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Author
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Topic: Self-esteem: does it need to be defined by others?
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ListensToTrees
Knowflake Posts: 3844
From: Infinity
Registered: Jul 2005
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posted June 04, 2007 05:42 AM
 
Self-esteem: does it necessarily need to be defined by what others think of you? Like, one day you feel great..a buzz...because you've met someone really wonderful, or really kind, or who said something really uplifting, something which made you feel good about yourself. Another day...vice-versa. And your energy feels drained. No man is an island....so is there a way to have great self-esteem, no matter what other people think about you? Even if everyone hates you? There is a great need in most people to interact with others- because it's natural....is it possible to be a loner and be perfectly happy? Just curious. IP: Logged |
Solane Star
Knowflake Posts: 5378
From: Ontario, Canada
Registered: Jun 2005
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posted June 04, 2007 08:51 AM
Know yourself"What is necessary to change a person is to change his awareness of himself." -- Abraham H. Maslow STOP AND PAY ATTENTION! Set an intention to be more aware. Become a watcher, of yourself and what’s around you. Develop the witness, the part of you that can step back from life and impartially observe how you react and think and feel. We learn so much about who we are! "Knowing others is wisdom; knowing the self is enlightenment." -- Tao Te Ching "The true profession of man is to find his way to himself." -- Hermann Hesse IP: Logged |
Solane Star
Knowflake Posts: 5378
From: Ontario, Canada
Registered: Jun 2005
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posted June 04, 2007 09:02 AM
If it's left in the hands of others, then you know it's Low!!!!Time to be ALONE!!! With Self, then you learn to truly be your bestest friend!!! One is never really alone anyways!!! Just a illusion that we make-up!!! The word s-ELF-esteem does have the word s-ELF in it for a reason!!!!! IP: Logged |
AcousticGod
Knowflake Posts: 11943
From: Pleasanton, CA, USA
Registered: May 2005
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posted June 04, 2007 11:13 AM
In the other self-esteem thread I brought up other, not because it's the only place to find self-esteem, but because sometimes people have trouble finding their own worth within themselves.I think true self-esteem is a forgiving acceptance of yourself, and I think that when you have it you'll find that not everyone hates you. I don't think I've ever seen a person with good self-esteem who is universally hated. It is possible, in my book, to be perfectly happy alone. IP: Logged |
ListensToTrees
Knowflake Posts: 3844
From: Infinity
Registered: Jul 2005
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posted June 04, 2007 11:25 AM
Gosh, it is Time to get my printer working! I must print out this excellent advice!  IP: Logged |
Mirandee
Knowflake Posts: 4812
From: South of the Thumb - Taurus, Pisces, Cancer
Registered: Sep 2004
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posted June 04, 2007 12:20 PM
No. I don't think so. It can't be defined by others. Self-esteem can neither be given to others or taken away from others. It comes from within each of us and it has a lot to do with attitude. Self-esteem can be either boosted by the affirmations of others or lowered by the criticism and unkind words of others but only if allow that to happen. Mostly I feel on any given day depending on our ever changing moods and our attitudes on those days our self-esteem rises and falls along with our moods. We either feel very confident on some days, or lack that self-confidence on other days. On our bad days we tend to see things in a more negative light than on our good days. It's the human condition. IP: Logged |
taurean_scorpion
Knowflake Posts: 1356
From: santa monica, california
Registered: May 2005
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posted June 04, 2007 12:29 PM
For me, it's a struggle to maintain good self-esteem...I have my good days and bad days...problem is the bad days outweigh the good. Like Acoustic God said, maybe we just need to ACCEPT ourselves...and that isn't an easy task either especially if you're the type of person who is self-critical, as I am. But I am learning, or rather, in the process of accepting.Taurus/12th, Scorpio/6th, Cancer Rising. IP: Logged |
artlovesdawn
Knowflake Posts: 1177
From:
Registered: Jul 2005
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posted June 04, 2007 05:21 PM
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ListensToTrees
Knowflake Posts: 3844
From: Infinity
Registered: Jul 2005
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posted June 10, 2007 04:48 AM
I am beautiful....Special person? No. Only in as much as we ALL are. I am just like any other person, with weaknesses, as well as strengths. And at times, I may allow God's energy to flow through me. We are all strong. But we all feel weak at Times too. Even the great and wise can feel weak sometimes. They're just playing a part. Strength can be defined by the level as to which you allow positivity into your life. It is the same for weakness; it can be defined by the amount of negativity we ALLOW to take hold of us. I'm not into chart music very much, but I think this song and music video is fantastic, because truly inspired and from the HEART.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fFJTbXgFZ_8 Then I guess I will just have to try and stop letting the PAST haunt me...... IP: Logged |
Peri
Moderator Posts: 2447
From: Kyiv, Ukraine
Registered: Dec 2003
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posted June 10, 2007 08:15 AM
No man is an island, entire of itself every man is a piece of the continent, a part of the main...No matter how hard we try to be alone and learn to truly be our bestest friends, we do depend upon others since we are all connected on all levels: subconscious, conscious, karmic etc. What we need is a healthy balance between our Selves as separate beings and our Selves as a whole, the Universe. ------------------
We are not sinful, shameful human creatures who have to somehow earn Spirituality. We are Spiritual Beings having a human experience ~ Robert Burney IP: Logged |
ListensToTrees
Knowflake Posts: 3844
From: Infinity
Registered: Jul 2005
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posted June 10, 2007 11:51 AM
Right on, Peri!Or else we may feel like this: 
David Bowie....The Man Who Fell To Earth (movie, 1976). Don't you just love him?
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ListensToTrees
Knowflake Posts: 3844
From: Infinity
Registered: Jul 2005
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posted June 10, 2007 12:38 PM
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BlueTopaz124
Knowflake Posts: 1382
From: Portland, OR
Registered: Jan 2004
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posted June 10, 2007 11:38 PM
I don't feel that our self-esteem necessarily needs to be defined by others...knowing ourselves, though will help to see through the muck on down days when feeling low, and an unkind word can cut.  IP: Logged |
Swerve
Knowflake Posts: 1249
From: London
Registered: Nov 2002
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posted June 11, 2007 05:41 AM
http://www.wfu.edu/wfunews/2005/082205l.html Swerve IP: Logged |
ListensToTrees
Knowflake Posts: 3844
From: Infinity
Registered: Jul 2005
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posted June 11, 2007 06:51 AM
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Solane Star
Knowflake Posts: 5378
From: Ontario, Canada
Registered: Jun 2005
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posted June 11, 2007 08:13 AM
This so makes me want to go & put my " Free Hugs T-Shirt on & go out and not only " LISTEN to the TREES, but I think " FREE HUGS " with the TREES is ALOT MORE FITTING for MY-DAY!!!!Thanks Listens To Tree!!!! You always seem to have a WARM & GENTLE CARING PERSONA about YOU!!!!! How refreshing is that!!! IP: Logged |
Solane Star
Knowflake Posts: 5378
From: Ontario, Canada
Registered: Jun 2005
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posted June 11, 2007 08:16 AM
Thanks!!!! Listens To Trees, I have always enjoyed your posts here, you contribute & SHARE alot!!!I also LOVE David & Edward!!!!! IP: Logged |
Solane Star
Knowflake Posts: 5378
From: Ontario, Canada
Registered: Jun 2005
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posted June 11, 2007 08:19 AM
PERI THANKS!!! For SHARING That with US!!!No man is an island, entire of itself every man is a piece of the continent, a part of the main...
No matter how hard we try to be alone and learn to truly be our bestest friends, we do depend upon others since we are all connected on all levels: subconscious, conscious, karmic etc. What we need is a healthy balance between our Selves as separate beings and our Selves as a whole, the Universe. ------------------ VERY NICE!!!! IP: Logged |
Solane Star
Knowflake Posts: 5378
From: Ontario, Canada
Registered: Jun 2005
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posted June 11, 2007 08:25 AM
THANKS SWERVE for SHARING that INFO with US!!!!
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Solane Star
Knowflake Posts: 5378
From: Ontario, Canada
Registered: Jun 2005
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posted June 11, 2007 08:27 AM
THANKS BlueTopaz124, I Really liked what you SHARED here!!!
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Solane Star
Knowflake Posts: 5378
From: Ontario, Canada
Registered: Jun 2005
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posted June 11, 2007 08:47 AM
Nice AcousticGod!!! think true self-esteem is a forgiving acceptance of yourself, and I think that when you have it you'll find that not everyone hates you. I don't think I've ever seen a person with good self-esteem who is universally hated. Star Brother!!!!
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Solane Star
Knowflake Posts: 5378
From: Ontario, Canada
Registered: Jun 2005
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posted June 11, 2007 08:51 AM
HIGH-LIGHT THAT STAR SISTER!!!Ain't that a piece of the truth!!! It can't be defined by others. Self-esteem can neither be given to others or taken away from others. It comes from within each of us and it has a lot to do with attitude. Self-esteem can be either boosted by the affirmations of others or lowered by the criticism and unkind words of others but only if allow that to happen. THANKS!!! Thats so TRUE, ONLY IF WE ALLOW IT TO HAPPEN!!! That s-ELF RESPECT, BEING generated at it's BEST!!! IP: Logged |
cancerrg
Knowflake Posts: 2668
From:
Registered: Dec 2004
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posted June 11, 2007 10:34 AM
::: think true self-esteem is a forgiving acceptance of yourself, and I think that when you have it you'll find that not everyone hates you. I don't think I've ever seen a person with good self-esteem who is universally hated:::what is the forgiving acceptance of yourself ? can you elobrate ? IP: Logged |
Swerve
Knowflake Posts: 1249
From: London
Registered: Nov 2002
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posted June 11, 2007 10:39 AM
Read my link cancerg, should explain.Its called self-compassion. Swerve IP: Logged |
ListensToTrees
Knowflake Posts: 3844
From: Infinity
Registered: Jul 2005
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posted June 11, 2007 12:30 PM
Thank you, Solane Star!!  
P.S. You're not just saying that, are you? 
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Lindaland
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