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Author Topic:   HELP!! how can I protect myself from this person?
etherealenlightenment
Knowflake

Posts: 231
From: far away...
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posted October 10, 2009 12:37 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for etherealenlightenment     Edit/Delete Message
HELP!!! I really do not know what to do... I don't know how to protect myself from this person... I'm very afraid...This is a very sick, twisted individual, but just happens to be my bf's brother. I can't avoid him. I'm living with him.

Sorry about the senseless rambling... my nerves are just completely shot right now...

Anyway, let me explain. Ever since my boyfriend and I moved in with his brother about 5 months ago, he has been doing everything in his power to break us up. He first tried to talk with my bf and convince him to end it with me, and when that didn't work, he proceeded to manipulate me, verbally mostly, into ending it with my bf. This created a lot of tension between my boyfriend and I... we began to fight and bicker constantly, not knowing what the source was... However, over time, as our relationship began to disintegrate, I noticed a pattern... we would always fight about the things that this brother said to me about my bf or the things that he told my bf about me which were a twisted version of what I actually said. So I decided to stop talking to the brother entirely. My relationship with my bf improved tremendously! Now, some background information on the brother: He is a 27 yr old virgin that has never had any kind of relationship of his own... overweight... lazy... living off of his gma... not paying rent... working at mcdonald's 2 or 3 days out of the week... BUT he is extremely intelligent... probably one of the most intelligent people I have ever met in my life... and also very selfish and conniving. Just to add, he is an occultist. His mother left him when he was very young and so he HATES WOMEN. He proudly admits it. And even though I have gone out of my way to be friends with him, because I am female, he hates me. He is extremely disrespectful... I've been supporting him on my measly 400 every 2 weeks' paycheck for the past 5 months!! And I get no respect whatsoever!! Just to add, the reason that he wants me gone is because he knows that my bf (being the typical cancer that he is) has a real weakness for family. He knows that he would NEVER turn him away for any reason, and so he is using my bf in order to live off of him. He knows his gma won't be around b/c she's moving to FL and so he wants to have someone to leach money off of, ensuring that he never has to pay for anything himself. He's actually told me that the only reason he can stand my bf, is b/c it's his brother!! How evil is that?!

Anyway, so here's the thing: Ever since I stopped talking to him and he knows that he cannot manipulate me verbally anymore... I think he's turned to his occult skills... I can't prove it of course, which makes me look crazy to my bf, but I FEEL it. I don't know how to explain but whenever he's around I just have this overwhelming tension in my body that doesn't feel natural... I swear I'm not crazy lol I just have a really bad feeling about him and what he's doing... I know that he can manipulate certain events though... he's done it before and shown me... I don't know what he's capable of but I know that he doesn't have any qualms with hurting people... He's jokingly said that he wouldn't hesitate to murder someone if the situation called for it... although I don't think he would go that far, I do think he could try to hurt me in some way... He's trying harder than ever... my bf and I have decided to move out but I think the brother won't stop until he gets rid of me and the relationship... please help!!

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etherealenlightenment
Knowflake

Posts: 231
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posted October 10, 2009 12:52 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for etherealenlightenment     Edit/Delete Message
Here is his chart:

I can't really pinpoint it but there's just something really OFF about him... I just know that he's doing something... something bad... although I can't even explain it or put it into words... Once again, I'm not crazy!! But I'm extremely vulnerable to my environment and I can FEEL when something is wrong even if I can't prove it... Is there anyway for me to protect myself and the relationship from him??

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Nine
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posted October 10, 2009 12:53 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Nine     Edit/Delete Message

In these situations, moving out the best thing.

I was in a similar situation; withering away, and suffering mysterious illnesses. The instant I moved out my health improved.

Once I started studying numerology I discover that the places, more than the person, weren't compatible with my lifepath #.

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etherealenlightenment
Knowflake

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From: far away...
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posted October 10, 2009 01:00 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for etherealenlightenment     Edit/Delete Message
It's not the place. It's the person. There's something really sinister about him... When he had eye surgery and was gone for almost a month.... all those things went away... and my relationship with my bf was so happy...

I'm afraid that he'll break us up or do something to me before we have a chance to move out...

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etherealenlightenment
Knowflake

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posted October 10, 2009 01:26 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for etherealenlightenment     Edit/Delete Message
How can I protect myself until we move out??

Please! Any ideas anyone??? I really think he's manipulating my energy fields or karma...

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GypseeWind
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From: Dayton,Ohio USA
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posted October 10, 2009 01:29 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for GypseeWind     Edit/Delete Message
Thats terrible EE.
I hate living with other peoples family.
I had the same situation when I had to live with my husband at the time and his brother.
same thing with the brother, very intelligent, but no social life. In my case the brother was addicted to porn.
I actually walked in on him, err, you know, in the living room, when I was supposed to be at work.
I found myself locked in my bedroom when my husband wasn't home, just to avoid the brother.
I was worried because I didn't trust what he would do, and I was pregnant.
I finally couldn't take it and moved.

Could you maybe, set up a tape recorder and engage him in a conversation to where he says incriminating things that you could play for your bf?

As I was writing that, I got a strong sense that no, you shouldn't do that. For some reason I feel like I should tell you to kill him with kindness.
Yes him to death.
Just be super agreeable.
I think that would deflate him and drive him bonkers.

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etherealenlightenment
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posted October 10, 2009 01:39 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for etherealenlightenment     Edit/Delete Message
Thank you so much for the advice Gypsee Wind!!

But the thing is I'm not speaking to him anymore. Whenever I tried the whole "kill with kindness" thing before, he manipulated me into thinking that he was my friend, and lied to me repeatedly about my bf. At first, when I stopped... things were great... it's like he wasn't even there... I couldn't even feel his prescence... but then he started to do things that he knows will drive me crazy on a domestic level... really disgusting things... like (I can't believe I'm typing this) leaving butt residue and hair on the seat of the toilet when he's done... EWWWW!!! SO sorry about the gruesome details but I'm trying to convey the gravity of the situation... and of course, bc it's his BROTHER, my bf won't say a word to him... just little things like that... but then when that didn't work... I don't know... I really think he's been manipulating my energy field or karma or something along those lines... I just know that he's resorting to something very wrong... and he won't stop until I leave my bf... all so he can leach off of him for the rest of his life...

btw... I'm really sorry to hear that you went through a similar situation... Did you ever tell your husband about what his brother was doing? Did he try to do anything about it?

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iQ
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From: Chennai, India
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posted October 10, 2009 02:13 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for iQ     Edit/Delete Message
I believe you.
He is misusing his KAALI opp Uranus powers to apply "chaos" magick. If he is 27 and virgin, he may be using chaos sex-magick with the help of masturbation to create negative vibraitons and rattle your Aura.
All of this will come back to him if he continues, during his Saturn Return.

You can protect yourself for now using Violet Tetrahedral Visualization. www.tamsoft.co.in/violet.html

And... Do move out the moment you get the chance.

------------------
Soul Mate Love Calculator

http://tamsoft.co.in/articles.html

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Azalaksh
Moderator

Posts: 764
From: New Brighton, MN, USA
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posted October 10, 2009 02:27 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Azalaksh     Edit/Delete Message
There are semi-precious stones you can carry with you -- string a few of them into a necklace or bracelet you can wear every day:

Agate - stress relief, protection
Amber - protection, thwarts negativity
Black Onyx - spiritual connection, awareness, protection
Hematite - protection, deflects negativity

Here's the entire list:
http://www.mayhemltd.com/edu-crystals.htm

I feel better when I wear my stones -- turquoise, citrine, amber/jet and fluorite are favorites.....

Good luck
And get away from your boyfriend's brother ASAP!! You are being *USED* -- supporting him with your hard-earned salary is just inviting more abuse from him
You and your bf can move out into your OWN place -- start looking for a new apartment today.

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etherealenlightenment
Knowflake

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posted October 10, 2009 02:54 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for etherealenlightenment     Edit/Delete Message
Thank you so much IQ and Zala!!

I really appreciate your responses!! I'm definitely going to try to get some of those crystals... and do the visualization...

I've already started looking at apartments... but I know that it will probably be another month before we're able to move... sadly... it's also very difficult to find an apartment in our area... there is very little available...

Yes, I know I'm being used... but part of what upsets me is that my bf won't say a word to his brother! I mean, I know that he's a Cancer (stellium) and that family is the most important thing to him but shouldn't I be important as well? It's like no matter what his brother does he won't even tell him to stop because he doesn't want to upset family. He says that it puts him in a very uncomfortable position b/c no matter what, at the end of the day, he's still his brother.... ugh!!

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scrappydog
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From: Texas
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posted October 10, 2009 03:03 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for scrappydog     Edit/Delete Message
Moon right on the asc and mars square neptune, seems like a very manipulative combination, even devious and probably good at it. Sounds like a psychic vampire to me..

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Glaucus
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From: Sacramento,California
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posted October 10, 2009 03:15 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Glaucus     Edit/Delete Message
to some people, blood is thicker than water.

some people don't want to be forced to choose between relatives and people that they have relationships with no matter how unhealthy the situation is with the relatives.

my exgirlfriend with her man-hating mother (because her husband cheated on her and left her with no money) was a similar situation.


I agree with others that say that moving is the best thing to do.


also maybe you give him too much power over you by believing that he has the ability to have power over you. The power of belief can be factor in psychic attacks. There is that surrounding yourself with white light that is said to be useful, but all that can mean is that with positive thinking,you can protect yourself from negative things happening to you. Law of Attraction does seem to be about how your frame of mind is a factor in life's happenings. Even the idea that crystals,stones work is the belief and possible law of attraction that they work when there is positive thinking that they work and will provide protection. Studies show that antidepressants have a placebo effect. If you think they work, they seem to work. That's how I think of things like crystals,stones working. I think that it's all about getting yourself in a positive frame of mind. The human mind. is very powerful. It's more powerful than people in general realize.

also from the looks of it, the dude needs to get psychological help if he has issues with hating women as well the other things that you told about. Some of things that told could fit in with schizophrenia or schizotypal personality disorder.


Raymond

------------------
"Nothing matters absolutely;
the truth is it only matters relatively"

- Eckhart Tolle

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etherealenlightenment
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posted October 10, 2009 03:32 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for etherealenlightenment     Edit/Delete Message
oh yes, scrappydog, he's devious all right... and pretty darn good at it too!!

Glaucus, this was very interesting insight you provided... you're right! I shouldn't believe that he has power over me... but he really does frighten me... I don't know what he would resort to and that really does frighten me... I feel a little hopeless at this point b/c my relationship with my bf is just barely hanging on a hinge... and it's all b/c of HIM...

So you were in practically the same situation? How did you handle it? What was your ex gf's reaction to the situation?

A part of me really feels hurt knowing that no matter what he does, my bf will never say a word to him... It makes me feel very powerless... I understand that family is important but I am important too!! It's as if he's completely oblivious!! His gma (who is the only female figure he had growing up) even told him that the brother is manipulating me. She said that the brother has major issues and that it has nothing to do with me: it's simply b/c I'm a woman. She also said that he should put me before his brother... but even after SHE tells him all of this (and he ALWAYS listens to her) he won't do anything about it!!

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scrappydog
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posted October 10, 2009 03:43 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for scrappydog     Edit/Delete Message
I'm sorry, but the fact that your boyfriend won't say a thing to him speaks loudly. If a person truely loves you then I think they will always stand up for you. By saying and doing nothing, your boyfriend is also disrespecting you girl.

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Glaucus
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From: Sacramento,California
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posted October 10, 2009 03:48 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Glaucus     Edit/Delete Message
"So you were in practically the same situation? How did you handle it? What was your ex gf's reaction to the situation?"

she's my exgf. That should tell you something. she stayed with her mom and kicked me to the curb. that was pretty much it. No contact from her since the day she broke up with me.


Maybe you should just confront your bf and put your foot down. Encourage him to fight to save your relationship. If he cares about the relationship as much as you do, he will see things your way.


It's a very complicated situation,and so I know it's easier said than done. This dude seems like bad news overall,and it seems like something has to be done about him within legal limits.


I wish you great luck.


Raymond

------------------
"Nothing matters absolutely;
the truth is it only matters relatively"

- Eckhart Tolle

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etherealenlightenment
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posted October 10, 2009 04:42 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for etherealenlightenment     Edit/Delete Message
Thanks everyone!!... you've all really been a big help to me... It is a really complicated situation...

But I'm going to try to deal with it the best I can. And yes, Glaucus and scrappydog... you're right, I'm going to have to confront him and put my foot down.

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Cheshire Kat
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posted October 10, 2009 04:52 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Cheshire Kat     Edit/Delete Message
What does him being a virgin and having no social life have to do with him being evil?O.o

Ever since I moved to college people have been giving me a hard time about not having this so called "social life" or a "sex life"..the truth is I kinda feel the same way as the brother does, just it's not women,it's mainly people.I really do not like many people because their so judgemental and shallow at times.

That I just want to get away but because I can not I pent up so much inside that I act out and become this very cold and uncaring indivaul.

You know maybe he justs want to get away as badly as you do but probably does not know how so he resorts to doing bad things, like I do so people can get away from me and leave me alone.

I admit I am probably ten times worser then brother, though I do not break up people's relationships or leech off people but the hatred I have most people is just scary at times.

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etherealenlightenment
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posted October 10, 2009 06:17 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for etherealenlightenment     Edit/Delete Message
Cheshire Kat... I had no intention of offending anyone. I could care less if he's a virgin or has a social life. That was just background information that could provide some insight into why he is so horribly bitter.

One philosophy that I've always had, is that I do not judge people based on their personal habits and the way they are UNLESS they do something to me personally that is very hurtful or to someone that I care about. It's not the fact that he doesn't do anything and has no life that bothers me, it's that he's a devious, conniving, evil-minded person that just b/c HE'S not happy, is determined to make other people unhappy as well. Also, I am genuinely frightened of what he could do to me.

I'm sure you're nothing like him. Like you said, you don't go around trying to break up people's relationships and ruin lives... so obviously, you handle yourself much better than he does.

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Lyra
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posted October 10, 2009 06:29 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Lyra     Edit/Delete Message
DON'T be nice to him, because it won't work. Those types of people don't know the meaning of the word "nice". Get out of there ASAP, and DON'T, please, DON'T, give him any more money. The guy does NOT deserve it.
Maybe you could do something to his room or something...just something mild and annoying that the culprit can't be caught for...put used frosted light bulbs in a new pack in the drawer so they look like new ones...stuff like that to make him think he's going crazy. At least it will give you some of your self-respect back and gladness that you gave him a taste of his own medicine.
When people try to mess with my head now, I mess with theirs right back. Plus I make a point of getting as far away from them as possible. Tackle this guy and don't, whatever you do, let him scare you, he is obviously a nutjob and these people can smell fear - I have just got rid of someone like that. Warn the police of his disturbing behaviour if you can - just to make sure they have something on him. At least when you are away from him and have NO CONTACT it will be easier to deal with.

Wishing you lots of love, light, and good luck,

Lyra

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etherealenlightenment
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From: far away...
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posted October 10, 2009 06:42 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for etherealenlightenment     Edit/Delete Message
Lyra, haha frosted lightbulbs... interesting... do you have any other ideas like that? I can't really think of anything and I might just take your advice

Well, thankfully... just as I was seriously contemplating giving my bf an ultimatum and leaving him if he does not comply.... he called me from work on his break and apologized for everything. He said he just feels horrible about the way everything's been going and he'll help us find a place to go as soon as possible... maybe even ask his dad for money if we can't find a place in our price range... whatever we need to do to get out of there... He said he's just been really stressed from work working 13-14 hr days and that's why he's been reacting that way... so good... at least he's willing to fight for our relationship...


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Azalaksh
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From: New Brighton, MN, USA
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posted October 10, 2009 07:52 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Azalaksh     Edit/Delete Message
quote:
he called me from work on his break and apologized for everything. He said he just feels horrible about the way everything's been going and he'll help us find a place to go as soon as possible...
That's great news!!!!!
Family may be blood, but when they're toxic to your health or sanity, I think one must get away from their influence.....
Good on your bf for realizing that this situation is destroying your r'ship and at least *talking* about doing something about it!!

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Cheshire Kat
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From: Wonderland
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posted October 10, 2009 09:07 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Cheshire Kat     Edit/Delete Message
It's good your like that and I saw your butterfly thread, the world needs more people that care and less people like this guy and me giving it a big thorn in the side.._.

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etherealenlightenment
Knowflake

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From: far away...
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posted October 10, 2009 09:38 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for etherealenlightenment     Edit/Delete Message
well thank you Cheshire Kat... but don't say that the world needs less people like you!! What have you done that is so bad?? Just b/c you're going through a difficult time right now doesn't mean that there's anything wrong with you or that the world needs less people like you!

If you'd like to talk I'm here to listen. Just let me know and I'll send you an email...

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Glaucus
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From: Sacramento,California
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posted October 10, 2009 10:28 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Glaucus     Edit/Delete Message
" so good... at least he's willing to fight for our relationship..."

Good! I am very glad. Romantic love relationships are worth fighting for!

Raymond

------------------
"Nothing matters absolutely;
the truth is it only matters relatively"

- Eckhart Tolle

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Lonake
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posted October 11, 2009 12:35 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Lonake     Edit/Delete Message
he's got some triggers going on right now with t. pluto squaring his mars and t. saturn about to conjunct it. those 2 add up to a good amount of frustration, i agree get out as soon as you can cos if he's this weird now it's gonna get worse. this boy needs an outlet/life.

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