posted May 05, 2004 04:45 PM         

But she dropped off the face of LL... *sad*

posted May 06, 2004 03:14 AM         

First gotta say, I realized the other day, not only does he have the Singleton Cappy Moon in the 1st House, it is Conjunct his Eros. I've been doing more research on Eros (and Psyche now too), and so, as if his Cappy Moon as a Singleton wasn't enough, and as if it being in the 1st House wasn't enough, it's Conjunct his Eros which I'm learning is EXTREMELY powerful in itself, but makes his Moon's energy 100 times more potent as well!!

So take a deep breath and try to imagine THAT...

I just a minute ago finished reading the following regarding Eros, and it sums up what he's dealing with in reference to me: (And PixelPixie, heads up! This is for you too):::

"...We've all heard the old adage: 'If you love someone, set them free, and if they come back to you...' etc., etc. How many of us have rolled our eyes and thrown up our hands in despair at this advice, all the while knowing that it was true? I know I have. Love, after all, is powerful. We want it and we don't want it, all at the same time. We yearn for it and yet deny that yearning. We make up excuses. We decide it is safer, perhaps, to opt out of the whole mess. And so we settle. Sometimes we settle for relationships based on the safer emotional territory of friendship and comfort, not realizing that in so doing we have committed ourselves to denying who we truly are and what we most deeply desire.

The same phenomenon also often applies to our careers and pervades our creative natures. We turn our backs on our wildest dreams in exchange for safety. We allow ourselves to stagnate, using very material considerations such as responsibility, survival and finances as excuses. But we must make no mistake about it: as seemingly reasonable as they are, they are excuses nonetheless.

Eros transits might indeed coincide with times when we question whether or not we should stay or go, when we so urgently feel the lack of passion in our lives that we are tempted to throw everything to the wind. An unsatisfied Eros will not be subtle. Relationships or careers of convenience and social grace will no longer float. Marriages made out of fear that no one better will ever show up will no longer be cosmically tolerated either. Eros will intervene.

This is not to say that every moment of life is meant to be a constant passionate whirl. On the contrary, Eros cannot handle day-to-day chores and life. Eros drowns in dishwater, disappears at the mention of bills, hides when the relatives come over to visit...and this is appropriate. Eros will not deter us from earning our daily bread if we acknowledge his presence when necessary. If we remain keyed in to our deepest desire natures, Eros will allow us the freedom to accomplish what needs accomplishing, and yet our hearts will not feel the lonely ache of time and dear love lost whilst we are so busy earning our sustenance.

Resisting Eros altogether is a bad idea. He will torment us with unreachable desire after unreachable desire. To work with Eros, we must remain flexible and open. We must acknowledge his loving darts. We must follow our hearts, always, and without fear or guilt. We must learn to love ourselves enough to do this.

Some people truly are afraid to give in to Eros. They are afraid that if they give in to love, they will become soft and lose everything. They are afraid they will be made fools of, financially, emotionally, every which way. And perhaps they will at first, until they become more in touch with their own wisdom. But so what? Love has ever been and ever shall be the property of the fool. Only the fool will get to experience the dizzying heights, the sublime depths..."

So that's it, and I could not have explained it any better, so you showed up just in time Delta! As a Libra myself, I know sometimes we need to ponder things and allow them to take on an alchemy of their own. So it's my turn to "set HIM free" to see if he comes back. I already came back to him. He's been "wanting" me for so long, and now he has me, but he's still not sure what to do with the whole thing.

I've kept everything with him really simple, and that's just me. Maybe he's thinking it can't be this simple and uncomplicated, my unconditional love for him.

posted May 06, 2004 03:32 AM         

<<Love, after all, is powerful. We want it and we don't want it, all at the same time. We yearn for it and yet deny that yearning. We make up excuses. We decide it is safer, perhaps, to opt out of the whole mess. And so we settle. Sometimes we settle for relationships based on the safer emotional territory of friendship and comfort, not realizing that in so doing we have committed ourselves to denying who we truly are and what we most deeply desire. >>

i got shivers when i read this bit... its prolly true of everyone but rings so true for all those i know with strong cappy placements... we almost run away from strong passionate love to seek something more stable and ordinary... its more trustworthy maybe?

can you explain what is actually going on between you two right now? the eros stuff is a general sort of thing but what are you saying etc to each other

posted May 06, 2004 03:48 AM         

A few nights ago we were together and the next day after I left his place, I called him to remind him of something, and before I hung up I said, "Love you - bye!" and he goes, "What?" and after a little bantering back and forth, I got the impression he thought I was saying "I'm in love with you" and all that would entail for HIM.

He was not able to understand my lighthearted side of it, although we'd discussed it calmly before!

He's told me about his feelings for me, and through his actions, I'M SURE he loves me, but he's not wanting to "label" it too strongly because of the responsibility that he connects to it.

It's like he's trying to make sure I don't get hurt by going off in some girly love tangent. You know what I mean? It was more a knee-jerk reaction DESPITE everything we'd established calmly and logically up until then.

posted May 06, 2004 11:29 AM         

Very cool... thanks for sharing that.

posted May 07, 2004 01:41 AM         

I called him a couple of hours ago and I could tell he was happy to hear from me, being a week since we saw each other & since we talked. I could hear it in his voice, maybe kind of a little relief. I probably had him wondering for a while there, you know...

So it was sweet to know it mattered.

His chart stuff I've already mentioned, he's the type of guy that you go to HIM. Not that he won't ever call me or show his feelings, or even talk about them, because he has and does.

OH! I just remembered. ON TOP of all his chart stuff, I just read something about a "sole dispositor" in Venus. How THAT makes someone want people to cater to them, and he's got that too in Libra!!!

I've known him over a year and he's never treated me unfairly or rude, so it's not like that's his main M.O. But in terms of his love style, he is that type, and I'll say it again... it's got my Venus & Pluto in Virgo just... UH! How can I explain this without sounding more like a kook?

I've never felt this chemistry with anyone that I can remember. And if I did, it was very short-lived and forgetable. It's not even HIM per se that makes me feel this way, it's more like this 3rd entity as a result of our togetherness. Like I told him last week, "You're making me run my 2 miles every day again." But it's not really HIM making me, it's something else.

Damn - I need to shut-up.

Just didn't want you to think I was still distressed. Everything is working out this way for a reason. I got to feel him squirm a little, and he got a phone call from me. But any feedback is always welcome.

(Actually, this is kind of hilarious).

Thanks.

posted May 07, 2004 10:25 PM         

don't think u can tell whether or not he loves you from how he reacted to u saying it... but cappy moons sure don't waste time on people they don't have feelings for, let me tell you!

posted May 08, 2004 01:51 AM         

Yeah, I do analyze things too much sometimes, but I'm learning not to with life in general and have made great strides the last couple of months. In this case, I'm really not so much worried about his feelings for me per say because we've sorted that out, but my concern is more of making sure that we both love each other as FRIENDS FIRST. Know what I mean? Cuz I think he's the type that if he thinks of you as an official "girlfriend" or being "in love", it changes his whole perspective and values.

Do you know what I mean?

He's not had a friend/erotic lover/girlfriend (in that order) all in one before, and that's definitely me and how I'd like to be thought of and treated. Friends first because he has the tendency to set unrealistic standards if he thinks of the relationship as "serious stuff".

He has an aspect in his chart which is like, he's had trouble loving the girl he's sexual with, and has trouble being sexual with the girl he loves - type thing. And because he has some strong Uranus aspects, I know friendship is important.

But what you said about Cappy Moons not wasting time with people they have no feelings for is very comforting and reinforces what I mean when I say I'm aware of his feelings for me by deed. And he has many ways of showing me, by just flat out telling me, as well as his actions. That's what I mean! You nailed it! He's already said many times that no one else has made him feel the way he wants to treat me, and I don't take that lightly coming from him! Good to know he's discriminating as he is.

As for needing regular time without me, I'm also well aware of that because we have that in common. It's like alchemy. Takes time to let the important things surface on their own, and then you're like "oh - this is what the relationship is about"... His Sun & Mercury falls in my 6th, so he cares about my everyday actions, and is verbal about them as well.

My Sun falls in his 10th, so I care about his social and career goals. So because of these two Sun placements, I've been careful to not let things feel too heavy. It's good enough to just know we are there for each other in those ways, right?

He's still in the phase where he's calculating my intentions and I admire him for that and the way he's going about it, the fair Libra that he is.

posted May 11, 2004 12:14 AM         

i find it very difficult to give relationships time to develop and grow slowly, i always want to rush. but they need that time to grow and well done to you for being so patient about it all.

posted May 11, 2004 10:26 AM         

So he sounds familiar huh?

Thanks for saying I've thought things out, and still, I AM getting better at not overanalyzing everything.

Are you saying that a Cappy Moon seems to move slowly, but that you personally want to rush into it? Just want to clarify what you said because it seemed like a contradiction.

posted May 12, 2004 09:46 AM         

To elaborate on what Delta has been saying, I think she's totally right on about the cappy-moons and once bitten twice shy. My boy is the same. He's a deep down romantic, but it took a while for him to share that with me because he was afraid to after what his ex did to him. I had to be very patient with him on that aspect, and just be there reassuring him of my feelings and intentions, while at the same time not scaring him away. So tell me how much fun THAT was. Being the loving partner, and keeping my distance enough to let him feel unpressured but still cared for the way he wanted to be.

Ugh, my head hurts from trying to explain that...

posted May 12, 2004 11:55 AM         

Thanks for sharing this.

You say the guy you are dating now has a Cappy Moon? When you say you had to be patient before he really let go with you, how long did it take?

(Hope I don't make your head hurt more - hee hee)

Speaking of once bitten twice shy, I have a Cancer Moon! So the only reason I'm secure with this is because I've known him so long, or else we'd be like ships passing in the night (and he never would've gotten the booty either)

But there are times when my feelings are on edge and I wonder about his feelings so much that I, well, get in a negative loop. But then I'll talk to him and my heart just melts right away.

posted May 12, 2004 01:28 PM         

We love very deeply, but generally, would rather show you in material ways, rather than with a poetic, flowery love speech and an overblown emotional display. Don't forget, despite the great wisdom anyone with strong Cappy is capable of, it's still the sign that epitomizes materialism. And no, I don't think it's necessarily a big negative to be materialistic in this material world. Leave the ethereal stuff for when we cross over.

posted May 12, 2004 01:31 PM         

And to be honest, I don't waste much time at all on casual dating. Moon and exact Jupiter conjunction in Cappy in the 5th house. Saturn in Cappy is in there too.

posted May 12, 2004 03:01 PM         

Thanks for your input. He is very concerned about money and family, the future. I'm not sure how materialistic he is per say, because those things come first.

His Sun, Merc & Pluto are in Libra in his 10th House (of materialism). My Sun falls in his 10th, so I have a way of contributing to his procedure going about it. His Mars is in the 8th, and our respective Moons both land in each other's 8th.

And finally, my Jupiter & Saturn in Capricorn land in his 2nd. His Jupiter in Cancer lands in MY 2nd. So it would seem I would fit into his overall picture as far as materialism goes. What do you think?

In our Composite, all the planets land in the 7th & 8th, except for Jupiter in the 2nd, and Neptune in the 9th.

Also Trillian, besides welcoming yours and anyone else's thoughts on above, you were basically reiterating what your fellow Cappy Mooner Delta was saying about not dating just anyone. Were you trying to say that his interest in me is bonafide then?

Thanks. All this helps to understand him better, as well as helping me understand why he seems to take me to a "higher spirital realm", and why I've never felt such physical intensity with anyone else.

.gloria