streets or the sad ones forced to be the adult for their dysfunctional parents, but they learn to take care of themselves (and gain a lot of common sense) in a way many of their peers would never dream. And that's even more true of many who aren't sent to school and interact with adults much like an adult rather than with almost strictly their own peers (adults with authority over them don't count, or shouldn't). My homeschooling and unschooling group usually hated it when kids from public school joined us because they couldn't focus, tended to hold academics in contempt (though most were there for extra credit, that is to pass their class), and got bored way too easy.

Another example is a girl I knew who was homeschooled and was unusually mature as a result (not because of what home schooling did for her, but because she was spared what public and private schooling does, which is put kids in a bubble that prevents them from growing up) and after her mom moved she was put into a public school where she was shocked that she even had to ask permission to go to the bathroom (and it could be denied!). She knit as a hobby but the parent of one of the kids in her pre-calculus class called to complain saying she feared for the safety of other kids and the zero tolerance policy got her, though the principal was understanding and said if that was the least thing she ever got in trouble for then congratulations. However, within a month she sympathize with the school being run like a prison because the kids were extremely immature and she didn't even trust them with pencils and scissors (both for being idiots without any common sense and for lacking impulse control). However, the school being so controlling (with the helicopter parents like the one who reported her for having knitting needles at school) were why the kids needed to be treated as potentially dangerous morons because they were never allowed to develop enough maturity and common sense that kids generations ago (or those raised outside that environment today) would've.

In contrast kids in my hometown back when my granny was a kid sometimes carried guns to school (wild dogs and hogs) and no one thought anything of it. Many were expected to do the chores without being told to and did and that helped create maturity (that is self-discipline and self-reliance), too. In short they were treated somewhat like adults (obligations imposed but time not as structured) and they matured faster. In my family kids (especially in previous generations) had to learn to forage as well as fish and work the farm, too.

That said, kids today tend to be far more educated in academic matters, though schools (or more accurately political interest groups that pressure and even join school boards or have authority over them and sometimes even parents) tend to try to keep kids ignorant on many matters, such as turning history into a sanitized boring sludge that is useless to anyone (as textbook companies want to sell as many as they can so avoid offending as many as they can while promoting patriotism) and then there's the abysmal "sex ed" (and btw, many if not most teens know a lot less about sex than they think, even if they're having it).

---

Nailed it.

I think this pretty much is the disparity between younger persons of this generation, compared to 15-20 30 40 years ago. Having grown up through the 90's I can definitely say that at no point in education did I see any evidence of us being prepared for the 'real' world. No one tells you what life will be like, what sort of things you can expect.

quote:

---

Originally posted by aquaguy91:

haha funny you say that because I honestly can't tell the difference between a 25 year old woman and a 16 or 17 year old girl these days. by the way what am I supposed to be dealing with? lol I don't care either way, I'm just saying I think its odd that attitudes have changed soo much about this issue.

---

I work in an all girls High School currently. I can tell the difference up to about 16/17 after that it gets harder to distinguish between 16-19/20.

The more exposed to something you are, the more knowledge you can pick up, better understanding and recognition. If I look at my facial structure now, compared to how it was when I was 16/17. It looks completely different. Maybe it's perception and stylistic choices in hair cuts and clothing but I do feel like everyone goes through a lot of changes until their mid 20's.

I can also see whether a girl is wearing make up, for the most part.

posted September 19, 2013 01:24 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Kerosene:
I don't think it's strange for guys to find 15 year olds attractive, that's just how it is....

but Seriously , have you seen 15 year old these days, they look like 9 year olds now.. I remember when I was in 12th grade I took the school bus home one time and sat with these freshman and they looked and behaved like children... or maybe they were middle schoolers..?

Anyways human age expectancy is increasing and so we are aging slower.
It's just evolution.. deal with it.

---

posted September 20, 2013 10:35 PM            

I feel it depends on the individual. If you're emotionally stable and mature and have the ability to carry yourself in a relationship with an age gap as the younger partner, then go for it. Some people are old souls... I am one of them. I am simply not suited and never fulfilled by young men my own age [20-25]. I will not settle for dating someone within my age range right now due to how hurt I have been from these experiences. I have the life experience and the emotional/mental maturity to deal with an age gap. But this certainly doesn't mean that other girls just under 20 will have the same brand of maturity.

I think life experience, as I mentioned, sums it up. It's all about where you're at in life when such a relationship comes along. It's all relative. If the older partner begins feeling like a guardian or like a parent [yikes], then it's likely things are not going well at all... immaturity is a killer with age gaps. It's awkward feeling like you're on two different levels to the point where one person is lacking in wisdom and taking care of themselves so much to the point where you as the older partner have to take care of him/her. That clearly means that the younger partner needs to mature, see the world, do some soul-searching and it's safe to say he/she should date someone his/her own age, maybe even a little younger, who knows.

posted September 20, 2013 10:46 PM            

oooo justin bieberrrrrr!!!!

posted September 20, 2013 11:05 PM            

------------------
Want To Ask Any Question About Bible Prophecy? Go For it. It is Free, of course.

posted September 20, 2013 11:29 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Kerosene:
I love the intense arguments, while I can just post pictures of teenagers...
You'll change you mind..
I'm pretty non judgmental, but I think stuff like that is just wrong..

Idk when you're young it's fun to grow up with a lover, not have your boyfriend or girl raise/groom you, do you know what I mean?

---

You are just different, K. I am so sick of these politically correct people( names withheld) who can never think for themselves but always have the politically correct agenda.

I hate sheeple.. Think for yourself. You do and I respect that!

------------------
Want To Ask Any Question About Bible Prophecy? Go For it. It is Free, of course.

posted September 20, 2013 11:36 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Kerosene:

oooo justin bieberrrrrr!!!!

There's absolutely nothing attractive about teenage girls imo.
Even if some are physically mature they are still children mentally... That's why it's wrong..

---

posted September 20, 2013 11:41 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Barbiegirl19:
Those girls look 12-14 so yes of course!!! Lmao that's despicable 😟

---

what's the different between a 14 year old and a 15 year old?
Let's be real we were all that age.

Besides our bodies changing our mentally was still the same...

posted September 20, 2013 11:50 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Kerosene:
what's the different between a 14 year old and a 15 year old?
Let's be real we were all that age.

Besides our bodies changing our mentally was still the same...

---

posted September 21, 2013 07:47 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Kerosene:
LOL Really?
I just always thought I was too lazy to read up on factoids and use them in discussions.
I just go with whatever feels right.

My philosophy is do whatever you want just don't corrupt the youth by any means.

---

Yep, you go by the heart. I see you were born in the DR. Do you like Latin men do this more?

------------------
Want To Ask Any Question About Bible Prophecy? Go For it. It is Free, of course.

posted September 21, 2013 08:30 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by KarkaQueen:
I like Kerosene, I think hes funny and reminds me a lot of my funny friend. I dont think he feels the same way tho haha

---

I like him too. He thinks for himself and that goes a long way in my book!

------------------
Want To Ask Any Question About Bible Prophecy? Go For it. It is Free, of course.

posted September 23, 2013 07:49 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by somethingexcellent:
LOL! Am I...am I being yelled at? Scolded? I don't know whether to be flattered or not. This attack is personalised, tailored. Well, regardless, you are such a yummy person for it.

Any ways, I was trying to say that the age gap seems much more vast when it's between younger ages. This is because a single year of your life becomes less and less important as you continue to obtain them. What is one year to a 90 year old? It's one thing of ninety. What is one year to a 5 year old? It's one whole fifth of their life.

Years are not building blocks, all equal, but rather fractions of your life, growing smaller and smaller as you obtain more.

SOOOO to wonder why 17 and 25 seems so big and unethical when compared to 27 and 35 is easily explained. Muah!

[b]EDIT! For not reading your whole response, I didn't mean to disqualify what you were saying, if that's how I came across! I'm just a small mind with a small attention span...which it seems you've noticed, eh? Haha! I didn't mean to hurt your feelings. I'm sorry.[/B]

---

Haha, I was just being playfully chiding. I didn't mean it as an attack, or that I was hurt. I'm not sure whether to feel flattered, of course my response would be personally tailored for you.

I understand what you are saying about the age gap, I feel the same way too.

I hardly think you are small minded, attention span... yeah. I do notice things, things are there to be noticed.

posted September 24, 2013 06:31 AM            

quote:

---

Swift Freeze: I hardly think you are small minded, attention span... yeah. I do notice things, things are there to be noticed.

---