posted March 17, 2005 12:03 PM         

I have a daughter - about to turn 23. StarLover is only 18. If my daughter had been in her situation, I would hope that someone would have been blunt with her - as Gemini Nymph and I have been. Yeah - it sounds lecturey and not very empathetic or compassionate. And, yes, not very likeable comments. That is okay with me. StarLover just needs to direct her fantasies elsewhere. I don't want to see her hurt, as I would not like to see my own daughter hurt.

This teacher-student relationship has not been good for StarLover. Please re-read her following comments (this is a quote; these are not my comments):

______________________________

"I think I'm making things more difficult than they really are. I skipped his quiz again, my mind keeps drawing blanks. The confidence factor is a big problem. I don't think I can tell him about my leanings torward astrology and philosophy. He already thinks I'm weird enough, I shouldn't add anymore reasons. THE PROBLEM IS, I don't belong in PreCalculus, I don't know that the heck I'm doing. The material is ridiculous, and he is making it much harder for me. Lately, he's been acting very detached and uncaring. I just don't know what is really going on here. I shouldn't pursue this man any further than I aready have. It's getting very difficult. I can't do anything, I really need my christmas vacation. I need time to think. I don't want to go through torcher and hell especially in my senior year. However, I think it's too late, I have to stick it out until the end. He is beginning to give me hell."

posted March 18, 2005 02:50 AM         

I have gotten into bad relationships before...that I wish I had not gotten into. Ones that people in general would not consider ethical...

There were plenty of people warning me that my heart would be broken besides the fact that its dangerous, but anyhow I learned the hard way

I do agree that StarLover could potentially be in a very bad situation, but if she is really in that or not, we all think 'she is probably not'.

Key are u fire or air? Because my initial reaction was the same, and as Gem nymph, we fire/air ppl tend to think with all brain

Star lover, if I am correct, is a Pisces, so she will dream a lot and maybe she needs those dreams. I dream a lot about older men in general (not wayyy older, but 7-10 yrs older than me). I usually only get in relationships with men 7-10 yrs older than me. I married a man 3 yrs older than me and it didn't work out at all.

Any how, I guess my point is that we are all somewhere in the middle on this, most importantly that we all have concern for Starlover in our hearts--some that she may feel welcome, and others that she may know what is best for her in the long run, and I think both things are important, but I agree that even if something wrong does happen, which Im hopeful that it will not becoz SL is so mature for her age, but she will only have to learn from her own mistakes, unfortunately even when other ppl warn they only become villains and never educators.

Archer once posted that Sex with his Aunt thread, and some ppl very much reprimanded him, but the point was that he recognized it was unacceptable behavior and wanted to stop. I think SL thought it could be harmful too at some point, and her conscience is against her, I Always say thats good, its good for your consciences to go against your heart because that conflict means you are rational, moral AND passionate, and who could resist that right?

posted March 18, 2005 10:32 AM         

Thank you very much for your message. Yes, I have fire in my chart - but as much earth ... capricorn rising, taurus and virgo placements. And, yes, thank you - I test out smart - SATs, etc. Mainly, though, I have got the common sense factor. While I have made many mistakes in my life - with that fire rushing in - my earth usually stops me in the nick of time.

No one wants advice. Not really. People mainly want to hear what they want to hear. Most of the people posting would like others to validate their point of view. This is only natural. The "wake-up" call posts are not usually appreciated. Still, the seed of doubt can be planted. I have noticed this with my children. When I take the "high road" - I get can "hate" in return. Yet, frequently, the "high road" - in a couple of weeks, can be all their own idea. By the way, I have an excellent relationship with both of my grown children (and my husband).

Very difficult for me to comprehend any encouragement in the pursuing of a teacher. Most people watch the news on television or read the daily newspaper. Teachers who get involved with their students can lose their jobs and could go to jail. The rules are in place to protect the student. It does make sense to me.

posted March 18, 2005 03:20 PM         

A lot of posts on this forum, and Im not excluding myself, say something along the lines of, can someone please let me know that this impossible thing will happen, because i want it to, or that this horrible thing wont happen, because i dont want it to, or something like that. And its so natural! We're scared of negative change, and it depends on how you define negative change doesnt it? Some people see negative change as any change in their fate that goes against what they had desired or planned, some people see it as something different...

Anyhow a very long arse philosophical reply hehehe, but I just want you to understand that I do understand where you're coming from, I also understand pix's point of view, and like I said, Pisces does not have the same go get it attitude that sometimes the more think it thru signs like Earth/Air etc. have, because they are dreamy, they survive on dreams, and dreams are their oxygen! To a large extent I think, unless their dreams are leading to self or other's destruction, we should allow them to dream whatever because it is healthy for their own personality; it is their self expression.

To my understanding SL hasnt acted irrationally, and I doubt that she will, because she understands that this is simply a fantasy, and how many times have any of us had fantasies of getting it on with anyone and everyone inappropriate from the UPS man to the President, and they never materialize because that is exactly what fantasies ARE--they are dreams of actions and things that can never be realized in practical terms, that is the reason we fantasize about them, if they were realistic we would pursue them instead of fantasizing.

Anyhow hope that clears my point and lessens any hostility/conflict of opinion

posted March 19, 2005 10:37 AM         

Young teacher, the subject
Of schoolgirl fantasy
She wants him so badly
Knows what she wants to be
Inside her there's longing
This girl's an open page
Book marking - she's so close now
This girl is half his age

Don't stand, don't stand so
Don't stand so close to me
Don't stand, don't stand so
Don't stand so close to me

Her friends are so jealous
You know how bad girls get
Sometimes it's not so easy
To be the teacher's pet
Temptation, frustration
So bad it makes him cry
Wet bus stop, she's waiting
His car is warm and dry

Don't stand, don't stand so
Don't stand so close to me
Don't stand, don't stand so
Don't stand so close to me

Loose talk in the classroom
To hurt they try and try
Strong words in the staffroom
The accusations fly
It's no use, he sees her
He starts to shake and cough
Just like the old man in
That book by Nabakov

Don't stand, don't stand so
Don't stand so close to me
Don't stand, don't stand so
Don't stand so close to me

posted March 21, 2005 11:00 AM         

We are all talking back and forth and are concerned about this young lady. She doesn't seem to be around any more. I hope she is okay.

First - There isn't really any hostility/conflict (at least not on my end). Pixie obviously cares deeply about SL. Disagreements are okay. We all have room to grow and change. I do, any way.

SG -
I relate to your posts. Doesn't sound like our charts have much in common - so there goes the astrological factor. Yet, I nod my head up and down when I read your posts.

14 Stars -
A sweet and helpful post - but I don't think StarLover is reading this thread. Sometimes it is easier - when we are in the middle of intense feelings, to just "wait", instead of the "never".

Heart-Shaped Cross, the creative writer - can say just what I think in a song. BTW,
I admire the sign of scorpio above all others.

I am for the children. It is an old slogan -but, "it takes a village" rings true to me. When we know of a child or young adult struggling in our own community, it is easy to think ... "phew, I am glad he is not my child". Better, to get involved and to try and help that child. My child is your child, and your child is my child - I like that kind of thinking. Perhaps I have come to that conclusion because many people have helped my own children - when they would not/could not listen to me.

posted March 22, 2005 12:53 PM         

The story has not ended, but it has taken the strangest turn you could've ever thought possible. I will be back with my story, as soon as I have the time I will right back about what has happened to me these past 6 months. There has been a change in me! It has been a very emotional rollercoaster. I've had to deal with so much emotional baggage in such a short period of time. I've discovered that I'm an 18 year old genius!

It's not over yet, and I will be back with my side of the story soon!

posted March 22, 2005 07:30 PM         

First the bubbliness, then the slapping of self? Is everything ok?

Let us know asap ok?

posted March 22, 2005 10:24 PM         

we missed you!