posted May 29, 2007 05:00 PM            

quote:

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Finally, guard against an assumption. There were issues and poems that you raised and discussed that I did not address. Because I did not address them does not mean that you were/are correct or that you understood anything clearly. If I were to address every distortion of your understanding, I would be here the rest of the afternoon.

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You may assume that the same appears to be the case from where I am standing in regards to you.

quote:

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Past a certain point, one will either see the error of ones ways and engage in correction, or one will not. If the latter is the case, no words in heaven, earth, by Saint or God will shake him from his error. Inshahallah you will not be thus.

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God cannot shake him from his "error", because, first of all, there is no error, and, second of all, he would not resist your instruction unless it were God's will. When the rose is ready to bloom, the wind may easily peel its petals. A rose that is not ready to bloom is not in error, however it may frustrate the wind. In truth, there is nothing more ignorant than to blame a man for being ignorant, and nothing more unconscious than to hold a man's level of consciousness against him. If you would be a true lover of God, my friend, you must learn to embrace His children, even at their present level of development, and not push them further away, according to the degree of guidance they require. This is where I'm coming from.

quote:

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Peace and Blessings

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Thank you. To you as well.

posted May 30, 2007 02:51 AM              

Peace and Blessings,

Thank you for your thoughtful responses. You were more polite than you could have been. Any effort is most appreciated of course and I take this as a blessing.

I enjoyed our exchange and I wish you well on your journey.

May the light of the Prophets illuminate your Way.

posted May 30, 2007 03:11 AM              

The English equivalent of inshahallah is God willing

posted June 01, 2007 08:11 AM              

quote:

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Lake DanceKnowflake
Posts: 205From:
Registered: May 2007
posted May 19, 2007 12:25 AM
Because the computers here where I'm using one are getting goofy again, so, reluctantly, after a couple of consecutive posting failures, I am splitting my original post into a few:BrightStar,I realize you didn't ask me. But if you asked me, I'd say that picture means nothing associating with HSC whatsoever (but of course HSC would not need my being a bit nosy here, whether I'm acting as though I'm defending him or I'm acting as though I'm just self-seeking, looking for yet another meaningless fight), and that picture is disgusting to the extreme, has no basic human respect whatsoever, and is simply not anything that can represent HSC, I can tell you. Forgive me for being nosy, it's just my Mars conj Asc making me inclined to be a bit impulsive, impatient etc etc. And let me remind you, I ain't gonna waste my time dealing with flamboyant, lifeless double-talkers. Oh, I don't mean you, my fellow readers here. I mean, I'll just ignore them as I pass by LakeIP: Logged

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You have done this so many times I have lost count. I posted a picture to HSC and you insulted it, but it was directed at me just like your sly attacks at Lexigram Magic. You do not need to say my name for anyone to know who you are attacking.
So what new game are you playing this time?
Got your vicious buddy backing you again?
Sure looks like it.
Pulling your strings or are you being a rude and insulting jerk all by yourself this time?

Silverstone
Yeah she has been going all over and trying to make herself look good by deleting her many vile attacking posts.
I had hoped she had changed but I see she has not.

posted June 01, 2007 10:41 AM            

I sympathize with your feelings in that this is personal for you.
But I have some different thoughts on the matter.

You assume her motive is to look good,
but how do you know her motive is not to be good?
Have you never lost your temper, and thought better of it?
How would you like to have all your worst moments copy/pasted for you,
and exhibited for all to see,
every time you have second thoughts and try to delete them?

Try to imagine what it must be like to have Mars conjunct the Ascendant.
You would constantly shoot first, ask questions later,
and, frequently, you would change your direction
after taking time to reflect.

I have no issue with anyone deleting nasty comments.
I'm all for it, regardless of the motive.
What I have a problem with is people reposting those comments
after they have been deleted.
If they are so offensive, why repost them?
Why not breathe a sigh of relief that they are off the boards?

The impression I get of Lake Dance is that she is trying very hard,
and that she does have a temper,
which creates at least as many stumbling blocks for her
as it does for you or anyone else.
Now she has gone back and tried to clear the road,
and you have taken the block she took out of the road
and put it right back there, to spite her,
saying, "Oh no you dont! Look, look what she did!"

Why dont you check to see if she has a hall pass while you're at it?

I dont know about everyone else, but it doesnt make me feel safe to know that Big Brother Fayte is out there policing our thoughts, copying all our posts, and filing them away to use against us at some opportune moment - like, say, when we are trying to make improvements.

I understand not wanting someone to get away with a negative action,
but, god, you wont let her get away with a positive action either, will you?

Tell you what, how about you go around now and find every nice thing she ever said, and paste it up here beside the negative things she said in haste (and later decided to edit out)? Then maybe we can begin to get a full picture of her. Like its any of our business anyway.

Second option: You can leave her alone, let her do what she wants with her own words, and let her receive positive energy from our fellow knowflakes, whether you deem her worthy of it or not. Personally, I think no one is more deserving of positive energy that the people who need it most. But, thats me.

In any case, I can't even see what she said that was so wrong here. She didnt like the picture you posted. That was just a matter of taste, and she has every right to express her opinion on that, even if it is extremely unflattering. I found the pic a little tacky myself, but I found your intention breathtakingly beautiful and pure, and that is what affected me most, and what I chose to respond to. Maybe Lake Dance realized that the intention was what mattered?

What insult is in there? "flamboyant, lifeless double-talkers"?? Was that really directed at you? Because I, for one, did not know it until you suggested it yourself. And, as I said, I still just see it as a momentary loss of composure, and I think she thought better of it, and that is why she deleted it.

I definitely do not get the impression that LD is looking after her reputation. For one thing, she is an Aquarius, and for another thing, I've hardly ever seen anything from her that wasnt controversial and likely to cause a fuss with someone. I think there are two important questions here: Is she pretending or trying to be better than she is? If the latter, we cannot fault her for that, but, should encourage her for it. The second question: Is it any of our business, anyway? Maybe this should be the first question. Personally, I'm not sure it is our business.

If you feel a need to publicly acknowledge her edits and deletions, why not thank her for, apparently, thinking better of what she had written, and doing the right thing by changing it? Our souls are evolving every day, Fayte. They are not set in stone, and neither should our posts be. I encourage anyone to edit, re-edit, and re-re-edit any nastiness out of their posts the very moment they become aware of it.

Now, just to be fair, let's repeat some of the words you just used to describe her and her posts, shall we? Let's see, there's "silly" "nasty" "insulting" "degrading" "very bad" "sly" "attacking" "vile" (I've always found that word particularly positive, havent you?) "rude" and "jerk". And then there's her "vicious" buddy, whoever that is, whom you suggest may be pulling her strings (so, you essentially called her a "puppet", for reasons I cannot discover). How would you feel if these things were directed at you? Could you forgive them for any reason at all? Are they any better than "flamboyant, lifeless double-talkers", or any of the other things you are so intent on crucifying LD for?

quote:

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I had hoped she had changed but I see she has not.

---

Progress is not linear, Fatye. We all have relapses, and we will all continue to have them. What shows our progress is not that we never fall, but, that we keep trying, we keep getting up again. You know this. The thing to do is not to hold her down when she tries to get up, so that everyone can see that she fell, and get a good look at her when she's down, and have a laugh or two at her expense, or to tell her that she is only being herself when she is falling. Those are both serious distortions. I'm confident that you will see the truth in this once you have calmed down a little and set your personal feelings in perspective. You always do. And so does Lake Dance.

hsc

posted June 01, 2007 11:46 AM            

I am not judging you any more than I am judging LD.

I have love for you, and I admire you,
for so much of what you've been through,
and so many of the kind things I've heard you say.

I really think you are wonderful.

These situations arise from time to time,
and they do not alter my opinions of people
nearly as much as you might think.

We are all just thinking and feeling,
reacting and learning from these experiences.

I may be mistaken in this matter.
But what I have written is how it appears to me so far.
I have not intentionally twisted anything.
If you are going to accuse me of that,
you ought to give examples.

love to you,
s

posted June 01, 2007 01:21 PM              

Any forgiveness or "moving on" or "letting go" that people say happens overnight is phoney. They are only saying that to make themselves appear more spiritual than actually any human being truly is inside. It takes time for wounds to heal and everyone is different in how much time it takes. Some wounds run deeper than others.

Fayte has been nice to LD on her return, only to be ignored by her and that doesn't exactly instill trust in Fayte to have her kindness received that way. Still, in private, Fayte has revealed that she is open to possible changes in DFD ( LakeDance). She is hopeful of that and willing to give LakeDance a chance as am I and Lia. Fayte doesn't trust LakeDance and with very good reason. I don't trust LakeDance and neither does Lia and we have very good reason not to trust her too. I told LakeDance that I don't trust her but am willing to give her a chance. That has been Fayte's stance and Lia's as well. We are all willing to give LD the space she needs to grow and change.

I mean really, do you trust those who have hurt you badly in the past? Does anyone? Because when someone hurts us badly trust is destroyed and trust is a very important thing in any relationship or acquaintance.

Hard for you to judge the situation HSC, or even be fair when you don't really know the whole story and you were not on the receiving end of a thread designed to tear you down because DFD did not like the way in which Fayte tried to help her.

This is what I mean by people, unaware of the whole story, jump onto threads attempting to be "peacemakers." Why can't you just let LakeDance and Fayte work it out themselves?

I will remind you here of your words on my tongue in cheek post during that across the boards character smear of myself and Lia in Dec. by DFD and SueG, "Tar and Feather Mirandee."

In that thread you gave your excuse for not saying anything through that whole thing when the attack was on a very good friend of yours at the time, Lialei. Your excuse or reason for not getting involved was that " if I take someone's side it means that I am against someone else."

Since you said that you came on a thread at astrology and took adrienne's side in a disagreement she was having with Slayer and now you are taking LD's side against Fayte. Whether you are aware of that or not. Sorry, but inconsistencies like that just jump out at me. Although, honestly, they don't always just jump out at me when I am inconsistent. Takes more time with myself.

So, in taking sides in both of those incidents you are not being consistent with your words. Which proves that anyone, even LakeDance, is very capable of saying anything but doing the opposite. That is the position that those whom LakeDance has hurt keep in mind. What she says on the boards is one thing. So we wait to see if she does the opposite. Mainly because in the past she has done the opposite.

People who delete their words or posts are people who don't want to be held responsible for their words or accountable for their actions. I have regretted many of my words here at LL but I have NEVER deleted any of them. If those words were later deemed by me to be wrong, they still stand because I take responsibility for them if I later regret them. You making excuses and speaking for LakeDance in giving her motives for deleting her words does not change that fact.

If you, HSC, are willing to give LakeDance ( the attacker ) the time and space she needs, at least give Fayte (the victim ), that same consideration without taking sides in something you know little about. Mainly I think it is just that on her return LakeDance has lavished you with flattery and attention that you are now lecturing Fayte on her behalf.

posted June 01, 2007 01:29 PM              

To continue to bring Lake Dance up, someone who has confessed to being mentally ill, not of their right Mind, is just vindictive, hurting them on purpose, bringing it up everyday, that's exactly what the dark forces want you to do, they don't want you to forgive, or turn the other cheek, they want you to behave just as that person has, they hurt you, now you hurt them.

What a grave waste of time, to not forgive and release this negative energy, instead you feed feed feed it,
Makes NO Sense to me. ...

LOve and Reverence to ALL... .

posted June 01, 2007 04:00 PM            

I appreciate you taking the time to share your thoughts, and I understand that the issue is both subtle and emotionally loaded. I disagree with some of the things you said, and here are my thoughts:

First of all, I am giving Fayte time. I said that I believe she will think and feel differently after she has had some time to calm down. I am not judging her. I am disagreeing with her (more or less provisionally on most points), and sharing an alternative point of view. If Lake Dance had been the last to post, and had said similar things, I would be defending Fayte. That's something you never seem to understand about me. In fact, as I see the issue, I am defending Fayte. My words could just as easily be directed at Lake Dance, and that should give you some idea of where I am coming from.

I try to take the side of truth, regardless of who is aligned with it at any given time. I keep my eyes peeled, because I find that truth is elusive and changes sides every few posts, sentences, or words. Often truth is on neither side.

You brought up the thing with Slayer and Adrienne... You tell me not to talk about something I don't know all about, but you can talk about this because "it jumped right out at [you]", eh? So, okay, let's talk about it and see what jumps out. I was in a position to defend Adrienne to Slayer because I am friends with Adrienne, yes, but that is not why I defended her. What I mean is, the disagreement between them never would have come to my attention in the first place if Adrienne hadnt mentioned it to me during a friendly chat (as is the case with the majority of skirmishes around here that i do not hear about). I was curious and I read the thread and made up my own mind about it. I stand by what I wrote there. I'm sure I was right. In that case, I perceived that the truth was with Adrienne. She had not been rude, made insinuations, or called anyone names. As I recall, Adrienne presented her opinion humbly (remarking that it "seemed"), and if she did anything vaguely offensive, it was that she used the word "phony" (this is actually what Slayer objected to, and felt justified to defend with serious accusations about Adrienne's character, which Adrienne never felt the need to defend herself against by making a reply) to refer to a course of action (recommended by Slayer) which might otherwise have been more delicately termed "disingenous", - but which, by no means could be termed "honest", as Slayer was claiming; Slayer basically said, to put it in my own words, "I hate games, I don't play games, but here are the games I play, how I play them, and why you should too." But that is splitting hairs and, in my opinion, asking too much of anyone. Bottom line, the situation had not escalated to the point where truth had gotten up and walked away from both sides, as it appeared to have done in the instance you are referring to, in which I refused to comment on the particulars. Also, the latter situation was very complex, had been going on for a long time, involved a lot of people, and was utterly loaded emotionally. I felt that no attempt to speak impartially would be heard, and that the wisest thing to do would be to advise silence and then remain silent myself.

That you would even suggest that I am motivated by personal interest in defending Lake Dance is absurd, and I think most people can see that. I have more feelings of personal interest divested in Lia and Fayte any day of the week. That is not the issue, and never has been with me. But you have never understood me, or what it means to be Aquarian. A far more likely distortion of my motives would be that I was tempted to do this as a means of thwarting my personal interests by self-destructive (Scorpio) impulses, or, in order to prove to myself that I am not ruled by personal interest (Aquarian). You want to speculate on my motives? This is just one area where you should know I will school you, Mirandee. I do this for a livelihood. Frankly, I can speculate on more ulterior motives than you can make assumptions on. It's like you see one remotely possible ulterior motive and automatically assume that must be it, while I see a dozen, and still recognize the limits of my vision.

Now, you may be right that I am speaking too soon, as regards a few of my points in this present case (and I have said so myself), but concerning what is most essential in my post, I believe that no degree of familiarity with the facts would sway me. The essence of my message is love and understanding, and it is universally valid, whether or not the particular attempts I made to understand were accurate or not in this particular case. If I am wrong about Lake Dance, I would imagine that when she reads what I have written she will probably be ashamed of herself. Maybe not. However, I know without a doubt that, whether I am right or wrong, when she reads what Fayte has written she will only be angered and baited into more of the behavior you say you want to discourage her from.

You ask me about trust. I do not trust anyone, and I expect anything. As a Plutonian, I am not greatly surprised by anything. Technically speaking, I do not trust or have faith in anyone. Instead, I make myself vulnerable to everybody, without thought of the outcome. I do this naturally because the alternative is something utterly foreign to my way of being. If I am dealt harshly with by someone, I will tell them that I believe they have treated me unjustly, I will give reasons to that effect, and, if they continue the behavior, I will end the connection and proceed to avoid that individual. This, to my mind, is a mature way to deal with such situations. Name-calling, etc., is not on the side of truth, as I see it, regardless of who started it.

I really dont think I have any illusions about Lake Dance. If its true that she is more concerned with appearing good than being good, that would not surprise me. But it doesnt mean anything. Who cares? You know? Let her appear however she wants to, what difference does it make? She herself will know the truth, and that is what matters. If she must take pains to hide the truth from others, she must also see it for herself.

I can understand the objection that, when a person edits, it disrupts the context of the thread, and makes other people's words appear unprovoked. I think, in such cases, the person who edits ought to make a note to that effect in the editted post - for instance: "I was rude in this post, and I chose to edit it out when I realized my mistake." That would be considerate of others. If the person does not leave a note like this, I would suggest posting, maybe even starting a thread, if you feel it is necessary, to point out the fact that this person has editted some rude remarks, and the context has been disrupted. That would be as far as I would go with it.

As regards peacemaking. I am a peacemaker. Born in the year of the Earth Horse ("the peacemaker") with Sun and Midheaven conjunct Venus, and Jupiter in the 7th house. When I see inflammatory language being used, I will speak out against it. I do not need to look into the matter more deeply to know that much is right. It is not necessary to convince me that the words were provoked. Remember, I am a determinist; in my eyes, everything is provoked and justified. Sympathy, with me, is a given. It requires no explaination whatsoever. Still, I have my part to play, and that means speaking out against what I see as not being in accordance with the highest truth. What is done is done. I cannot fault anyone for what is done. That is not the purpose for which I speak. But, to change what may be in the future, that is why I speak. Not to judge and abuse, but to remind and instruct.

Saying one thing and doing the opposite is probably the most common of faults, and you are absolutely right to expect that anyone can be guilty of it. Hence the old adage, "Easier said than done,". It has to be this way, and it is no shock to me. We speak from our ideals, and we still act from our present level of development. Nothing is more common, or more blameless. But, realize, the opposite is also true. How often have we spoken ill of ourselves, or voiced some cruel intention or fancy, only to show by our actions something more noble in our character? We are dynamic beings, and that is the truth. You cannot denounce one part of who a person is as an impostor on the charge that is it not all that we are. We are all making liars out of ourselves constantly. Such is life.

"[The way is like a tightrope held just a few inches off the ground,
and it is not meant to be walked upon,
but to trip us up.]"
- Franz Kafka

No one can be perfect, Mirandee. No one can walk the razor's edge. But I see people, on this side and on that, wanting to tar and feather eachother (oh and by the way, if I made a comment "tar and feather, mirandee" I assure you was intended to be just as ironic and sarcastic as it sounds) for trying, and for every little misstep they make in the attempt. It's not right no matter who does it.

You are of course free to edit out your nasty remarks, or leave them up in the name of responsibility, if you wish. I do not see the logic in that myself. And, lucky for you, I am certainly not going to waste my time and energy reproducing here all the nasty things you have said so that you may eat your words, and prove to us all how terribly eager you are to take responsibility for them.

Lake Dance could be some criminal mastermind for all I know or care. What I want to know is, why does it matter to you? Why does it matter who believes what about Lake Dance? And, lastly, what exactly do you expect to accomplish by encouraging in each other the very same mean-spiritedness which you object to when she exhibits it?

That's all I have to say.

HSC

posted June 01, 2007 06:04 PM              

There is just no cause here to make Fayte appear to be the bad guy because she can't be phoney like some folks around here and pretend that she is a saint and immediately forgives and never thinks about past hurts. She could just not speak out about what is taking place now in the pretense it doesn't tick her off but again, she is too honest to do that.

Fayte, personally I think you should go on all the threads where LD is deleting posts and putting up angels and goofy faces and delete your posts and put up your kitty cat picture on all your deleted posts. You know which one I mean.

No one here should object to you doing that to LD since they feel it is okay for LD to do it to you. Besides, being the saints and as holy as they are they would just immediately forgive you and not bring it up at all.

posted June 01, 2007 06:29 PM              

quote:

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Fayte, personally I think you should go on all the threads where LD is deleting posts and putting up angels and goofy faces and delete your posts and put up your kitty cat picture on all your deleted posts. You know which one I mean.

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Yes I do wish the best for DfD. You and Lia know that very well. Even when she was attacking you two and I was so very angry I stayed out of it and told you both she has repeatedly admitted to be suffering from mental illness. Yeah, it still was wrong and cruel and uncalled for. But that is what it means to be mentally ill.
So as much as she angers me I still feel compassion and like Mr.Nash in "A Beautiful Mind".....who suffered from the same illness as DfD, there is indeed hope for her.
And Lotus, if I was the unforgiving type I would have written you off long ago, but I have not. You attacked me and Lisa and Mirandee before. You get pee ohed and still do at times. But then you calm down. So as I have long forgiven you, I have forgiven DfD.
But when folks keep going at one, that one cannot help but feel angry and think...oh doodah, it is freaking happening again! Like Gee Whiz! How many times must I apologize and or make peace and forgive this or that person?
After awhile believing in change in the person begins to become more a wish than an actual possibility in one's mind.
And worse yet are the ones who go sorry sorry sorry and then joke ha ha ha about being mean and cruel and blame it on PMS or PMT or the devil made them do it. Bah! That is utterly a lie and a cop out! And when people keep apologizing over and over after repeatedly doing the same kind of mean things, I feel they are not honest or a pathological liar with no real moral sense of socially correct behaviour. Mentally ill or sane and enjoying chaos? Who knows?
I hope that made sense.
I have not given up on you Lotus.
You can be quite fun and interesting and even charming when you wish to be so!

posted June 01, 2007 08:52 PM              

quote:

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Heart--Shaped Cross
Moderator
Posts: 4249
From: 11/6/78 11:38am Boston, MA
Registered: Aug 2004
posted June 01, 2007 10:41 AM
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Fayte,
I sympathize with your feelings in that this is personal for you.
But I have some different thoughts on the matter.

You assume her motive is to look good,
but how do you know her motive is not to be good?
Have you never lost your temper, and thought better of it?
How would you like to have all your worst moments copy/pasted for you,
and exhibited for all to see,
every time you have second thoughts and try to delete them?

---

Lake/DFD whatever you want to call yourself, you need to grow up and realize that you have that choice to turn it all around.

People need to stop making excuses and start taking responsibility for their own actions...

***Edited to add*** I do wish the best for DFD/Lake... But I do hope that she continues with her treatment

Lotus...

quote:

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lotusheartone
Knowflake
Posts: 10788
From: piopolis, quebec canada
Registered: Jul 2005
posted June 01, 2007 01:29 PM
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
It is not difficult to forgive immediately, I do it everyday, I will not hold onto any of the negative things done to me.
To continue to bring Lake Dance up, someone who has confessed to being mentally ill, not of their right Mind, is just vindictive, hurting them on purpose, bringing it up everyday, that's exactly what the dark forces want you to do, they don't want you to forgive, or turn the other cheek, they want you to behave just as that person has, they hurt you, now you hurt them.

---

posted June 02, 2007 10:58 AM            

quote:

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how much more crap is Fayte supposed to take? There's a limit to everything

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I sympathize, believe me, I do. I am not judging Fayte for how she deals with this. I figure there are two sides to everything: There's the ideal - the perfect response to a situation, and then there's the real - the realistic response to a situation. I see the validity of the second, but I see myself as having been put here to give expression to both; and where the awareness of one is lacking, I will voice the other. The more we keep them both in mind, the more often the ideal and the real become one.

"I do not say,
forgive your neighbor seven times,
or even seventy times, -
but seventy times seventy."
- J of N

We are human, we have limits. I get this. More than anyone on these boards, perhaps, because I am a hard determinist, I get this. In my mind, a human being is something which is literally defined by its limits. But the work of the spiritual life is precisely to push those limits, and we are very lucky to have someone like Lake Dance here to help us push those limits, in my opionion. When Fayte feels overwhelmed, as I'm sure she does, from time to time, the ideal thing to do is not to compose a post to Lake Dance, but, to take some time to relax and reflect. Things only build up and reach a breaking point if we do not take responsibility for releasing the negativity. We can try to put that on Lake Dance, and demand that she cease being negative, but this is neither ideal nor realistic. And if we do it in a way that reflects her negativity back to her, then we are just feeding the fire we say we want to extinguish.

I'm not asking Fayte to be a saint, and I would never judge her for responding in a way that was less than saintly, but, I'm still going to post on this topic and tell her what I believe the saintly thing to do would be, just so she knows. And then she can decide how far she wants to move in that direction, or how determined she is to express something else. Only Fayte knows what her limits are, and what is in her power.

What I will not do is agree that responding in a mean-spirited way is warranted and just. That I will not do. We are all children, all struggling. It seems to me that the people who are struggling the most are also occassioning (I do not say "causing", because I do not believe in that) the most difficulty for others, and, consequently, receiving the most backlash from others. These are the people who need the most help. When you tell me, "we have TRIED, over and over again to help her," you tell me nothing new. This goes without saying. This kind of work takes time. Maybe you didnt know that, but I did.

It is not Lake Dances fault if you (or Fayte, or Lia, or Mirandee) thought it would be easy to help her, and are now throwing it in her face when you discover that its real work helping someone who is mentally ill (as she has stated she is). You cant self-appoint yourself as someone's savior and then blame them when you discover that you are no Jesus Christ, and they really do need more than you can give. I see this stuff all the time. If you are not extremely well balanced when you try to rescue a drowning person, don't be surprised if they pull you down into the water with them. And don't go around blaming them for doing what is natural to a person in that condition. You knew they needed help. Now, you want to blame them for being worse off than you thought they were; for needing more help!

I know probably nobody will understand what I'm saying. I can already see the responses, telling me how Lake Dance has to take personal responsibility, etc., etc. This is one of the oldest stories in the book. Bottom line is, we are asking, nay, demanding, her to take responsibility for us. If we are so high on personal responsibility, lets practice it ourselves, instead of demanding it from others. Yes, it would be wonderful if Lake Dance became Mother Teresa on demand, but that is not likely, and calling her names is definitely NOT going to speed up the process. I don't expect Fayte to be Mother Teresa either. Fayte and Lake Dance can go on like this for the next 6 months for all I care, and if thats how long it takes them to learn detachment. These little dramas are the most common thing in the world. We can go on blaming eachother, and slinging the mud from one side to the other and back again for an eternity. We can go on justifying our personal and emotional reactions with arguments that begin with "But she did this," and so on, or, we can learn to breathe, relax, detach, and respond in a spiritually mature way. That is what this is about.

Yes, we all have our breaking points, but we dont have to stay broken. It doesnt matter how many times our kindness is rejected, silverstone. Like it or not, this is a journey, and it is eternal; there is no destination. We give and give and give, and if people don't give back, so be it. That's not why we give. Or is it? We need to learn to give for its own sake, and not for the sake of some other reward. You may not see the positive results of your good deeds, but, believe me, they are there. When the roots are dried up, it takes a lot of watering before the fruit starts to show. So, you couldnt heal Lake Dance in a week, or even a month - must be her fault, right? Wrong. This sh!t takes time. Take a break, if you need one.

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Cappy Ascendant