posted October 04, 2012 11:28 AM            

I'm a whole lot worse. I'm a computer video gamer. I play games that are patently unsuitable for children or most adults: Call of Duty, Medal of Honor, Grand Theft Auto, etc. But it has never stopped me from enjoying myself after the whole family is asleep. Well, it just so happens that my wife is also a gamer (Sims, etc.), but that isn't my point

Do you garden? Getting him involved in the yard is a good way of injecting machoism while accomplishing home improvement. Get him on the ladder to clear leaves off the gutter. Trim the bushes and clear the leaves.

How about him building something for the kids? A shed? A treehouse? A dollhouse?

How about going shopping for a new TV? <-- that's man stuff. How about a trip to Home Depot/Lowes?

How about washing and waxing the car together? That's team work.

How about coaching some sort of kid's sports team together?

OK. I know I'm weird, but I knit/crochet with my wife and we have some friendly competition

posted October 04, 2012 11:40 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by PhoenixFire:
In our case, my husband's drive used to be higher than my own. Back in those days we'd indulge multiple times a day, both initiating equally. Things have changed not only in that area but also in his health and physical activities.

He used to be much more active outdoors and interested in going out, finding new things to do. Now he mostly wants to zone out w tv and what seems to be a video game addiction, as he has cut off from what he used to enjoy

. I worry about this as it can get lonely having a relationship by yourself, and his health/social life are suffering. When I go out and do my own thing it bothers him to feel left out, yet he won't get off the sofa and come along.

Anyways things are starting to improve not out of being pressured but from realization that this hasn't been working for either of us. I get that relationships go through cycles and change but having a marriage alone isn't what either of us wants.

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Ugh, yeah, what happens a lot of the time is the job becomes the sole focus and then reasons for not engaging fill in around it.

-"have to have the new car"
-"someone has to pay for this house"
-"I'm just being responsible, why don't they understand"

If I may suggest, carve out some "couple" time each week, every week.

posted October 04, 2012 01:26 PM            

lol hubby loves computer games too, favorites are starquest, diablo, and world of Warcraft. Lately he has been playing those when I'm out or asleep, and playing video games with our sons more

. I just bought the boys the new assasins creed, and enjoy watching them play because the assasin character is just too cool for words the new call of duty is on reserve for oldest son and hope he teaches me to play. Trying to find ways to connect with him too & playing the game from time to time seems like a good idea.