posted February 16, 2011 12:29 AM            

I don't want to sound biased but whouldn't
Cancer placments make someone more whimpy and passive, while pisces placments more "flaky".

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Capircorn Rising
Gemini Sun, 5th House
Aries Moon
Mercury in Gemini
Venus In Taurus

posted February 16, 2011 01:38 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by SpooL:
I think its more Cancer as opposed to pisces.

I don't want to sound biased but whouldn't
Cancer placments make someone more whimpy and passive, while pisces placments more "flaky".

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posted February 16, 2011 11:12 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Lucia23:
Cancer placements--I wouldn't say they make you more wimpy and passive. They make you more emotionally self-protective, needy, and vulnerable. Cancer will "test" to see if you love them, and get emotionally wounded by something another sign might let roll off his/her back.

Pisces placements--drifty and escapist. People with Pisces can't imagine having any kind of emotional or verbal confrontation...which leads to lots of mixed messages. Also they don't like to decide what they want romantically. They like to drift into a happy, perfect, rose-colored fog where everything is beautiful, and if it starts to not feel like that they like to swimmy-fish out and disappear. Ironically, though, I know some (Suns and Moons) who stay in unhappy relationships out of guilt because they don't want to hurt someone. Something about the dynamic of need and obligation. Neptune-influenced people need to beware of deception and self-deception.

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I think our similarties are kinda part of the conflict.. We both want the other person to take charge and do it... We are both are a mix of fire/Water him more water me more fire..

We both have Venus in Cancer in H4
My Pisces Asc verse his Pisces Moon

So yes I agree with what you said.. We are both in our shells, especially since we have such a past with each other..

He's a body builder or at least works out A LOT .. His arms are bigger than my legs. lol... But he's just a big o teddy bear.. He tells me I could throw you around like a rag doll... (in a joking way)

We talked last night for about an hour..
I have no problem keeping up with his need for stimulation.....
He's OMG your a trip!!

On the outside he's not a passive person, he does have an Aries Asc/Mars...

posted February 16, 2011 11:59 AM            

He just can't make up his mind.

posted February 16, 2011 01:48 PM            

Because when you are ready, as a watery Lion you'll probably be full steam ahead. You know what this guy is like (passive, and your history together is full of complicated hurts and breakups and near-misses and mixed-messages and breakups)...so it might be that right now you don't want someone to be like, "I love you, I need to see you right now, I can't imagine tonight without you and I can't imagine a future without you."

Was your husband more like that, and a less-passive type? Because your ASC just shows how you start things off. As a watery Leo when you're *really* ready for a relationship, it'll probably be with a guy who is straightforward and directed and will try to take the lead.

The bodybuilder stuff sounds very Aries Mars, lol.

posted February 16, 2011 07:30 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by SpooL:
The way he talks kinda sounds a little bit like me, Lol espically when he said
"well I don’t want to bug you, and figure your busy, and your in one of your moods,
and you will call me, when your feeling better.."

Belive it or not i've said something along those lines before and in the same context, lol.

Personaly, I wish he never came back into your life theres a big risk you'll let me into your life
and you'll end up hurt again.

I've read alot of your posts and replies and I think your honest and fair enought person that
shouldn't end up hurt.

Lucia23 and blugrey,

Your both right there are some rally watery gems out there that act like this, I mean one of my old Gem frends is just so needy. he has lots of water in his chart.

Johny Depp and Donald Trump whould be on the other side of the spectrum.

I find myself more in the the borderline,
I mean, I can be passive some times with my mars in Cancer and then other times be vary confident and sure of myself with my Capircorn Asc and Aries moon.

puting aside his Pisces Moon/ Cancer placement how compatible are you with him?.

If your vary compatable he could just be borred wanting stimulation and wanting to
start problems so the two of you can "work together and solve" and become closer that way.

So its either that or he is to passive.

Worst case scenario you can become boring and he'll leave after that point,
but of course thats extreme worst case scenario.

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Ahhh Thanks.. I appreciate that... Im am leary about him, and I do have my guard up.. idk if I could give myself to him at the same level I did a long time ago..

We do have good synastry... We were soooo good together back in the day, and I think thats what both of us are doing, trying so hard to get that back, but it just doesnt seem to work out that way..

I actually hit him better than he hits me.. But I was totally mesmerized by him back then.. I truly had eyes for no other man...

Synastry wise
I have 4 planets in his 5th... So he fancies me... lol
My venus in his 3/4th
My venus conjunts his Sun 2Can/29Gem.
His Venus/Mercury in my 5th
His Sun/Saturn in my 4th

My Venus trine his Moon

My Jupiter puts a Leg on his t-square
His Mars puts a leg on my t-square

Thats just a few.

My/His placements

posted February 16, 2011 07:38 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Lucia23:
Lioness, it sounds like maybe *you* aren't quite ready for a full-on relationship with anybody right now? Recent hurt or something?

Because when you are ready, as a watery Lion you'll probably be full steam ahead. You know what this guy is like (passive, and your history together is full of complicated hurts and breakups and near-misses and mixed-messages and breakups)...so it might be that right now you don't want someone to be like, "I love you, I need to see you right now, I can't imagine tonight without you and I can't imagine a future without you."

Was your husband more like that, and a less-passive type? Because your ASC just shows how you start things off. As a watery Leo when you're *really* ready for a relationship, it'll probably be with a guy who is straightforward and directed and will try to take the lead.

The bodybuilder stuff sounds very Aries Mars, lol.

Do you have a water Moon? Scorpio?

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And he writes poetry

I have a Leo Moon. I can be gung ho, but my Cancer venus.. Will stop and think and put up that shell... I do have the shell up with him... Im very leary about him...
Im not sure if I can trust him or not..

My ex is a virgo with an Aries Moon and LEo Venus/Mars..
So yeah he chased me down.. I didnt want anything to do with him.. I couldnt stand him... I was actually seeing Gem, when my husband starting hanging around.. He told me get rid of him and be with me.. I said euhhh no way!! I dont want you...
Well that didnt work..

Actually my ex husband is a sore spot with Gem, and Gem is a sore spot with my ex husband..
Think Im playing with fire here??? lol..

Gem told me Virgo was chasing you even though I was in the picture.. And you fell for it!! AND you flippin Married him!! WTF is that???

posted February 16, 2011 11:34 PM            

I've had a few long-term Gem relationships and I always seemed to take the lead. Didn't know it but it was just too fun flirting!

A Gem told me after we got together that he was on the fence but our connection pulled him over. Even though you have a history, it may be blocking you both. Clear the air and get past whatever bad feelings or questions about each other. He won't be the one to bring it up. He'll just stay safe until he knows he can dive in.

He's not totally into this with you yet. Because from my experience, once they jump off, they are with you %100.

posted February 17, 2011 12:05 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Steam:
Did you ever have a good talk with the Gem about your past and all that went down?

I've had a few long-term Gem relationships and I always seemed to take the lead. Didn't know it but it was just too fun flirting!

A Gem told me after we got together that he was on the fence but our connection pulled him over. Even though you have a history, it may be blocking you both. Clear the air and get past whatever bad feelings or questions about each other. He won't be the one to bring it up. He'll just stay safe until he knows he can dive in.

He's not totally into this with you yet. Because from my experience, once they jump off, they are with you %100.

---

We did talk about everything and cleared the air during the entire venus rx... We yelled and go out everything we didnt back then.. We never once argued back then... I just told him I knew and then walked away..
Its a long story.. but come to find out I hurt him also, which I never knew..
He wasnt ready for it to be over back then.. I had no choice but to walk away, and move on.. We then rejected each other for 2 years.. He YELLEd at me saying "YOU KNEW it wasnt OVER!!"

We are both leary about each other.. We both do have our cancer shells up...

He says I dont give him enough attention.. That I need to call him for often.. I feel the same way about him..

These last few days we have been talking several times a day.. He says I want to make sure I talk to you before you go to bed...

@@@Because from my experience, once they jump off, they are with you %100. @@

Thats funny, because that EXACTLY what he keeps telling me..

I told him, where I will be this Sat.. He said he's going to go, so lets see if he shows or not..

posted February 18, 2011 04:27 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Steam:
Get your Leo fire in gear and lead him around. Pay no attention to who does what right now. Do what you feel, and he'll follow to watch, laugh and be by your side to see what else will happen. In that process, he'll fall hard. It's the only way to get him out of his head and jump start his heart.

No more fears as you are both wiser and have dealt with the past. Gemini's are quite sensitive but don't show it to just anyone. He needs the reassurance of your confidence in your relationship with him. Fire and air combo needs the fire to play it's part to ignite the air into action. Once he feels secure, he will be the giving partner you desire.

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Ahh I liked that.. We have been talking alot more. We talked last night for 2 hours.
HE keeps saying I dont give him enough attention... Go figure.. lol The Gem wants more attention than the Leo..

I told him today, Im not going out tonight, (hes going to a concert) and that I will be making steak burgers for dinner, and for him to swing by the house and get one, on his way to the concert..
He said COOL!!! I'll do that..

posted March 03, 2011 04:27 PM            

But I do remember thinking at one point about him getting into a car accident..

He did tell me that he got into a really bad car accident, a few years back.. Only I dont know the dates or time frame to compare if it was around the same time or not.

I also remembering thinking what if he was in jail.. He did spend one night in jail.. LOL...

btw.. We are not talking AGAIN... lol.... I told him, its best if we went our seperate ways... He ended up saying some mean and hurtfull things to me after that.. Since me being a strong leo and you know that leo ego, Im soooo not going to get over what he said... I havent spoken to him since.. I dont really want to either..

But regardless its ok... I know I will see him again one day... lol..

But we will never be able to get on the same page.... but we will probably try again, one day... lol

posted March 03, 2011 09:17 PM            

Some things I would never get over.. Some things I can..

Damaging my pride/ego is a hard thing to overcome... My cancer goes into mode..

posted March 03, 2011 11:22 PM            

After reading your posts very carefully, I really think he genuinely feels you may hurt him again. He is not playing games. The fact he kids around like that is obviously to test you so you'll say "no, of course not, honey. You know that i want to talk to you! Why would you ever think that?"

True love...

In love, you don't care so much about your feelings, as you care about theirs...

This is the problem here. With the history you guys have where you were both hurt, you have become so wary against the other person that the only person's feelings you can think about right now are your own. You are both so on the lookout for getting hurt by each other that there is simply no room to think about each other's suffering nor room to show your vulnerability to each other and just say "this makes me sad." or in txting it would just translate into " :/ " Lol. This is a common occurrence, I see this all the time. What you have to do is put aside your own needs and say, "he is hurting and scared right now. He needs me. I will show him that I DO care about him. And I will do it over and over again, until he is sure! No matter what it takes. His rejection of me is a defense mechanism for 'i feel like you don't care, and that makes me so sad.' "

You wont chase him bc u are hurting just as much as he is. BUT here's the solution: this is how you get your validation that he does care----if you text him, and he texts back, he cares. If you call him, and he picks up, he cares. He prpbably will be hesitant to call you so you will have to take the lead time and time again. You have to understand, he really feels that you will hurt him and that u dont want to talk to him. So, if anything, do it so that he will feel better. Do it for him. Put your feelings aside. Selflesness and TRUST that the other person really always has ur back (and could never fully turn against you)---that's love.

posted March 04, 2011 12:09 AM            

Only I have really mixed feelings about him.. I want to try, then I dont...
I waited 10 years to see him again, and then it was disappointing. Neither of us are the same...
I dont think I can ever get back what we had back in the day.... I dont know if I am even capable of feeling that again. I dont think he is either...

Your right neither of us is willing to give in to the other... I really dont see it happening...

When we talked we talked for 4 hours (well argued" He got the F-U attitude with me.. I didnt get that with him... I told him if thats the way you wont to walk away, then so be it.. but I refuse to stoop to that level.. He continued... I did say that I cared then and I care now, but we cant see eye to eye.. He said yeah not the first time, and wont be the last time..

He did say some things that damaged the ego.. Very hard for me to let that go... I didnt do that to him... I could have, but choose not to...

Because of the things he said, and him being the only one, I will not be the first to call... lol... Ok I know my leo stubbornness.
plus he made a specific point to say "remember who called who" and for me to not forget that or deny it later... I said ok I know I called you, bc I wanted to see and talk to you.. Im not denying it.. He also threw some private things in my face that I told him.. Which told me, not to trust him. I told him, and I have no regrets.. I would do it again..

He doesnt see me clearly... He's to busy making assumptions about me... He thinks they are "fact" I standing there scratching my head saying WTF you get that from????

Anyways.. I still know its not 100% over.. He will call me one day.. Not now, but one day he will.. Or we will run into each other.. We only live 5 mins apart..

The things that I really liked about him, back then he wont do anymore.. Saying "I dont give it, like I use to"
but Thats what I want..... Thats the part of him, that really attracted me to him...

I will think about calling him.. but IDK... I dont know if I can....

It may just be time to let him go, for once and for all.. I did hang on to the "thought" of him for over 10yrs...

We did reunite during Venus rx... It just took longer than the rx for us to figure out what we needed to know.. maybe...

He wants me to give him all the attention, and not give me anything back...
Im a Leo no attention, no loving... lol

Its time for him to step up... or forget about it... lol

posted March 04, 2011 12:46 AM            

Oh my god.. I keep reading your post over and over again...

idk..... I dont know if I can... I get so frustrated trying..

He makes me feel its useless... oooo

posted March 04, 2011 03:58 AM            

I have more hypothetical messages for you to send him lol...

"1. Bad news is: at the message board I post on, we’ve diagnosed you with pisces-cosis.. but we’re not entirely sure you don’t also have cancer…

posted March 04, 2011 06:40 AM            

Lioness- I agree with much of what RAS said. But I think that you two expecting it to be the same after all these years is unrealistic. We as people change over time, some a more than others and others a lot more than others. One thing I've realized is that age does not equal maturity. I see that you are both hurt and unless you truly forgive each other than you can't move on from this little dance. I have forgiven some people that have hurt me. One of the things I needed first was a sincere apology, which I did get. Only then was I able to forgive them. I haven't forgotten the pain I went through but I try to separate those people in my head BA and AA. Before apology, after apology lol. It's how I deal with it.

You can't expect it to be the same because the both of you went through 10 years of life with out each other. You each grew separately for a large portion of your life. Experienced a lot of hurts that have changed you and the way you look at things. There may be some things that you haven't let go of from then and may be imposing it somehow on your relationship with him.

I held on to someone for 7 years so I know what you mean. We would see each other occasionally during that span of time and when I finally saw him again, and we were able to sit and talk I felt disappointed as well. I could see how I had grown but could tell I had surpassed him in some sense of growth. There were things he could not connect that I could, and I wondered how long until he can? I suppose I let him go in a way. I can still remember how much I loved him. He hurt me quite a few times. Firstly by cutting me out of his life as advised by his ex gf, whom he still hates. (She wrecked him psychologically) Secondly by constantly contradicting himself, telling me that he never loved me and that he wanted me around bc of the great sex and then saying how he can't be intimate without feeling for the girl. I got angry because I knew he did love me at one point, I could see it just by looking at him, I felt it. I was angry at his whole sex/feelings things because he completely contradicted himself. Among a few minor things he told me, where I could see what was really going on and when I told him he flat out said "no", yet anyone would have come to the same conclusions I did. So I understand where you are coming from.

Forgiving someone is not easy. Neither is apologizing sincerely when you are hurt. Ego's can be very damaging. I know because I've experienced the ego's of others and my own, the effects have scarred me, yet each had their own lesson. If we don't learn our lessons we will repeat them over and over again and in consequence stunt our own growth.

posted March 04, 2011 06:53 AM            

Seeing how you have like a gazillion planets in Leo your insight would be appreciated

I hurt my Leo by allowing someone else to get in the way. Due to this person I had to tell him to not contact me again. I didn't want to do that but felt forced to. He tried several times to contact me again and at the end this person got involved and f*ed it all up. I finally got a hold of his phone number and called him. After realizing who I was he hung up on me. I called and left a voicemail apologizing and sent him a text message saying the same. He responded to the text saying he was engaged and wanted nothing to do with me (see the synchronicity?) I told him that I was thankful for his kindness and caring and will never forget it. That I hope one day he would forgive me.

posted March 04, 2011 01:55 PM            

No I don’t mind at all.
I don’t think I said the story on this thread, so I will tell you the story.. One to get it out of my system, and 2 because It may be similar and you can understand my perception. Which hopefully help you understand your leo.

First though I do want to be honest, if he’s telling you he doesn’t want you to contact him, and that he’s engaged. Then Im going to have to assume, this is his true feelings at what he wants right now… Im sorry I don’t want to sound blunt or rude, he’s being honest and telling you where he stands. A part of him may think differently later or may have regrets.. But I cant say for sure..
He has committed his mind else where, he wants to remain loyal to that commitment..

I don’t know what exactly happen with you two.. I would need more details to get a better perspective of how I would feel.

As for me and Gem we met at a club on my 25th bday.. When he walked in, I was dancing on stage (lol) I saw him walk in, and he saw me dancing on stage.. Our eyes locked.. (Im usually not for for love at first sight) As soon as I saw him, I was mesmerized.. I knew I just had to meet him. I watched him the entire night… I watched to see what type of girls he danced with or checked out.. This went on all night… Then at around 1am (THE HOUR OF MY SR) his friend approached me, and asked me if my name was “Lioness” I said yes.. He said I thought that was you, remember me from HS.. I said no… lol… His friend was hitting on me, I was so not interested, and wanted to make it known I was interested in his friend.. SO I said who’s your friend he’s cute? He said ooo well then I will introduce you.. He left and came back with Gem.. We started talking, but couldn’t really hear each other, so we went outside and talked until the club was over.. He then followed me home, his friend dropped him off. We stayed outside on the porch until 8am or so talking.. We both got tired and went inside and fell asleep next to each other on the couch. (not doing anything) We sleep for a couple of hours, then we woke up.. I gave him a ride home…

After that we were together every weekend, spending most of the weekend together.. I knew something wasn’t right about him, but I just couldn’t put my finger on it… I also choose to ignore that feeling, and just go with it.. I felt so good around him.. I didn’t want to loose that good feeling. I was falling head over hills and fast… Only neither of us ever discussed our feelings.. We would just see each other, and have a good time, and go with it.. We never had any discussion about feelings or what we wanted… This went on for 6 – 8 months.. give or take..

At some point during the process I was at a bar, and this guy grabbed my arm and said hey.. I pulled away.. I said don’t grab me or touch me.. Well this guy started talking to me friends (my friends are very friendly) My friends told this guy we are here every Fri.. Come by when ever, here’s our number if you ever know of parties or what ever.. ( I will call this guy Virgo)
Virgo starting hanging around with us, and going where ever we were…

I was seeing Gem, and Virgo was always hitting on me, telling me to leave him he’s no good, come and be with me.. Ill treat you right, and Ill give you the love you deserve.. I said to him I cant stand you, and leave me alone.. I only have eyes for Gem. At one point I got so mad at Virgo I threw a remote control at him, it hit him in his head, and caused a lump… LOL.. I just wanted him to leave me alone. Virgo and Gem weren’t friends but knew each other through myself and my friends.. When we would go out or have a party both would be there.

Also during the same time, one of Gem’s friends was hitting on me… He actually got obsessed with me. He would call my house 30+ times.. I told Gem he just laughed and said ahhh that’s how he is don’t worry about it. Ill tell him to leave you alone.

One day when I got home from work Gem’s friend was standing on my porch, yelling at me telling me “why are you late” I was like WTF is your problem and who are you to tell me Im late and time me.. He tried to kiss me, I pulled away said what the hell are you doing??? I don’t like you, I don’t want to be with you, just leave me alone.. Leave and get away from me!!!
Well he got relly ****** !! He said IDK what your doing with GEM ANYWAYS! He’s only using you.. Once he leaves here he goes home to his wife.. I will call him John.. lol

A rush of “I knew it” and it all makes sense now, (the something not right feeling) all came rushing in.. I could literary feel my heart breaking into a million pieces.. Just a shattered feeling inside.. I complete and utterly felt my soul being destroyed right at that moment in time. I didn’t even know what to say.. I told his friend just to leave… He tried to kiss me again.. Again I refused saying I don’t you I don’t like you!! HE said but I told you about GEM.. Whats the problem? I made him leave..

I didn’t call Gem, I wasn’t sure if he knew I knew or not.. A week went by and I didn’t hear from him.. I was at a point where I just couldn’t face him… Well the weekend came, and he called me, telling me he’s at his friends house, If I want to come over… I wanted to confront him, so I said yes.. I went to his friends house (another friend)…
When I got to his friends house, all of his friends were there, including John. John looked at me like WTF are you doing..
I stayed for a bit, then me and Gem left.. We got in the car, I drove around the block and parked.. I told him I know.. I know the truth now.. He said I don’t know what you mean.. I said yes you do.. I know that your married.. HE said Im not married… HE went on to deny it for an hour… But I knew it was true… I knew he was lying.. I told him that. There were no tears, no yelling.. I was calm and collected… I just would say I know its true.. Im not going to believe its not.. I told him to never contact me again.. That it was all over..

He said OK, he got out of the car and went walking to his friends house. I left and went home.. I was still emotionless.. I couldn’t feel anything, it was like my entire body was numb.. I was so anger at me, for letting him get so close to me, and for me not to trust my gut instinct.
I was madder at myself for falling for it.… I wasn’t anger at him.. Sounds weird… but I was sooo mad at myself for allowing this to happen.. I should have known.. Well deep down, I did know something, but I didn’t listen to myself.. I let him hurt me.. How could I have done that? This is what I was thinking…

A month later he shows up at where I would hang out at on Fri.’s night’s. Again I was in the bar I looked at the door right when it opened.. We locked eyes… He turned and went back outside.. His friends came and was talking to me and my friends.. I waited like 30mins.. Then I went outside, and I saw him, we sat out side and really talked.. He finally admitted it was all true, except that he wasn’t married, but he did live with someone.. He sat and finally told me the truth.. He said he was sorry, but he just wanted to see me, and spend time with me.. That he really enjoyed being around me. He said how good I made him feel… Again no yelling or crying.. We just talked it out. We talked outside until the bar closed, then I went home, and he went wherever…
A while later I was home in bed, and my phone rings.. I knew it was him… It was… He said I wanna spend one last night with you, closure… If you feel that you need closure also, we can just hold each other all night… I agreed… ( putting head down, in shame..) But I needed that last night also.. So we spent one last night together.. It was very emotional.. Just knowing this is the last time.. It was very deep and intense..

He would call me from time to time, just to see how I was doing.. He would leave hour long messages on my voice mail.. Telling me what’s going on with him..

At some point… Virgo was still going out with me and my friends… Virgo saw I was going through a hard time.. He would tell me, that he would love me, if I just gave him a shot.. I kept refusing.

Me and Gem did get together maybe 1 more time after that, We needed another night of closure.. I don’t remember the circumstances of how that one came about..

Virgo started doing little things for me, and would help me a lot.. One night Virgo showed up at my house confessing his feelings for me… Then the phone rings.. Its GEM… He’s telling me how he misses me.. ( talk about being at a crossroads.. lol) I told him Virgo is here, and he’s confessing his feelings for me.. HE said WHAT!!!! No make him leave!! Virgo hears me on the phone.. HE starts yelling at me.. Is that GEM! Hang up on him.. How are you going to sit and talk to him, after what he did to you? Gem can hear, he says Hey Lioness make him leave.. He’s lying to fall for his lies… At some point he gets mad, and says well do what ever you want, its your decision. He hangs up on me..

I tried to make Virgo leave, but he wouldn’t.. He ended up passing out.. This next day we became closer and then we started to see each other, and he showed me so much love and affection. Virgo spent everyday with me… A few months later we decided to move in together.

The night before Virgo was going to move in.. Gem calls me and tells me “guess what” Im single now!!! We can see each other whenever.. I said well, Virgo is moving in tomorrow.. We are going to start living together.. Gem said OO I see.. Ok then, we will be friends… May I call you ever once in a while, just to see how your doing… I said yes..

Everything was going well with me and Virgo.. Gem would call every once in a while, and mostly just leave a long voice mail telling me what he’s been up to.. We would talk, but rarely..

On my 27th Bday I was walking into a store, not paying attention, I was looking in my purse, getting my wallet out.. I walked through the door, and I bumped into some one.. I said Sorry and I looked up and it was Gem. He grabbed me and hugged me… We talked for a while.. Then I left.. He started calling me more often… We would talk sometimes.. Just as friends…. One day he said he wanted to see me, If I would meet him.. I said no I cant do that.. We cant do that.. I will talk to you sometimes over the phone, but that’s it. Its over between us, and I moved on… He said ok I understand…

Then Virgo purposed to me, I freaked out.. I said no!! I cant… I felt I still had feelings for Gem.. I then went to Gem, told him Virgo asked me to marry him.. I wanted to say STOP me please!! He just said oo that’s good congratulations. I kept saying Idk if I want to.. IDK what to do.. HE said you should marry him… You have been with him all this time, you cant just say no, he wont recover from it, and if you say no, he will be gone…

So I went back and told Virgo I would marry him after all ( ok putting head down in shame, again) So we got married.. We got married..

I still semi talked to Gem.. Then one day he called me and told me he ran into my friends the night before, and that he ended up hooking up with one of my friends… I said tell me who, or I will NEVER EVER speak to you again… So he said a name… The next day I changed my number, and didn’t speak or see him for 10 years… My “friends” NEVER told me!!!

So when we did reunite all the things, and anger we never said to each other came out.. lol

He said I came to you, when I became single, and u said Virgo was moving in.. What was I suppose to do about that!! I said you didn’t come to me with your heart, if you did, it would have been different.. you came saying “your single! “ I take that like your in party mode.. HE said well I guess we will never know…

I said yeah you hooked up with one of my friends, I didn’t want to hear that crap, so I changed my number, he said that’s WHY??? OMG he said I lied! I just wanted to get you jealous. I did see them, but I didn’t hook up with any of them.

He said we WERENT over but you went ahead and started dating Virgo, you fell for his lies, and his BS.. You should have waited for me.. I told you, I was going to be single soon.. I was just trying to get everything together.. I said Im not going to sit there and be someone’s mistress and wait for them to leave someone… They may never happen.. Either come now, or I have no choice but to move on.. You left me with no choice’s. I had to move on!

I said I went to you before I got married, you could have stopped me.. He said NO!! It was your choice to make, and u chose him! I said because you would have never committed to me, you were in party mode. He said you never know, what I would have done.. You didn’t want a commitment from me.. You weren’t looking for love….. He said IDK why you even got married! IT sure wasn’t for the right reason’s.

This went on like this for 4 months…. This is what we cant get past.. Also the trust issue’s we have with each other. Neither of us can get passed it…We tried.. We talked about ok the past is the past, lets drop it… We stopped talking about the past, but we just keep arguing about everything else…

Both of our guards are up… We have an underlying trust issues with each other… I don’t think either of us will ever be able to let the trust issue go.. I think its to deep in the psyche, it will always be there..

So again I’m feeling its best just to let him go…