|
Author
|
Topic: Love from an Aqua: Can it be real?
|
Crabplanet
Newflake Posts: 11
From:
Registered: May 2009
|
posted May 03, 2007 10:27 AM
  
Hippi, thanks for your wisdom and for the other post. Funny how I have a Mars in Aqua, NN in Aqua, and how I'm still so "attached" to that SN in Leo (+ a Saturn in my 5th house...), so I'm an expert in creating ego-drama in my relationships (Venus square Pluto, Venus square Uranus...)still a lot of work to do in that sector... IP: Logged |
Mama Mia
Knowflake Posts: 137
From:
Registered: Feb 2010
|
posted May 03, 2007 10:32 AM
Crabp: I am glad you went regardless if things did not work out the way that you wanted them to. I think that it was better to have gone then not to have gone bc then you would have been wondering what if..Yes they can be very self-centered and selfish and I have experienced that with my aqua and I called him on and will continue when I feel that he is doing that. Its unacceptable. What I realize is its just their way and well I am not for sure if he realized what he was doing but I made him realize it. Other ppl in his life never said anything fear of losing his friendship I guess. Oh well..You don't have to except his behavior, don't scream and yell about it to bring it to him let him know how you feel about being treated like that. You are going to learn how to talk to him. I know that you are scared of somethings. But from what I can see this is not going to go away and well you may need to resolve somethings. There are some lessons here for you and him gotta get them.. Its a process with them really. I have learned a great deal about myself from my relationship with my guy alot. I thought I had some things on the ball and well interacting with him and seeing whats what I realize I can do some work on me as well..So next time you talk to him tell him how you feel about the way he treated you, don't remain quiet bc it will keep happening over and over and if he continues to do it over and over after you told him then you have to show him that you will not be treated badly. I went through some of the same things that you are going through so I know. Trust me when I say things are different today. And when they really love you they change their behavior, if they do not want to lose you.. IP: Logged |
Crabplanet
Newflake Posts: 11
From:
Registered: May 2009
|
posted May 03, 2007 06:14 PM
Mama Mia, I don't know if it would help him to hear that there are "ways" and "manners" of how to treat people, and in a way, I don't want to hurt him with this, so yes I am keeping this to myself (...I'm good at hiding, Moon in Capri...so I'll make sure he will never see me crying)I think it's something that you have to feel it in your heart, a kind word, a gesture, it has to come from the heart, not from the mind... I'm not blaming on him for what happened yesterday, there are so many people out there to whom this would be just a normal way of being, I'm actually blaming myself for falling in love with the wrong person, + blaming on the "pull" we talked about...For the emptiness, it's not something that is inside of me, it's when I'm with him, I want to share so much, so that by getting this kind of behaviour it makes me think that I'm not sharing anything...That's why I go back to my question, how can you talk about serious things like having a baby with a person when for "little things" the other person is so "absent", like sharing a simple meal?IP: Logged |
Crabplanet
Newflake Posts: 11
From:
Registered: May 2009
|
posted May 03, 2007 06:20 PM
Mama Mia, in a way, I think he lost me...IP: Logged |
thisdivarocks
Newflake Posts: 0
From: land of love
Registered: Nov 2011
|
posted May 03, 2007 07:46 PM
Words of wisdom:I am a Cancer (applause)
We are highly emotional.... more than any other sign. We are the motherly, southern hospitality, are you okay sweetie type. You can not make the mistake of expecting others 2 be like us. That is what defines us as Cancers. Realize & remember that just because some one doesnt love you the way that u want them 2 love you, that doesnt mean that they arent loving you the best way that they know how. or with all that they have.
We all have different definitions of love. How about you define love & then casually one day ask him what he thinks love is. Brainstorm....Challenge him intellectually and see what happens. Because love is different amongst men & women, and in respect to different cultures as well. I know how it feels. I have been in my car crying many days. It feels good 2 let it out but ya cant stay there. And when i look back on some of my crying moments. I didnt have to cry. i only cried because i wasnt thinking or rationalizing. I was emotionalizing things.
Just try 2 think without feeling so much. Be practical. And see what u come up with. I know thats hard but u can do it. Cancers can do anything they set out 2 do. we are very tenacious. IP: Logged |
Crabplanet
Newflake Posts: 11
From:
Registered: May 2009
|
posted May 03, 2007 08:57 PM
Diva, I'll try my best...I was very emotional yesterday I have to say + a full moon in Scorpio, that didn't help, I just felt deeply...more than usual...I think it was also related to many things that happened in the past between us, and so after not seeing him for 3 weeks and then going to see him for just watching him communicating with his computer, that was just too much for me, I just felt neglected again...and I'm not asking for much...so now I'm thinking that we are probably not meant to be together, it's always so complicated for him to find time for us. I'm not expecting anything...just like months ago...Thanks Diva. IP: Logged |
hippichick
Knowflake Posts: 3389
From:
Registered: May 2009
|
posted May 03, 2007 09:37 PM
CrabOne other hint---if you have Mars in Aqua, you may very well be attracted to Aqua types---and they may be attracted to you based on that one thing. It is an energy thing.... If you let this one go before learning the lessons of having a Mars in Aqua---another will come along... And do not forget, we attract to us what we are. My Mars is in Aqua, too with 4 other plantes, 3 opposed to Uranus himself so I know of this Uranian energy---it is un-relenting and does not give up... Blessings Terri IP: Logged |
Crabplanet
Newflake Posts: 11
From:
Registered: May 2009
|
posted May 03, 2007 11:36 PM
Hippi, my Mars forms an exact conjunction to his Sun + my NN is right on top of his Moon in Aqua. His Uranus forms another exact conjunction to my Sun in Cancer, for me this falls in my 7th house, for him in his 8th house (my Sun already forms a difficult square to my Uranus...). I know he is reflecting something back to me, something in him feels so familiar to me...IP: Logged |
Mama Mia
Knowflake Posts: 137
From:
Registered: Feb 2010
|
posted May 04, 2007 11:06 AM
Crabp: I get you I do, but sweetheart at some point in your life your going to have to stand up for yourself otherwise this will keep happening over and over. Aqua men need a strong women..That does not mean chop them up or tear them down but they need to be taken by the hand and led a certain way. They love to be stroked by a velvet glove with a iron fist. IF you get that. I was alot like you are honey did not want to hurt my Aqua's feelings but he was always hurting mine and never seem to give it a second thought. I stopped that..He admires it rather he tells me or not I can see it bc no one else would do it..They love to be put in their place especially when they are wrong, something about a woman that can do that to them and not care turns them on..You gonna have to learn how to express to him in a non emotional way that you deserve some consideration and so forth. Otherwise you are going to stay hurt and confused and so on and on.. And you can try and bail out but you know deep in your heart it hurts just as much to be away from him as it does to be with him when he treats you this way..YOu will attract another one like him until you figure out what work needs to be done on yourself.. Goodluck sweetie its call soul searching.. IP: Logged |
Crabplanet
Newflake Posts: 11
From:
Registered: May 2009
|
posted May 04, 2007 02:10 PM
Mama Mia, he will not change this for me, there is no reason why he would do it (strong charisma, very fix: Scorpio ascendant, Pluto in Leo opposing his Sun + Moon in Aqua, knows about his powers of attraction from all the feminine-people-bees who surround him, and yes they probably will never say anything like me...I just want at this point to be left alone, and pray for him not to reach out for me, there are thousands out there, why me???), he will find the right word to turn this into a weakness from my part, it is very disturbing...So thanks again Mama Mia for all your insights, but I'm just not strong like you, and so I'm going back inside my shell, it's much peaceful... IP: Logged |
Mama Mia
Knowflake Posts: 137
From:
Registered: Feb 2010
|
posted May 04, 2007 02:24 PM
Well you have to do you and I won't push you..But My Aqua same thing He too has Scopr Asc Mars in Taurus very,very fixed, but I love me way more then I love him and well I realize no matter how far I run or go the feelings of loving him will still be there. I am a Pisces and we can be very sensetive only we don't have a shell to retreat too. One day sweetie you will have to stand up for yourself or always be misunderstood and have hurt feelings..I am almost willing to bet that this is not over but you have to learn the process as I did..Mama Mia, he will not change this for me, there is no reason why he would do it. If he really loves you and does not want to lose you I bet you he would.. IP: Logged |
hippichick
Knowflake Posts: 3389
From:
Registered: May 2009
|
posted May 04, 2007 10:03 PM
CrabFollow your heart---you are very intuitive and if you feel this man will not change for you then I will bet he will not... As a matter of fact, I would bet he will not anyway---Aquas accept everybody for who they are so they expect everybody to accept them for who they are---fixed---they do not change especially for an emotional subject like "love." Keep this in mind, though, if you do let him go make darn well certain that you let him know under no uncertain terms that you are letting him go, else he will be back and back and back----again energy, when they feel you too close, in their psychic space, they bolt and when the feel you fleeing, they come back---ALWAYS!!! I would advise you to look deep into yourself what you see in this man that you do not like in you---we see in others what we know about ourselves....and what you do not like about him you do not like about you---explore your Mars in Aqua and then and only then will you be free--- Go deep into your shell, whatever sort of beautiful shell you have and search.... Blessings Terri IP: Logged |
hippichick
Knowflake Posts: 3389
From:
Registered: May 2009
|
posted May 04, 2007 10:23 PM
o...And I do not think that it takes so much a "strong" woman to love an Aqua, truely love an Aqua, as a woman unto herself---a woman who has a life of her own, a woman who is willing to accept the man for who he is with all of his human faults and love him anyway... I know this because my soul mate is an Aqua-we are not in a relationship, far from but we love eachother absolutely, totally unconditionally... Aqua love at it's finest~~~ IP: Logged |
Crabplanet
Newflake Posts: 11
From:
Registered: May 2009
|
posted May 04, 2007 11:34 PM
Hippi,Thanks. I'll make sure the words are clear, and it will not affect him in any negative way. I only wish him good things, and I wish him to find this beautiful and genuine soul, who will give him one day the 2 daughters he dreams so much of having. I'm already feeling much better, so yes, I'm following my intuition...
IP: Logged |
hippichick
Knowflake Posts: 3389
From:
Registered: May 2009
|
posted May 05, 2007 08:24 PM
Lovely Crab lady~~~You are a blessed and beautiful soul, and I know that you will attract someone into your life that will suit you as you wish!!! I hope you realize that you are truely, actually engaging in the purest type of Aquarian "love." The purest expression of "love" universally! Blessing and letting go--- What will be will be!!! Blessings to You~~~ Terri IP: Logged |
Mama Mia
Knowflake Posts: 137
From:
Registered: Feb 2010
|
posted May 07, 2007 09:48 AM
CrabP: Everyones journey and lessons are different. Do what you feel is best for you I told you that in the very begining of this thread. But if this is about you and not him (the lessons) you can let go over and over and over but you will one day have to face them. Aqua's may be fixed and not like to change but they can if they want and they will if it causes them some heartache or pain. I never thought that my Aqua would change either but again its much different today. And also saying you are leaving means nothing show with them show you just have to do that..Thankyou for thinking that I am strong I am hee,hee and to be honest that is what keeps us together well one of the things. I have somethings that he does not and he has some things that I don't. He admires the strength in me. We reflect each other but we are opposites too. Its not about changing a person ppl should be who they are. But I am not gone let a person hurt me over and over bc thats who they are. Nope. Somethings gone change be it me leaving or him learning how to treat me and being considerate of my feelings the choice was his..They can lack compassion sometimes.. You will figure some things out, just like I did. this is your walk..I hope you get strong.. IP: Logged |
Crabplanet
Newflake Posts: 11
From:
Registered: May 2009
|
posted May 07, 2007 01:11 PM
Mama Mia, You said they lacked compassion sometimes, I don't know if this applies to this Aqua, but what I know for sure that's exactly what I am working on right now: compassion, compassion I believe comes before any kind of passion...I am understanding this is not about him, about how I would want him to be with me, it is about me, my stressful Sun with Uranus, and how I'm replaying and replaying a scenario with men in which I try to get love from an emotionally detached father...I keep falling for Aqua men, hoping to get their attention, the affection I've been longing for all my life. I'm taking full responsibility on how this affects me. It's not his attitude, it's mine with myself, how I loved him so much (but I guess in a bad way)that I have allowed myself to be terribly neglected and hurt by his neglect of me. I'm also trying to be "friend" with Pluto who is standing right now right on top of my ascendant, I can feel the heavy transit, it's giving me the opportunity to examine and disolve all the psychological "garbage" that I"ve been keeping for so long...so right now it's all about transformation and resourcefulness, it's hard, I'm standing alone in this, and like I said, I will never hurt him and accuse him of anything, I only wish him good things... IP: Logged |
Mama Mia
Knowflake Posts: 137
From:
Registered: Feb 2010
|
posted May 07, 2007 01:32 PM
I understand and when you get you together all else will fall into place. From what you have said to me I think that he lacks compassion bc after all that you went through to spend time with him that evening he could not let go of what he was doing for 30 minutes to sit and eat with you and talk. Thats not being considerate of your feelings and I guess that was selfish as well. And if he had some compassion he would have never been able to do that to you..Anyway his lessons are his and yours are yours. But when some one really loves you they will turn it around if they realize that their behavior is hurting you Aqua or not..I am happy that you recognize certain things so that you can address it. I think that you will be ok once this is over and you will get whatever it is that you need to learn. I think Aqua men are perfect for teaching certain ppl lessons. I attract them to I guess due to my Moon,Venus, Merc and rising all in Aqua. But in my relationship we teach each other..So good for you sounds like your on your way.. Quote:
I have allowed myself to be terribly neglected and hurt by his neglect of me. Thats what I am talking about. How does he know that he is hurting you and neglecting you if you have not told him. And explaing to him how you feel is not accusing him. I was once told by a man always tell a man when he has done something to hurt you bc otherwise he will continue to do it over and over out of ignorance. I believe that. I have to speak up for myself..I have just learned how to do it in a non-confrontational way these days.. And for the record Crab, I went through a series of Saturn transits and stuff before I got to a good place with this..All these transits may look bad but it gets greater later..I encourage.. IP: Logged |
Crabplanet
Newflake Posts: 11
From:
Registered: May 2009
|
posted May 07, 2007 03:03 PM
Thanks Mama Mia. If you have any suggestion on the words that I could use to explain my pain, without offending him. I'm not good with words, I'm more of a visual type,...for the moment I just said that I needed to resolve some issues inside myself and that it was better for us not to see each other during this time, he didn't respond, and there was nothing to respond really...So if you have any ideas of how I could say this... IP: Logged |
Mama Mia
Knowflake Posts: 137
From:
Registered: Feb 2010
|
posted May 07, 2007 03:09 PM
CrabP: He did not respond bc he does not want to agree to that..He is thinking now..I can help you if you like..Email me when you are ready... Lovely_piscesprincess@yahoo.com.. IP: Logged |
Crabplanet
Newflake Posts: 11
From:
Registered: May 2009
|
posted May 07, 2007 04:23 PM
Mama Mia, I don't know what happened, I'm even sort of shaking, i can feel it in my legs...after i had finished writing you back, and asking for help, I felt it was really time for me to write him, with my own words even if I'm not too good at finding the exact words...but something came out...and so I sent it, it was very simple and clear: told him about how I felt without offending him or trying to make him feel guilty of anything. I'm just asking for an understanding from his part, he can now understand why I prefer for us to follow our own roads, wishing him good things, really I think it was explained with a lot of compassion from my part...Feeling better... IP: Logged |
Mama Mia
Knowflake Posts: 137
From:
Registered: Feb 2010
|
posted May 07, 2007 04:40 PM
Ok well thats good...Its a start, he's not gone give up, especially if he is anything like my Aqua..They never give up..LOL!! I use to be scared and tremble like you. I use to wonder why in the world am I afraid of this man..He was afraid of me too just hid it very well..You guys need to have a real heart to heart talk. There is alot of misunderstandings and confusion that perhaps needs to be cleared up..I hope that you guys get that chance atleast, I bet you will feel better after that. Keep me posted on this. And you can email me whenever you like on my personal email.. IP: Logged |
Crabplanet
Newflake Posts: 11
From:
Registered: May 2009
|
posted May 07, 2007 05:08 PM
Thanks again Mama Mia, for the moment all is silent...no response...IP: Logged |
Mama Mia
Knowflake Posts: 137
From:
Registered: Feb 2010
|
posted May 07, 2007 05:16 PM
Your welcome sweetie. If he does not repond right away don't get discouraged or upset bc he is processing things. I am glad that you are trying to work through this rather it leads to something or not. YOU need to do this for yourself. And if it was that easy to walk away then you would have done that long time ago, I know that you have been dealing with this for awhile, I remember. I know you want a peace of mind and will come as soon..IP: Logged |
Crabplanet
Newflake Posts: 11
From:
Registered: May 2009
|
posted May 07, 2007 08:30 PM
Thanks Mama Mia. I do pray so much for this peace of mind, for me and also for him...like I told him, I want him to be happy, I'm not asking for anything, just peace...I also apologized for loving him the way I loved him, the love I have in my heart is big and generous, I give , I give, and I don't regret it, I just told him that the next time if he really falls deeply in love, to just not to be afraid to show his true love, sincere love to the other...I'll probably won't hear from him soon...I said we couldn't continue like this, I'm hurting myself, inflicting myself too much pain, so I apologized again for this, never meant to hurt him, told him that I knew one day this special person will come in his life and give him the 2 daughters he dreams so much of having, that day he should take good care of this love... IP: Logged |
Lindaland
UBBFriend: Email This Page to Someone! 
