posted May 25, 2019 05:19 PM            

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Originally posted by vansio:
Hi I want to add my two cents. Virgos I know (and I know a lot – IC sign, both parents, etc) have narcissistic tendencies they hide behind angelic demeanors. The crutch being self-satisfaction for splitting their identities into herd mentalities, at the cost of shadow integration. As someone mentioned earlier, fooled by the “humble brag” - they don’t recognize it *at all*. Gets them in much emotional trouble under pressure to react authentically. Similar vein would be how Pisces have cruel (god-complex) social tendencies presented as ethereal or more likely waywardness. This axis represents sadomasochism.

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Anybody who pays attention to my posts would know I have started countless posts were I celebrate other signs and the strengths of other signs, the moment I do it for myself after over a decade of posting on this forum I am bragging. Humility means you don't see yourself superior to others and can see the value of others something I do daily, constantly pointing out to others their strengths and what makes them special. Me seeing my own strengths and what makes me special does not make me a narcissist, it means I have self-worth and usually the focus is noticing other's strengths and building others up for me, its healthy for me to do it for myself too every once in a while like god forbid I have done in this thread lol but you can make assumptions about my shadow side. We all have a shadow side and I am very aware of mine and how mine shows up in my life and narcissistic tendencies is not it. I have sun square neptune and moon in pisces square neptune and I definitely dont have a god complex either, people are responsible for themselves and I have no business judging anybody.

posted May 25, 2019 05:21 PM            

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Originally posted by ChildofVenus:
The one I know is a piece of work lol. He's a handful and I do mean a [b]HANDFUL but I know I can be too I know it's our rough synastry lol. I love him though I trust him and he's there for me when I really need him. He's definately not perfect even though he's a perfectionist. He does have great qualities though I think he has a good heart.[/B]

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posted May 25, 2019 06:04 PM            

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Originally posted by Dumuzi:
i imagine that's a heavy job after a while, i'm sure it is hard on you, people tend to come to me to unload emotionally and i can find that overwhelming after a little while but i can run away from it and clear my head you can't and they expect more

feeling better now at least?

just cycling with no particular catalyst? i occasionally experience overwhelming depression for a little while, but i imagine it has to do with the fact that i bury everything and at one point or another i can't keep it down

it passes quick enough in my case and takes a while to come back, usually i just have to tell myself i can always wait a day then kill myself if i feel like it still and that's comforting enough lol no **** though, i find comfort in the idea of being able to control that if i wanted to

that's an intense moon in your chart, sounds hard to deal with, water in general tends to make me feel that way looking at a chart though

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Yes much better, just needed to rest and decompress. I am going to quit my pt second job and just focus on the business and my full time job, this will help a lot.

People work through stuff at a safe pace, it sounds like those boats of depression are more like stuff surfacing and you working through it and then putting it away until you are strong enough to let it come to the surface again, go there and make more progress. When you avoid thinking of stuff it can have a rebound effect though, its better to let yourself think of it but create some distance from it (detachment), sounds like you do that! You practice detachment and acceptance and is probably why you bounce back quickly.

posted May 26, 2019 02:42 PM            

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Originally posted by AriesLilith:
I have Virgo AC, and can relate to being humble. Deep down my Aries stellium can feel confident and proud but in the overall my humbleness comes from realizing that my perspective and knowledge is as subjective as anyone’s and I can be wrong too. We also have different talents so I can be good at some things and bad at some just like everyone else.

Thought I did not notice much about myself being humble until once a coworker pointed it out. It also made me realize how people notice little things.

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Its interesting bc when that person started talking about Virgos been narcissists, I thought of all the Virgo risers I have met over the years and how they are the opposite of narcissists and pretty humble and down to earth even the ones who can be picky about organization and been neat and clean. The examples that popped in my head immediately were virgo risers, yes they definitely are humble and carry that energy in how they carry themselves. Its sweet and refreshing.

posted May 26, 2019 02:50 PM            

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Originally posted by StubbornVirgo:
I've never met a narcissistic Virgo, tbh. The vast majority of Virgos that I know are kind and compassionate. Even our picky, OCD traits, when utilized in the right way, has a humanitarian bent to it. Everything is done in the spirit of helping another person, not hurting. Being selfish and self-centered goes directly against the ego of a Virgo.

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posted May 26, 2019 05:56 PM            

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Originally posted by StubbornVirgo:
I've never met a narcissistic Virgo, tbh. The vast majority of Virgos that I know are kind and compassionate. Even our picky, OCD traits, when utilized in the right way, has a humanitarian bent to it. Everything is done in the spirit of helping another person, not hurting. Being selfish and self-centered goes directly against the ego of a Virgo.

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posted May 28, 2019 10:16 AM            

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Originally posted by hypatia238:
Yes much better, just needed to rest and decompress. I am going to quit my pt second job and just focus on the business and my full time job, this will help a lot.

People work through stuff at a safe pace, it sounds like those boats of depression are more like stuff surfacing and you working through it and then putting it away until you are strong enough to let it come to the surface again, go there and make more progress. When you avoid thinking of stuff it can have a rebound effect though, its better to let yourself think of it but create some distance from it (detachment), sounds like you do that! You practice detachment and acceptance and is probably why you bounce back quickly.

I have gotten good at managing my mood swings I feel but part of it is accepting that this is part of my journey and how I am wired, I also experience joy more deeply. Certain natural remedies really help too in addition to coping skills but I have always have been pretty functional in spite of the ups and downs.

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glad you're doing better, that sounds like a lot of hectic stressful **** all at once, not surprising you're burnt out

well the thing is if im going to think about something or feel it it's just going to happen but i can also tell myself "well this is pointless" and push past a lot of ****

my feelings don't typically crack me is what i mean

that's all you really can do is accept it and move on, the joy part balances it out at least

late reply and not much, sorry about that, i've spent this past idk week or so high the entire time i've been awake

just weed but yeah

posted May 28, 2019 11:44 AM            

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Originally posted by Dumuzi:

well the thing is if im going to think about something or feel it it's just going to happen but i can also tell myself "well this is pointless" and push past a lot of ****

my feelings don't typically crack me is what i mean

that's all you really can do is accept it and move on, the joy part balances it out at least

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posted May 28, 2019 12:51 PM            

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Originally posted by vansio:
Hi I want to add my two cents. Virgos I know (and I know a lot – IC sign, both parents, etc) have narcissistic tendencies they hide behind angelic demeanors. The crutch being self-satisfaction for splitting their identities into herd mentalities, at the cost of shadow integration. As someone mentioned earlier, fooled by the “humble brag” - they don’t recognize it *at all*. Gets them in much emotional trouble under pressure to react authentically. Similar vein would be how Pisces have cruel (god-complex) social tendencies presented as ethereal or more likely waywardness. This axis represents sadomasochism.

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i wouldn't say i was narcissistic, but people do tend to view me in a way that's not in line with reality

i joke a lot about there being a portrait of me somewhere that looks my age and like it's done all the **** i've actually done

there's a quality about me that can come off the way you're describing that people respond to in person that's been useful to say the least

calling me narcissistic would be pushing it, but the reality definitely can surprise people sometimes

posted May 28, 2019 02:22 PM            

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Originally posted by hypatia238:
^You know I have a big issue with this word as a mental health provider, I feel it gets grossly misused even in my profession at times and talk about a personality disorder that gets overly diagnosed. I feel people like to throw that word around a little too much, and it starts to lose its meaning. Dumuzi you are extremely open about your issues and don't hide in this air of superiority that makes it impossible for you to own your issues and see your flaws bc your ego cannot handle it. You do not come off as narcissistic to me but actually you seem very down to earth.

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yeah i don't care how it's become this blanket word for "people who do **** i don't like" like it's a catch all phrase rather than a very specific issue, so i get the issue there (though to be fair they did say "narcissistic tendencies" rather than full blown narcissism, and displaying some narcissistic traits is common whereas having enough of them to be a narcissist isn't)

narcissism has very clear defining characteristics and someone not being the best person or even ****** in some ways just isn't the same

i totally agree with you there, which is why i'm like "narcissism would be pushing it" but the flipside is that i know my demeanor and appearance etc does make it so that people are genuinely shocked when i talk about certain aspects of my life and **** i've done etc when i'm not open or before i'm actually able to be open in person people tend to treat me in a certain manner that i can find vaguely amusing

the darker side of things tends to come as a surprise, so i get what they mean to some extent about having a certain aura that can disguise things for some people

i'm aware of that sort of duality between what's on the surface and what is, and it's worked for me when my drug use was at its worst and **** so i understand what they were getting at with that comment

i think it wasn't necessarily the best word choice, but i get where they're coming from

posted May 28, 2019 05:12 PM            

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Originally posted by Dumuzi:
yeah i don't care how it's become this blanket word for "people who do **** i don't like" like it's a catch all phrase rather than a very specific issue, so i get the issue there (though to be fair they did say "narcissistic tendencies" rather than full blown narcissism, and displaying some narcissistic traits is common whereas having enough of them to be a narcissist isn't)

narcissism has very clear defining characteristics and someone not being the best person or even ****** in some ways just isn't the same

i totally agree with you there, which is why i'm like "narcissism would be pushing it" but the flipside is that i know my demeanor and appearance etc does make it so that people are genuinely shocked when i talk about certain aspects of my life and **** i've done etc when i'm not open or before i'm actually able to be open in person people tend to treat me in a certain manner that i can find vaguely amusing

the darker side of things tends to come as a surprise, so i get what they mean to some extent about having a certain aura that can disguise things for some people

i'm aware of that sort of duality between what's on the surface and what is, and it's worked for me when my drug use was at its worst and **** so i understand what they were getting at with that comment

i think it wasn't necessarily the best word choice, but i get where they're coming from

the whole need for superiority is lost on me though lol i don't give a **** if there's better people than me and everyone knows it

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The thing is that duality is something everyone struggles with bc we all have a shadow side and different parts of us (there is an entire branch of psychology dedicated to this called parts psychology/internal family system). We all have an 8th and 12th house, parts of us we don't show to others that we learn to hide and only show to certain people. We all have contradictions too, almost everyone has at least one opposition in their chart or squares (those are different parts of us that are struggling to express themselves in an integrated way) so I don't attribute this to been a virgo, it is human nature.

Also a lot of virgos that have narcissistic traits probably have some leo in them but is interesting how virgo is one of those signs people like to project negative traits too. I am fairly certain that true narcissism shows up in all the signs, every time I check out the chart of someone who is supposed to be narcissistic I don't see a pattern with the sign virgo. Virgo is often associated with jobs that deal with providing a service and that its not conducive to narcissistic traits, positions of power would go well with narcissism...

Just last week my co-workers were telling me I should become a professor and lead my own research team bc I am always coming up with research ideas etc...I don't like the idea of been in charge of a team at all, I don't want to be the boss. I like been my own boss, I like the idea of managing a small business for myself, something were I mainly do most of the work with another partner were we are equals type of thing, but been in charge of a research team or big corporation or anything like that, is not me at all. I want to be in the background leading, influencing people in a positive way quietly. I remember as a kid the idea of been famous was super unattractive to me, how many kids think like that? I just wanted to be middle class and not be in the spotlight, I hated stuck up people since I was a kid too and I wanted to help poor children...

posted May 28, 2019 06:57 PM            

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Originally posted by teasel:
I don't like blanket use of words like that, either. I use them when they're appropriate, though. When this woman visited us in California, she thought she had a friend visiting. Instead, this woman openly admitted that she wasn't really there to socialize, that we were a convenient and free place to stay in California, so that she could vacation. Then she hit on my dad, twice, in front of my mother, when they were driving somewhere. She was more concerned with spending her money on pretty underwear, than looking after her kids. A family friend dubbed her The Underwear Queen.

The sociopath - too much to go into. If you've seen Dirty John, he was similar to him.

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posted May 28, 2019 07:12 PM            

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Originally posted by hypatia238:


Teasel you have mentioned her before and I agree with you about her, she sounds AWFUL, I would never disrespect anyone like that but I don't know if is fair to blame this on her been a virgo, can you post her full chart?. If a virgo is interested in a married man they typically would be very discreet, not like you are describing her, they wouldn't blatantly flirt in front of the wife with the man of interest. Virgo is a shy introverted energy who is attentive to detail so they would avoid setting off obvious alarms, she sounds like the opposite of subtle and discreet. Also, I am a virgo and married man turn me OFF personally, I genuinely lose attraction for a guy if he is married, I like my man single and very available. If a guy is a workaholic it turns me off, bc the job is who they are married to and I become the mistress and I am not interested in unavailable man in any way shape or form.

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