posted April 19, 2006 12:01 AM              

Anyways, some Pisceans do take what others say seriously as they believe in others. Being of non-confronting nature, they might assume things in their own way.. of what others say and how others behave.
Also if I am having doubts about myself in a relationship, I would try avoiding it as I wouldn’t want just exploring the relationship just for the sake of it; when I myself is not clear or not interested in the relationship. I wouldn’t want to go for it now and retreat back later on causing hurt feelings.
I am not sure if it goes for Pisceans, however it might take a while for me to commit, as I require being sure and secure about the other person. Pisces is very much interested in knowing that other person also loves like he does. Unless he is not sure, he would shy going for the relation openly. He might let the relation flow by itself and go along the flow and come to a point where he is really sure that he comes out with his feelings.

Not sure if your guy is really interested in the relationship or still not sure of himself. I feel it is always better to have 1-1 discussion, though Pisces may not be the one to start this discussion

Lillygirl,
I think it’s just the understanding factor of Pisces nature that allows them to be with you, without being judgmental of someone’s nature. I guess I would always appreciate/like a person being in his real self … maybe it’s due to the reason that other person believes in me by being in his real self. That itself is something to cherish. I guess we might give importance to such genuine things as it might match with their own internal values (belief, optimism, unrealistic things – w.r.t. this materialistic world).

posted April 19, 2006 08:17 AM              

quote:

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Why do pisces retreat into their own world and refuse to make contact.

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posted April 19, 2006 08:26 AM              

If both of you know that you two are in the relationship and he is committed to it, then it should be some genuine communication problem. I had frequent natural communication breakdown that I couldn’t do anything about it. Like we used to be in touch through emails and there were times where I couldn’t get access to net to send her email. Or going to a place from where he can’t contact you. Or he being real sick to even get up.

posted April 19, 2006 09:31 AM              

quote:

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Why do pisces retreat into their own world and refuse to make contact.

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quote:

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In a tea cup...
It's a protective measure.
It's natural, we can't really help it.
Sometimes it's to protect ourselves, sometimes it's to keep from out right hurting someone's feelings.

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posted April 19, 2006 09:39 AM              

Thanks for the imput you are providing. I wanted to say that in my experience, Pisces have to be clear about the level of commitment in a relationship to be 100%comfortable in overt, effusive giving. For one thing they long to be fully accepted. They wish to be yours and you to be theirs. If that is not possible or that feeling is not there then I think you will see more incidences of retreating and noncommmunication. I also think that they are fully capable of yearning for, falling in love with and dreaming about someone who is not available to them in any traditional sense of being available. The societal strictures sometimes elude them and they come to each individual as an individual. Whereas another sign might automatically turn off their head or heart against certain folks that come into their lives (the married, the engaged, the same sex.. the co worker etc...), I notice that Pisces do not seem to do this. The boundary issue perhaps of Neptune. So their beauty and their severe weakness is they are letting in all these people and all these feelings, and I assume this would be completely overwhelming. That is what I see and perceive--only--I only have my Chiron in Pisces, nothing else.

Pisces by nature are NOT, I repeat are not AGGRESSIVE or even very ASSERTIVE human beings. This does not mean they don't know what they want -- I think perhaps they do and seem to have an uncanny way often of getting it--if not drawing it to themselves.

My sister and I are very close to my widower Pisces father. He is lovely, beautiful really sweet, kind and a supreme gentleman. He is also generous and very careful not to hurt others. He however is the WORST COMMUNICATOR known to mankind. Both of us have gotten on him about that--more her--than I as I have children, get busy and he reaches out to me when he thinks I am crazy busy. That whole communication thing drove my dead Scorpio mom crazy (they were married 44 years and she complained about that issue til the day she keeled over...lol)....

I would be a bit careful about interpreting their quiet retreat with fear, or confusion. I do sometimes think they simply don't wish to be bothered or engaged. A human perogative? Sometimes a Pisces is not into us even if we wish hard that they are, and the evolved ones generally do not have the heart to bluntly proclaim such a thing. What's tough is gleaning which it is. Because they can behave rather demurely regardless.

My situation with Pisces Doc is that because neither of us is technically available to each other, all such issues are compounded. How do I know he feels anything whatsoever. The look, the smile. But mainly because he has the courage to sort of quietly trample over the societal bans and strictures (professional, religous, marital, cultural) and his own inherent shyness (and yes like my friend Paul and my dad he is shy)
simply to laugh with me, to compliment me and to write me. In exchange I do get to be myself. And when I say, "sorry for swimming inside your boundaries" he laughs it off. I don't think he wants it--or me to stop.

posted April 19, 2006 10:39 AM              

This Cap. sun/ Venus pisces guy I've been talking about does the same thing-- becomes unavailable as to the phone. He became so far removed, that he'd only IM me.

posted April 19, 2006 10:39 AM              

This Cap. sun/ Venus pisces guy I've been talking about does the same thing-- becomes unavailable as to the phone. He became so far removed, that he'd only IM me.

posted April 19, 2006 03:05 PM              

CapGirl,

posted April 19, 2006 09:21 PM              

I am in the same boat. Many times during past 5 months I was thinking "He is just not that into you¨ and every time I was wrong. I am not especially patient (Sagittarius, Ascendant Leo, thank God for Moon in Libra it brings a bit of common sense...lol) and when I didn't hear from him for day or two every time I went into "forget about it" mode and was quite upset...

Relationship with Pisces is like feeding fish in the pond. Here is this gorgeous underwater specimen eating out of your hand and a minute later he is gone and who knows when he shows up next time. Most likely by the time you finally get tired of waiting and turn away. But at this point I seriously think they are just sort of in a different time frame. They don't mean to hurt you, they are not even playing hard to get - they just need a lot of time to themselves. As for not answering the letter, I think even that Pisces can feel very deeply it's difficult for them to put a tag on it. Asking them HOW they feel is the sure way to postpone the answer until like........never. So I don't think your friend sending you a silent farewell, he just doesn't know what to say.

posted April 19, 2006 10:51 PM              

Yeah, I have been away for almost 2 months. Well it surely helped me; in terms of me able to get back to my own self (I mean being around with her was affecting me a lot. It used to keep my mind busy thinking about the situation nd our behavior ... whatever I used to do at work was affected with me being that state). While away, I did have few thoughts, however I think these are normal ones which don't affect my state that much.

I myself didn't initiate any friendly communication (chat/email) as such (I know its like avoiding someone, however I think I haven't got much choice and feel she would think rationally about the same and not feel bad).
I did try to initiate a round-about communication (to check if she initiates communication) and got one friendly official email, which I replied back in a bit friendly manner (commenting that I couldn't make myself write, in response to her statement of "not a single mail from you"). However seeing not much contents in her reply; I just didn't took it further on in a personal way (I mean I did reply but it was a normal professional mail). Since then there has been no friendly types of communication.
I think this (total black out in communication from both ends) was good for me; as its like a fight for me- one mind doesn't want to get involved due to various reasons and the other dreamy mind (I think at the moment, dreamy mind is not having much strength) tries to go into dreams and feel good about it.
There has been 2/3 official mail communications from my end, however on a friendly level its almost "no communication" (and seeing her normal official replies might have lighted me a bit).

Unfortunately I might have to return back Saying unfortunate, not just due to being into a situation with her, however I have my own other personal reasons of being away from my home. Anyways I don't know how things are going to be after I return back. I did make up mind to be as professional as possible in our interactions and my thought process, however don't know how it goes despite the recent breakdown of communication .... Whether the sparks are still there or they have died.
I just hope my heart doesn't again feel goody by being around her, as internally I don't want such a relationship. Even if I imagine it results in some relation, I feel I would make myself resist to strongest extent, with thoughts like - "I would be playing with someone else's emotions by giving false hopes n all, when I know that my internal being will keep fighting against whatever could happen.. When I know I may not be able to give any kind of commitment from my side due to my own reasons, there is no point to start any form of relationship"
So your question remains unanswered ... I don't know if we are still friends or not.

Yep you are correct on whatever you said (atleast it goes for me) - Its like if I accept someone fully I expect to other to do the same. Want the other person to love me as much as I do. Very true on the societal stricture front, if someone is in need that comes first to us. The societal rules n all don't have meaning in front of such things (However there might be inner rules which might hold back some folks and that is where some inner conflict can arise making one retreat and come out again .. to-n-fro).
We may know what we want however won¡¦t fight for getting it and even let go of it thinking ¡§its just materialism of life¡¨. If you mean quietness by "worst communicator", yeah we like it so much, to be in our own cozy world. Even the literal meaning might be true, I have not been that good a verbal communicator in my social/professional life. I need myself time to work out things in my mind before coming out with it. Some of my friends have good laugh when I genuinely blurt out some funny things due to the communication issue. Maybe it's just that we think that the other person should automatically understand what we are saying/want to say, even if it is not through precise words.
I think we don't want others to be in with us, only when there is "no bond" with the other person or other person is altogether on different level of understanding. I am very quiet with most of my relatives as I never could build a relationship bond with them. Though they feel for me and love me, its just doesn't work out for me (maybe it is both - psychological thing in me, along with Piscean nature).
Another reason (along with not wanting to hurt other person by bluntness) of not being confronting is fear (or whatever meaningful word one can give) of getting involved into something, by starting the communication. As I sometimes feel, by getting into a communication I could make myself vulnerable and get involved into a relation or get the other person involved, which I may not want to do (atleast the non-dreamy side of me).

posted April 20, 2006 08:50 AM              

Well I'd be quite surprised if she wasn't still your friend, or least friendly toward you. Even after the distance and tension... Sags tend to be rather optimistic though I do think they get hurt if they begin flailing about too much with their "happy-go-lightly"; it makes them dizzy too. I have seen them get really down and sometimes it's rather unexpected and jarring---and often a conflict between their need to be "free", independent and upbeat and their need to gush and beam and to be intimate with another human being. I find fire signs in general are up against a natural sunniness and flirtiness which can eclipse their need to be loved and truly protected from the world (and themselves even!!) LOL

She doesn't probably know what to do about you--if anything, but I suspect she will be fairly kind, ultimately.

posted April 20, 2006 06:08 PM              

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That...and sometimes that's just where we are, and oftentimes we don't even notice that we're doing it.

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this is true, that didn't even cross my mind at the time.
It's also natural for us to be in our own world, it's not that we mean come across as rude, or ignoring anyone, it's just part of our internal make up.

posted April 20, 2006 06:14 PM              

Ginger B,