posted December 16, 2018 11:57 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by hypatia238:
I think Uranus falling in the 8th would make you more detached around 8th house matters and perhaps more conservative around such matters since is ruled by Saturn, perhaps you see the world as oversexed and feel sex is over-rated..

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I think Saturn being in Aquarius in the ninth transforms it a bit? Like I feel my dark side is very unlike what people view me as initially. I'm mad kinky with weird stuff people are always surprised of lol (I exude a rather innocent aura at first and always wonder why, probably sun/moon in the twelfth). So yeah it must be Saturn in Aqua in the ninth.

posted December 17, 2018 12:06 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by ChildofVenus:
It's ok not everyone can deal with the push and pull and the disappearing. That's why people like us really need someone who gets us. Most people really just don't understand. Sometimes I try to explain how I feel to family members. They think it's odd or what I'm looking for doesn't exist. I've accepted that most people don't understand and it's fine. That's the thing about being different most people don't get it. But I'd rather be different than to be like others.

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posted December 17, 2018 12:10 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Brenda_S:
Was she cool about you asking her out after turning her down initially? And was there a 'reason' you gave her when turning her down? (Just trying to make sense of all this and compare it to my situation, but of course that probably is a bad idea. I just wonder if turning someone down is indicative of something deeper aka if that feeling of disinterest will always be there, which is why I'm wondering the dynamic between you two then since it did seem to work out in the end for ya...)

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well i told her i loved her too and gave her a hug and said i didn't want to **** anything up, and we were on a trip

we were actually on a beach sitting in a life guard chair when that happenedshe had gotten upset about something else because her mother is a **** and had run off

it was late, didnt want to leave her wandering out at night so i went to find her, found her there

ended up walking around the boardwalk with her for hours, went back to the hotel and i slept in her bed that night, she was sad but she handled it well enough

few weeks later she said she didnt think she could stay friends with me, so i went over to her house to talk to her

things were the same between us for a bit and then i asked her out it was around my birthday when she told me that so end of august and then i asked her out on halloween

i was real with her though, told her that i had panicked even though i wanted her because she meant a lot to me

apologized for being stupid etc and she was happy and it didnt matter

posted December 17, 2018 12:20 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Dumuzi:
well i told her i loved her too and gave her a hug and said i didn't want to **** anything up, and we were on a trip

we were actually on a beach sitting in a life guard chair when that happenedshe had gotten upset about something else because her mother is a **** and had run off

it was late, didnt want to leave her wandering out at night so i went to find her, found her there

ended up walking around the boardwalk with her for hours, went back to the hotel and i slept in her bed that night, she was sad but she handled it well enough

few weeks later she said she didnt think she could stay friends with me, so i went over to her house to talk to her

things were the same between us for a bit and then i asked her out it was around my birthday when she told me that so end of august and then i asked her out on halloween

i was real with her though, told her that i had panicked even though i wanted her because she meant a lot to me

apologized for being stupid etc and she was happy and it didnt matter

if i really care im less likely to make a move and even more likely to panic and be stupid at first when one is made

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Thanks that helps a lot.

posted December 17, 2018 12:24 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by hypatia238:
Interesting! I can totally see his venus in scorpio in conflict with his venus conjunct uranus playing out in relationships...

I also can understand why he felt deeply loved by you with moon in cancer and venus in scorpio...

Venus in hard aspect to Uranus with either ruling the 7th seems to manifest as avoidant attachment style, I dont like to date people with this issue, it is exhausting and gets old...

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Absolutely. In a way I do understand their need for emotional flexibility and freedom. I don't like demands being made on me either

But I do think that it can be self defeating in the long run when one paints oneself in a corner I.e one gets to be so unreliable and distant from others and others start to treat them as an accessory. Not something valued. Coz that also hurts them.

George Clooney's "Up in the air" had him play a guy whom in my opinion ,has strong Uranus aspects.

The guy is a corporate downsizer and moves from place to place to fire people (Uranus). And his life is basically lived in a suitcase.

As the movie progresses, he soon realises the importance of connections and staying close to people who matter. As his family holds him at a distance, his colleagues think him a d***.

He later finds out that the woman that he wanted to propose to is married with children and has NO intention of leaving her stable life.

That while he was very much in love with her. She saw him as just "casual(Uranus)fun(Ven)" etc. And that there is really nobody that he feels close to at all.

Of course the movie avoids the sentimentality of redemption and "mending ones ways" etc. Thank goodness. And goes straight into the character accepting their life "as is" and getting on with the business at hand.

I found it a little sad. But also quite realistic in that perhaps some people are just wired that way.

posted December 17, 2018 12:24 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Aries23Degrees:
Have you had luck with finding at least some people who do? What do you think it takes to get on with this energy in a romantic sense? Complete indifference?

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posted December 17, 2018 12:33 AM            

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Originally posted by ChildofVenus:
I think Air signs can for obvious reasons.

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Yes. I think that could make sense. It may also be why he was attracted to me in the first place. As I have Moon in 3rd house which can double up as Moon in air sometimes.

posted December 17, 2018 12:43 AM            

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Originally posted by Dumuzi:
i like intensity at least for a little while, but there's a point where i'm just done with a lot of people

i lose touch with people a lot for long periods of time too, we'll talk all the time and then life just happens and i'll turn up eventually again

me being gone has nothing to do with caring if i am

i can actually only think of one person ive gotten bored with after a long time, but i told her the truth about it and i check in occasionally to let her know im not dead because she worries otherwise and i feel bad even though i dont really feel like i can talk to her anymore

it's a lot of things, but it's become boredom through me not feeling like i can be close to her anymore and her new relationship meaning we cant have sex ever either

i liked her better single and with her first husband and also before i dropped away from everything after a bunch of **** with heroin and life and other people

kills it completely

we got along both really terribly and really well for 16 years, she's dying and i feel like a ******* because i'm not around but i don't actually know how to be anyway and don't want to

just feel guilt and that seems like a bad reason to stick around talking to someone when you've been upfront about that sort of thing anyway

i could understand why you wouldnt want to deal with that sort of thing, im guilty of some of that myself

never heard that song

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I don't think I would want to make anyone feel guilt and stick around because of that. Or because they don't want to appear like an a***.

I think one should "choose" to be in my life. And be very much happy to make that decision etc.

But at the same time, life happens. So I do need to know that I can count on the people I love. And if that feels like a "burden" to someone I am dating and they disappear. It would gut me.

I know that from their end,the emotional obesity would be too much etc. But I would think that it would benefit the relationship and upgrade it to a more emotionally mature phase.

I am not asking for heaps of affection, tea and sympathy. Just a call or visit to check that I am hanging in there. Maybe even one sleep over that i don't have to negotiate etc.

The song is one of Madonna's least popular BTW. And she is now less relevant than she was ages back. So I don't think many know it

posted December 17, 2018 01:04 AM            

I like to think of planetary energies as force or momentum. And that the outer planets, Jupiter/Saturn and the intergenerational ones Uranus, NEP and Pluto either add/diminish or negate that momentum.

So with Uranus for instance. Would one say that its the great "interrupter"? So when acting with Venus it is " The great interrupter of love feelings or relationships(Venus) "?

Imagine for instance that you are making a speech at a wedding party. Everyone is laughing, having a good time with your speech and listening attentively. That is MOMENTUM.

Then suddenly the microphone stops working, the lights go off for 5 minutes or someone in the wedding reception gets a heart attack during your speech etc. That's INTERRUPTION.

So in the end,it is harder to retain the audience and continue the momentum or impact of your speech when everyone's attention has been redirected elsewhere and the bond between you and them is compromised.

In the same way, we have a relationship with someone. Beautiful butterfly connections and wonderful conversation. Then the relationship starts. That's Venus MOMENTUM.

Then at some point life happens. Either one of you moves away to another state and it takes weeks to re-establish contact.

One of you has a car accident & is bedridden for a month or one of you loses contact with other(phone gets lost or computer crashes etc)and no matter how hard you try. You just can't seem to get back that contact /rapport. That's "Uranus DISTURBANCE"

So essentially Venus-Uranus is "Love" (Venus) interrupted(Uranus) or love(Ven) deferred (Uranus).

In that way, Uranus retains its similarities to Saturn by delaying things or making things that much harder? Needing constant monitoring and reconnection?

posted December 17, 2018 01:22 AM            

Uranus is cray cray. Saturn is delay. So when systems go off at a long a** queue in a government department for no apparent reason, is it Saturn delay or Uranus cray cray? Coz both are inconveniencing and the difference becomes irrelevant.

posted December 17, 2018 01:51 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Leo-Cancer98:
If you don’t mind me asking, what aspects in particular does your Venus make to your Saturn & Uranus? Are they difficult ones? How are your 5th & 7th houses?

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Venus 11H sq Uranus 3H
Venus conj Saturn 11H
Venus op Moon 5H
7H is empty

posted December 17, 2018 02:04 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Brenda_S:

But you're probably right about Uranus and being detached with eighth house matters. I never understood the concept of getting attached to someone after sex. (I'm the opposite actually)

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posted December 17, 2018 02:42 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Aries23Degrees:
I agree with you. I really had a hard time seeing Saturn as ruling Aqua. But then again ,I do know some Aquas that are so regressive in their outlook I.e. they are so traditional that it puts Cap to shame.

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posted December 17, 2018 03:16 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by hypatia238:
So tell me more, you feel less close after sex? Like you want to pull away and lose interest instead of feeling closer and more connected?

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posted December 17, 2018 04:36 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by hypatia238:
I think Uranus falling in the 8th would make you more detached around 8th house matters and perhaps more conservative around such matters since is ruled by Saturn, perhaps you see the world as oversexed and feel sex is over-rated..

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Having Aqua 8th H with Saturn on the 8th H cusp that's me
I am disgusted by how cheap sex has become and how they try to sexualise anything everywhere.

posted December 17, 2018 06:23 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by hypatia238:
I wonder if fixed aquarius generates some people who hate change and fear it, see it as bad, causing anxiety. They experienced changes early in life out of their control that conditioned them to fear change and rebel against it, resist it stubbornly. But evolved aquarius types use crisis as an opportunity to fall up, see change as good and use that energy inside them to help create needed changes in the world or in their life. Some aquarius types have both aspects manifest, they fear change and stubbornly resist but also create change. Change you make happen is empowering but change that you dont see coming can be debilitating unless you see that is happening for a reason, clearing the way for a new chapter or phase of life.

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I thought so too. But I think air just can't resist change. It stimulates them to no end. Even when its not laid out in a way that they understand rationaly at times.

It is Water/earth however that can get anxious and worrisome. Change to water can have them imagine the worst to the point of those fears turn to phobias

Earth is another one that finds change unnerving.The worry is towards the loss of conveniences.Or having to adjust to something that well may complicate the routine of their lives.

But what i note with Aqua is that convention and group mentality either attracts them to conformity. Or it has them rebel(sometimes even irrationally) from it.

So this rebellious nature could have them(much like Neptune) be outright dissatisfied with society. So their obsession would be towards changing its operations.

On one hand, there are Aquas who are inlove with technology. On the other hand, there are Aquas who are inlove with the vintage era.

Both have the influence of Uranus. But the base ruler(imo) is Saturn.

posted December 17, 2018 07:54 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Brenda_S:
Thanks that helps a lot.

Edit:
Do you mind posting your chart?

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https://imgur.com/a/LV42Nxh

posted December 17, 2018 08:07 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Aries23Degrees:
I don't think I would want to make anyone feel guilt and stick around because of that. Or because they don't want to appear like an a***.

I think one should "choose" to be in my life. And be very much happy to make that decision etc.

But at the same time, life happens. So I do need to know that I can count on the people I love. And if that feels like a "burden" to someone I am dating and they disappear. It would gut me.

I know that from their end,the emotional obesity would be too much etc. But I would think that it would benefit the relationship and upgrade it to a more emotionally mature phase.

I am not asking for heaps of affection, tea and sympathy. Just a call or visit to check that I am hanging in there. Maybe even one sleep over that i don't have to negotiate etc.

The song is one of Madonna's least popular BTW. And she is now less relevant than she was ages back. So I don't think many know it

I heard the song from a neighbor and it immediately had me thinking of the Venus-Uranus ex in question .lol.

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i'm not sure that she cares because i've told her that i don't really feel anything towards her anymore one way or another other than distant, and she just ignores all that and talks at me anyway though she's given me space this past year for the most part

her and i never dated, we mostly were friends because i'd flirt with her and she had a thing for me and an unhappy marriage

i can tolerate being there for people when i have to be, even strangers i can deal with their feelings to an extent

it's that i have a limit, takes years to hit it usually, but there's a point where i just can't stand it

that being said that won't necessarily make me walk away, but i can be an ******* to extreme levels and that will come out once i'm sick of someone's constant ****

people have this habit of always dumping all of their emotions on me because i'm not very reactive and i'll listen and let them talk etc

but there's a point where it's just constant and i want a break that they don't give and that's when there's problems, or if i'm just particularly impatient that day

that doesn't mean i disappear forever though, all depends on whether or not the other person can deal with me when i do say **** they don't want to hear

i've never listened to her on my own, so i only know her really old **** from my mother listening to her when i was a kid

posted December 17, 2018 08:41 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Aries23Degrees:
I wanted to ask something with those with Venus-Uranus aspect that ties into this discussion;

I like to think of planetary energies as force or momentum. And that the outer planets, Jupiter/Saturn and the intergenerational ones Uranus, NEP and Pluto either add/diminish or negate that momentum.

So with Uranus for instance. Would one say that its the great "interrupter"? So when acting with Venus it is " The great interrupter of love feelings or relationships(Venus) "?

Imagine for instance that you are making a speech at a wedding party. Everyone is laughing, having a good time with your speech and listening attentively. That is MOMENTUM.

Then suddenly the microphone stops working, the lights go off for 5 minutes or someone in the wedding reception gets a heart attack during your speech etc. That's INTERRUPTION.

So in the end,it is harder to retain the audience and continue the momentum or impact of your speech when everyone's attention has been redirected elsewhere and the bond between you and them is compromised.

In the same way, we have a relationship with someone. Beautiful butterfly connections and wonderful conversation. Then the relationship starts. That's Venus MOMENTUM.

Then at some point life happens. Either one of you moves away to another state and it takes weeks to re-establish contact.

One of you has a car accident & is bedridden for a month or one of you loses contact with other(phone gets lost or computer crashes etc)and no matter how hard you try. You just can't seem to get back that contact /rapport. That's "Uranus DISTURBANCE"

So essentially Venus-Uranus is "Love" (Venus) interrupted(Uranus) or love(Ven) deferred (Uranus).

In that way, Uranus retains its similarities to Saturn by delaying things or making things that much harder? Needing constant monitoring and reconnection?

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i think life just happens, people come and go out of each other's lives making connections and one's that are meant to last do for however long they're meant to be

uncertainty is just part of life, and some experiences are unavoidable painful or not

not everything that's meant to be is negative, and neither is all change

and in a sense with feelings, most change is gradual rather than sudden

proximity is only part of emotion, connection is more of it

i wouldn't see any difference whether i had all that interruption going or not i'd just keep saying whatever i had to say because the content would be more important than the setting

i wouldn't feel compromised by that situation, or like i wasn't going to retain the audience

i'd probably comment on it, make a joke about it being more intimate now and move on with it

no different than ******* up while playing a song, you keep going, the audience forgets because that moment where you ****** up isn't what matters it's what follows

hit a wrong string on a guitar, play the next one right keep time don't interrupt the flow or reflect

that's life too

i'm a little high so i can't remember if you were talking about saturn rule or if that was other people but i can understand how saturn ruled aquarius

with capricorn saturn is more steady, it's the things that don't change over time; movement towards something continuously through adversity

things are hard life goes on

with aquarius saturn is still steady, but in a different manner, it's the things you don't see that would happen anyway; matters of fate in a sense that define the confines of your situation

whatever trappings you face, life goes on

there's that harshness

i don't see it as interrupting some level of steadiness though, but when confined to a course you have to look for ways to navigate or destroy it

you're what stays the same though not the world

posted December 17, 2018 08:58 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by ChildofVenus:
I think Air signs can for obvious reasons.

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posted December 17, 2018 02:24 PM            

I actually know a couple with all 3 (shocking!) and they have been together for 10+ years now, married for 8 of them. They are solid as a rock and I will be VERY surprised if they ever split up.

The key is they started out as friends, and have continued that friendship into their marriage.

If their relationship was too "heavy" I bet it wouldn't last. The constant need to reassure the other person, the emphasis on being romantic all the time, etc.

posted December 18, 2018 11:00 AM            

We all have our routines and the things we do because, well, that's how they have always been done.
To a person with hard Uranus aspects to their inner planets this is a burden. While other people don't mind staying in their comfort zone, people with hard Uranus aspects feel restlessness.

That's why people with hard Venus-Uranus aspects confuse their partners and themselves, too. They always try to interrupt a routine when it gets too much.

I personally have Venus conjunct Mars and they both square Uranus.

When I feel stuck in my relationship, I just take a short trip with my friends out of the blue. My boyfriend is very understanding of that and when I'm back I feel much better because I had the chance to be apart from my boyfriend and actually miss him. That's one example and those episodes have nothing to do with how I feel about my man.

I'm a very structured person and I love planning plus my Mars is in Virgo in H6, which makes me sort of a workaholic.
But although I have a good plan I don't do things in a linear fashion, one after another. I like to start somewhere at the end with a project, do something in the middle and then jump to the start, for example.

I learned for myself that predictability kills my motivation. So I always try to do something seemingly out of the blue just to keep me mentally stimulated but always keeping the big picture in mind.

Something that looks like a short circuit for most people, is just a Uranian person's reboot to restore healthy energy levels.

posted December 18, 2018 02:19 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by HelixID:

I personally have Venus conjunct Mars and they both square Uranus.

When I feel stuck in my relationship, I just take a short trip with my friends out of the blue. My boyfriend is very understanding of that and when I'm back I feel much better because I had the chance to be apart from my boyfriend and actually miss him. That's one example and those episodes have nothing to do with how I feel about my man.

I'm a very structured person and I love planning plus my Mars is in Virgo in H6, which makes me sort of a workaholic.
But although I have a good plan I don't do things in a linear fashion, one after another. I like to start somewhere at the end with a project, do something in the middle and then jump to the start, for example.

I learned for myself that predictability kills my motivation. So I always try to do something seemingly out of the blue just to keep me mentally stimulated but always keeping the big picture in mind.

Something that looks like a short circuit for most people, is just a Uranian person's reboot to restore healthy energy levels.

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This As I suspected. I am the same. But have no Uranus aspects besides a parallel aspect to Mc/Ic axis.

I call it emotional distance. I need it. I find it really awful to live in anyones pocket. But i wouldnt say it is tantamount to "ghosting".

My gripe with the Ura-Ven ex is that he didnt know the difference.The former strengthens perspective and is purposeful whilst the latter is random, chaotic and is very hurtful.