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Author
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Topic: Casual relations for and opposed
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11nahyt
Knowflake Posts: 765
From: the future
Registered: Feb 2012
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posted June 24, 2013 08:15 PM
  
quote:
Originally posted by Kerosene:
I don't entirely agree, I started dating at a really young age, and I did experiment a little because naturally I was curious but it did not feel right. I started exploring my own sexuality.It's great you have finally have become aware of your sexuality and more power to you, you don't sound like a douche either. I do think some people regardless of age are aware of their own sexuality and the limits they are willing to go. Not sure about Ops circumstances.
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Kerosene
Knowflake Posts: 2629
From: Mercury
Registered: Dec 2012
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posted June 24, 2013 08:16 PM
Wow so many typos. Im on my phone guys...
I'm really sorry.
I hope you get the gest of what I'm saying ;pIP: Logged |
Geeky
Knowflake Posts: 348
From:
Registered: Dec 2012
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posted June 24, 2013 09:50 PM
quote:
Originally posted by meyray:
I dont want to play the gender card but I will go out on a limb and say that more men tend to practice it than women. me greatly.[/B]
I am a woman and I've had my share of casual. It's not as "okay" for us women to talk about it because we're instantly the "S" word or compared to prostitutes if we talk openly about enjoying sex. I personally don't care what people say about me so I freely share my thoughts/feelings on such matters, but many women are hindered by social expectations. ------------------
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11nahyt
Knowflake Posts: 765
From: the future
Registered: Feb 2012
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posted June 24, 2013 10:04 PM
I don't really get the whole "men are more promiscuous than women " thing. If the men in question are heterosexual, then it means they are RECIEVING sex from women. So the amount/percentage of promiscuous heterosexual people, would be the same. Not one more than the other. IP: Logged |
Geeky
Knowflake Posts: 348
From:
Registered: Dec 2012
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posted June 24, 2013 10:13 PM
quote:
Originally posted by 11nahyt:
I don't really get the whole "men are more promiscuous than women " thing. If the men in question are heterosexual, then it means they are RECIEVING sex from women. So the amount/percentage of promiscuous heterosexual people, would be the same. Not one more than the other.
^ yup IP: Logged |
StarlightSmileSupreme
Knowflake Posts: 1893
From: neptune
Registered: Nov 2012
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posted June 24, 2013 10:20 PM
quote:
Originally posted by 11nahyt:
I don't really get the whole "men are more promiscuous than women " thing. If the men in question are heterosexual, then it means they are RECIEVING sex from women. So the amount/percentage of promiscuous heterosexual people, would be the same. Not one more than the other.
It's about what it means to each gender more than what they are doing. What does the woman expect? And the man? Do they want the same thing or are many of the women wishing the guy would be theirs and they get very disappointed when that never happens? Are the men just interested in casual sex, and that's it? It's not about women's sexuality and oppression, more about what do each of the genders expect, in general? Of course, there's going to be people who do not fit the generality, there always are, but let's get a grasp on the majority of both genders. What is it they expect? I know some women want more than anything to have a ltr while guys are a bit more cautious. IP: Logged |
enchantress299
Knowflake Posts: 669
From:
Registered: May 2009
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posted June 24, 2013 10:28 PM
I think that sex without love is truly disingenuous to some people. Sex, inherently, is an act of love- it is the act of enjoying another person so immensely that you are letting someone get as close as another person can possibly be to you (inside you even). For some people, that is a very big act of trust. However, for some people, a body is a body, and I think that, just like in real life, people desecrate their bodies constantly (junk food, drugs, etc). Some people see sex as a release. Some people have more open boundaries. Some people prefer the emotional high of simply having someone in that moment to love them. Some people are fully physically engaged and care more about the sensation than anything else. Ultimately it comes down to what you value and what you can tolerate, and that varies for everyone. Personally, I've tried casual sex, and it wasn't my cup of tea (and I am older, so those who say getting older will make you more sexually open isn't necessarily true). I don't necessarily have to have a "soul mate" in order to have sex... I just want someone I can trust deeply and feel intimately connected to. That doesn't mean sex isn't fun on a shallow level too... I just don't care for that type of experience as much as I do one that is connected. Some people like distance. They feel safe with distance. I feel safe with connection. AND... I have the dreaded Venus square Uranus, which everyone says automatically means that you crave disconnection and distance. Not so in my case. I also have a Leo Mars, Virgo Sun/Venus, Aries Moon. Passionate honest connection is far more fulfilling for me than anything else. IP: Logged |
Kerosene
Knowflake Posts: 2629
From: Mercury
Registered: Dec 2012
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posted June 24, 2013 10:33 PM
quote:
Originally posted by StarlightSmileSupreme:
[QUOTE]Originally posted by 11nahyt:
[b]I don't really get the whole "men are more promiscuous than women " thing. If the men in question are heterosexual, then it means they are RECIEVING sex from women. So the amount/percentage of promiscuous heterosexual people, would be the same. Not one more than the other.
It's about what it means to each gender more than what they are doing. What does the woman expect? And the man? Do they want the same thing or are many of the women wishing the guy would be theirs and they get very disappointed when that never happens? Are the men just interested in casual sex, and that's it? It's not about women's sexuality and oppression, more about what do each of the genders expect, in general? Of course, there's going to be people who do not fit the generality, there always are, but let's get a grasp on the majority of both genders. What is it they expect? I know some women want more than anything to have a ltr while guys are a bit more cautious. [/B][/QUOTE]
exactly
It's just how men and women are generally designed. IP: Logged |
StarlightSmileSupreme
Knowflake Posts: 1893
From: neptune
Registered: Nov 2012
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posted June 24, 2013 10:37 PM
Kerosene - I agree. It could have a biological basis, too, like hormones women have and such. People need to realize men and women are just different. We aren't the same. IP: Logged |
lovemeruby
Knowflake Posts: 48
From:
Registered: Apr 2013
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posted June 24, 2013 11:40 PM
ok, I tried to rad most of these posts forgive me if Im repeating others...I have a two year old lol
My man (a cap) wants to have an open reltationship and we have one time...it is twisting my head up immensley because I am NOT OK with casual sex unless I want to suck someone's soul straight from them just to make myself feel better...I'm not that person and although I used to be at one point (briefly) I cant make my man happy about the open reltionship thing. Im disgusted it ever got that far. He still would like to be open (we have a long distance, VERY long term relationship) and Im freaking out at home with the child... I want him, not other people, I want to make him happy, so I forced myself to think inappropriately that way. Its nice to see I'm not alone in my morals, however the charts I have seen are not very closely related to mine... are we sure its an astrological thing? My family is very traditional on my moms side and although free-spirited on my dad's, they still do not go for that sort of lifestyle.
My mom's side of the family is weirdly mainly water signs and the other side is mainly fire. I was raised to be loyal, dysfunctional family or not.
I do have a little bit of Leo in my chart...how influential is that though? I see some posts say that Scorpio and Leo create the loyalty rationale. Makes lots of sense in my own mind...if your there for them then you are there 100%IP: Logged |
PixieJane
Knowflake Posts: 2493
From: CA
Registered: Oct 2010
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posted June 25, 2013 12:03 AM
quote:
Originally posted by 11nahyt:
I don't really get the whole "men are more promiscuous than women " thing. If the men in question are heterosexual, then it means they are RECIEVING sex from women. So the amount/percentage of promiscuous heterosexual people, would be the same. Not one more than the other.
Though worth noting, IMO, that men are much more likely to lie about having sex they never had (or at least exaggerate it) while women much more likely to lie about not having sex that they did have (or at least downplaying what happened). IP: Logged |
aquaguy91
Moderator Posts: 6797
From: tennessee
Registered: Jan 2012
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posted June 25, 2013 12:16 AM
quote:
Originally posted by 11nahyt:
I don't really get the whole "men are more promiscuous than women " thing. If the men in question are heterosexual, then it means they are RECIEVING sex from women. So the amount/percentage of promiscuous heterosexual people, would be the same. Not one more than the other.
Exactly..... But people don't want to hear the truth. I have seen plenty of women seek out guys who explicitly say they only want sex, but still it's all men's fault. Also If guys who actually want a relationship (guys like me) were really in demand I should have tons of dating options... But we all know how that is working out... IP: Logged |
PixieJane
Knowflake Posts: 2493
From: CA
Registered: Oct 2010
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posted June 25, 2013 12:37 AM
^^I've seen women who openly pursued casual sex. They didn't blame men save not living up to their hype, and sometimes for holding back not realizing that she really is just after sex with nothing else. And btw, men are not all clones anymore than women are. Just because most women want a relationship (and they do, just check out their magazines aimed at them, and the advertisements, that manage to stay in business despite their costs) doesn't mean that they'll form a relationship with just anyone. Hopefully you wouldn't form a relationship with the first woman who showed she was willing either, it takes more than just a desire to be with someone to make it work. Because Fred is different from Ted, and not all women want Fred, not all want Ted. IP: Logged |
11nahyt
Knowflake Posts: 765
From: the future
Registered: Feb 2012
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posted June 25, 2013 12:50 AM
quote:
Originally posted by StarlightSmileSupreme:
[QUOTE]Originally posted by 11nahyt:
[b]I don't really get the whole "men are more promiscuous than women " thing. If the men in question are heterosexual, then it means they are RECIEVING sex from women. So the amount/percentage of promiscuous heterosexual people, would be the same. Not one more than the other.
It's about what it means to each gender more than what they are doing. What does the woman expect? And the man? Do they want the same thing or are many of the women wishing the guy would be theirs and they get very disappointed when that never happens? Are the men just interested in casual sex, and that's it?
[/B][/QUOTE]
Edit**
I get what you're saying...but I was talking about two promiscuous people having casual sex. Like one night stands, random no strings attatched sex,etc. Also,if the female chooses to have sex with a guy, when she KNOWS from the get that its simply casual, no strings attatched sex for the guy, yet she still has sex with him hoping she "gets the guy", how is that still not casual sex? What is it then? if you know the person you're going to have sex with is treating the whole thing in a casual manner, then why Try to expect more than the obvious? The guy has no ulterior motive in that scenario. She does. Promiscuous people who seek casual sex, expect nothing more, but casual sex. IP: Logged |
asclibrasagsun
Knowflake Posts: 1727
From: Mδlmo, Sweden
Registered: Aug 2012
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posted June 25, 2013 01:03 AM
I think that sex is a very delicate matter and it is meant to be shared with the one you love, this is the truly the only way to achieve harmony and pleasure through sex, if it is shared with the one you love. IMO, casual sex does not have the same spiritual aspect or benefits that loving sex does. I am not saying it is wrong or nasty, it just is what it is and certainly does not feature the component of warmth that amorous committed sexual relationships bring, casual sex is just plain screwing after which you can only experience emptiness and disgust (if you do it and you realize that it is something which is not for your at all).
too often today people are sharing their bodies for absolutely no reason and without meaning, it seems like nothing is sacred anymore... this is so sad
Choose wisely...IP: Logged |
somethingexcellent
Knowflake Posts: 1396
From: walking with my head in the clouds!
Registered: Nov 2012
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posted June 25, 2013 01:05 AM
quote:
11nahyt: So the amount/percentage of promiscuous heterosexual people, would be the same. Not one more than the other.
That's actually not necessarily true. People may have sex under the pretense of something serious then leave the other person high and dry. Say it was a man deceiving a woman, then he'd contribute to a higher number of promiscuous men. Same in vice versa. IP: Logged |
Kerosene
Knowflake Posts: 2629
From: Mercury
Registered: Dec 2012
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posted June 25, 2013 01:05 AM
I don't think she ment all women aren't looking for casual sex but many women like op for example are looking for serious relationships.It's less common to find men who are like you and aquaguy.
Don't you hang around guys ever? lol IP: Logged |
MsPrism
Knowflake Posts: 48
From:
Registered: Jun 2013
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posted June 25, 2013 01:05 AM
quote:
Originally posted by meyray:
So my question is what in a persons chart can makes them dogmatically opposed to casual sex and what can make them practice it?
Heya! I've wondered that myself. For me, I cannot have casual sex (I've tried. . .lol funny story) and I've narrowed it to my ascendant and 8th House ruled by Mars with Mars sitting in Aquarius which can be quite objective about sex. Then Pluto sits in my 7th House being the co-ruler to my 8th House. The first time I had sex was with a man I married a few months later. *shrug* With that 11th House Aquarius Mars, I also tend to meet lovers online first, pretty interesting!  One partner of mine was ashamed of how much casual sex he had when he was younger (about 15 to 20). He was very well-endowed and felt that others had used him just for sex, which he was very good at and needed often. He had the Sun and Mars in 8th House Virgo. Since Virgo is our service to the world and the 8th House is actual sex, it can make for someone that services others sexually. Others might have viewed him this way because the 6th house (naturally Virgo) is the house of servants, where you serve others who sit at a higher position than yourself. I hope that made sense! IP: Logged |
somethingexcellent
Knowflake Posts: 1396
From: walking with my head in the clouds!
Registered: Nov 2012
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posted June 25, 2013 01:09 AM
quote:
aquaguy91: I have seen plenty of women seek out guys who explicitly say they only want sex, but still it's all men's fault.
Men are more often attributed for having sex, then disappearing the next day. Is it true? In my experience and observation, yes. IP: Logged |
aquaguy91
Moderator Posts: 6797
From: tennessee
Registered: Jan 2012
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posted June 25, 2013 01:24 AM
quote:
Originally posted by Kerosene:
I don't think she ment all women aren't looking for casual sex but many women like op for example are looking for serious relationships.It's less common to find men who are like you and aquaguy.
Don't you hang around guys ever? lol
I know this wasn't directed at me but yes, I have lots of guy friends and some of them are players. And you know what? The girls bend over a** backwards to get with my player friends.. One time one of my friends was juggling 2 girls at once and 1 of the girls found out and you know what she did? Went in the other room and had sex with the guy she had just found out cheated on her, I was there and saw it with my own eyes and that's just one example... We can sit and try to make excuses all night but at some point we have to realize women are responsible too because they enable These guys.The old saying " fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me" definitely applies.
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lovemeruby
Knowflake Posts: 48
From:
Registered: Apr 2013
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posted June 25, 2013 01:32 AM
As a woman...and Im shooting myself in the foot here, we are better liars and manipulators when we want to be. Its easily turned off and on at the expense of anyone...A great woman knows she is capable of this and will use that knowledge for inspiration instead of manipulation. A very insecure woman will play to her hearts content and a cleverly bored women will do the same just for entertainment. OR if she is intelligent and insecure, she will just chat over coffee and not go out to fill some empty hole.IP: Logged |
Kerosene
Knowflake Posts: 2629
From: Mercury
Registered: Dec 2012
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posted June 25, 2013 01:50 AM
aquaguy
No one is saying casual sex is bad, they were all consenting adults.
The girls were sexually empowered and the guys as you claimed were players, so no one was taking advantage of anyone. Most dudes of them are looking for hookups and they pretend to date you just to have instant gratification. Just the way most men tick.
I sort of decided to tease those dudes that are obviously looking for a hookup and close the door on their face, just for my own amusement.
The problem is guys separate people as sex partners and wifey material.
Sorta what happened to Jodi Arias, hmmmm Actually the farthest I have ever gone was with a girl because we were both emotionally ready and were really close. It was actually a really beautiful thing but strange things happened and things just fell apart. It was no ones fault thou, I really do wonder about that often.. I should just go straight... Idk why I even bother Sorry op..
I'm done with this subject
Were totally derailing her thread and it has nothing to do with gender relations.
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