posted September 16, 2018 04:15 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Nine:
Hi.

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Hi Nine, thanks for showing up! I was wondering what sticks out to you, progressions-wise or other, about this relationship? Mir kindly introduced me to the subject and shared their insights. I'd love to hear what you observe...

posted September 17, 2018 12:15 AM            

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Originally posted by Nine:
I believe I read for this relationship in the other thread. But, I ended the reading in 2011.

Is this the person you met last year? The guy who was born 5.20.86?

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That's right. This relationship began in November 2017 and is in a confusing state right now. So it didn't end in 2011...

posted October 22, 2018 09:10 AM            

You tag me, but I don't remember this in September.

I would not be able to read the charts on those first pages, they're too big. Glad you have them here, like this.

posted October 22, 2018 09:17 AM            

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Originally posted by sassaqua:
Ok nice.. I'll have a look.

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I edited one of my double posts to save space on the thread - that's why the date looks confusing I think. Posted these new charts just now.

Please find the synastry here without the multitude of asteroids, lol:

posted October 22, 2018 09:38 AM            

And the two natals

And this is a relationships that's one on for a few years? Decades even? And you've both moved on? Still in touch though?

Sorry lots of questions!

posted October 22, 2018 09:45 AM            

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Originally posted by sassaqua:
Sorry lots of questions!

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Oh no worries - This relationship started in November and sort of dissolved in late August. But we seem to love each other so much, and keep in touch. I think we're slowly veering towards getting back together since we do not feel apart anyways. He said he felt it more like a long distance relationship than a break up. I didn't say anything, but I could feel myself smiling. We've known each other since childhood but hadn't seen each other in years when we met last year. I really don't understand the depth of feelings here!

Here's the grid, posting the natals too in a bit!

posted October 22, 2018 07:58 PM            

Ok.. I note that in your natal, anything that triggers your NN is going to be - for you - a hope of release from the pain and tension opposition between Chiron and Uranus. And his Mars squares it right on. A square is not great to the NN, but it does awaken you and it is an attractor. I am glad to see the healthy condition of his Mars, and then, your NN wont be a dumping ground for his anger. But, it is still a little restrictive to the sensitive NN.

Luckily - his Mars in your 1st is nicely sextiles your Mercury. And your Venus.

His Mars in his own chart forms some tension with his own Moon.. But, he gets a better connection with your Moon. So, this, in turn provides him some emotional soothing relief, and a road into emotions via your Moon too, that he doesn't have so much. And, your Moon, is in good condition so there's great capacity for smooth reciprocity and deepening of appreciation for each other over time.

Through his Mars, he's basically hijacking onto the emotional stability that your Moon trine Mars have, to the nice sextile with Saturn in your natal chart. Then his Mars, gives back to you in full gratitude via your 1st house. His mars being nicely aspected with his Jupiter. All very nice

His Moon is also completed in a grand trine with your Mars and his Chiron. It's wide, but that's good because it means the Mars will be a soft touch from you, the female in the relationship. Again, this is a tender aspect where he is gaining emotional relief from that tension via your protective Mars. But also, this is not a one way street - you are both soothing each other. And you trust each other at a deep level with you intimacy. This is the Chiron connection. And the Moon too.

You both have wounds associated with Saturn (you with Saturn opposite Moon), and instability, abandonment, people not committing to your well-being. Uranus opp Chiron. AND you've both got Juno there too, so.. relationships in the past, not finding the right commitment. When there are similar themes like this you feel kindred spirits, it cultivates empathy, and empathy is loves longevity.

I understand that this IS generational.. as is the t-squared with Jupiter at the apex for both of you. But it does create a base familiarity and safety via this mirroring of aspects. After all, people of the same generation carry a deep rapport and a sense of belonging via such similar aspect themes. So this gives an intuitive - ohh.. that's the way yo do things.. wow, me too. It's a recognition and you've found yourself among the crowd.

But, it does have a personal touch with you two. His apex point - his Jupiter has a nice easy flow to Mars. And your apex point (again Jupiter) has the flow to Venus. So, basically, through this painful t-square that is generational, you've found each other and offer the archetypal sexy love energies (Mars/Venus) as a way to gain liberation from the pain locked in that t-square.

Very enticing!

These points, along with the lovely Moon, Jupiter, stable Saturn, connections all bode well. They are the first ones that jumped out - I didn't take a systematic approach to looking at your natal. And didn't get a chance to look at the challenges, or indeed your synastry!

posted October 23, 2018 10:30 AM            

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Originally posted by sassaqua:
Good morning!

Ok.. I note that in your natal, anything that triggers your NN is going to be - for you - a hope of release from the pain and tension opposition between Chiron and Uranus. And his Mars squares it right on. A square is not great to the NN, but it does awaken you and it is an attractor. I am glad to see the healthy condition of his Mars, and then, your NN wont be a dumping ground for his anger. But, it is still a little restrictive to the sensitive NN.

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Good morning sassaqua. Thank you for your sensitive and constructive, intuitive comments. I was wondering how the NN/Mars would be interpreted by others, but there isn't much on this on the internet either. As I said, if there's one thing this relationship did extremely well, it was to completely revolutionize my conduct with the outside world. Rather forcefully, but it has been so refreshing. I brushed this transformation off when I heard it being noted by close friends in the beginning of our relationship, but now even I feel it. It's a bit like I'm distracted from a core wound - enough that I can go about actually doing and being as I want. It's the best thing for me about this relationship - like being shot towards in a very small rocket!

quote:

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His Mars in his own chart forms some tension with his own Moon.. But, he gets a better connection with your Moon. So, this, in turn provides him some emotional soothing relief, and a road into emotions via your Moon too, that he doesn't have so much. And, your Moon, is in good condition so there's great capacity for smooth reciprocity and deepening of appreciation for each other over time.

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I feel this soothing effect on him too. He does have a fiery constitution. Todd had also said something to this effect. It's a lot of effective communication that pierces through thoughtless action.

quote:

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You both have wounds associated with Saturn (you with Saturn opposite Moon), and instability, abandonment, people not committing to your well-being. Uranus opp Chiron. AND you've both got Juno there too, so.. relationships in the past, not finding the right commitment. When there are similar themes like this you feel kindred spirits, it cultivates empathy, and empathy is loves longevity.

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As I said, we went to the same primary school. We were both extremely shy and sensitive kids, which he expressed through troublemaking, and I buried myself in books. He had a crush on me at this period and we were teased relentlessly about it with songs and such. I always thought this to be a cruel joke and never thought it was anything real. Turns out he did have a crush on me then, and made the mistake of telling another classmate. My Neptune in 1st house really clouds my judgment on the I am being perceived. This year in my life, when we were both 8-9, is one of the most quietly sad years of my life due to familial difficulties. Strangely enough, I feel like developing these strong feelings for him decades later was able to somewhat soothe those childhood feelings of confusion and fear. I know it sounds a bit silly, but it's true.

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They are the first ones that jumped out - I didn't take a systematic approach to looking at your natal. And didn't get a chance to look at the challenges, or indeed your synastry!

I'll look again later [/B]

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Thank you once again.

As I said, stability has been a problem with this relationship. It is what ended it. It is also what enabled it to be so transformative and valuable too. I would never think I would be able to feel this strongly about someone and seeing it is reciprocated. It's really rather strange for me.

It does not seem like our connection will expire soon, so I am trying to devise mature ways to develop it so that we are each other's lives in the most happiness and peace inducing way possible. So I try to focus on the positive aspects we share and see how I keep this bond healthy and beautiful. I guess it has become evident that the love is there no matter what, and it is up to us to be both civil, empathic and constructive about it. It seems like longevity and stability may be a weakling baby bird in this relationship. I would like to do my best so it thrives and grows!

posted November 15, 2018 03:47 AM            

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Originally posted by sassaqua:

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@sassaqua, mir, todd, and everyone else who very kindly shared many invaluable insights for these charts and this relationship.

Mir, you were right! We did in fact get back together three weeks ago. We just missed each other too much. We have discussed at length the ways in which we may be able to stay together peacefully, and adapt more to each other. There is immense love between the both of us. Our current arrangement is still devoted and monogamous, but I find I am so much less plagued about our lifestyles being very different. Perhaps this is due to the heavy 8th house composite, merging and remaining equal had become an issue before the break up. When one of us tries to control the other even in the tiniest way, things blow up. (This should
all be Pluto, right?) When we leave each other be, we seem to be most enamored and fascinated with each other. I feel like this relationship is slowly dictating its own peculiar map and rules. It's like a child making its own needs met. When we are patient and listen, it is very rewarding in terms of personal development. Let's see how things will go from here.

I have also found, and this is perhaps due to the inconjuncts in the synastry, that letting go of any set expectations is absolutely key in this relationship. And talking about things. I just read the Obamas also have key inconjuncts in their synastry. One other major relationship I had also had -perhaps one too many- inconjuncts. I am an immensely curious person by nature - I feel the inconjunct gives me a sense of lasting fascination. As such, I would like to pose this question about inconjuncts in general: Would some people be more drawn to and comfortable with inconjuncts in synastry? Or is the case that we have other supportive aspects that render the inconjuncts more doable? What do you think?

I also feel, rather strangely, that I don't spend nearly as much time obsessing about the future as a person. This is a tremendous change initiated by this relationship. Obsessing about the future and building dark future scenarios used to be such a problem for me - it ruined a few relationships. To some extent it still can be from time to time, but somehow this relationship makes it possible for me to focus on the present. I wonder if this is his mars bulldozering my NN and SN? I somehow feel I am much more distracted in terms of my life direction in a much more productive way.

Letting go of whatever set expectation I have always results in a fresher outlook in this relationship. I have made peace with the fact that I simply do not like traditional romantic partners or relationships, and the fact that I was brought up seeing and expecting traditional ways of relating is only a fact, not a requirement for how I will live. Beating myself up about how I am not like the rest of my family is of no use. Are composite 1st house Neptune and Uranus the culprits?

When this relationship functions well, it is filled with laughter and joy and expansion, new ideas, deep sexual bonding and personal development. It simply doesn't respond to external judgment. This is a strange and exhilarating one. Let's see where and how it goes.