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Author Topic:   Things Halmark Cards dont say ....
angel_of_hope
Moderator

Posts: 1394
From: Palmer, AK
Registered: Jul 2004

posted June 03, 2005 01:01 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for angel_of_hope     Edit/Delete Message
....some are just down right nasty!

My tire was thumping.
I thought it was flat
When I looked at the tire...
I noticed your cat.
Sorry!
-----
Heard your wife left you,
How upset you must be.
But don't fret about it...
She moved in with me.
-----
Looking back over the years
that we've been together,
I can't help but wonder...
"What the hell was I thinking?"
-----
Congratulations on your wedding day!
Too bad no one likes your husband.
-----
How could two people as beautiful as you
Have such an ugly baby?
-----
I've always wanted to have
someone to hold,
someone to love
After having met you ..
I've changed my mind.
-----
I must admit, you brought Religion into my life.
I never believed in Hell until I met you.
-----
As the days go by, I think of how lucky I am...
That you're not here to ruin it for me.
-----
Congratulations on your promotion.
Before you go...
Would you like to take this knife out of my back?
You'll probably need it again.
-----
Happy Birthday, Uncle Dad!
(Available only in Tennessee, Kentucky & West Virginia) That's just WRONG! Eeeewwwwuuuh!!
-----
Happy birthday! You look great for your age.
Almost Lifelike!
-----
When we were together,
you always said you'd die for me.
Now that we've broken up,
I think it's time you kept your promise.
-----
We have been friends for a very long time ..
let's say we stop?
-----
I'm so miserable without you
it's almost like you're here.
-----
Congratulations on your new bundle of joy.
Did you ever find out who the father was? that is so messed up!!
-----
Your friends and I wanted to do
something special for your birthday
So we're having you put to sleep.
-----
So your daughter's a hooker,
and it spoiled your day.
Look at the bright side,
it's really good pay.
-----

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virgotaurustaurus
Knowflake

Posts: 2474
From: upstate NY, USA
Registered: Oct 2004

posted June 03, 2005 01:08 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for virgotaurustaurus     Edit/Delete Message

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pixelpixie
Knowflake

Posts: 5301
From: Ontario Canada
Registered: Jun 2005

posted June 03, 2005 01:10 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for pixelpixie     Edit/Delete Message
"Congratulations on your wedding day!
Too bad no one likes your husband. "


Someone really should make this card!
{do you know how many people will say that, just not to her face?}
Usually, it is apparent as time goes by, why she is with him.. but at first, some are questionable..
Like really?

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Bluemoon
Knowflake

Posts: 4456
From: Stafford, VA USA
Registered: Feb 2005

posted June 03, 2005 01:46 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Bluemoon     Edit/Delete Message
so funny I had to borrow it!!

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angel_of_hope
Moderator

Posts: 1394
From: Palmer, AK
Registered: Jul 2004

posted June 03, 2005 02:25 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for angel_of_hope     Edit/Delete Message
glad you all liked em!!

pix - your absolutely right!! in some case though, it could work the other way around as well.

...i'm still laughing over them!

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Wednesday
Knowflake

Posts: 695
From: The big C... Canada :)
Registered: Jul 2006

posted September 08, 2006 03:10 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Wednesday     Edit/Delete Message
quote:
I've always wanted to have
someone to hold,
someone to love
After having met you ..
I've changed my mind.

Yeah!

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