posted July 14, 2009 09:35 PM         

She needs a clean slate--it sounds like the people around her kind of think she's a sad-sack--weight problem, never been kissed, computer addictions, not many friends. Sometimes a side of us like that can come out around family--I feel like when I was a young teen my stepmother's family only saw that side of me--not exactly that, but back in my real life I was popular and funny and wanted by guys and adored, and I felt like SHE saw me as awkward and too shy and weird.

It sounds like your sister is sort of chafing against her current life situation and would love to be in a whole other life. My hope is that she can find a new, independent, happy life and this guy will just have been a catalyst, and he won't last long.

And it sounds like you could do with some exploring of the world out of the context of your worries about your sister, her hostility toward you, and your guilt for your (150% understandable) resentment at her hostility.

posted July 15, 2009 11:23 PM         

i have reservations about enlightened "masters" but i found the content very interesting, in light of the energy around here lately, and that crappy feeling may be due to something real but it also ties in to the "message"...

posted July 16, 2009 07:11 PM         

The part that is hard is she got it from someone she loved very much who was cheating on her, so it always reminds her of that.

With holistic preventive treatments and good stress management, apparently you can go for years and years with no outbreaks. And the fact that it forces you into safer sex practices can end up being a blessing, protecting you from other, much more dangerous STDs.

posted July 22, 2009 03:01 PM         

Sounds like Greece is the ticket!

posted August 20, 2009 07:53 AM         

quote:

---

I have come to a decision with some career options. I'm going to complete my bachelors in acting then go to school for vet tech or photojournalism, whichever comes first. the vet tech is a "secure" job that I know I wouldn't mind doing for the rest of my life. Hence my picking it.

---

This sounds really sensible to me. Well done you. Do you feel better for having come to a decision?

And as for your sister situation. I tend to agree with Lucia on this one. Frustrating as it is when you can see your sister clearly and she doesn't ask for advice - perhaps she feels you are not the best person to ask. This is not a comment on your helpful abilities which I have seen from what you write are just fine. It may be that you're too closely connected, and she feels she needs to plough her own furrow. I see it with my sister too. Sometimes she is the last person who I should confide in, it's too suffocating for me. So even though it's frustrating because you can see what a douche he is/potentially is, sometimes you have to be allowed to make your own mistakes.

You really need to look after you right now. That's not selfishness, you have your own stuff to sort out and you are in a transitional place. You know, maybe you will grow to be closer one day. It happens. But like Kat says, being twins looks hard. Maybe for now you have to accept the fact that your relationship with her is difficult, wish her well and be there if she ever does need to talk.

You're doing great, just for the record. Ok? I am pleased you've made some moves to figure out education and the like. You will have a ball doing it most likely. Things will change and horizons will get broader. You're a sweetheart. Keep the faith.

Crete eh? I went there when I finished my graduate studies in 1997. I was so whacked out with exhaustion I just spent it on the beach eating souvlaki, which is not like me at all. I had plans to visit Knossos and everything, didn't happen. Stunning island. Glad you had a good time there.

I was thinking of things Greek this morning. Don't know why. I was thinking of the Temple of Apollo at Delphi, the inscriptions there that read "Know Thyself" and "Nothing in Excess". Pretty much don't need to live by any other mottos really huh? Wise old Greeks.

posted August 24, 2009 04:55 PM         

all you can really do is be there for her, like you are, and let her come to you when she is in need of hugs, or whatever. it's a hard situation to be in, but you sound like you are doing a pretty good job of it or she wouldn't have come to you...