posted October 13, 2011 01:21 AM            

quote:

---

as for the uranus/moon person i talked about
don't know if even reaching out to them would do anything
or if it would do them any good
if they'll even be open to what i have to say

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Tuxedomask- Maybe reaching out to that particular moon/uranus person won't do any good, but I will say that what you have written has resonated with me. I myself have Moon trine Uranus, and actually it has only been recently that I have realized exactly how much it is that I detach from my own feelings and how much of a detriment it is for EVERYONE ELSE.

You see, this comment:

quote:

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i think that for anyone dealing with someone who has a placement like that, should be aware that thye're not to expect any sort of equality in the relationship.. to the native, all partners are pretty much toys to be dismissed once they've fulfilled their purpose and nothing else.

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is not entirely true... For me personally (I can't speak for anyone else), I think that there is a sense that my emotions could hurt others, so I'd rather withdraw and walk away instead of risk hurting the other person. In some ways, this has always seemed to me like it would only hurt ME and NOT the other person, but the way you speak, I can definitely tell that is not true.

Honestly, I've been recently realizing this same lesson too through my heavy pluto/Scorpio friend and the way he has been reacting. Both my Pisces friend and my Scorpio friend have been, in essence, reconnecting me to my emotions in the way that I communicate (because I am often not aware of it). My Pisces friend decided to start pointing out when I was being dismissive. When I complained to him that he and the Scorpio had been ganging up on me, he simply looked at me and said: "But that's because we know that you can do better. You can do better."

posted October 13, 2011 01:15 PM            

i relate to alot of it.

posted October 14, 2011 01:11 AM            

Uranus/Moon will (I feel) always need time to collect themselves emotionally in some way after being vulnerable because there's a strong individualistic streak. If the person doesn't know how to take ME time, they will maybe come off very detached since they do not yet know how to balance alone with intimate. Or they will do the opposite - as I used to do - be very clingy one minute, and then completely shut down the next (and internally wonder what the hell is going on).
My fiance is also a Moon/Uranus person....we always give space automatically, and come together. Having conjunct moons also helps tho Or maybe it makes it worse since we are highly attuned to this aspect. I think just acceptance and general respect has worked well....along with being actually committed to each other (interesting this man, the only one who has been able to hang with my Moon/Uranus is an Aqua stellium. Never tries to challenge it, just to understand and then accepts easily since he gets it but more importantly, is just not about game-playing. This aspect can create game playing or completely cut it out. Doesn't seem to be much of a middle ground.

posted October 14, 2011 01:40 AM            

I didn't know how to explain it, but I've had those feelings of embarrassment after some sort of emotional scene/situation. If you're right there with me when I'm upset, or something, then I think I respond appropriately, but I have trouble dealing with that sympathy when I've separated myself from that feeling - at least for a while.

posted October 14, 2011 10:26 AM            

Oh, Uranus opposite Moon by the way. Even worse, Moon is in Gemini.

posted October 14, 2011 12:38 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by LakiSG03:
I came across a really interesting article about people with hard aspects to their Moon and Uranus.
My Virgo Moon squares my Sagittarius Uranus, and the description nailed it! I've had a tendency to pull away in relationships in fear of suffocation and monotony. As much as I want to get close, I can't allow myself to get too close. I need room to breathe. Does anyone else with this placement experience that?

I also have a Sun in Cancer, Asc in Aries, Venus in Gemini and Mars in Cancer. So maybe those aspects to Uranus also have an impact.

Here's what the article says:

The Moon is the heart of the natal chart. When a person needs security, they turn inward to its familiar, intimate energy. It represents childhood and mother. Its element is water. Any feelings (or lack thereof) in love relationships will be decided by the condition of the natal Moon.

Uranus in the natal chart is responsible for upheaval. Its energy comes from a distant place, blasting away the things that need to be changed. It represents anything new, innovative or shocking. Its element is air. It is the universal alarm clock.

Anytime the Moon makes an aspect to Uranus in the natal chart, the emotional and the detached are combined. A good illustration of this is the moment of birth: the infant is yanked from its safe, watery environment and feels the awakening slap of cold air. What does this mean for the Moon-Uranus person in a relationship?

It helps to understand where the Moon-Uranus person is coming from. The Moon in any hard aspect (conjunction, opposition, square) to Uranus can indicate a traumatic event in childhood where security was ripped away. A quick word about aspects: I am focusing on hard aspects because they indicate trauma more than the harmonious trines and sextiles. Although all Moon-Uranus aspects will have a similar theme, the way the energies interact will vary according to the aspect. In a square, the two planets are butting heads. The opposition has the two planets at opposite ends of a table shouting at each other. The conjunction is the two in an uneasy dance where both partners try to lead.

The Moon-Uranus child’s response to trauma was deciding not to trust in emotional safety ever again. As an adult, this memory is carried into relationships. The Moon-Uranus person feels and acts like a detached outsider, reluctant to form any long-term bonds. They can develop an uncompromising attitude in relationships as a way of protecting themselves, deciding on the level of freedom and commitment without discussing things with their partner.

Their approach to committed relationships varies from restlessness to outright panic. What the Moon-Uranus person fears is being trapped and hurt. Someone with a Moon-Uranus square may be continually attracted to unreliable types. The energy of the square causes open tension which drives them forward to do something now. They can throw themselves into destructive relationships which they know, on some level, will not last. Or they may abruptly end a relationship if their partner (usually without knowing) restricts their freedom in some way. Someone with a Moon-Uranus opposition may dither for years over committing to anyone. The opposition causes a hard-to-define underlying tension. With a conjunction there may be less tension, but the energy of Uranus will still be prominent. They will stubbornly insist that the relationship operate according to their idea of commitment, which will not be typical. It may range from having an open relationship to simply needing more alone time than most people.

Moon-Uranus is not an emotionally stable combination. By itself, the energy of the Moon is constantly changing (reflecting its phases in the sky). Uranus has an erratic energy that can flare up and die quickly. Moon-Uranus people are drawn to whatever is new (Uranus is responsible for love or lust at first sight). But new fades quickly, and as a relationship settles into routine, the Moon-Uranus person finds their interest waning and finally disappearing. Sensations feel dulled, as if they were wrapped in a thin sheet of plastic.

Being involved with a Moon-Uranus person can be bewildering. The relationship starts with a glorious rush. The partner is flattered and overwhelmed by the attentions of this fascinating outsider. Over time, the partner notices how the Moon-Uranus person flatly refuses to do certain things (like making plans more then a few days in advance). The partner wonders how someone so apparently free-spirited can be so rigid at the same time. During conversations, the Moon-Uranus person will suddenly switch off: they’ll continue to talk, but emotionally they’ve left the room. Attempts to build intimacy cause them to distance themselves further.

Many Moon-Uranus types may be perfectly aware of the roots of their behaviour. Uranian detachment brings insight, so they are able to stand back and observe themselves. They may even offer helpful explanations to their partners. While this sounds healthy, it’s actually another way for the Moon-Uranus person to escape. For example, a Moon-Uranus person discovers that their partner is cheating. They will feel hurt, but the instant the hurt becomes apparent, they jump back to a safe distance. Whatever feelings they had for their partner have been replaced with numbness. Their reaction, depending on the rest of their chart, may range from, “No worries, it happens,” to, “Right. I’m leaving now”. Either way, it’s unlikely that they will be intimate with their partner again. The partner, expecting a display of hurt and/or anger, is confused. The Moon-Uranus person may calmly explain that they feel numb, and this reminds them of the time when they were six and their Dad walked out. Rather than feeling what’s happening, they describe the absence of feeling.

But before we write off Moon-Uranus folk as being condemned to a life of watching from the sidelines, remember that everything in astrology has two sides. The insight these people have into their emotions is a powerful tool. They’ve already covered the territory that others spend years in therapy trying to work through. They are not possessive, and they give their partners just as much freedom as they ask for themselves. They don’t hold grudges: these are the people who remain friends with their exes. And let’s not forget the power of Uranus as the great awakener. If you’re involved with a Moon-Uranus person, you’re involved with an innovator and rule-breaker. Get ready to toss any stale ideas about relationships out the window.

The key for the Moon-Uranus person is compromise and patience. With compromise, they will find that the freedom they have been guarding so closely is actually more available to them. If they suggest rather than insist, they will find that their partner is usually open to giving them the space they need. With the right partner, they will also find that the switching off of emotions is not a permanent condition. If they wait out the numbness, it often fades and the feelings they had for their partner are still there.

Inside all Moon-Uranus people is a conflict between the need to belong and the desire to break free. Not belonging makes them uneasy, but being part of something makes them uncomfortable. Are they capable of having a long-term, committed relationship? Yes – if they want one. It is entirely possible for them to be part of a relationship where they can be free to feel safe.

---

I have moon in gemini square uranus in virgo. my venus-mars-sun in cancer. i dont relate with the description. emotionally detached is something i cannot relate at all.

there are things i can relate thoug.
* i need to change a lot. need the thrill of newness and just to provide some evidence: i have moved in the last 10 years to 7 different countries. have studied 5 different degrees, have changed careers so many times and so on...
* I tend to choose partners who are VERY INDEPENDENT. i wouldnt say unrealiable, but tend to be need lots of space. Initially i fought that tendency and tried to find men more needy to match my cancerian clingy style until i met a guy whose venus-moon-mars conjunct my cancer venus and found him so non emotinally independent that i realized that i did nto need that.

so i need the space and that is why i choose these partner. once you learn to work with the energy is great. it is just taking advantage of being with someone who will never invade your space.

*-i also connect with the thing of not consulting with your partner. my ex husband tend to point out that i made plans as i were single and my most recent partner also pointed that out.

posted October 14, 2011 12:43 PM            

------------------
Do You Think This Psychic Is Cute?

posted October 14, 2011 12:45 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by tuxedoMask:
i think that for anyone dealing with someone who has a placement like that, should be aware that thye're not to expect any sort of equality in the relationship.. to the native, all partners are pretty much toys to be dismissed once they've fulfilled their purpose and nothing else.

if they do decide to keep em around, all of the uneasiness they have with their own emotional needs and requirements will be projected onto the other person and then they'd be reprimanded for being 'human'..

all human things are things they don't acknowledge or accept within themselves and thus, they will never accept them in another human being.

they don't fall in love with people
they fall in love with ideas
with entities
so if anything,
that's the best u could be.

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totally disagree!

posted October 15, 2011 01:26 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by enchantress299:
is not entirely true... For me personally (I can't speak for anyone else), I think that there is a sense that my emotions could hurt others, so I'd rather withdraw and walk away instead of risk hurting the other person. In some ways, this has always seemed to me like it would only hurt ME and NOT the other person, but the way you speak, I can definitely tell that is not true.

Honestly, I've been recently realizing this same lesson too through my heavy pluto/Scorpio friend and the way he has been reacting. Both my Pisces friend and my Scorpio friend have been, in essence, reconnecting me to my emotions in the way that I communicate (because I am often not aware of it). My Pisces friend decided to start pointing out when I was being dismissive. When I complained to him that he and the Scorpio had been ganging up on me, he simply looked at me and said: "But that's because we know that you can do better. You can do better."

I think, for me personally, I don't need the detachment part of the aspect so much as the independence part of the aspect. I can actually feel very claustrophobic with someone who comes on too strong or too needy. This causes me to automatically back off. I think I have to temper this reaction in myself and try to explain to the other person that I simply need a bit of independence to keep a full sense of myself, instead of feeling fully lost in the other.

---

all of these things were some of the things i talked about with the person when i looked up their chart.. what i found most intriguing when looking into their eyes and talking to them, was that they were really sensitive *they have moon conjunct chiron..

i definitely picked up on that.

but the uranus side of it didn't help..

in hiding whatever that moon stands for, they only hid it sooooo far from their mind that it pops up through someone else and it freaks them out when they realize those things exist because they've been the same things they've worked so hard to hide away.

what i think allowed me to get to it all the easier was that the chiron was there..

had it been just a person with uranus making that aspect to their moon, i would've caught it but not to that extent..

i haven't contacted the person.

once they told me they felt 'smothered', i just dropped the phone onto the bed and made it a point to not say anything else.

they pretty much run a place that's quite the hot spot for a lot of people and i'm even making it a point to never set foot in there again.... i don't feel comfortable with it.

and the last thing i'd wanna experience, would be their going around to employees there trying to find a way to get me out if i ever did.

all bets are off.
i don't trust em.

--
it only goes about making the person's encounters that much more significant
and the pull back just as strong.

posted October 15, 2011 07:39 PM            

As I've got older, I'm learning to simply avoid the less emotionally robust. I don't mind people being sensitive or thin skinned but when it comes to my emotions I need a warrior of a man and I make no apology for this any more.

People are different, not everyone is suitable for some one else.....there's nothing wrong in this it just DIFFERENCES -which is what astrology can teach us.

I have a good amount of respect for others' boundaries and we all have them (boundaries) or at least should do if we want to be psychologically healthy.

I managed 5 years with my ex who had a moon/sat con in cancer but in the end he couldn't cope with my need to be emotionally separate and I couldn't cope with his demands for emotional attention. I'm perfectly willing to merge and blend but the time has to be right... and preferably unplanned.

posted June 07, 2013 10:03 AM            

This man I like a lot (we are not lovers, just acquaintances/friends, but there is strong mutual attracion) has Aqua moon exactly opposed to Uranus in natal. We are just friends, but it is a grey zone (he kind of confessed me his feelings last year, I confessed mine some months ago, we are just friends for the moment, but we see very seldom, only due to external circumstances - we are not in personal contact).

We have had some good talks and all I want is to get a bit closer to him, to talk... his behaviour is very weird and can be assumed as follows: longing for closeness, but actively ignoring, pushing others away. This pushing instinct seems to be uncontrollable (he told me once that his mom left them when he was small). His behaviour screams: Im so lonely, I need you... and when you get closer, he pushes you away, walks away, his back telling "what do you want from me, I dont need you?!".

I give him space and dont contact him, but things get trickier when we see each other, because I unconsciously start pushing to get closer (I have scorpio planets).

Is the key to let them come to you? and being kind to them, without pushing? I think that giving them their own medicine (being cold, avoidant and aloof) would hurt them... I know for sure that he wants to interact with me closer as well, on a friendly level at least (has hinted it many times, subtly).

posted June 07, 2013 10:56 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by jjj:
How do you deal with these persons?

This man I like a lot (we are not lovers, just acquaintances/friends, but there is strong mutual attracion) has Aqua moon exactly opposed to Uranus in natal. We are just friends, but it is a grey zone (he kind of confessed me his feelings last year, I confessed mine some months ago, we are just friends for the moment, but we see very seldom, only due to external circumstances - we are not in personal contact).

We have had some good talks and all I want is to get a bit closer to him, to talk... his behaviour is very weird and can be assumed as follows: longing for closeness, but actively ignoring, pushing others away. This pushing instinct seems to be uncontrollable (he told me once that his mom left them when he was small). His behaviour screams: Im so lonely, I need you... and when you get closer, he pushes you away, walks away, his back telling "what do you want from me, I dont need you?!".

I give him space and dont contact him, but things get trickier when we see each other, because I unconsciously start pushing to get closer (I have scorpio planets).

Is the key to let them come to you? and being kind to them, without pushing? I think that giving them their own medicine (being cold, avoidant and aloof) would hurt them... I know for sure that he wants to interact with me closer as well, on a friendly level at least (has hinted it many times, subtly).

---

I have moon square Uranus and you really cannot 'help' us in any way or do anything to push us into action either. and being kind and/or mean/treating us how you assume to be treated really won't have any affect except to make you look bizarre to us and question why we're with you :-) the state we are in (trying to understand why we want intimacy and yet don't) won't go away. even when you are fully aware of what you are doing (pushing someone away) you cannot stop, it's an automatic reaction.

and then we end up lonely, but not really. we're alone, but we can handle the loneliness, if that makes sense. because we're used to operating under the condition we're in, it becomes tolerable. so any "His behaviour screams: Im so lonely, I need you... and when you get closer, he pushes you away, walks away, his back telling "what do you want from me, I dont need you?!"" - that is what you want to see, it's probably very far from being true. the thing is, we are ok being alone, and that is what creates this problem. we want to be alone and yet together. it's a push-pull energy that will continue, and unless your planets are similarly inclined towards that energy and you have a lot of Uranus in your chart it'll be hard for you. I found myself an aqua/Uranus-heavy person so they understand my dynamic and are similar.

posted June 07, 2013 11:07 AM            

thanks for your reply. My heart sank a bit reading this. Ive had some most wonderful moments of emotional closeness with this man, so he is capable of being emotionally intimate. He also mentioned that he is struggling with this aspect of his personality, so at least he is aware.

I love him in my heart and I would like to be closer to him, including physical intimacy.

His behaviour hurt me first very much, but I figured this push-pull out even before he told me his birth date and I saw this aspect. I do believe that Uranus/Moon has problems with trust. Our relationship was much better before I told him my feelings because he seemed to trust me. Now I have lost part of the trust and he is avoiding me. His avoidance produces strong reaction in me, so I guess my lesson is to stop being hurt by his avoidance and aloofness.

But a Moon Uranus person does need emotional intimacy/cuddling/sex?

I have Uranus in vth squaring closely my AC and I have Aqua NN, looks like he is pushing me towards my NN. Thanks again.

posted June 07, 2013 11:09 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by starmoon:
I have moon opp. Uranus and you really cannot 'help' us in any way or do anything to push us into action either. and being kind and/or mean/treating us how you assume to be treated really won't have any affect except to make you look bizarre to us and question why we're with you :-) the state we are in (trying to understand why we want intimacy and yet don't) won't go away. even when you are fully aware of what you are doing (pushing someone away) you cannot stop, it's an automatic reaction.

and then we end up lonely, but not really. we're alone, but we can handle the loneliness, if that makes sense. because we're used to operating under the condition we're in, it becomes tolerable. so any "His behaviour screams: Im so lonely, I need you... and when you get closer, he pushes you away, walks away, his back telling "what do you want from me, I dont need you?!"" - that is what you want to see, it's probably very far from being true. the thing is, we are ok being alone, and that is what creates this problem. we want to be alone and yet together. it's a push-pull energy that will continue, and unless your planets are similarly inclined towards that energy and you have a lot of Uranus in your chart it'll be hard for you. I found myself an aqua/Uranus-heavy person so they understand my dynamic and are similar.

ultimately a man is a man and a woman is a woman, right? so if someone is interested in you romantically you have a shot, but you'll never get beyond that barrier we have. it's just there, and i'd guess many of us have very unique marriage situations if we ever marry

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I do agree on some points (push/pull) though i cant say i always seek to be alone.

Maybe its the fact i have 2 Tsquares (uranus and neptune opposite moon and square sun) and the neptunian energy might have effected that (and the scopio planets)

I have a need to be close with others but the distance allows m to keep a degree of controll but at times (dates with people i wasnt really attracted to) i felt suffocated and so distanced myself and that got me thinking.

posted June 07, 2013 01:29 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by jjj:
Starmoon,

thanks for your reply. My heart sank a bit reading this. Ive had some most wonderful moments of emotional closeness with this man, so he is capable of being emotionally intimate. He also mentioned that he is struggling with this aspect of his personality, so at least he is aware.

I love him in my heart and I would like to be closer to him, including physical intimacy.

His behaviour hurt me first very much, but I figured this push-pull out even before he told me his birth date and I saw this aspect. I do believe that Uranus/Moon has problems with trust. Our relationship was much better before I told him my feelings because he seemed to trust me. Now I have lost part of the trust and he is avoiding me. His avoidance produces strong reaction in me, so I guess my lesson is to stop being hurt by his avoidance and aloofness.

But a Moon Uranus person does need emotional intimacy/cuddling/sex?

I have Uranus in vth squaring closely my AC and I have Aqua NN, looks like he is pushing me towards my NN. Thanks again.

IF SUCH A PERSON IS IN LOVE, do they express their feelings? HOW?

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posted June 08, 2013 10:01 AM            

I am constantly attracted to men with Aqua moon and/or Moon/Uranus, so I think they somehow mirror my own issues. I have a tight Venus Saturn opposition in natal and I think the downsides of this placement are quite similar to Moon/Uranus (wanting to be alone, pushing others away, feeling rejected...). As someone who has struggled with these issues I dont completely agree with this:

quote:

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Originally posted by starmoon:
and then we end up lonely, but not really. we're alone, but we can handle the loneliness, if that makes sense. because we're used to operating under the condition we're in, it becomes tolerable. so any "His behaviour screams: Im so lonely, I need you... and when you get closer, he pushes you away, walks away, his back telling "what do you want from me, I dont need you?!"" - that is what you want to see, it's probably very far from being true. the thing is, we are ok being alone.

---

Im also a loner and most of time ok with it, because I have no choice... but then I realize that I have a choice and this way of being is not natural. So I face the issue and make an effort... and things have been getting better, slowly.

posted April 21, 2015 09:26 PM            

I crave a deep, soulful union (Venus Scorp), but if I take you to deep waters and you're not emotionally there with me, no matter how many chances I give you, I will become emotionally detached. We can play house, etc., but in the end facades don't matter and rarely last.

Which sucks! Most of my partners have been air signs and they either flee, or stick around playing house if they have some earth placements.

posted April 21, 2015 11:00 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by BeholdAstarte:
hmm at times i do feel really detached and not very affectionate or "cool" in my emotions, but at the same time i think that im pretty sensitive or maybe even too hypersensitive towards people at times im just very reserved in expressing my feelings.

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