posted December 30, 2007 08:50 AM         

That's why everybody has their own perspective on it, whatever turns them on, etc, etc.

Experiences shape the way we perceive and therefore the way we feel about sex.

But who is in control of our mind, ultimately?

We are.

It's all about the doors of perception.....the Eye of the Beholder.....

posted December 30, 2007 11:18 AM         

quote:

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Unless the spiritual dimension of love is added to the mix, the whole act seems much more empty.

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I guess my point is you can say that about anything.

Making coffee in the morning is an empty exercise
if there is no element of spirituality,
or love for the people who will drink the coffee.

Everything in life can be deeply respected,
or taken for granted.

I just dont see the point in isolating sex,
and giving it this supreme importance.

If we should be holy in the bedroom,
or in the confessional,
we should be holy at all times,
in all places.

At the same time,
I am not out to tell people to be holy.

I tell them to be free, to have fun,
and to explore the spectrum of a whole multiplicity of desires.

I said that I am for reverential, meditative love-making,
and for more casual, relaxed, free-spirited romping.

You said it doesnt have to be one or the other,
it can be both, but then you went on to describe a third thing,
and, really, to dismiss both the things I described.

I was saying it can be both, -
meaning, it can be two different things,
and it doesnt have to be one thing.
But you are saying it has to be one thing.
However you describe it,
fast or slow, rough or gentle,
whatever semantic tweeks you make,
you are still saying the same thing.
You are still saying it has to be one way,
and other ways are just degrading.
You are not saying it can be both,
or either, as I am saying.

My point is, if you are serious,
then you should be as puritanical in all your dealings.
You should declare that it is degrading to watch a movie
without paying respectful attention to the humanity
of the actor who is performing for your enjoyment.
You should declare that baseball is a degrading sport,
if one does not give praise to the grass on which one plays,
before, during, and after every game.
Do you see what I'm saying?

Why is sex so unique?

And why are these images of David Bowie and Johnny Depp
any less of a distraction from your Soul Mate,
than pornographic images, to which no romantic longing is attatched?
After all, if I was your boyfriend,
I would be more jealous, and feel more betrayed,
by your emotional attraction to these men,
than by any mere physical attraction.

Anyway, I'm just saying...

Spiritual experiences are lovely,
and I'm sure we would all love it if,
every time we made love,
or played baseball,
or took out the trash,
we could do it with absolute presence of soul,
and experience a transcendant ecstasy,
and a merging with all of life,
but its just not realistic,
and it creates debilitating expectations.
If you insist on degrading the mundane aspects of existence,
you will spend 99.99% of your life feeling degraded.

That's all.

And yes, we can begin by making love and sex a sacred act,
but lets not forget that sex is just one aspect of life,
and the sacredness of our approach to sex
will never be significantly greater or less than
the sacredness of our approach to the other areas of our lives.
When we speak of an activity as sacred,
we are speaking of it in relation to other activities,
and calling it "more" sacred,
or, sacred relative to other activities.
So, the sacredness of a given activity, -
in this case, sex, - appears greater
to the extent that other activities
are seen to be profane, or less sacred.
When you create an aura around one area of life -
lets say, sex, - when you isolate it
and proclaim it "pure" or "special",
you also create taboos around it;
you make "that" profane in order to make "this" sacred.
The line between sacred and profane is a fine one,
and the more emphasis you put on one side of the line,
the more you illuminate the stark contrast between the two sides,
and this contrast is ultimately what creates the profanation.

So I think people should do what they feel like doing.

And I think the more you take something for granted,
the greater your experience of its sacredness will eventually be,
when you are surprised with gratitude to find the sacredness in it.
But the more you try to make it sacred,
the sooner you exhaust the spontaneous magick in it,
and bring about the inevitable sense of empty ritual,
or rigid expectations smothering the flames of spirit.

posted December 30, 2007 11:24 AM         

But I am all for freedom and I say if people are going to have an honest, open relationship and it works for them, then great! As long as the other people who are doing it don't suffer from low self-esteem or question their self-worth, then fine....all I can say is that from people I've known, it is usually the case that they do suffer from low self-worth.

"If it harms none, do what you will".

quote:

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And I think the more you take something for granted,
the greater your experience of its sacredness will eventually be,
when you are surprised with gratitude to find the sacredness in it.
But the more you try to make it sacred,
the sooner you exhaust the spontaneous magick in it,
and bring about the inevitable sense of empty ritual,
or rigid expectations smothering the flames of spirit.

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posted December 30, 2007 11:30 AM         

quote:

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Why is sex so unique?

And why are these images of David Bowie and Johnny Depp
any less of a distraction from your Soul Mate,
than pornographic images, to which no romantic longing is attatched?
After all, if I was your boyfriend,
I would be more jealous, and feel more betrayed,
by your emotional attraction to these men,
than by any mere physical attraction.

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And putting it that way, sex isn't that unique.....yes, all things in life can be seen as sacred.

posted December 30, 2007 11:33 AM         

Yes, I do see now how looking at a celebrity in a lustful way can distract the consciousness from finding their Twin Soul, as Linda put it- just the same as looking at pornography may.

*Edited* to add: I mispelled "sacred" as "scared" to begin with- I find that rather amusing.
I might put this word in lexigram magic to find out what mystical truths people can come up with.

posted December 30, 2007 04:15 PM         

quote:

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Dervish, what sign are you?

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posted December 30, 2007 04:19 PM         

quote:

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I know someone who said she wouldn't understand lust or the Big O at all save that it happens in her dreams (and ONLY in her dreams).

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I use to believe that fantasy was better than reality, and rarely ever experienced the "O".....until I met someone who taught me how to open up and made me comfortable enough to let go.

But they weren't "the One".
Still, everything happens for a reason.
We are on all on a unique path, a journey.