Posts: 28
From: UK
Registered: Mar 2010

posted March 10, 2010 10:24 PM         

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I have a question about astrological aspects which may lower a persons attractivness. I am Libra with my sun, moon, pluto and mercury all in libra in the 7th house. My rising sign is Pisces and my venus is bang on conjunct my descendent in virgo.

If I look at myself objectively I sort of have the raw material to be attractive at least facialy but I can't seem to get it too work.

Make up and pretty clothes look silly on me, no matter how I try to fix my hair up it always looks a mess 2 minutes later. It is impossible for me to be well groomed and tidy as even when I really try I always end up looking messy and unkempt!

My skin is super oily with impossible to control blackheads and oil bumps even now in my 30's and my body is a disaster. I am over weight but even when I have lost weight my body is still awful as I have small boobs, big hips, square bum, saddlebags, bad legs and flat feet. I am not at all the beautiful sexy libra I would like to be?

Is there anything in my chart or any other astrological aspects not here which might cause this? I think it might be my venus opposite the ASC, do you think?

How to I overcome this and will I get any better looking (wishful thinking I know!).
http://www.flickr.com/photos/48173103@N04/4424104068/

Thanks for your help!

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posted March 10, 2010 10:35 PM         

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You know - personally I think having that much Libra you are BIG on aesthetics.. and with the Virgo Venus you criticize things about yourself that others would overlook.

Your description in that post sounds like you are picking yourself apart.

I think the problem is with your self-esteem and being too harsh on yourself - not the way you actually look.

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posted March 10, 2010 10:41 PM         

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I think that being I can be critical and yes I am an artist and beauty is very important to me! It is possible that when I realised I was never going to live up to my own ideals I sort of gave up on myself a bit which has only made things worse. I wish I could find a way to make the best of myself as my feelings about how I look do affect my confidence a lot.

Interestingly though my standards of beauty only really effect my view of myself. I actually tend to be more attracted to men other women find ugly or at least not very attractive. I have never found the looks of a Brad Pitt or George Clooney my thing at all.

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From: LA & Vancity
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posted March 10, 2010 10:46 PM         

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Beth,
I feel bad hearing you say that about yourself...perhaps your being overly critical. I have a libra stellium/Asc, and I know what your saying...for example I havent gone swimming since I was 9yrs old even tho I would very much like to (seriously!). The reason is cuz I think I look horrendous in a swimsuit. I know most people think that's a crazy, retarded reason...but it's a bit of a phobia for me.

I tend to feel like if I cant make the world a prettier place, it's better not to uglify it. I guess that comes from Libra's often unrealistic, idealistic thinking when it comes to aesthetics. Although I do find having a libra stellium makes me lazy & indulgent in some ways. Such as weight, I really have to watch myself closely & work really hard at staying fit (compared with others).

Astrologically speaking, people say hard aspects to your Asc or Venus. Although I've always found this confusing or contradicting. I see charts of gorgeous actress/models with bad aspects...or average looking people with supposedly great aspects. *shrug*

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posted March 10, 2010 10:56 PM         

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You have Venus in Virgo in the 6th as dispositor of all the Libra. So you'll tend to feel not incredibly great looking. You may help others out a lot to compensate for this. The messy appearance could be tied to Pisces rising, too. But you could aim for the sexy disheveled just got out of bed look? Venus square Neptune is one of the "babe" aspects so you cant be that bad. It's also an aspect that causes you to be completely oblivious of your appeal, they tend to downgrade themselves, theyll have people fawning over em at times and have no earthly idea as to 'why'.

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posted March 10, 2010 10:56 PM         

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I think it might be my venus opposite the ASC, do you think?

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I don't think so.

There is also another opinion saying that venus/ASC aspect makes someone attractive, no matter it's hard aspect or harmonious one.

As for my own opinion, I would say I'm not sure about venus/ASC square but I'd never think venus/ASC opposition an unattractive aspect.

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posted March 10, 2010 10:58 PM         

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Perhaps it is just a combination of being hard on myself and having venus opposite my ASC. I am libra and my ruling planet venus is in virgo which I believe makes one critical and is also considered the worst placement for venus making it less likely the native will marry.

It is interesting what you say about swimming and not wanting to uglify the world. I feel very much like that when I put on make up, a nice outfit, jewellery and perfume I feel such a fraud and I think I look ridiculous. I prefer to dress very plain and not make anything of myself self because I don't want people to think that I imagine myself to be pretty because I don't. I just feel like other women have this secret I don't, I feel diffrent to them.

Actually men do often like me but not sexually.

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posted March 10, 2010 11:04 PM         

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Read my post above.
In response to your post above, you have Sun Moon NN Pluto etc in Libra in the 7th. You are doing a disservice to yourself by thinking about yourself this way. If you want style like you seem, then it's not too hard to acquire. You just have to find what you like. Department stores did, or do now, have personal shoppers that can help you dress your body. No matter your size you can be sexy/attractive, it's in what you put on and how you carry yourself. The right piece of clothing can hide/emphasize anything.

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posted March 10, 2010 11:05 PM         

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Thanks for all your responses! It is helpful I'd love to be able to start working with what I have and make the most of myself while I'm still youngish! I am a 32 year old woman and have never once felt attractive and desireable and I'd like to know what that felt like!

In the past when I was slimmer sometimes a guy would take an interest but I did tend to be oblivious to it and he would have to be very blunt to get me to see his interest. Also to be honest most of the time men have shown an interest in me sexually it has made me very uncomfortable, I don't expect it and so if it happend I don't know how to handle it at all!

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posted March 10, 2010 11:12 PM         

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I agree that you are most likely be overcritical of yourself.

Chiron in your 1st house really fits how you feel about your appearance.

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posted March 10, 2010 11:18 PM         

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Interesting I never considered the effect of chiron in my first house, it also fits with my tendency to be attracted to those overlooked by others I think. A lot to think about thank you!

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posted March 10, 2010 11:23 PM         

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You're too cute lol

If you're afraid of standing out don't be it's OK, if you're afraid of being seen as competition to other women, don't be, because every woman is desirable and will be desired at one point or another. Like you said you were you just didn't know how to react! So you have to just get comfy with that part of yourself. Sometimes the attention from men can be annoying I guess but unless they're obscenely rude it's always a compliment. Easiest thing to say is thank you.

You know what's funny is that dressing right for your body is all about proportion and balance which is all Libra. So whatever you have, add the opposite, it's that simple. Short waisted, you wear something low rising, but not too low if you have a tummy, and no short tops. Small boobs, then you wear tops that have details to add interest, and never crew necks which flatten you out even more, brighter lighter colors on top and darker colors on the bottom, since the light draws attention and the black, brown, navy, dark grey will detract. If you want to deemphasize your backside then make sure it's all about back pockets that arent too big. Hips are OK since curves are good. Just like that on and on. And you can exercise with pilates which helps with trimming if thats what youre after, or whatever exercise size you like, it doesnt really matter as long as you stick with it. If you get bored easily change it up, too, since you dont have to stick with the same thing. I guess good Libra exercise would be dancing, maybe beginners yoga too, so you could work to achieve balance.

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posted March 10, 2010 11:25 PM         

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quote:

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tendency to be attracted to those overlooked by others

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This is so completely Venus in Virgo.

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posted March 10, 2010 11:25 PM         

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I hardly ever think that I'm attractive, either. My sister thinks that I've been dealing with Body Dysmorphic Disorder, but I'm well aware that I'm not as pretty as she is (although I have things that are attractive about me - I know that. Some days I feel like the ugliest woman alive, though).

I have Chiron conjunct my Sun, in the 6th, and the ruler of my ascendant (Pluto) is under stress, thanks to an opposition from Jupiter, and a square from critical Saturn.

I'll edit this out in a while, I'm not trying to hijack. You just have me thinking about my own chart.

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posted March 10, 2010 11:27 PM         

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What about your Venus, teasel?

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posted March 10, 2010 11:32 PM         

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Im sure your attractive, everyone has something great about them. You need to stop thinking your unattractive so you can feel sexy. My make up and hair look like crap after 20min too .. And i am 26 and still cant walk in high heels and i have a ghetto booty no matter how much weight i lose i look very pale without make up.

Without my ghd hair straightener i would look like shrek.

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posted March 10, 2010 11:34 PM         

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I wouldn't think that "unattractiveness" could be in any chart because beauty is an opinion. Everyone is beautiful to someone!!! It's in the eye of the beholder!

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posted March 10, 2010 11:35 PM         

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Lonake - my Venus is in Gemini, conjunct Moon, square Mars in Pisces, widely trine Pluto, sextile Jupiter, and I think there's a minor aspect between Venus and Saturn. (It's been a long time since I checked.) Depending on the house system, it's either at the beginning of the 8th house (Placidus), or the end of the 7th (Koch and Equal House).

Saturday, my self-esteem was great. It comes and goes.

*edit. I meant to add before, that I wouldn't know what to think about aspects representing physical unattractiveness. Self-esteem definitely comes into it.

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posted March 10, 2010 11:37 PM         

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Beth, I also always fall for guys others would overlook or consider "weird looking". not sure where this comes in..I don't have Venus in Virgo (rather, Scorpio).

i agree with the others about you being too hard on yourself, though. i'm attractive but if i thought about every single one of my flaws i'd feel ugly, too. maybe you just haven't found your style?

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Capricorn sun :: Sagittarius moon :: Scorpio ASC

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posted March 10, 2010 11:39 PM         

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Teasel,

ahh yes Body Dysmorphia & your good ole' saturn square. That made me think of my chart too. I had some BD issues too during my teens...and I have Saturn cj Asc by 1 degree.

I dont think your hijacking, as we're all trying to learn from each other's aspects/experiences~

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posted March 10, 2010 11:43 PM         

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Teasel add your chart if you wish as I'm interested to know what other people who have these same feelings about themselves have in their charts as well, I guess it is nothing specific that makes us feel / be this way but a combination of subtle influances. Funnily enough a doctor I was seeing about my skin said he thought I might have mild BDD but I don't think so, I think I am just being realistic about myself.

Lonake, your suggestions are really great. It is odd that on one hand I really want to feel desireable and have men notice me (or at least have certain men notice me) but I am also scared of this. I have pluto conjunct my sun and I always feel that this makes me want to hide in some way and I hate to be centre of attention and feel mortified if anyone says anything nice about how I look or about me at all really.

I never thought of my attraction to the under dog as being a venus in virgo thing but it makes sense. A lot of the men I have really liked have been men other women have called ugly but to me it is always someones inner light which is attractive and I never fancy a man by looks my interest is only activated by the "vibes" I get from them, so I am 100% honest when I say that looks are not important to me in a partner. However I judge my own looks very harshly indeed so its a bit of double standards!

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posted March 10, 2010 11:52 PM         

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Two of my girl friends have venus conjunct asc and I dont find either of them attractive.

One of them have it in Aries and the other has it in aquarius. They are both love sick puppies. In and out of relationships with a million guys. But nothing attractive about them.

I know another male with venus in aries conjunct his ascendant and he looks like prince

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posted March 10, 2010 11:56 PM         

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"Beth, I also always fall for guys others would overlook or consider "weird looking". not sure where this comes in..I don't have Venus in Virgo (rather, Scorpio)."

la_sexorcisto, that thing about falling for the odd looking overlooked guys is interesting to me. I did a briggs myers test and my type is INFP The Idealist and apparently this type is also prone to be attracted to those others overlook.

Scorpio is such a deeply sensitive sign that perhaps having Venus in Scorpio means you can sense and be attracted to what is usually hidden from others? I am not a scorpio person but I have pluto conjunct my sun which gives me some insight or affinity with scorpio types I think.

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posted March 10, 2010 11:58 PM         

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Venus conj Sun is another one, they're not all model/movie-star/turn everyone's head, thats for sure! It's actually an aspect that can turn really ugly because they get so self-involved.

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posted March 11, 2010 12:01 AM         

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Venus in Scorpio could have a similar manifestation but it would be coming from a different perspective.
The attraction for Venus in Virgo to those overlooked is because they themselves feel that their chances would be better with this type, and youre right they do value more than just the physical. But this is isolating Venus in Virgo, not taking into account your whole chart.

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