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Topic: Age Differences
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andstuff Knowflake Posts: 2754 From: Registered: Jun 2012
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posted September 08, 2012 12:04 PM
quote: Originally posted by doommlord: lets see if you will feel that way when you will meet him 
i hope i won't meet him light brown hair and glasses is not my idea. also i dislike the phrsae "you will not know what draws you to him. he'll be good-looking and nice to talk to" (well to be sure something else will be wrong. such as age or build or both). i hoped i was good enough for a syd barrett circa 68 lookalike at least. and there you go. anyway cheers for chatting with me IP: Logged |
doommlord Moderator Posts: 2601 From: israel Registered: Dec 2011
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posted September 08, 2012 12:43 PM
i think that your fixation on physical aspects is what will keep you from forming a strong bond with anotherif he doesent wear glasses is he a better person? what if he might need some when he will grow old? than what? will you leave him? and if his hair color will turn gray? will he be less worthy of love? and what if his body type is not perfect...is he less of a person? the less you put on the physical aspects and more on the emotional the better the relationship itself will be...imo and you not wanting to compromise.....relationship are built on compromise...both sides have to becuse no one is a perfect match for another....and if you are unwilling should your love do all the compromising....as you are not "perfect" no one is take some time to think about what i said....before you will think im making an attack on you IP: Logged |
andstuff Knowflake Posts: 2754 From: Registered: Jun 2012
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posted September 08, 2012 12:54 PM
quote: Originally posted by doommlord: i think that your fixation on physical aspects is what will keep you from forming a strong bond with anotherif he doesent wear glasses is he a better person? what if he might need some when he will grow old? than what? will you leave him? and if his hair color will turn gray? will he be less worthy of love? the less you put on the physical aspects and more on the emotional the better the relationship itself will be...imo and you not wanting to compromise.....relationship are built on compromise...both sides have to becuse no one is a perfect match for another....and if you are unwilling should your love do all the compromising....as you are not "perfect" no one is take some time to think about what i said....before you will think im making an attack on you
i can't see why you would think i can see an attack in your words. is it there?  well the trouble is i have the kind of looks that turn every single head in the street. and i sort of know it attracts whoever asks me out. which is pretty discouraging. so whoever ends up getting me will be getting aesthetic/erotic pleasure. if i am so much worse than others that i do not deserve any myself, it would make sense but somehow i have received no evidence thereof i am not by any means stating the physical aspect is more important than emotions, btw. but well it is a great pleasure to feel aesthetically nurtured desire for a lover, probably the greatest i have known. of course it would be shallow and unfulfilling without emotions. i know it for a fact i have the capacity to satisfy both the erotic and emotional needs of whoever it might be, i kind of assumed i am allowed to have my erotic needs and my emotional needs and my aesthetic needs. i know men think girls don't have any, but well i want to have them and will kill with my bare hands for any attempts to take mine away from me the aesthetic aspect adds more spirituality for sure. plato said this, not me. IP: Logged |
doommlord Moderator Posts: 2601 From: israel Registered: Dec 2011
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posted September 08, 2012 01:00 PM
if this is what you belive than may your beauty draw the right people to you  as in the end happiness is what matters....hopefully you wont need to kill anyone with your bare hands  i think we turned this thread all off-topic XD btw i wasnt attacking but i have had conversations with people who took every word i said as a personal offence....and im a libra! IP: Logged |
violet7887 Knowflake Posts: 1662 From: Registered: Jul 2011
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posted September 08, 2012 04:16 PM
quote: Originally posted by YoursTrulyAlways: Hi Violet,I'm so sorry that I missed your post till now. It's true that I am contsantly deeply insecure about myself in terms of achievement and money, even though I have a long enough list of both. This is not about emotional insecurity. It's more about reputational risk. Mine's an industry where you are only as good as your last deal, and your ability to do business hinges on your reputation. Hypothetically speaking, because I am very married. Let's say I have been single all my life and have never been married. I'm close to 50 and I do routinely consort with (not date!) women in their early 20s (which I don't understand why I seem to get along very well with), I'm not about to bump into a fellow professional walking down the street with a woman 30 years younger. The next thing I know, information spreads like wildfire. The dirty-minded guys may come up and high-five me (and there are a lot of butt heads in my business), but there goes my career. I will no longer get hooked up with deals. I can't get partnerships. I become known across the Street as unreliable and having a questionable lifestyle. Never mind my reputation with women my age or older. The simple explanation is that I am only human. A pretty young woman walks down the street, and it may or may not turn my head. But it ends there, even if I were not married. Absolutely no offense to anyone, but outside of my wife, I would not sacrifice my career for any woman or any amount of sex. I've worked hard all my life to get where I am, and I'm not about to lose it like that. And all that nonsense about older men not being able to perform sexually is just that... nonsense. I'm as virile as I was at 21, if not a lot more so. We exercise our skills everyday.
ah thanks for sharing YTA, so basically, it is about an individual's priorities. IP: Logged |
PhoenixFire Knowflake Posts: 1397 From: The Crossing Registered: Jun 2009
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posted September 08, 2012 04:47 PM
Very interesting thread, and thought provoking discussion over all  Girlinseattle, good point re lack of Uranus aspects possibly being related to stay within relationships w a lot of similarities. I wonder how it would be to have minimal Uranus energy. I have Uranus at home in the 11th conj Venus, so quirkiness and eccentric feel good now the age diff w my love and I isn't vast at all, but it is one more area of uniqueness. We also are from diff cultures and upbringings, which is cool. There is comfOrt and ease w pairs who fair from similar backgrounds, and one should hopefully have agreement in major life areas, but it is also exciting to have something different/new. Or perhaps I think so as I'm a Sagittarius, always looking to expand my world view. Thank you for your post, yta Enjoyed reading about your dedication to your career, you sound like an honorable person. Very refreshing to see a male who doesn't place casual sexual adventures over integrity  IP: Logged |
Aquacheeka Knowflake Posts: 2902 From: Toronto Registered: Mar 2012
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posted September 08, 2012 04:52 PM
quote: Originally posted by PhoenixFire: Very interesting thread, and thought provoking discussion over all  Girlinseattle, good point re lack of Uranus aspects possibly being related to stay within relationships w a lot of similarities. I wonder how it would be to have minimal Uranus energy. I have Uranus at home in the 11th conj Venus, so quirkiness and eccentric feel good now the age diff w my love and I isn't vast at all, but it is one more area of uniqueness. We also are from diff cultures and upbringings, which is cool. There is comfOrt and ease w pairs who fair from similar backgrounds, and one should hopefully have agreement in major life areas, but it is also exciting to have something different/new. Or perhaps I think so as I'm a Sagittarius, always looking to expand my world view. Thank you for your post, yta Enjoyed reading about your dedication to your career, you sound like an honorable person. Very refreshing to see a male who doesn't place casual sexual adventures over integrity 
I'm very Uranian and I'm drawn to unconventional relationships as such, but this is just an area of difference that just doesn't appeal to me. I think it's because having an intellectual connection is so important to me and I can't imagine having much in common or much to talk about with a much older man. I mean, there won't be many shared life experiences... you grew up in different eras.
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CosmicKarma360 Knowflake Posts: 774 From: here and there Registered: Sep 2010
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posted September 08, 2012 06:01 PM
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CosmicKarma360 Knowflake Posts: 774 From: here and there Registered: Sep 2010
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posted September 08, 2012 06:06 PM
quote: Originally posted by Aquacheeka: I'm very Uranian and I'm drawn to unconventional relationships as such, but this is just an area of difference that just doesn't appeal to me. I think it's because having an intellectual connection is so important to me and I can't imagine having much in common or much to talk about with a much older man. I mean, there won't be many shared life experiences... you grew up in different eras.
Ok, now I'm really going to step in it again Anyway, just wanted to say I agree wholeheartedly with you. In fact, when I dated someone much older, that's exactly the problem I ran into. It wasn't all bad, but in the end, being with guys who were at the same place and on the same level I was on simply worked out best. At least for me. IP: Logged |
GirlinSeattle Knowflake Posts: 87 From: WA, USA Registered: Oct 2011
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posted September 08, 2012 07:06 PM
quote: Originally posted by Aquacheeka: I'm very Uranian and I'm drawn to unconventional relationships as such, but this is just an area of difference that just doesn't appeal to me. I think it's because having an intellectual connection is so important to me and I can't imagine having much in common or much to talk about with a much older man. I mean, there won't be many shared life experiences... you grew up in different eras.
Yep, age gaps aren't the only unconventional aspect a relationship can have. It takes two for a relationship, anyway, if you find that the other person really has nothing in common, no relationship can work whether or not there's an age difference. IP: Logged |
PhoenixFire Knowflake Posts: 1397 From: The Crossing Registered: Jun 2009
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posted September 08, 2012 07:38 PM
Very true to all the above. I'm not sure my relationship would have lasted this long, if the age gap was significant ( more/less than 5 yrs). I find older men very attractive, but also a bit restrictive of my sag energy due to generational differences. It seems that there is a world of difference, as the world has changed so rapidly w the age of Internet/communications. Ive noticed a lot of my older friends/relatives have challenges w understanding my fascination w this forum, Facebook, twitter, instram etc some of them utilize these media forms, but many are turned off by current generation of youth & Young adults love of texting. My parents refuse to text me and get annoyed by the fact that I don't like talking on the phone, prefer texts/ instant messages. It also seems this generation is a bit more open to challenging authority and being independent, while past gens are usually more respectful of authority and are wary of all the techie & specialization in society and the labor force. So yes I concede w a generation difference, it'd probably take more concession and mutual understanding of life stages to make it work. IP: Logged |
andstuff Knowflake Posts: 2754 From: Registered: Jun 2012
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posted September 08, 2012 08:22 PM
quote: Originally posted by PhoenixFire: Very true to all the above. I'm not sure my relationship would have lasted this long, if the age gap was significant ( more/less than 5 yrs). I find older men very attractive, but also a bit restrictive of my sag energy due to generational differences. It seems that there is a world of difference, as the world has changed so rapidly w the age of Internet/communications. Ive noticed a lot of my older friends/relatives have challenges w understanding my fascination w this forum, Facebook, twitter, instram etc some of them utilize these media forms, but many are turned off by current generation of youth & Young adults love of texting. My parents refuse to text me and get annoyed by the fact that I don't like talking on the phone, prefer texts/ instant messages. It also seems this generation is a bit more open to challenging authority and being independent, while past gens are usually more respectful of authority and are wary of all the techie & specialization in society and the labor force. So yes I concede w a generation difference, it'd probably take more concession and mutual understanding of life stages to make it work.
no way, so true.... also something kind of makes one closer to those who also grew up to the shoe people, darkwing duck, ninja turtles, whatever, it kind of has the same sentimental value. IP: Logged |
CosmicKarma360 Knowflake Posts: 774 From: here and there Registered: Sep 2010
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posted September 08, 2012 08:33 PM
quote: Originally posted by PhoenixFire: Very true to all the above. I'm not sure my relationship would have lasted this long, if the age gap was significant ( more/less than 5 yrs). I find older men very attractive, but also a bit restrictive of my sag energy due to generational differences. It seems that there is a world of difference, as the world has changed so rapidly w the age of Internet/communications. Ive noticed a lot of my older friends/relatives have challenges w understanding my fascination w this forum, Facebook, twitter, instram etc some of them utilize these media forms, but many are turned off by current generation of youth & Young adults love of texting. My parents refuse to text me and get annoyed by the fact that I don't like talking on the phone, prefer texts/ instant messages. It also seems this generation is a bit more open to challenging authority and being independent, while past gens are usually more respectful of authority and are wary of all the techie & specialization in society and the labor force. So yes I concede w a generation difference, it'd probably take more concession and mutual understanding of life stages to make it work.
What you say is so very true. The Internet and technology has really separated one generation from the other. I saw that working as a computer tech at a school. There were 2nd graders with cell phones. I didn't have a cell phone until I was 35! The experience those kids are having in their childhood compared with mine is totally different. I know a young woman who dated a much older man. They've broken up now. She has all sorts of online projects. A blog, facebook, twitter, etc... He barely does email and shops on Amazon. Drove him nuts when she would tweet. He just couldn't get it how she would share her life online. I think that's one reason why he dumped her. IP: Logged |
PhoenixFire Knowflake Posts: 1397 From: The Crossing Registered: Jun 2009
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posted September 08, 2012 09:10 PM
And stuff, very true there is a sentimental value & bond w someone who relates to your childhood love ninja turtles by the way The other day at work, my coworkers were discussing the tv shows cheers & mash. I didn't have much to add, other than fondness for the cheers theme song ( my parents loved that show). My favorite tv shows were fresh prince (got to love will smith) and full house  Cosmic, totally relate to the new media age kids. I became a mom at young age, so there isn't that big of an age gap btwn my eldest child and I. I'm a fun mom because of this, but a lot of her fast tech stuff just goes over my head . I remember enjoying entertaining myself outdoors, and using my imagination much more than my children do. While I love media & communications, my connection to it isn't as deep compared to the kids. Kids now are so tech, most would feel lost w/ o the Internet. Totally relate to the wariness some older generations have re exposing one's life online. Most of my older relatives/ friends feel the same way... They dislike & mistrust fb and twitter... At the same time, some of my older relatives enjoy finding out the gossip online by cyber stalking the younger folks fb and twitter. I've had situations in which older relatives created fb pages, and never post updates or add pictures... Sole purpose being to log on & read all of the other people's posts to be nosy. Lol I've actually had to place some of these relatives onto restrictive reader status. Lol sorry got off on a tangent... Just something I've been thinking about. Gen differences and diff attitudes towards online openness IP: Logged |
sand Knowflake Posts: 10270 From: Registered: May 2011
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posted September 08, 2012 10:05 PM
old man/ lady cologne ewww! #taurus sun/venusIP: Logged |
CosmicKarma360 Knowflake Posts: 774 From: here and there Registered: Sep 2010
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posted September 08, 2012 10:51 PM
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PhoenixFire Knowflake Posts: 1397 From: The Crossing Registered: Jun 2009
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posted September 09, 2012 02:36 PM
@ Sand, lol berry true dislike overpowering stinky perfume & cologne.Cosmic, totally agree.... It is very interesting to see the large break between generations... It is happening so fast too. It will be interesting to see what social changes today's kids will bring for tomorrow. Pluto in Libra experienced the changes of relationship status, we are the kids of divorce and breaking down of what the family unit was and what it is now. The family & love partnerships are being redefined as we speak. Pluto in Scorpio are the kids in touch w transformation and sexual power... Even more free I believe than the kids of the free love times, as those kids were rebelling against the conservatism 50s, while with these kids sexual expression is more of a norm. I'm fascinated to wonder what changes our Pluto in sag and Pluto in Capricorn kids will experience and what changes they will bring to society. I'm guessing Pluto in sag will bring with them a new ideology of rebellion and casting away the old, which would have started w Pluto in Scorpio. I see them as idealistic and hopeful but perhaps missing the details and structure pluto in Capricorn will bring. Lol perhaps the trend of skinny jeans sagged below the waist will long be over by then. I think it's refreshing to see boys being able to dress in pink shirts, and other colors once viewed as female only, w/o being bullied. But gosh I so dislike the skinny jean look lol. . Lol I got carried away w my musings again and way off topic. To conclude the world is changing so darn fast that to love someone from a diff generation might very well be like loving someone from a diff universe 
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