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Author
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Topic: Which House Is Your Pluto In?
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Ami Ann
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posted August 02, 2010 08:55 AM
  
One book calls Pluto --the id, your most basic, primal self.
Last night, my mother pulled another thing on me.
I was telling her how well I was doing getting my sanity back.
I am gonna play music with my friend who is a professional musician.
I was telling her how happy I was.
She tried to undermine me. She threw guilt, shame and doubt on me . THEN,she told me I was imagining it.
Pluto is the one you have to trust..
If you don't have your Pluto operating --you are gonna go down.
I can tell you that from experience. You are gonna go down far and bad.
Pluto is a TON of energy. It has to go someplace.
Mine went in to my stomach. When I got angry, I got stomach aches.
Then, at some point , with so much anger ,I could barely eat.
The people closest to me were telling me they LOVED me and undermining me : trying to destroy me on the level that only Pluto could detect--the real level.
This is how I got screwed up. There were things ON the surface and things BELOW the surface.
If I responded to below the surface I was punished.
So, at some point--I was afraid to even see below the surface.
My mother is really evil. I hate to say it or think it but it is true.
Scott Peck wrote "People of the Lie"
He said that some conditions were NOT mental/emotional illness but evil, even though no one wants to say it or even think about it.
I feel freaked but Pluto will TELL you what you need to know.
That is your connection with Pluto--real, real feelings, real heart, real soul, real about the horrors YOU could do, too.
That is the hard part.
No wonder no one wants to look at Pluto lol
Ami ------------------
Who looks outside dreams;who looks inside wakes. Jung IP: Logged |
soulful122
Knowflake Posts: 190
From: Where I want to be..
Registered: Jan 2010
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posted August 02, 2010 04:29 PM
Ami, it's in my 1st. I feel like I'm constantly changing. I'm very self aware, of my feelings, my boundaries, my personal space, I'm a very private person. Besides my boyfriend, I don't like it when people stare into my eyes, not even close friends.
Funny as it is, most of my good friends now, admitted they didn't like me at first. I'm really glad that changed, first impressions can really suck. I still wonder if it's the Pluto in 1st they feel or the Mars. I can come on too strong, or not at all LOL.
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jane
Knowflake Posts: 1270
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Registered: Jul 2009
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posted August 02, 2010 04:30 PM
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Ami Ann
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posted August 02, 2010 04:38 PM
So glad you wrote ,today ,Soulful and Jane !
I was feeling SO hanging out there  Ami ------------------
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jane
Knowflake Posts: 1270
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Registered: Jul 2009
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posted August 02, 2010 05:23 PM
quote:
Pluto in the first has made me since I was just a baby hold a very strong gaze with others. I can no longer do this as others seem to feel the "heat" of my gaze even if I just look in their general direction( in a total non-perv way mind you lol) for over five seconds even with their back turned. They then turn around with a disturbed look on their face because they "felt" my energy so easily. I hate this, so I tend to do my best to look at anyone but people when I'm out in public to avoid this.
 I'm glad zanarkand brought this up. I know what he means! I don't have Pluto in the 1st, but I do have a Sco Asc and a 1st house Sco Mercury. I'm uncomfortable talking about this. I don't know if it's my modest Virgo placements or my 12th house Pluto that likes to downplay my personal power. It's hard for me to even type "personal power" w/o rolling my eyes at myself. I need to get over that.  But yeah, the eyes thing. I constantly get comments on that. Of course it's been a big thing in intimate situations, but what's strange is how big of an issue it is with the public. If I'm doing any sort of public speaking that gets feedback, my gaze is always mentioned and has been since I was a kid. I go through the same thing as zanarkand with strangers feeling my eyes, so like him I don't look long. I sometimes wonder if my memory is exaggerating what happens, so every now and then I test it out. And, yep, they feel it. Now what's really freaky...people get hypnotized. Ridiculous but true! It's happened with teachers, bank tellers, all sorts. It first became a consistent issue when I was a waitress during college. With some customers, if I looked them in the eyes as they were ordering, their minds would go blank and they'd forget what they were saying. This happened so often that I learned to weaken the way I look at people. Recently I've deliberately stopped weakening my natural gaze, so I've been experiencing that hypnosis more often. Just last week during a meeting, I was looking at the person speaking. His words slowed...then sputtered to a halt. Finally he said, "I'm sorry but I can't think when you look at me." I was like, Sco Asc b1tches! Feel the burn!  I think Pluto in the 12th contributes to the hypnotic quality. Ahh, it feels good to get this off my chest. IP: Logged |
jane
Knowflake Posts: 1270
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Registered: Jul 2009
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posted August 02, 2010 05:27 PM
Ami -Good to be here. I always enjoy your threads.  IP: Logged |
Ami Ann
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posted August 02, 2010 05:27 PM
I am so glad you are there (((Jane))). x o Ami PS No one commented on my signature  ------------------
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jane
Knowflake Posts: 1270
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Registered: Jul 2009
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posted August 02, 2010 05:41 PM
quote:
PS No one commented on my signature
B@stards. How does one shake a Pluto? Doesn't Pluto shake us? IP: Logged |
Ami Ann
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posted August 02, 2010 05:44 PM
Well, I see it as one of those Christmas ornaments where you shake up the snow from the bottom and it starts snowing.
My Pluto was there--just at the bottom lol
Ami
PS Maybe if I have to explain it--I should take it off  ------------------
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jane
Knowflake Posts: 1270
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Registered: Jul 2009
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posted August 02, 2010 05:49 PM
Nah, I was just being a silly brat. You've inspired me to make my own Sig. ------------------
Shake Uranus. IP: Logged |
Ami Ann
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posted August 02, 2010 05:51 PM
OK, I leave my Sig for now but the NEXT one is gonna be a high brow Jung Ami ------------------
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soulful122
Knowflake Posts: 190
From: Where I want to be..
Registered: Jan 2010
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posted August 02, 2010 06:05 PM
Glad to be here with ya' Ami! I like your quote, but Jane's quote got me ROTFL!
"Shake Uranus" -.-'
Hahaha
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Ami Ann
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posted August 02, 2010 06:06 PM
Dear Soulful ,
I JUST got that
x o
Ami
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BearsArcher
Moderator Posts: 197
From: Arizona with Bear the Leo
Registered: Apr 2010
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posted August 02, 2010 06:16 PM
Ami Ann, Wow.. I really liked what Stephen Forest had to say about Pluto in the 1st. I have been on both sides- the kid that blurts out something or some secret to a relative (I'm also a Sag Sun / Aries moon), to learning to keep things to myself to the point where it can rush out like a volcano. It has been later in life that I learned to balance the two- even then, there are times that I resort back to not talking about anything too intense or being too rigid. My husband also has Pluto in the 1st and I find that he is one of the few people that really understands me, even when I don't realize what I am doing as far as claming up. Thank you for the posts IP: Logged |
venus in gemini
Knowflake Posts: 883
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted August 02, 2010 06:37 PM
Ami,
Have you every read anything by Carolyn Myss? She says that we come into this life with an empty power pack. And one of our jobs in this life is to retrieve the slivers of your power that the people in your life are "holding". We have to retrieve all the missing pieces, and add them back to our own power pack. Some people only have a very small piece, so the retrieval is minimally painful. But the major players in your life, i.e., mother, father, spouse, siblings, hold much larger pieces. So it's a given that the process could be bloody.At this point in your life, you need to be pure Pluto with your mother. Your mother has emotionally manipulated you throughout your entire life. It's time for you to own your incredible Pluto power that's been given to you in this lifetime. They are waiting for you to take back the sliver of your power she is holding. This is YOUR POWER, that she has held and that she has turned around and used against you for a very long time. I know your Cancer Moon struggles with that, but it's time. I had this mother too....so I am speaking from experience. Check out Carolyn Myss when you have time.
http://www.myss.com/ IP: Logged |
teasel
Knowflake Posts: 2683
From: Ohio
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted August 02, 2010 06:41 PM
quote:
It's a powerful placement. I don't feel the power as coming from me, but coming to me. It's like the music that raises a cobra. Pluto's the music and I'm the cobra. I love the fuel it shoots into me. Although the power doesn't come from me, what I do with it does reveal who I am. I can most clearly see my personal self when my Pluto is aroused.
 My house placement depends on the type of chart used, so I go with the 11th. I feel the same way when it comes to talking about personal power - I think Ami commented on the way I poked fun at myself in another thread, telling me that I was downplaying something I'd done. I talk more here and at another place on the web, about certain things, only to feel embarrassed about it afterwards (if it's on the more personal side), but I don't talk about it much with others away from the computer - if I can't be cheerful and enjoy someone's company, then I don't want to be around them. (I mean - not being a downer with them, and fully present. If they need me, I'll be there.) I used to hate being alone - at first - when I was a child (if I had to stay home when I was sick) in middle school. I'd cry when my mother left for work, and again when my sister left with school, then make a cup of tea, have a nap, and enjoy the rest of my day alone - perfectly content, and then happy to see everyone when they came home. I've grown to enjoy my alone time ever since - I live with my family, and on Saturday, when my parents drove my sister to Canada, my mother remarked on the fact that I was going to have the entire day alone, so it would be perfect for me. A couple of weeks ago, it was a very different matter: one night, I was in tears, and I sort of squeaked out a protest when I heard her say something about going to bed - only she didn't hear me from up here (I ended up just falling asleep, thankfully - my mood was low that night, and I was dreading being alone, but I hadn't left my room to say anything, so nobody knew). I started to open up more, when people in my personal life (those back in England, or not here with me every day), and online, kept calling me 'mysterious'. It was really getting on my nerves, considering the fact that I had been talking about things (just nothing too personal). I'm okay with posting pictures here and there, with giving my general location - things like that. I'm not so okay with exposing my vulnerabilities - although, in a way, that's the only way for me to really be strong. If that makes sense. As long as the focus doesn't stay there, it can be freeing - too much focus keeps my energy there (obviously) which isn't a good thing. One thing I loved about drawing and painting, was the way I would lose myself in it for a while - it was like a healthy drug (I've never tried the other kind). But that's Neptune. Trine my Midheaven, and my Jupiter - I'm hoping, with the big Neptune transits I have coming up, that it will manifest in a positive way, like that, rather than anything less healthy.
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Ami Ann
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posted August 02, 2010 06:53 PM
Thank you Venus in Gemini
I love Carolyn Myss.
I think I am a natural medical intuitive.
I cannot do what she does which is describe the exact condition in the body but I get a sense of lightness or heaviness as to if it is serious or not.
Thank you for your kindness and warmth to me! x o x Ami
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Ami Ann
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posted August 02, 2010 06:57 PM
Teasel Sweetheart
If *I* were in your shoes now, I would force myself to be vulnerable.
I should not say "if I was in your shoes" cuz I AM
I force myself to be myself cuz that is the only way I will defeat what my mother told me which was that I was bad, different, weird, unique and generally not acceptable.
x o x Ami IP: Logged |
crabbypatty
Knowflake Posts: 377
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted August 02, 2010 07:02 PM
Ami: I too, have a Cancer moon, and I too, have a mother who during my childhood did a whole lot to undermine my self confidence. I still have a relationship with her, in fact she takes care of my 5 year old son frequently, etc (only because I have carefully determined that he is safe in her care). I have come to the conclusion that she is classic BPD (although much, much improved since my father passed away, for some reason) and that is why I am able to continue a relationship with her, because of that understanding... to me, it takes some of the personal blame off of her for many of the cutting remarks and past abusive situations. I'm also well aware of her traumatic childhood, so I forgive her for a lot of things... I figure her emotional development was truncated at some early point and she is not self-aware enough to not hurt other people. So what I'm about to ask is coming from a place of "been there, done that" and not from a judgmental place.Ami, why are you still talking to your mother when she so regularly cuts you down? Are their any positives in the relationship with her? Does she support you, ever? You've piqued my curiosity, and sorry in advance if I'm being too forward. IP: Logged |
teasel
Knowflake Posts: 2683
From: Ohio
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted August 02, 2010 07:06 PM
Ami. The thing is, once it's over with, I'm generally okay, and then I wonder where all of the fear came from. I still have no idea how I let that stupid anxiety into my life for so long - as another bit gets chipped away, I feel better, but at the same time, more angry, in a way.
Thinking of your thread from last week, was it? Re: living your sun sign - as long as I'm feeling my Aries (so to speak ), I'll be just fine. (Of course, a lot of the time, nobody needs to know anything too personal. I'm talking about exposing enough that people I'd like to be closer to, get to know me, rather than feeling as though I'm holding back.) IP: Logged |
Ami Ann
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posted August 02, 2010 07:11 PM
Crabby, you can ask anything
I started talking with her again for certain reasons of which I am aware.
One is that I feel she loves me down DEEP.
She cares with a mother's care but it can be buried deeply--at times--many times.The other reason is that I am coming out of being numb and I don't know what is real and what is not about my perceptions.
Was she as bad as I thought? Was it my fault?(I know people say "No" but you still feel it is)
WHO is she--the person that made me practically lose my sanity ?
When she dies--I will have no answers.
I want to see the truth is the short answer, Crabby.
You shall know the truth and the truth will make you free.
I have been numb for so long. Pain is better than numb.
At the end of pain will be wholeness--God willing .
x o x Ami
PS Please comment Crabby or anyone on my reasoning.
Anyone can be honest with me--at all times. ------------------
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Stargazer
Knowflake Posts: 45
From: just left of center
Registered: May 2009
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posted August 02, 2010 07:13 PM
Pluto in the 8th Virgo
Sextile Mars and MC in Scorpio
Trine Asc in Cap.I am very intense and magnetic. I have a lot of energy and prefer to be around those who can be open. Closed off drives me crazy.
I don't do one night stands and share myself cautiously.. I really don't do casual at all. Had my share of sorrows,too. Made me strong, though. IP: Logged |
Ami Ann
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posted August 02, 2010 07:19 PM
Do you have any other planets in the 8th Stargazer?
I have Gemini Sun, Gemini Mercury and Cancer moon.
Ami ------------------
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naturalbeige
Knowflake Posts: 59
From: Portland, OR
Registered: Jul 2010
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posted August 02, 2010 07:24 PM
My Pluto is at the end of the 9th house and at the beginning of the 10th house in Scorpio (Scorpio is also in my MC, and in my Venus at the 10th house).For the ninth house, I'm obsessed with finding sexual hypocrisies in people and society. I just read an article on Bob Marks' website and Pluto in the 9th emphasizes mostly on religious hypocrisy. I lived in North Carolina for 14 years, and hated it. I left for the West Coast two years ago because I felt that I didn't fit in with my liberal politics and agnosticism. As for Pluto in the 10th house, I'm fascinated with doing artistic/avant-garde things in my career. I love some types of indie and foreign films (though I do have good mainstream choices) and hope to start taking dance lessons again. I want to take lyrical dancing after seeing Kate Bush in her video for Running Up That Hill. Plus, I love listening to post-punk/goth music. The Pluto in my houses also explains my love for astrology and for "dark" men. My favorite celebs are not the Brad Pitt/Tom Cruise types. They are actors (mostly method) who do a good job playing bad ***** , however they can play other types well too. IP: Logged |
Stargazer
Knowflake Posts: 45
From: just left of center
Registered: May 2009
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posted August 02, 2010 07:29 PM
Yes, I do.
Residents include...Uranus, Juno, Karma all conjunct with Pluto
Sun Merc and Venus as well when using Koch or Equal houses.. Oh, and POF
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