|
Author
|
Topic: People who don't want to get married
|
I'm so cappy
Knowflake Posts: 2632
From: Saturn (summer house on Chiron)
Registered: Nov 2012
|
posted October 15, 2013 04:04 PM
  
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zNaNgcotVLw ------------------
I'm sooo happy! I mean, cappy. IP: Logged |
Kerosene
Knowflake Posts: 6377
From: Mercury
Registered: Dec 2012
|
posted October 15, 2013 04:17 PM
Lmfao 1940's single girl anthem!IP: Logged |
I'm so cappy
Knowflake Posts: 2632
From: Saturn (summer house on Chiron)
Registered: Nov 2012
|
posted October 15, 2013 05:49 PM
I found it by accident  So, what do you suggest?------------------
I'm sooo happy! I mean, cappy. IP: Logged |
PixieJane
Moderator Posts: 3093
From: CA
Registered: Oct 2010
|
posted October 15, 2013 06:51 PM
The reasons for not wanting to are as varied for the reasons as wanting to. But let's see, off hand...My dad never married again refusing to make himself vulnerable like that ever again. I believe it was his Sag Sun (but I don't have his chart, we've barely been on speaking terms since I was 14 and never were that close). I knew an Aquarius with a lot of Cancer & Libra who won't get married as his passion was science and felt that it would not be fair to wife & family to make them a secondary obligation (and I suspect he didn't want to be distracted). He did say he'd consider it IF she was as obsessed as he was, but that if both were equally obsessed then there wouldn't be a point as they'd do the same thing anyway (and if not and ended up with family obligations then that would distract them both). I knew a Scorpio woman who would never give up her privacy or autonomy to another and therefore rejected the idea of marriage out of hand. The ONLY reason I favor the idea of marriage for myself is to be considered family so that I couldn't be barred from medical and legal information & visitation among other things. But I suspect if I didn't have Venus in Libra (with Sun and other placements) that I wouldn't care for the idea at all. That is, my Sag would keep me free (just as it seems to do my dad). Finally, there's Emma Goldman who wrote this condemning marriage back in 1911 (so it's a bit dated):
http://dwardmac.pitzer.edu/Anarchist_Archives/goldman/aando/marriageandlove.html Here's her chart explained:
http://www.astrotheme.com/astrology/Emma_Goldman IP: Logged |
Kerosene
Knowflake Posts: 6377
From: Mercury
Registered: Dec 2012
|
posted October 15, 2013 07:30 PM
My sister was telling me that my s.o and I should get married and adopt babies and I seriously started having a panic attack..I felt like crying and hiding under my blanket.. I hate society for encouraging marriage....
I just want to be free with no responsibilities
but I know deep down my partner wants a family and stability in the form of a marriage.. I feel everyone in my life makes marriage out to be the number one concern in my life..
**** that.. IP: Logged |
Zander916
Knowflake Posts: 1059
From: Midwest
Registered: Aug 2013
|
posted October 15, 2013 07:38 PM
I think I saw once that Uranus aspect to venus may do it...? IP: Logged |
fireopal09
Knowflake Posts: 122
From: Dallas,TX, Us
Registered: Oct 2010
|
posted October 15, 2013 07:49 PM
I love this! Here comes the novel. I come from a long line of forward thinking, divorced women. My grandmother (Aqua Sun) divorced my grandfather in the mid fifties. My mom divorced my dad when I was 8 months old in 1974 (Cappy Sun, Aqua Mars). Sun/Uranus conjunction in Libra is me. I said, from a very young age, I would NEVER get married and I ended up being a collector of proposals and a couple of engagement rings. I went through a really abusive relationship and got Jesus (was agnostic/atheist most of my life). Got engaged to one dork that jerked me over. After barely catching my breath for a 1 1/2 years , I got engaged to another dork and ended up marrying him due to the fact I got preggo 2 months after said engagement and got married less than a month before Kiddo was born. I was certainly digging in my heels, but grudgingly gave in (he was a supreme jerk during my pregnancy). Got divorced in 2010 and even signed ALL divorce papers with a smiley face next to my name. I am back to being my agnostic/ atheistic self and am comfy/happy about it.------------------
Claire
"When going gets weird, the weird turn pro."
-HST IP: Logged |
LiesLilithsaidtouranus
Knowflake Posts: 860
From: La,la land
Registered: Sep 2011
|
posted October 15, 2013 08:13 PM
I want to get married but in the same time, I don't.
What I want is a full committed partnerships where both parties doesn't feel pressure into signing tons of paper work to prove to an unbalanced world that we are together.
I could see why marriage down the line is very important. It is needed incase of anything happening to me or him/her. That's the only need I see, there must be a health proxy.
I don't know about kids that much. I know I don't want to adopt unless they are my sisters' kids invade anything happens to them. Any child not related to me by blood will not win all of my heart. Sounds bad, but that's how my motherly instincts work.
Anyways, if marraige wasn't necessary I would totally go for a long time partner.
I think this has to do with my Venus in Pisces square moon in Gemini. The two forms of love just don't mesh well. I hate the idea of being in a cage and the fact that divorce is an option makes me want to jump off a bridge.IP: Logged |
BellaFenice
Newflake Posts: 22
From: Phoenix, AZ, USA
Registered: Sep 2013
|
posted October 15, 2013 08:31 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Kerosene:
My sister was telling me that my s.o and I should get married and adopt babies and I seriously started having a panic attack..I felt like crying and hiding under my blanket.. I hate society for encouraging marriage....
I just want to be free with no responsibilities
but I know deep down my partner wants a family and stability in the form of a marriage.. I feel everyone in my life makes marriage out to be the number one concern in my life..
**** that..
Haha, that sounds pretty similar to me, only I am single so people really, really push the whole 'OMG you need to start thinking about marriage' thing. I'm turning 25 this Feb and the way people have been questioning my inability to care about finding 'the one' would make you think I'm approaching my 40's and desperate to have children. I could definitely see myself never getting married (1st house stellium and empty 7th house). But then again with my Cancer MC you never know. IP: Logged |
Kerosene
Knowflake Posts: 6377
From: Mercury
Registered: Dec 2012
|
posted October 15, 2013 08:40 PM
Damn we're too young to even consider settling down imoI have a first house stellium with an empty 7th house too!!! IP: Logged |
LiesLilithsaidtouranus
Knowflake Posts: 860
From: La,la land
Registered: Sep 2011
|
posted October 15, 2013 08:45 PM
You guys are sooo old lolIP: Logged |
Kerosene
Knowflake Posts: 6377
From: Mercury
Registered: Dec 2012
|
posted October 15, 2013 08:49 PM
Who wants to get married and have kids at 21 on purpose?
My biggest concern is finding designated driver.. not a baby sitter.
Way to throw away your youth!!
you know humans live past 40 now a days.Besides I'll probably start thinking about having a family when I'm 45.. Drinking my brandy- well i traveled the world and went to mars.
what else is there to do? Oh I know raise children!!! IP: Logged |
Violets
Knowflake Posts: 949
From:
Registered: Apr 2011
|
posted October 15, 2013 08:51 PM
I never wanted to get married (until I met my husband, which didn't happen until I was 33 years old). No offense to anyone, but I thought the idea was absurd and overrated. I have natal Uranus conjunct IC, trine Sun and Lilith in 8th, and sextile Moon in 2nd. I think that probably about wraps it up for me. IP: Logged |
LiesLilithsaidtouranus
Knowflake Posts: 860
From: La,la land
Registered: Sep 2011
|
posted October 15, 2013 08:57 PM
Lol I was just kidding.
But seriously, the age to be thinking about permanent partnerships should be 30. This is of course if someone doesn't show up.
I think when I am in my 20's if no one amazing is around I wouldn't worry too much. I want to be able to enjoy myself, but I would love a partnership early on so I won't hit a midlife crisis early on.IP: Logged |
Odette
Knowflake Posts: 2726
From:
Registered: May 2012
|
posted October 15, 2013 09:19 PM
I just don't care about marriage because I don't feel like it would complete or better my life in any way.
No one is pressuring me to get married either. I guess that's lucky lol Im very clear on what I want - what I'm passionate about - what my goals are.
I'm too passionate about too many other things to get married. That's my final conclusion lol It takes time and energy and work to make a marriage function and last.. and to have a happy family ... and at this age (I'm 27) I still don't feel like I'm willing to invest all this time and energy... when my heart and my passions in life lie elsewhere. My Sun and Venus in the 11th could be the reason why I feel this way or maybe Mars in the 7th.. IP: Logged |
hannaramaa
Knowflake Posts: 5854
From:
Registered: Nov 2011
|
posted October 15, 2013 10:03 PM
^ YES! I feel the same way! Especially since I'm a late bloomer, I just want to explore. I have Sun and Venus in the 11th too.IP: Logged |
Barbiegirl19
Knowflake Posts: 1584
From: Smalltown Pennsylvania
Registered: Jul 2013
|
posted October 15, 2013 10:09 PM
Didn't you already start a thread like this? Don't give up on love. He's out there somewhere he just hasn't found you yet. ❤️ IP: Logged |
Kerosene
Knowflake Posts: 6377
From: Mercury
Registered: Dec 2012
|
posted October 15, 2013 10:20 PM
What does that have to with marriage?
I don't equate love with marriage.
It's a business contract lol.
IP: Logged |
Barbiegirl19
Knowflake Posts: 1584
From: Smalltown Pennsylvania
Registered: Jul 2013
|
posted October 15, 2013 10:28 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Kerosene:
What does that have to with marriage?
I don't equate love with marriage.
It's a business contract lol.
IP: Logged |
Barbiegirl19
Knowflake Posts: 1584
From: Smalltown Pennsylvania
Registered: Jul 2013
|
posted October 15, 2013 10:28 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Kerosene:
What does that have to with marriage?
I don't equate love with marriage.
It's a business contract lol.
Love is apart of the triangle of marriage... IP: Logged |
Violets
Knowflake Posts: 949
From:
Registered: Apr 2011
|
posted October 15, 2013 10:50 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Kerosene:
What does that have to with marriage?
I don't equate love with marriage.
It's a business contract lol.
YES. That was exactly how I viewed marriage for most of my life. Then I actually met someone I genuinely *wanted* to marry. But it does take a lot of work, energy, and commitment. Especially if you have children. But I don't have any stake in whether or not people want to get married. I think my step-mom is still waiting for my youngest brother to get married, lol. He's 24 for f**k's sake.
 IP: Logged |
Cynnared
Knowflake Posts: 1050
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
|
posted October 15, 2013 10:55 PM
Middle aged and I refuse to walk down the aisle. Why do I need a piece of paper to show I'm committed in a long term relationship. I don't need one. If feel too trapped and fenced in. I have been common law a few times. I was engaged four times to the wrong men. I prefer to keep my last name and save my money for something better rather than flushing it down the toilet.What do I have in my chart? 11 th house Sun in Aries opposite Uranus in Libra square to 8th house mars in Cappy. I have don't fence me in Saggy on the 7th. IP: Logged |
Barbiegirl19
Knowflake Posts: 1584
From: Smalltown Pennsylvania
Registered: Jul 2013
|
posted October 15, 2013 11:08 PM
I don't believe it shows that you're more or less committed when you're married. It's just the next step that we've been doing for thousands of years. Marriage is very beautiful. It just sucks the way it's been stepped all over and not taken seriously. IP: Logged |
11nahyt
Knowflake Posts: 2459
From: Neptune. where the witches wear givenchy
Registered: Feb 2012
|
posted October 15, 2013 11:08 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Cynnared:
I refuse to walk down the aisle. Why do I need a piece of paper to show I'm committed in a long term relationship. I don't need one. I prefer to keep my last name and save my money for something better rather than flushing it down the toilet.
I agree with this 100% .. I have no planets in the 11th. but I have my libra stellium in the 7 house (sun/merc/mars).. I have Juno conjunct Osc. lilith in the 7th too lmao. IP: Logged |
PixieJane
Moderator Posts: 3093
From: CA
Registered: Oct 2010
|
posted October 15, 2013 11:32 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Violets:
YES. That was exactly how I viewed marriage for most of my life. Then I actually met someone I genuinely *wanted* to marry. But it does take a lot of work, energy, and commitment. Especially if you have children
Business contract means like shared retirement, benefits, and things like that. It also gives you a voice you would not otherwise have in medical and legal decisions as well as access to information (or even visitation and choice) that you would otherwise be denied. It prevents biological family from arbitrarily ruining or plundering a loved one after death of a partner (because you're just "roomies" in the eyes of the law without marriage, which is a legal contract, not a religious one or mere "declaration of love"). It also helps facilitate things like shared banking accounts and if there are children then it gives both the right to intervene and advocate for the child to full effect rather than just one. These days this shouldn't be a concern UNLESS you're in love. Otherwise, why sign such a contract that can (and probably will) bite you in the butt if the love isn't real and lasting? But in love and wanting to share a life together then such a business contract then makes sense.
There's the other kind that I think you're thinking of where families marry or even auction off their kids to form political and/or economic alliances (sometimes an arranged marriage) but that's rare in the western world these days, and unenforceable legally even when parents try. And there are the gold diggers and such as well but I expect it's rare that people (that is both members) normally enter those knowingly & willingly (save like when some rich old man willingly marries a 20-year-old for his last year or so of life).
IP: Logged |
Lindaland
UBBFriend: Email This Page to Someone! 
