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Author Topic:   The Beauty of Virgo
teasel
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posted May 28, 2019 07:17 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for teasel     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I've also hated the blanket use of BPD being used as a way to diagnose people, so I was glad to see that it was re-classified recently, as part of the PTSD grouping in psychology. I don't have BPD, but I have an aunt who kept throwing around diagnoses where I was concerned, and I'm surprised she didn't go there. This is the woman who totally ignored my begging her for help during the first year that things got bad at home. She wouldn't listen to what was going on.

I also know a guy who lives on relationship boards, and loves to diagnose everyone's "problem partners" with BPD. Doesn't matter what's going on, the partner has BPD, and nothing will get better until they get help. Never mind that he's only hearing one side of the story. Now he's going to have to think about the fact that BPD happens due to trauma, and is associated with PTSD (which I recognized when I was researching them, seven years ago), instead of making them out to be monsters.

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hypatia238
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From: Mercury novile and parallel Pluto, Pluto septile Southnode
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posted May 28, 2019 09:22 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for hypatia238     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by teasel:
I've also hated the blanket use of BPD being used as a way to diagnose people, so I was glad to see that it was re-classified recently, as part of the PTSD grouping in psychology. I don't have BPD, but I have an aunt who kept throwing around diagnoses where I was concerned, and I'm surprised she didn't go there. This is the woman who totally ignored my begging her for help during the first year that things got bad at home. She wouldn't listen to what was going on.

I also know a guy who lives on relationship boards, and loves to diagnose everyone's "problem partners" with BPD. Doesn't matter what's going on, the partner has BPD, and nothing will get better until they get help. Never mind that he's only hearing one side of the story. Now he's going to have to think about the fact that BPD happens due to trauma, and is associated with PTSD (which I recognized when I was researching them, seven years ago), instead of making them out to be monsters.


Wow Teasel I am really enjoying your posts a lot lately. I am glad you are speaking up more about things that matter to you, you have a lot of great information/knowledge to share, I want more .

I can see you have done your research on this and looked into this seriously. What is it about scorpio risers and the DSM, this guy I knew who was a scorpio riser read the entire DSM and memorized the whole thing, impressive, I use to really enjoy hearing his feedback about anything related to psychology. I can see you have researched the DSM very well too, I love having conversations of this nature btw, we can talk for hours, its my favorite!

I am 100% with you, its a huge pet peeve of mine but yes I feel that BPD is OVERLY diagnosed definitely and I feel people need to lean towards the side of caution and actually try to avoid diagnosing people with this. If this is done they might actually diagnose people correctly more. Its sad but when I hear people have been diagnosed with BPD I am immediately skeptical the diagnosis is valid/accurate.

Bipolar is another that gets thrown around a lot, no a mood disorder does not automatically mean bipolar.

I am sorry your aunt was not supportive when you needed her the most, that always breaks my heart.

"Now he's going to have to think about the fact that BPD happens due to trauma, and is associated with PTSD (which I recognized when I was researching them, seven years ago), instead of making them out to be monsters."

It makes sense it stems from trauma, I am glad too it was re-categorized.

"Never mind that he's only hearing one side of the story." OMG the longer I do what I do the more blatantly obvious it becomes that is crucial to hear all sides of the story.

Teasel why don't you go back to school and get a psychology degree? You definitely have an affinity for it and the passion for it.


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Dumuzi
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From: degenerate#5188
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posted May 29, 2019 01:00 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Dumuzi     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by hypatia238:
The thing is that duality is something everyone struggles with bc we all have a shadow side and different parts of us (there is an entire branch of psychology dedicated to this called parts psychology/internal family system). We all have an 8th and 12th house, parts of us we don't show to others that we learn to hide and only show to certain people. We all have contradictions too, almost everyone has at least one opposition in their chart or squares (those are different parts of us that are struggling to express themselves in an integrated way) so I don't attribute this to been a virgo, it is human nature.

Also a lot of virgos that have narcissistic traits probably have some leo in them but is interesting how virgo is one of those signs people like to project negative traits too. I am fairly certain that true narcissism shows up in all the signs, every time I check out the chart of someone who is supposed to be narcissistic I don't see a pattern with the sign virgo. Virgo is often associated with jobs that deal with providing a service and that its not conducive to narcissistic traits, positions of power would go well with narcissism...

Just last week my co-workers were telling me I should become a professor and lead my own research team bc I am always coming up with research ideas etc...I don't like the idea of been in charge of a team at all, I don't want to be the boss. I like been my own boss, I like the idea of managing a small business for myself, something were I mainly do most of the work with another partner were we are equals type of thing, but been in charge of a research team or big corporation or anything like that, is not me at all. I want to be in the background leading, influencing people in a positive way quietly. I remember as a kid the idea of been famous was super unattractive to me, how many kids think like that? I just wanted to be middle class and not be in the spotlight, I hated stuck up people since I was a kid too and I wanted to help poor children...

Anyhoo.....


i wouldn't say i struggled with it, if anything i find it convenient because it makes my life easier and i can understand how someone might interpret that the way that they mentioned (i think in my case sun trine neptune probably would add to that)

other people perceiving me that way is a good thing, internally i'm not bothered by it

there's a lot of occult work that requires digging through your shadow and **** too, because everyone has one yes, but they're all different and a person's relationship with their shadow is important

i've done a lot of shadow work, i know my shadow well, and i'm cool with it

psychology and the occult come together nicely when you look at jung in particular

to be fair providing service can be narcissistic if providing service serves a function the narcissist requires to portray themselves in a certain light or to seek admiration, just throwing that out there, so i wouldn't say that trait is necessarily one that cancels everything else out

leo placements might help with that yeah

people do project a lot of negativity onto virgos, but it makes sense, a critical person invites criticism simply by being that way themselves

when people feel like you're hyperfocused and "judging" (even though judgement is totally separate than noticing flaws, the distinction isn't observed as much as it should be) then they hold you under a microscope in turn whether it's fair or more harsh or whatever

so i think a lot of the more negative projections and the overblown criticisms with virgo as a sign (but a lot of signs suffer from that sort of thing) come from that

i'm not a fan of being in charge of anyone or having anyone in charge of me either, i find both sides of that annoying

my first life goal as a kid professional thief i was like 4 years old hiding behind toys practicing picking locks and pick pocketing my mother **** like that lol older than that i didn't really think about it

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hypatia238
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From: Mercury novile and parallel Pluto, Pluto septile Southnode
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posted May 29, 2019 01:26 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for hypatia238     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
"to be fair providing service can be narcissistic if providing service serves a function the narcissist requires to portray themselves in a certain light or to seek admiration, just throwing that out there, so i wouldn't say that trait is necessarily one that cancels everything else out"

I don't think people become waiters, clerks, receptionists or secretaries to seek admiration and to be fair everyone likes been admired, this does not mean one is narcissistic, like I said a key part of it its thinking you are superior to others and not seeing others as equals to you. I cannot imagine anyone choosing a career purely to be admired, you have to have a genuine interest, affinity and passion for it.

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hypatia238
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From: Mercury novile and parallel Pluto, Pluto septile Southnode
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posted May 29, 2019 01:29 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for hypatia238     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Dumuzi:
i wouldn't say i struggled with it, if anything i find it convenient because it makes my life easier and i can understand how someone might interpret that the way that they mentioned (i think in my case sun trine neptune probably would add to that)

I didn't say you struggle with anything, I was talking in very general terms. I think all humans struggle with issues bc nobody is perfect and we all have to figure out what our shadow side is and learn to channel it in a positive way. I was pointing out in general how oppositions and squares point to those areas we need to master and to different sides in us that conflict each other.

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Dumuzi
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From: degenerate#5188
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posted May 29, 2019 02:06 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Dumuzi     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by hypatia238:

I don't think people become waiters, clerks, receptionists or secretaries to seek admiration and to be fair everyone likes been admired, this does not mean one is narcissistic, like I said a key part of it its thinking you are superior to others and not seeing others as equals to you. I cannot imagine anyone choosing a career purely to be admired, you have to have a genuine interest, affinity and passion for it.

to be fair people don't typically have any of those jobs that you listed unless they're in a situation where they have no higher level education or real options have a kid young or some **** etc those aren't at all passion jobs or jobs people have genuine intetest in

it's not a matter of just admiration though, which isn't what i said anyway what i said is when it can serve someone's purpose to seem giving then they can be giving and put themselves in a position of providing, not all narcissists have high level jobs anyway

narcissism isn't just about admiration (does anyone admire waitresses and secretaries though? not knocking the jobs just being real here) and providing service doesnt just serve for admiration, seeming like a good or humble person is useful if you're doing other **** underneath that

people choose careers for all kinds of reasons and plenty of those reasons are void of passion

my fiancee's brother grew up with this kid whose mother barely fed her kids, beat them, mentally abused them etc and she was a nurse not because of passion or having an affinity for caretaking but because it was something she could get certified in and people find it respectable etc

nursing is a career that's legit full of people who lack passion and don't give a **** lol the whole medical industry is loaded in that

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Dumuzi
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From: degenerate#5188
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posted May 29, 2019 02:16 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Dumuzi     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by hypatia238:
I didn't say you struggle with anything, I was talking in very general terms. I think all humans struggle with issues bc nobody is perfect and we all have to figure out what our shadow side is and learn to channel it in a positive way. I was pointing out in general how oppositions and squares point to those areas we need to master and to different sides in us that conflict each other.

got you, my bad

though i don't see an internal struggle of parts as the same as what they were talking about, which came off more like talk about a mask

the shadow underneath is there yeah, but the outer layer that people see is what i assumed was the focus of that

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hypatia238
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From: Mercury novile and parallel Pluto, Pluto septile Southnode
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posted May 29, 2019 02:32 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for hypatia238     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Dumuzi:

nursing is a career that's legit full of people who lack passion and don't give a **** lol the whole medical industry is loaded in that


That is sadly very true. There are people who have calling and passion for it and those are great nurses, good at their job, not those robots you speak up who don't care and are just doing it for the money.

But my point is that everyone enjoys been admired, is human nature so that does not mean you are narcissistic, its the combination of feeling superior to others and lacking empathy for others that is a big red flag.

As for been a waitress, secretary, clerk ect there are people that enjoy jobs of that nature, that like to be of help or serve and be behind the scenes and don't want a ton of responsibility or to be in charge.

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hypatia238
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From: Mercury novile and parallel Pluto, Pluto septile Southnode
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posted May 29, 2019 02:37 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for hypatia238     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Dumuzi:
got you, my bad

though i don't see an internal struggle of parts as the same as what they were talking about, which came off more like talk about a mask

the shadow underneath is there yeah, but the outer layer that people see is what i assumed was the focus of that


In therapy there is this creative exercise called "the mask" therapists sometimes have clients engage in. Basically its to help bring to light how we have a social personal and an internal world/private self and what parts of us we show to the world and what parts we keep to ourselves, in line with the whole MC versus IC. I feel we all wear a mask is what I am saying, I don't feel is a virgo thing. Also think about how we all have an ascendant.

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Dumuzi
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posted May 29, 2019 04:37 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Dumuzi     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by hypatia238:
That is sadly very true. There are people who have calling and passion for it and those are great nurses, good at their job, not those robots you speak up who don't care and are just doing it for the money.

But my point is that everyone enjoys been admired, is human nature so that does not mean you are narcissistic, [b]its the combination of feeling superior to others and lacking empathy for others that is a big red flag.

As for been a waitress, secretary, clerk ect there are people that enjoy jobs of that nature, that like to be of help or serve and be behind the scenes and don't want a ton of responsibility or to be in charge. [/B]


well yeah of course, but plenty aren't that's why i found it surprising that you said that like everyone chooses careers because they care when i can think of so many where that hasn't been the case and met even more who make it clear they're not

my initial point wasn't entirely about admiration though and also doing good things because you're seeking admiration isn't the same as doing them because you care and also receive admiration for them

like ok before i got to know one of my friends i initially did her a favor and helped her out at work because i wanted to **** her and didnt know she wasn't single etc it wasn't about being nice or helpful, it was actively about staying late, interacting with her, and opening up a chance to talk

i wouldn't count that as me being nice because i wasn't doing it to be nice, i just did something nice with an ulterior motive and internal motivation means a lot and makes a huge difference

to do something for admiration isnt the same as receiving admiration for doing something you would've done regardless

sure most people like compliments, and that isn't narcissistic but that's not really what i meant by that

i had a roommate who liked collecting people who were down on their luck and in **** positions so he could tell people how much he did for them and parade them around, guy only actually cared about himself (he wasn't a virgo but idk all his placements), collected a lot of rescue animals to show off too

lack of empathy is a definining characteristic yeah, and the feelings of superiority is a grey area very often narcissists have that internalized negative self image thing going on that's underneath all the denial and superiority

people who like jobs of that nature prefer whichever **** job they can get out of all the other low level **** jobs they could have

my point is most waitresses don't want to be waitresses and you don't hear kids dreaming about doing it either

i worked in a kitchen, met plenty of waitresses when i did, your average waitress hates her job and even the ones who "like" it have mostly gotten stuck doing it because things they'd rather be doing have passed them by

it's not exactly a passion job, and the most passion a lot of them tend to feel is about how much they dislike people they have to serve and pretend to like

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Dumuzi
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posted May 29, 2019 04:43 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Dumuzi     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by hypatia238:
In therapy there is this creative exercise called "the mask" therapists sometimes have clients engage in. Basically its to help bring to light how we have a social personal and an internal world/private self and what parts of us we show to the world and what parts we keep to ourselves, in line with the whole MC versus IC. I feel we all wear a mask is what I am saying, I don't feel is a virgo thing. Also think about how we all have an ascendant.

i assumed the mask being "angelic" was what they meant about virgo specifically

everyone has their masks sure, but not everyone's mask is the same

i find my ascendant more easy to identify with than my sun personally

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StubbornVirgo
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From: Welcome to Mercury
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posted May 30, 2019 02:29 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for StubbornVirgo     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Dumuzi:
my fiancee's brother grew up with this kid whose mother barely fed her kids, beat them, mentally abused them etc and she was a nurse not because of passion or having an affinity for caretaking but because it was something she could get certified in and people find it respectable etc

nursing is a career that's legit full of people who lack passion and don't give a **** lol the whole medical industry is loaded in that


I have to disagree with you. Your example is the minority, and in no way the majority. I am a nurse who knows tons of nurses, nursing aides, doctors, etc. and they're all passionate about their jobs and the care that they provide. I don't know of anybody that comes even close to resembling your example.

Sorry, but our profession gets enough of a bad rep and does not get the respect that it deserves. So I have to stand up for nursing when I see stuff like this. Please don't paint all of the healthcare field with your subjective experiences. Consider that there are plenty of great healthcare workers out there who do their job every day because they enjoy helping people and want to make a positive difference in the world. I am consistently and pleasantly surprised by the amount of compassion and consideration that I encounter in my field. I'm sorry that your experiences have been different, but rest assured that there are plenty of nurses who still genuinely care about their patients and the care that they provide.

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StubbornVirgo
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posted May 30, 2019 02:31 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for StubbornVirgo     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by hypatia238:
That is sadly very true. There are people who have calling and passion for it and those are great nurses, good at their job, not those robots you speak up who don't care and are just doing it for the money.

But my point is that everyone enjoys been admired, is human nature so that does not mean you are narcissistic, [b]its the combination of feeling superior to others and lacking empathy for others that is a big red flag.

As for been a waitress, secretary, clerk ect there are people that enjoy jobs of that nature, that like to be of help or serve and be behind the scenes and don't want a ton of responsibility or to be in charge. [/B]


Thank you for detailing the differences. It irritates me to no end when people broadly use the term "narcissism" in cases and examples that just don't fit.

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Dumuzi
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From: degenerate#5188
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posted May 30, 2019 06:58 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Dumuzi     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
@StubbornVirgo

you can disagree with me, but i know multiple people who fit that example, and i've heard the same from a friend who works in a dementia ward and many other people (and i don't doubt location can play a factor, never pretended otherwise)

i've also been in the hospital a fair amount etc and know plenty of people who tell everyone who doesnt know what to do with their life to get into the medical field because "money"

did i say that's all of them? of course not, but i'd be lying if i said that wasn't plenty of the nurses i've personally encountered (if we're talking majority i've met then i'd say overworked, tired, and the sort of people you can only ever feel lukewarm about because nothing was terrible or good about them) and know other people who can say the same

you feeling like you have to disagree due to deeply bias personal motives doesn't change my experiences (and i'm not pretending to know yours or anyone you know) and that all being said i never said "the majority of nurses" i said it was a profession that draws in a lot of people like that because a good deal of medical professions do draw in dispassionate people the same as teaching

saying a lot of people who arent passionate choose professions like that isn't the same as saying the majority of people in those professions are that type of person anyway

you aren't really proving anything by "standing up for nursing" here because i said nothing negative about the job as a whole and it was pointless to mention good nurses i know/encounter because that had nothing to do with the context of what was being spoken about (the fact that plenty of people, not just nurses) and i didn't paint "all of the healthcare field" (in the extreme "everyone" sense not the fact that there are a shitload of jobs within the field and it's one dispassionate people flock to) as anything so you telling me to "please" refrain from something i haven't done is pointless

i'm sorry you took it to some personal place me saying people can have entire careers they arent passionate about and used an example you disliked, but that's not my assessment of the entirety of any group and i don't make judgement calls where i pretend to know the entirety of anything so it's kind of ******** you putting those words in my mouth and unfairly assessing me like i'm that sort of person

when i mean an entire field or a majority of something i use those words, if i didn't then i don't mean that and if i'm not discussing all "thw good ones" for balance it's because they're not part of the conversation and it would be pointlessly out of context

i never didn't consider that and i do know quite a few nurses who aren't **** and have encountered a handful of good ones outside of that but what did they have to do with the point i was making that i should bring them up when i never said "all" i said **** like "i've met plenty" which is true, but a lot doesn't even mean majority when you have no idea what the starting number is

also i never claimed that liking admiration isn't a normal trait (though a need for excess admiration is a narcissistic trait, to an extent narcissistic traits are exhibited by most people in the same way "headaches" can indicate a lot of things) or implied it was narcissism

what i said was people who are narcissistic can do nice things when it benefits them and hypatia took it differently than it was meant and went off on admiration

when the reality is being nice can be calculated and people who think otherwise in every circumstance are being naive at best

anyway sorry you took my experiences personally and read **** into what i said that wasn't there because you happen to be a nurse, i suppose now i should wait for the passionate angry waitress with the college degree and no kids who walked away from a career as a chemist to wait tables and didn't like what i said about your average waitress because she isn't average (notice how i never said "your average nurse" this is because nursing requires more work, sacrifice, and schooling than waiting tables) or an actually good teacher who didnt like that i pointed out many teachers aren't effective, good at their jobs, or even people who wanted to be teachers

anyway reread what i initially said and when i said "full of" i meant those careers are ones that a lot of people who choose careers dispassionately flock to, not that the majority of people who choose those fields are dispassionate (though in my experience... lol) my bad if i wasnt clear enough (though to be fair with how many drugs i regularly use i would argue that assuming i'm high and asking for clarity or taking my wording with a grain of salt should just be standard) but again no need to take it personal and act like i said "everyone" either or like i should bring up all the good ones in a conversation that isn't about that

you know plenty of doctors are legit found to be bought off by pharma companies and many abusers also are drawn to caretaker fields, all of them? nah but let's not pretend that's a completely rare occurence to save face for personal reasons

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StubbornVirgo
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posted May 30, 2019 08:21 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for StubbornVirgo     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Dumuzi:
[B]@StubbornVirgo

you can disagree with me, but i know multiple people who fit that example, and i've heard the same from a friend who works in a dementia ward and many other people (and i don't doubt location can play a factor, never pretended otherwise)

i've also been in the hospital a fair amount etc and know plenty of people who tell everyone who doesnt know what to do with their life to get into the medical field because "money"

did i say that's all of them? of course not, but i'd be lying if i said that wasn't plenty of the nurses i've personally encountered (if we're talking majority i've met then i'd say overworked, tired, and the sort of people you can only ever feel lukewarm about because nothing was terrible or good about them) and know other people who can say the same


Actually, you said:

quote:
nursing is a career that's legit full of people who lack passion and don't give a **** lol the whole medical industry is loaded in that

That's pretty clear to me...you're making the assumption that the *whole* medical industry (which I referred to, since you decided to use those terms) is full of people who lack passion and don't care. Seems like a precise, clear statement to me. Idk about you, but I use *whole* and *all* as synonyms. So yes, you did say all of the medical industry and since we're including the entire industry...nursing is assumed to be a part of that, as well.

quote:
you feeling like you have to disagree due to deeply bias personal motives doesn't change my experiences (and i'm not pretending to know yours or anyone you know) and that all being said i never said "the majority of nurses" i said it was a profession that draws in a lot of people like that because a good deal of medical professions do draw in dispassionate people the same as teaching

See above explanation for my response.

Also, YES, I am bias, because I work in this field. But so are you. The only difference is, I'm not using my bias to make broad generalizations and statements about an industry with millions of workers in it.

It's a fair assumption that I probably know more people in this industry than you do. So it's a logical assumption (or so I think) that I have something of value to bring to this discussion, other than my *deeply personal bias*.

quote:
saying a lot of people who arent passionate choose professions like that isn't the same as saying the majority of people in those professions are that type of person anyway

But, you said the entire medical industry is full of people like that. That may be your opinion, but it's not a fact. My experience proves otherwise.

quote:
you aren't really proving anything by "standing up for nursing" here because i said nothing negative about the job as a whole and it was pointless to mention good nurses i know/encounter because that had nothing to do with the context of what was being spoken about (the fact that plenty of people, not just nurses) and i didn't paint "all of the healthcare field" (in the extreme "everyone" sense not the fact that there are a shitload of jobs within the field and it's one dispassionate people flock to) as anything so you telling me to "please" refrain from something i haven't done is pointless

Well, for one it gives a balanced view of the profession. It does a grave disservice to bad-mouth an entire profession and the medical industry on a website where people visiting it will probably have to seek healthcare at some point or other in their lives. And because I'm a part of that industry, I am obligated to stand up for it. You don't have to like it, and you don't have to agree with it. It's not really for you, after all. My argument does have a point, though.

quote:
i'm sorry you took it to some personal place me saying people can have entire careers they arent passionate about and used an example you disliked, but that's not my assessment of the entirety of any group and i don't make judgement calls where i pretend to know the entirety of anything so it's kind of ******** you putting those words in my mouth and unfairly assessing me like i'm that sort of person

when i mean an entire field or a majority of something i use those words, if i didn't then i don't mean that and if i'm not discussing all "thw good ones" for balance it's because they're not part of the conversation and it would be pointlessly out of context

i never didn't consider that and i do know quite a few nurses who aren't **** and have encountered a handful of good ones outside of that but what did they have to do with the point i was making that i should bring them up when i never said "all" i said **** like "i've met plenty" which is true, but a lot doesn't even mean majority when you have no idea what the starting number is

also i never claimed that liking admiration isn't a normal trait (though a need for excess admiration is a narcissistic trait, to an extent narcissistic traits are exhibited by most people in the same way "headaches" can indicate a lot of things) or implied it was narcissism

what i said was people who are narcissistic can do nice things when it benefits them and hypatia took it differently than it was meant and went off on admiration

when the reality is being nice can be calculated and people who think otherwise in every circumstance are being naive at best

anyway sorry you took my experiences personally and read **** into what i said that wasn't there because you happen to be a nurse, i suppose now i should wait for the passionate angry waitress with the college degree and no kids who walked away from a career as a chemist to wait tables and didn't like what i said about your average waitress because she isn't average (notice how i never said "your average nurse" this is because nursing requires more work, sacrifice, and schooling than waiting tables) or an actually good teacher who didnt like that i pointed out many teachers aren't effective, good at their jobs, or even people who wanted to be teachers

anyway reread what i initially said and when i said "full of" i meant those careers are ones that a lot of people who choose careers dispassionately flock to, not that the majority of people who choose those fields are dispassionate (though in my experience... lol) my bad if i wasnt clear enough (though to be fair with how many drugs i regularly use i would argue that assuming i'm high and asking for clarity or taking my wording with a grain of salt should just be standard) but again no need to take it personal and act like i said "everyone" either or like i should bring up all the good ones in a conversation that isn't about that

you know plenty of doctors are legit found to be bought off by pharma companies and many abusers also are drawn to caretaker fields, all of them? nah but let's not pretend that's a completely rare occurence to save face for personal reasons


I'm not really sure what the point of your apology was, considering it's obvious that it's not sincere. And I didn't put any words in your mouth...I simply replied to your very clear statement. If you don't want people to react to generalizations, then don't make them. If you're looking for validation that your generalizations about the medical industry and healthcare workers are correct, then you won't hear it from me. I won't budge on this argument. My initial assessment of your statement stands true. I guess we'll have to agree to disagree.

You're also assuming that my reply to hypatia had anything to do with you...it didn't. It was a separate reply based on a different argument.

It's obvious by the length of your reply, and the redundant nature of it, that you took my response personally. It wasn't intended personally. I saw your statement as an opportunity for education, and maybe enlightenment. It wasn't meant to start a war on here about healthcare, or nursing, or the medical industry.

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Dumuzi
Knowflake

Posts: 1548
From: degenerate#5188
Registered: Oct 2018

posted May 30, 2019 10:26 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Dumuzi     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
@StubbornVirgo

it's not that i took it personal, it's that i assumed you must have a virgo mercury and since i can't talk to people with one properly in most cases i tried to think of as many ways to clearly state my opinions, experiences, and thoughts hoping some of it sticks lol i've made it no secret on this site that i don't do well with virgos and if i remember right you have a virgo stellium yeah? i think it's funny that you're making assumptions about how i feel though when you don't seem to know me even well enough to know i just use generalizations for convenience but see the other side of things and just dont mention it when it's irrelevant (and it is)

again i said "my bad that i wasn't clear enough" initially, i tend to assume other people are capable of understanding that generalizations aren't solid facts and instead are just convenient for conversations

i generally speak in that manner, that being said i still never said "all" or everyone so even being literal it doesn't work (there's so many people in the medical industry that even a small percentage of them is still a lot of people, not saying it's actually a small percentage i don't have actual statistics here and neither do you) so you still did take it in a way it wasn't intended

i find people who are reactive to generalizations a little tiresome in all honesty, because to me it should be a logical given that it's just convenient for conversation's sake and not actual statistics

i see it like that should be a common sense thing

that being said i'm not looking for validation from you lol why would i? i'm just trying to clarify where i stand which is i don't see it as "all" and i never claimed to

i don't care if you budge or not, like i said im not defining you or your personal experiences

i'm sharing mine and other people's and pointing out that there's certain jobs that people who are dispassionate tend to seek for the benefits rather than the work

i legit do find the need to go on about the other side of the coin pointless though, and see it as you just taking **** personal that wasn't

it wasn't a real apology, and wasn't meant to be taken that way lol so you're right i'm not sincerely "sorry" about what i said (why would i be?) i was just saying i'm sorry i have to deal with you taking something personal now because you didn't assume a generalization during a conversation wasn't the equivalent of an in depth statistical analysis of the medical industry and the people in it

you don't understand why people use common phrases like "sorry you feel that way" in conversations?

this is an astrology website btw, i don't think me pointing out that plenty of people in an industry are **** at their jobs and uncaring is going to be taken so seriously that people will deny themselves healthcare or some **** lol you're not obligated to do **** though and it was pointless because you took **** too literally and read too much into it

it also doesn't come off as balanced it comes off like an attempt to save face and make yourself come off in a good light (which is funny considering the initial comment someone else made that led to this whole conversation about virgos really hiding behind a particular mask)

it isn't my opinion that i've had those experiences and so have other people, your experience doesn't disprove anything i said it just confirms that experiences can vary (and i never said otherwise) lol i never discounted your reality here, but you're legit trying to discount mine (and many other people's) with thst statement

it'x not really a fair assumption btw you don't know the people i know or the experiences i've had etc and you should know better than to think your experiences trump anyone else's considering you have an issue with generalizations

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hypatia238
Moderator

Posts: 11611
From: Mercury novile and parallel Pluto, Pluto septile Southnode
Registered: Sep 2014

posted May 30, 2019 03:10 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for hypatia238     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Virgo versus Virgo versus Virgo....

Turns out we are all right bc Virgo is never wrong....

Hahahahahaha

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StubbornVirgo
Knowflake

Posts: 2604
From: Welcome to Mercury
Registered: Jul 2015

posted May 30, 2019 04:58 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for StubbornVirgo     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Not gonna lie, I lost focus about halfway through your reply. We can blame that on my Gemini Moon. I've pretty much already forgotten where this discussion started.

I'm just gonna summarize it very quickly and hopefully end this discussion that appears to be going nowhere: we agree to disagree, for a variety of reasons.

And yes, I'm a triple Virgo.

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StubbornVirgo
Knowflake

Posts: 2604
From: Welcome to Mercury
Registered: Jul 2015

posted May 30, 2019 04:59 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for StubbornVirgo     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by hypatia238:
Virgo versus Virgo versus Virgo....

Turns out we are all right bc Virgo is never wrong....

Hahahahahaha


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Dumuzi
Knowflake

Posts: 1548
From: degenerate#5188
Registered: Oct 2018

posted May 30, 2019 05:19 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Dumuzi     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by hypatia238:
Virgo versus Virgo versus Virgo....

Turns out we are all right bc Virgo is never wrong....

Hahahahahaha


well i'll win because virgo with mercury in actually always right (leo) with uranus 3rd house etc just brilliance all around

when it comes to her denial of reality that stemned from miscommunication well... i've seen nurses fall asleep who were supposed to be watching patients, been given wrong meds (i enjoyed the surprise accidental morphine don't get me wrong, great time, but...), dealt with plenty of rude staff just in general, overheard a doctor and nurse once betting before running some tests on me that i was a drug seeker and treating me poorly until actual issues were found, known people who liked sneaking pictures of funny xrays and interesting injuries to laugh about later, knew one who stole meds etc

my friend who works in a dementia ward (and he is good with patients and does care a lot) regularly discusses all the staff who steal, treat the patients poorly, neglect patients etc

my fiancee's sister had a nurse fired when she was in the hospital because she wasnt allowed pain killers but was supposed to be able to shower for pain as often as she wanted and the nurse refused to help her and watched her suffer in spite of repeated requests for help

could keep going too, it's just a major problem in the industry and it's sad

the reality is very frequently drug users, people with mental issues, invisible illnesses, chronic illness etc get treated very poorly within the system and most people who fall under those categories will have a horror story or two (at least) about mistreatment by the medical community and i get that being a nurse makes her feel like she has to say that isn't reality, but all that does is silence a very ****** up side of the industry

so she can legit tell me forever that her experiences disprove that, but you know not how life works lol

the issue with caretaker jobs in general is that people should care (like you care, like she cares etc) but so many don't

i've seen abusive teachers, abusive nannies etc it extends beyond the medical industry because the flipside of those jobs is they're usually also a convenient outlet for people with power issues and ****

you know i'm pretty sure you're the only virgo mercury who i've been able to speak to without my virgo mercury headache coming on, i usually feel like i may as well be talking to a wall and i get the impression that it's mutual

i wonder if it's because leo mercury tends to generalize and virgo mercury doesn't at all or if it's that most people with it fall into my 12th and it's just lost on me

i imagine the 3rd house neptune probably doesn't help matters

either way i find it sort of sad to have someone in the industry tell me their perspective is more relevant than mine (i know quite a few people in the industry and have heard their stories too which don't back hers) when i personally fall into the groups of people i listed and have likely known on a personal level a lot more people in those categories than her (drug users in particular) who have had very real struggles with getting necessary treatment and dealing with poor treatment from staff in places that should have helped them

i don't personally benefit from being seen as correct here in the same way she does, and while i'm aware i could've worded what i said better (to virgo mercury standards, maybe i need a translator) i know i'm not wrong

and when it comes to you and i, i think a translator could clear that up easier since it seems more like me drug binging and such affected our conversation being as clear as it could be lol i'd allow for a draw there

which is technically a win for me too so i remain always right

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Dumuzi
Knowflake

Posts: 1548
From: degenerate#5188
Registered: Oct 2018

posted May 30, 2019 05:26 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Dumuzi     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by StubbornVirgo:
Not gonna lie, I lost focus about halfway through your reply. We can blame that on my Gemini Moon. I've pretty much already forgotten where this discussion started.

I'm just gonna summarize it very quickly and hopefully end this discussion that appears to be going nowhere: we agree to disagree, for a variety of reasons.

And yes, I'm a triple Virgo.


it's cool, i don't know what i said either entirely and i'm not about to read it

between how high ive been lately and the weather i'm not in the best place for communicating, thunderstorms really **** with me with that (mixing up words, getting lost easier etc) this morning in particular i was pretty bad tremors, brain fog, and other fun **** so i'm sure what i wrote was a huge mess

also between the leo mercury and 3rd house neptune i don't think me and virgo mercuries will ever be able to speak properly for the most part and we probably never will (maybe them falling in my 12th house doesnt help either who knows?)

i won't agree to disagree because i think some of the things you said were straight up wrong, but i don't really care and am kind of bored with it so i'm cool with just not continuing any further if it's all the same to you

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hypatia238
Moderator

Posts: 11611
From: Mercury novile and parallel Pluto, Pluto septile Southnode
Registered: Sep 2014

posted May 31, 2019 02:06 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for hypatia238     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Dumuzi:
well i'll win because virgo with mercury in actually always right (leo) with uranus 3rd house etc just brilliance all around

HAHAHAHA

Well my venus conjunct mars in leo are competing with your mercury in leo bc they are disposited by my sun in virgo which is disposited by mercury in virgo, the final dispositor. I guess our mercuries both have solar influence directly for you and indirectly for me.

...and guess what??! my Uranus rules my 3rd house so we have a tough call here, looks like we are equally brilliant

Also my mercury is retro and squares widely my neptune by 9 degrees and it falls in the 9th.........

I am thinking this is why I don't give you mercury in virgo headaches!

Add that your mercury I think conjuncts my venus so we tend to enjoy talking with each other, that alone may cancel out the headache but then it also conjuncts my mars so maybe we get competitive sometimes.

What degree is your mercury at?

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hypatia238
Moderator

Posts: 11611
From: Mercury novile and parallel Pluto, Pluto septile Southnode
Registered: Sep 2014

posted May 31, 2019 02:31 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for hypatia238     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Dumuzi:

when it comes to her denial of reality that stemned from miscommunication well... i've seen nurses fall asleep who were supposed to be watching patients, been given wrong meds (i enjoyed the surprise accidental morphine don't get me wrong, great time, but...), dealt with plenty of rude staff just in general, overheard a doctor and nurse once betting before running some tests on me that i was a drug seeker and treating me poorly until actual issues were found, known people who liked sneaking pictures of funny xrays and interesting injuries to laugh about later, knew one who stole meds etc

my friend who works in a dementia ward (and he is good with patients and does care a lot) regularly discusses all the staff who steal, treat the patients poorly, neglect patients etc

my fiancee's sister had a nurse fired when she was in the hospital because she wasnt allowed pain killers but was supposed to be able to shower for pain as often as she wanted and the nurse refused to help her and watched her suffer in spite of repeated requests for help

could keep going too, it's just a major problem in the industry and it's sad

the reality is very frequently drug users, people with mental issues, invisible illnesses, chronic illness etc get treated very poorly within the system and most people who fall under those categories will have a horror story or two (at least) about mistreatment by the medical community and i get that being a nurse makes her feel like she has to say that isn't reality, but all that does is silence a very ****** up side of the industry

so she can legit tell me forever that her experiences disprove that, but you know not how life works lol

the issue with caretaker jobs in general is that people should care (like you care, like she cares etc) but so many don't

i've seen abusive teachers, abusive nannies etc it extends beyond the medical industry because the flipside of those jobs is they're usually also a convenient outlet for people with power issues and ****

you know i'm pretty sure you're the only virgo mercury who i've been able to speak to without my virgo mercury headache coming on, i usually feel like i may as well be talking to a wall and i get the impression that it's mutual

i wonder if it's because leo mercury tends to generalize and virgo mercury doesn't at all or if it's that most people with it fall into my 12th and it's just lost on me

i imagine the 3rd house neptune probably doesn't help matters

either way i find it sort of sad to have someone in the industry tell me their perspective is more relevant than mine (i know quite a few people in the industry and have heard their stories too which don't back hers) when i personally fall into the groups of people i listed and have likely known on a personal level a lot more people in those categories than her (drug users in particular) who have had very real struggles with getting necessary treatment and dealing with poor treatment from staff in places that should have helped them

i don't personally benefit from being seen as correct here in the same way she does, and while i'm aware i could've worded what i said better (to virgo mercury standards, maybe i need a translator) i know i'm not wrong

and when it comes to you and i, i think a translator could clear that up easier since it seems more like me drug binging and such affected our conversation being as clear as it could be lol i'd allow for a draw there

which is technically a win for me too so i remain always right


Oh Dumuzi I care for you. I hear you man!

Its possible she works somewhere really nice were the person who hires has good instincts and a good process to weed out people who are not right for that type of career and maybe that is why you two have such different perspectives.

I personally know quite a few nurses who definitely have a calling for it but yes I too hear stories from them of nurses who dont have a calling so is a mixed bag and I get what you are saying. I have wondered if these nurses felt differently early on in their career and then burned out and stopped caring. I wonder sometimes if someday that will happen to me and if so I feel I would have to change careers.

I definitely admire nurses who have a calling for it, that is a very hard job and such a needed and valuable service.

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StubbornVirgo
Knowflake

Posts: 2604
From: Welcome to Mercury
Registered: Jul 2015

posted May 31, 2019 05:32 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for StubbornVirgo     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Dumuzi:
well i'll win because virgo with mercury in actually always right (leo) with uranus 3rd house etc just brilliance all around

when it comes to her denial of reality that stemned from miscommunication well... i've seen nurses fall asleep who were supposed to be watching patients, been given wrong meds (i enjoyed the surprise accidental morphine don't get me wrong, great time, but...), dealt with plenty of rude staff just in general, overheard a doctor and nurse once betting before running some tests on me that i was a drug seeker and treating me poorly until actual issues were found, known people who liked sneaking pictures of funny xrays and interesting injuries to laugh about later, knew one who stole meds etc

my friend who works in a dementia ward (and he is good with patients and does care a lot) regularly discusses all the staff who steal, treat the patients poorly, neglect patients etc

my fiancee's sister had a nurse fired when she was in the hospital because she wasnt allowed pain killers but was supposed to be able to shower for pain as often as she wanted and the nurse refused to help her and watched her suffer in spite of repeated requests for help

could keep going too, it's just a major problem in the industry and it's sad

the reality is very frequently drug users, people with mental issues, invisible illnesses, chronic illness etc get treated very poorly within the system and most people who fall under those categories will have a horror story or two (at least) about mistreatment by the medical community and i get that being a nurse makes her feel like she has to say that isn't reality, but all that does is silence a very ****** up side of the industry

so she can legit tell me forever that her experiences disprove that, but you know not how life works lol

the issue with caretaker jobs in general is that people should care (like you care, like she cares etc) but so many don't

i've seen abusive teachers, abusive nannies etc it extends beyond the medical industry because the flipside of those jobs is they're usually also a convenient outlet for people with power issues and ****

you know i'm pretty sure you're the only virgo mercury who i've been able to speak to without my virgo mercury headache coming on, i usually feel like i may as well be talking to a wall and i get the impression that it's mutual

i wonder if it's because leo mercury tends to generalize and virgo mercury doesn't at all or if it's that most people with it fall into my 12th and it's just lost on me

i imagine the 3rd house neptune probably doesn't help matters

either way i find it sort of sad to have someone in the industry tell me their perspective is more relevant than mine (i know quite a few people in the industry and have heard their stories too which don't back hers) when i personally fall into the groups of people i listed and have likely known on a personal level a lot more people in those categories than her (drug users in particular) who have had very real struggles with getting necessary treatment and dealing with poor treatment from staff in places that should have helped them

i don't personally benefit from being seen as correct here in the same way she does, and while i'm aware i could've worded what i said better (to virgo mercury standards, maybe i need a translator) i know i'm not wrong

and when it comes to you and i, i think a translator could clear that up easier since it seems more like me drug binging and such affected our conversation being as clear as it could be lol i'd allow for a draw there

which is technically a win for me too so i remain always right


Dude, you really don't know how to drop a subject, do you? That's probably why Mercury in Virgo doesn't sit well with you. When we're done arguing redundant details, we're done. But you like to carry it on and on and on and circle back around and talk about things that bother you from a day ago. Holy smokes.

So now I'm in denial and sad and self serving? And wrong to boot for correcting your generalizations and insults? Nice. Good way to end to an argument that I assumed was done already.

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StubbornVirgo
Knowflake

Posts: 2604
From: Welcome to Mercury
Registered: Jul 2015

posted May 31, 2019 05:33 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for StubbornVirgo     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
By the way, I don't recall insulting or attacking you in any of my posts. I remained respectful in my tone. Maybe you could do the same. Drug use is no excuse for how you respond to people on here...no translator needed.

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