posted May 22, 2006 11:13 PM            

1. You said you'd rather see her in person to "see how she really felt." Does this have to do with Pisces intuition?

2. In your pisces opinion, do you gravitate toward "distance makes the heart grow fonder" or "out of sight, out of mind?"

posted May 23, 2006 09:52 PM              

Nope, I wouldn’t make distance for making my heart grow fonder (it might make one fonder). It would be hurting to me by keeping distance for making heart grow fonder. Yes, I miss her when at a distance. Though one might try this just to gauge the feelings from other end (whether other person really loves him), however, probably this would be short duration.

The reason for keeping distance is more from other factors .. like though we like someone, though we may want someone; due to certain factors we try to keep a distance (depends on person to person – like for me at one point it was combination of - values, past decisions, creating havoc in someone else’s married life/family, or we are not sure of ourselves… can we commit). Overcoming these factors might take time. Yeah, it might make one fonder if though being at a distance one still encounters them after a while. Out of sight works only if it is permanent (provided the bond also has not been so permanent that it doesn’t keep lingering in one’s mind). Again forcing one’s self away from someone is tough for a pisces, unless the circumstances make them go with that flow (going away).
Hey in my last post, I wanted to only convey that I miss the lovely moments of closeness/ caring. And not that I like moments of being close and then being at a distant .. that is more of the fact that occurred for me … I was keeping the distant as I am not sure about myself (not due to liking or for making heart grow fonder…. It hurst being apart when you got feelings and you resist your inner self/feelings)

Again these are all my thoughts (Venus/Merc – Aries & Mars in cancer, Sagi Asc would surely have some flavor to Piscean attributes)

posted May 23, 2006 10:48 PM              

However, life isn't a fairy tale. You have to abide by social norms. You can't show ur feelings to a guy b/c u'll look needy and you have to do that whole play hard to get game. Sometimes guys don't like that type of romantic setting (or too busy to have the time)...and worst case scenario, either he doesn't like you back, or he's just playing w/ ur feelings to get to ur pants and leave.

I keep my distance, appear to be in control, and though I do become close to someone...I overthink and assume that the guy doesn't care, and then go back to my distance again. Sometimes I cut off people without warning b/c I feel that I'm going to lose my sense of control over my emotions or sense that I'm going to get hurt...and I can't do that or else I'll be vulnerable and perhaps mess up my life.

Everyone hates getting hurt...but I think pisces, more than anyone, get hurt the most b/c they can sense the slightest variation in vibe, especially when the person doesn't like something that you're doing.

Which answers the question- why do you need to see the person? It's because we can read their body language (and if I put enough thought into it...I can start unlocking their personality and when I find a pattern, I can predict how they will act everytime a certain situation occurs)

Seems complicated...but once you get the hang of it, it becomes second nature...I do that all the time. I sometimes scare my friends b/c they know I know too much about them...ha ha ha

For example, my friends and I were enjoying a sunny day on campus...then people needed to go to wherever they had to go. I could've stayed with a certain friend of mine, but I chose not to...so she was going to end up being alone, but she realized it and said "I'm gonna go too, I don't wanna be alone by myself"...I was like, "ha ha, I know...that's why I said I'm leaving." She was like "You're scary, you know me too much." (I like psyching people to do what I think they will do based on their behavioral pattern)

posted May 31, 2006 09:26 PM              

And I got to know that she had no idea of what I would be discussing (even after giving some hints prior to our talk). Well it turned out to be total fiasco, as she responded negatively. I didn't ask clearly and specifically whether she had any feelings however I did tell her I had feelings for her and reason was due to her soft corner n all. And her response was negative.
It was terrible feeling for quiet a while after that... knowing that she didn't have feelings and even after knowing this, I was feeling that she should had some feelings & she responded negatively as I didnt' ask her specifically (I was kind of lost for words as I couldnt be open out properly during our talk, once I found that she had no clue of what I would be talking).

Though being far away surely helps, I dunno how long I will feel for her ... as the thoughts of her having feelings for me won't go away, so easily...

posted June 09, 2006 07:30 PM              

Well yeah, I choose the wrong word fiasco. The talk was a fiasco from my point of view because I couldn't communicate properly and get proper clear cut answers due to anxiety. It doesn't hurt that she doesn't have feelings for me, as it was not love -just initial stage of attraction/feelings .. infatuation. But something else caused me hurt.

Probably 'faisco' did occur later on She got hurt by my third mail where I direcly comfronted her with questions that whether she had feelings for me (even after knowing that she had told me that she didn't realize anytime that I had developed feelings for her). More details at http://www.linda-goodman.com/ubb/Forum1/HTML/009334.html

Yes, I am lighter of one thing now. Knowing the fact that she had never any feelings for me, it would be easier for me to drive these feelings out of me.
However there had to be a price to pay for that... causing hurt to her, which made me feel bad .. and bit like falling down in her eyes. Probably our interactions won't be as they were earlier.
Whenever I feel bad that such a nice relation/friendship had to end (not sure if it ended permanantly Or after a while we both would return back to normal), I force myself to think that the relation was never a reality as she never had thought from that angle ..it was just my rosy thoughts. Thats how I drive out my thoughts of feelings.

I guess the situation was bought for some reason. Still, from now onwards I would be more strict in throwing my thoughts out as they are not based on facts and reality. ... Just my instincts/feelings/judgement which are not right that I can rely on them.

I also commented in another post that Pisces shouldn't commit/give in their self unless all their criteria of a relationship are met, else we get hurt (being water the hurt stays for long as compared to Fire/air signs). Diluting our standards/ideals of relationship we try to give our everything for it (Yes we are also needy), however for me it hasn't turned positive (previous relation with my Gem is a major example... this one may be just a minor one).

posted June 09, 2006 08:55 PM              

Well I am very sorry for your pain. I know it hurts. I do believe that sometimes persons are naturally warm and effusive and it can be mistaken for more.

Pidua mades some excellent comments on the other thread and I would like to echo them. I think it is vital to respect where your Sag is coming from but also to see your feelings for their genuineness and kindheartedness.

I am Sag rising also and though rarely---I can be very overflowing when I "click" with or simply enjoy the company of another. One problem with married people is sometimes they actually feel freer to be overtly warm towards others. They may assume that, "Hey I am married; he or she knows that--so I can be this way." That can be problematic.

I would not discount that she had feelings for you (for example I am ashamed to say I know I have feelings for Doc because we seem to go out of way to never discuss our spouses with each other) but her life is the one that she is living and has chosen as a wife, mother and married woman.

Try not to put too much weight on this situation (it sounds though you have healthily resolved it as an early stage infatuation). She was hurt that you persisted I believe and then implied that she indeed had feelings when she said she had none. Always respect your feelings and those that another purports to have for you. Indeed, we can't presume to ever truly know what is in another's heart (even if we have an inkling that we have spied before they have..)

I have so much hope and optimism that you may be able to return to friends. Give it time and breathing room. Sags have a way of spilling back in with their own brand of sunshine, Don't despair! There is much love in this world for you.

posted June 09, 2006 10:30 PM              

Yeah, you might be right. Being married, one getting freer (even if not married, being a Sagi one should get that kind of outgoing nature).

Umm, I am not sure of that though.. she having feelings …as when confronted, I believe, she wouldn’t fake and say no. Also she specifically replied she loved her husband deeply and she was really hurt this time. (I guess my miscommunication also leads to such situations.... I should have got cleared out in first instance itself).
Even if she did had anything, I didn’t expect anything from her as I just wanted to confirm and get out with my bottled up feelings and be sure of them (still maybe at some corner of mind I did see some hope of some relationship that I came out and discussed with her). Yeah sub-consciously some thoughts would still have been alive knowing that she does have feelings (if that was the case). Now it is easier, when one knows other person has nothing and one’s doubts have been put to rest.

Not sure if you would deny up-front if Doc asked u the same Even if u did deny, u won’t get hurt, right and say so to him that u r hurt due to his question. (dunno, females are so different and hard to understand )

posted June 09, 2006 10:30 PM              

Thanks for all the support, it helped. I am much much better today (maybe due to my manager not being around today … he is new to me and quiet young - not to me but as compared to others that I have been with) … finding bit hard to deal with him … in the sense that he doesn’t try to understand things properly and judges things quickly without knowing the reality)

Congrats on your son’s valedictory graduation. Hey maybe ur Doc also revels ur company and maybe he is giving signs or trying to perceive how u respond to know what u have for him. (What if he opens up like I did...)

Even if u two can’t have that worldly kind of relationship, hope u can have a pure innocent relation like of a soul mate (though its unrealistic of having such a ‘pure’ relation, as we humans do fall for our senses)

posted June 10, 2006 07:35 AM              

I guess (and talking from my pisces side), Pisces men once in love feel extremely confused because there'll be something strong and spiritual going on inside them. In love, they'll share their romantic fantasies with you, they'll be very empathic about your feelings...depending on their chart they'll be more assertive or not about those feelings of confusion/merging when in love....

The ones I've met were under 40 and seemed a bit lost (guess neptune is still easier for women, as conventionally and up till recently moon and neptune vibes have been more carried out by women) and if earth is in they chart, in my experience, they find it harder to relate to their spiritual side.

For those falling for a Pisces, remember the transiting uranus rocky ride!

Kp inspired

posted June 10, 2006 01:54 PM              

Yes. I gave it a bit more thought last night and I do think you are right. She would not deny those feelings and be as overtly upset when you persisted if she wasn't being frank. Sagittarians are notorious for becoming hurt or angry when someone questions their integrity or honesty. Linda Goodman discusses this in her Sun Signs books. Our son is Sagittarius (Cancer Rising) and he is very much like that in the midst of all his sunniness and warmth.

I am happy to see you are feeling better. I can hear that in your words. Funny ---about your manager. I immediately sensed that he is trying desperately to make a good impression but it is inaadvertently backfiring on him!

posted June 10, 2006 09:37 PM              

LG,
I wish that your goofy relation and the nice unconditional affectionate bond never to end

posted June 12, 2006 01:34 AM              

anyways, here is my chart if you can to give any feedback.
Planetary positions
planet sign degree house motion
Sun Pisces 18°22'23 03 direct
Moon Aries 10°39'13 04 direct
Mercury Pisces 05°58'53 03 direct
Venus Pisces 28°56'01 03 direct
Mars Taurus 01°39'08 04/5 direct
Mars is technically near the end of house 4 and is interpreted in house 5.
Jupiter Scorpio 05°29'40 11 retrograde
Saturn Taurus 05°36'44 05 direct
Uranus Libra 07°32'21 10 retrograde
Neptune Sagittarius 00°52'51 12 retrograde
Pluto Virgo 26°16'15 09 retrograde
True Node Pisces 11°49'51 03 retrograde

House positions (Placidus)
Ascendant Sagittarius 16°55'02
2nd House Capricorn 20°07'48
3rd House Aquarius 27°16'08
Imum Coeli Aries 02°32'36
5th House Taurus 01°43'12
6th House Taurus 25°35'27
Descendant Gemini 16°55'02
8th House Cancer 20°07'48
9th House Leo 27°16'08
Medium Coeli Libra 02°32'36
11th House Scorpio 01°43'12
12th House Scorpio 25°35'27

Major aspects
Sun Opposition Pluto 7°54
Sun Square Ascendant 1°27
Moon Opposition Uranus 3°07
Moon Trine Ascendant 6°16
Mercury Sextile Mars 4°20
Mercury Trine Jupiter 0°29
Mercury Sextile Saturn 0°22
Mercury Quincunx Uranus 1°33
Mercury Square Neptune 5°06
Venus Trine Neptune 1°57
Venus Opposition Pluto 2°40
Mars Opposition Jupiter 3°51
Mars Conjunction Saturn 3°58
Mars Quincunx Neptune 0°46
Jupiter Opposition Saturn 0°07
Saturn Quincunx Uranus 1°56
Neptune Sextile Pluto 4°37