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Author
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Topic: one can ever say "My Scorpio"?
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GeminiAries
unregistered
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posted January 06, 2005 01:37 AM
 
Wow, And I thought that I was the only one going through this heart break. In my situation some might call me a MASOCHISTIC because the Scorpio man that Im in love with completly controls me without being part of my life.
Does that make since? BLue Flame I understand , Maya-V great advise. It's now been two years and my scorpio is still on my mind and especially and my every thoughts. I told him that I wanted to marry him after he came back into my life after a 5 months absent. HE disapeard for 6 months. HE Came back without me calling him and then I was too scared of his mind games so I played hard to get. Now after another 6 months Im back to start a friendship/romantic relationship with a man I want to built a life with. He told me that he is single and wants and plans to see me.
BUT WORK IS FIRST. What is the best way to get this man to TRUST ME AND TO LET ME INTO HIS WORLD?..............IM now doing the calling .... HE came back once that's a good sign RIGHT? IP: Logged |
maya-v
unregistered
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posted January 06, 2005 01:21 PM
Oh gem, this is one is ready to be picked! Just need some tact and strategic planning (lol). I think I can help you there.My first piece of advice would be to be very firm with him. I mean, focus on your other activities, tell him you would like to date other people and focus on your career. Then, subtly hint that if he wanted something more serious, he would have to ask you and commit himself. At the same time, pamper him endlessly. Keep calling him, give him sexy sensous treats - well planned exotic dinners, candle lit baths, warm cozy evenings and delightful conversations unhindered by talks of your future together. Be his perfect mate, while staying just out of reach. Be totally non-commital, yet keep a mysterious smile all the while. Dont lust after him, dont pressurize too much. And, once in a while, when you have seen him too much, get away for a weekend or even the week. Dont tell him if you're going alone or where you are going. Just the night before, go sexy lingerie shopping with him. And please, dont forget to invite me for the wedding! IP: Logged |
GeminiAries
unregistered
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posted January 07, 2005 11:40 AM
Maya-V I thank you for your honest opinion. Im in Love. The thing is that I have not scene him in one year. We spoke a few times last week. he's on a businees trip for a while now. I asked him out to dinner and he said yes. But I do most of the calling, is that normal?
I want for him to want me too. The trust issue is a big one. He says how much he cares for me and that he wants to see me and thinks about me.
Commitment scares him.
We need to be friends again, but he knows how i feel about him. I dont want top be taken for granted. he once told me that I was a Diamond in the Rough. Ha!IP: Logged |
maya-v
unregistered
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posted January 07, 2005 12:17 PM
I think it is important for you to approach this on a friendship basis first. He seems to have some Sag or Libra in his chart, makes it hard for him to commit. Because I know one thing for sure, these guys love to commit and love the warmth and security of their own personal heaven.I would still suggest pampering him with sensual treats, and yet keeping emotional distance. And dont worry abt calling him, he secretly loves that. Just make sure you dont let on to him just how much you want this to work. Stay cool, enjoy, get him used to you. Arouse his senses, his feeling of being secure and comfortable. He will come around. Good luck. IP: Logged |
GeminiAries
unregistered
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posted January 07, 2005 01:00 PM
When do you know that a Scorpio loves you more then a friend. He told me that he loves me and I know that he Cares, but when will i know that im the ONE that he wants to continue with.
He had me guessing when we started back in 2003.I even introduced him to by brother as my boyfriend before he ask me to be his girl.
Maya-v you are GReat, i know how those scorps love you.
It is good to be a ***** to them . Men love bitches. Im a bit toooooo Nice to him. he is the first guy I loved this strong. By the way yes, he loves it when i call he told me that too.
His b-day Nov 5, 1969
Im an Aries, he crushed my heart without saying a word. Being ignored is so hard for me. But when we start to talk again he always wants to know why i stop calling. ****
WHY CANT HE CALL ONCE IN A WHILE. He just stops by. i see it in his eyes he cares for me. But I LOVE HIM
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maya-v
unregistered
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posted January 07, 2005 01:17 PM
Oh Gem, you are such a sweetheart. My fav cuz is a Ram too, she is so full of enthusiasm and so innocent sometimes! Maybe your scorp can see that and he is playing around. I know how it feels, I know he loves to play with you. Take away that power from him, become a little stern. C'mon, you have a diamond for a birthstone you can do it. Become your true fun loving, carefree self with him. He will truly fall for that. And dont worry, if he didnt love you, he wouldnt be back, they are too aware to waste their precious time over 'mere friendship'(lol). Trust me, all he needs right now is to admit to himself first, just how important you are to him. And only you can make him see that. Lure him, use trickery, he sure is! My advice on that remains the same. Just a word of caution thoug. Aries and Scorpio can be a real hot time, but like a flame, it has the tendency to burn out. I am not discouraging you, in fact I love unconventional pairs. You will have a hot sexual chemistry, but your fiery resltessness may leave him longing for something more steady and dependable. SO try to be grounded for him, show himt hat youc an stick to a commitment and be mature and grown up when the necessity arises. Also, once you get him, charm him with your undying idealism, your honesty and your fierce stand for what you believe in. He wont be able to resist! But for now, curb your fiery enthusiasm and lets jsut focus on winning this one first! IP: Logged |
GeminiAries
unregistered
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posted January 07, 2005 03:31 PM
.............."Just a word of caution thoug. Aries and Scorpio can be a real hot time, but like a flame, it has the tendency to burn out."......I dont understand Maya V "You will have a hot sexual chemistry" Maya-V , this is what is so hot about us. We have been intimate only once in 2 yrs, but lots of 4play "Your fiery resltessness may leave him longing for something more steady and dependable. SO try to be grounded for him, show him that you can stick to a commitment and be mature and grown up when the necessity arises." Maya-V You got me right on point i tend to walk away when he doesnt let me know what's going on with him. when he ignores me I walk. This my third and final try at this. .......... But is it?
I need for him to let me know or let me go. He has me twisted over him
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seveneieghtorange
unregistered
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posted January 07, 2005 05:48 PM
I am a Sun Cancer & Scorpio Moon, so Scorpios and I get along in a very deep soul level.
I do believe that they CAN be yours. Their eyes never lie so you would know if his feelings are true.
I was once with a Scorpio and I know he IS my soulmate. if not my ultimate soulmate, then at least a karmic one. And even if time and different causes of seperation prevent us from being together now, I know he'll be back...in this lifetime.
As I am sure that he will be back and yours to keep!! Good luck! IP: Logged |
sthenri
unregistered
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posted January 07, 2005 07:16 PM
Gemini aries, I remember you from the first time you were on the boards. You went through a lot of pain for this man the first time, remember to play cool like the others said, just make sure you are not wound up when you talk to him or see him, don't drink coffee and take your B-vitamins and lots of calcium. Aries tend to get overstimulated easily and you need to stay grounded and patient to be in any relationship.remember to take it one day at a time, not just with him, but be patient with yourself, Take Care,
Natasha
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GeminiAries
unregistered
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posted January 07, 2005 08:03 PM
Thank you guys. Yes I do tend to be on the edge when Im dealing with him. Its just that I never had to put in so much work/effort for a guy. Im used to the men I date loving me more that I love them.
I think that this is such a challenge. As Maya_v said Im very, very, very quick to walk away.
This man keeps calling ( I can actually feel it when he thinks of me...LOL) me back to him.
Another Irony that I failed to mention is thatI tried getting over him and moved on and landed on another Scorpio that remeinded me of him so much. The relationship lasted only 3 months. He always told me that he could see in my eyes that my Love belonged to another man.
HE was right.IP: Logged |
maya-v
unregistered
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posted January 08, 2005 09:41 AM
They do tend to attack in flocks ... lol. But seriously, take Natasha's advice, mix it with mine and see if it works. But the focus stays the same ... learn to be strong with your feelings around this man, trust me he is just a man, made of flesh and bones .... however perfect he might look. He has his weaknesses and his intense emotions, perhaps more than others. And he does need you, on a deeper level, he knows it, just might not be ready to admit it.
Again, your job is to gently steer him your way, not scare him away with your intense need one minute, or leave him stranded the next. Just be steady, be loyal and yet deliciously out of reach! Try babe, I know you can do it!
Good luck  IP: Logged |
ariestiger
unregistered
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posted January 08, 2005 09:51 AM
Hi GeminiAries,What signs (and what positions in your chart) are your Venus and Mars in? LOL AriesTiger IP: Logged |
GeminiAries
unregistered
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posted January 08, 2005 01:37 PM
Maya_v you say for me to be strong around him. So show him no affection? Show him that I dont want to touch him or hug him and even kiss him. Im a hugger and a kisser. I tend to show a lot of my feelings. You say to call him be "be steady, be loyal and yet deliciously out of reach"
Out of reach? Hard to get?
he can play his games. Im just me.IP: Logged |
maya-v
unregistered
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posted January 08, 2005 08:42 PM
Definitely be yourself. But dont let on how deeply he affects you, how his casual attitude can shake the foundation of your faith. Show him love, show him affection, be close and yet dont beg for commitment. Dont show him that you are waiting just for him to complete your life, show him how you have a great fun-filled world and how it would be nice, but not essential, for him to be a part of it. Your intense belief in no future without him is sending him running again and again. No man is ready for that level of commitment, except maybe a bull or an eagle, and even they would cower in the face of Mars determination. IP: Logged |
GeminiAries
unregistered
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posted January 08, 2005 10:02 PM
THanks MAya-V your great. He does feel it when I tend to ask a lot of questions about him and his life. Anyway I will do as you said because I love him. I want to have a romantic-relationship with him................ But I want him to want that too without me forcing it. As you said he needs to realize that he needs me on a deeper level.
He once told me that his life is a team and then ask what position I had on this team. " YOu are a Upper Level type" HA
Then he said that I worried Too Much. ME WORRY? LOL THe calling thing, a friend made a comment to me to read the book, "He's Just not into you". I did and alot of the things are true, but he's a scorpio and I know he loves me calling. but I have to wonder if he is sometimes sending me a hint?...............Not to call When i dont call he get's mad. I just wish that once in a while my phone would ring with him saying that he wanted to hear my voice and to see me.
But untill it happen's I will show this great man that he is indeed special to me in many ways wihtoust asking for a commited relationship.
Maya-V i wish that i could speak to you privatly you seem to know your stuff Girl! IP: Logged |
ariestiger
unregistered
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posted January 09, 2005 05:44 AM
Hi GeminiAries,I think basically what maya-v is saying, is: have fun with him, be a good friend to him, enable him to be relaxed in your company.
And from what you say, perhaps he's right, perhaps you do worry too much!! LOL AriesTiger IP: Logged |
GeminiAries
unregistered
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posted January 23, 2005 11:09 PM
Hello my wonderful people. Its me Aries Chick with a deep rooted love-ache.
My scorpio and I are on GOOD communication terms. Whenever I call he is pleased to hear my voice especially when im calm and collective. I also noticed that when i dont linger on the phone for too much he tends to want to know and talk more. GOOD thing.
BUT........................ I want to scream, what the heck is going on, what is taking so long for him to ask me to be his wife..... LOL
He just got back from Georgia on a business trip where I think he might of had a female guest, that's just a hunch, but I cant complain, we are not official........YET
I make sure that im calm when i talk to him and when I think that things are going great..... HE ask when can he make love to me again.
MAKE LOVE?
It's been a year since we last saw each other and this guy is very BOLD! HE tends to make comments about our sex lives to get a comment.
But Im so nervous to see him. He is the first man in my life that actually intimidates me? Normal or what, it is a challenge that i love and its a high to talk to him. Tonights conversation was sweet and he told me that he so much appreciated me.
Appreciate? What?NOT LOVE ME BUT APPRECIATE. One day at a time right maya-v?IP: Logged |
sthenri
unregistered
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posted January 23, 2005 11:21 PM
GeminiAries, one day at a time is a good philosophy, stick to what you want, and the Scorpio will be happy with what you decide.as for making love, sometimes a hug is better Natasha
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GeminiAries
unregistered
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posted January 24, 2005 12:54 AM
Natasha
I know a hug is better. I think he is testing me. He wnats to come over, but makes a joke about the love making thing. I loved your quote you wrote in an earlier posting
"The best way to his heart,
is to give gestures of physical affection"
"If you want him, I would hug him often because he really needs that reassurance". Very true I loved hugging him, and he loved receiving them. He does drive me crazy!But WOW I love him
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maya-v
unregistered
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posted January 24, 2005 07:05 AM
Hey Aries, sorry I couldnt reply sooner.Have you seen the movie Before Sunset? Well, I just saw it with a very true water sign scorpion pal of mine and it amazed me how the character in the movie was saying and doing exactly what a Scorpio male would do. I teased my pal abt it and he couldnt help blushing! What can I tell you ... these MEN are completely sexual! I mean, their mind is constantly exploring the intricacies of physical expression of love and I DONT MEAN HUGS! If you find that discomforting, you'll either have to get used to it or find someone else. And thats not just me, Linda says that too! Girl, you got what you wanted but like a typical ram, now you dont know what to do with it! I would suggest, letting nature take tis course. I dont mean rush into his bed, but if you ever have any fears or questions, just ask him. He will be the most patient, passionate and knowledgeable person in the field - I guarantee! Good luck, sweetie, tell me how it goes! IP: Logged |
GeminiAries
unregistered
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posted January 24, 2005 12:23 PM
Before Sunset movie with Ethan Hawke? I didnt see the movie, but I will. The funny thing is that Ethan Hawke the Star of this film is a SCORPIO.Ethan Hawke was married to Uma Thurman but couldn't keep his weewee in his pants so he lost her. LOL
SO its funny how you related the film to a scorpio male.MAya-V you give the best advise Bless You. My scorpio man is so wonderful, but I have no patience, which he alwasys ask me to have.What I want is the trust that he once gave me.I know he cares and I have to do what you and Natasha told me and just be there for him and show him that I care without suffercating him . LOL As far as the sexual relationship goes, we didnt have a problem in that area, he even ask me if i took classes in the type of techniques I have.LOL
I just wanted to have him completly as my man before I make love to him.....Again
No casual sex,that's very scary to me.
But to tell you the truth I love how deep and intense he is. His sexual appetite is a plus.
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maya-v
unregistered
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posted January 24, 2005 12:35 PM
Did you also know that Uma Thurman is a Taurus - imagine how hot that must've bin! And I knew they broke up but if thats why - he's a jerk! And so atypical - Pluto men usually dont cheat on their mate. I really liked Ethan Hawk - but not anymore.
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sthenri
unregistered
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posted January 24, 2005 12:42 PM
GeminiAries, now is the time to sit down and analyze for yourself what kind of limitations, boundaries and needs you desire in the relationship, and ALL relationships with men. Not just him. So imagine yourself in the perfect relationship, would you be living together, and where? Would he support you financially so you could take care of the household or vice versa? Imagine your perfect relationship and see realistically what you can do with this one.Once you have a guideline and the resolve, to bring it up, then bring it up casually to the Scorpio and listen carefully and consider it later. That is my advice, I did this earlier with a Cancer and I told him my needs which were to live with someone who was financially and emotionally supportive and he said he'd have to check with his fiancee, who is still in love with... So you find out more when you state your needs and have the reassurance and security to back up what you really want. It took me a lifetime to get there though, so have patience with YOURSELF, first and then you will automatically have it for others you love and like. Everyone wants something different but even having a man all to myself is not enough security unless I have what I need in the world. And I can't get it alone, plus I want someone to make me coffee in the morning and be loving and respectful. Mistakes are okay if they are confessed asap, but I won't have an open relationship ever again. Not a good idea for a Venus in Aries like me. Remember to keep your temper and you will do fine, but get your romance plan in order, not just for him but spell out what you will do too, and what you won't do. Even if you feel alone, you are not alone, you have your friends and support system which you should never let go of. But if you start to feel alone and lonely when he is right there, and insecure, that is you not him. So remember to check in with what you need again, and remember to have self love, you are getting and giving everything and that is healthy in committed relationships. Feel calm until you can talk to someone, a friend about your insecurities, your mate can't be your friend always. Natasha
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GeminiAries
unregistered
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posted January 24, 2005 12:57 PM
Natasha and Maya-V Thanks again for all the great advise. Next time my scorp and I talk and he brings up that he wants to come over and make love to me. I will say yes, and when he arrives I will HUG him all night long. LOL
I understand what you said natasha, but the thing is that kind of open talk scares him. Right now we are not even a couple. We are having a phone relationship. I want to live with him,marry him, share a life with him ect.....
but first I have to know what he wants and he hasnt told me what he wants. Last time we had a talked about our future, I told him how i wanted to get married and I didnt see him for 5 months. THAT KIND OF TALK SCARES HIM. HE NEEDS TO TELL ME WHAT HE WANTS. Right now we are phone friends, who flirt. I love him , he knows that, but its now up to him to tell me where he wants this to go. I wont be his LOVER and FRIEND.
I want to be HIS ALL.
Im so scared of running him off again.my HEART CANNOT TAKE ANOTHER LOSS
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maya-v
unregistered
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posted January 24, 2005 12:59 PM
Natasha - you are so wise and your words always soothe me and answer questions I never knew I had! Thanks for being such a wonderful person - we all treasure you!IP: Logged | |
Lindaland
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