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Author
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Topic: So much hate against Valentine's Day!
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Violets
Knowflake Posts: 4396
From:
Registered: Apr 2011
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posted February 03, 2014 10:36 PM
  
quote:
Originally posted by Randall:
I like Violet's view of it.
Thanks!  IP: Logged |
aquaguy91
Moderator Posts: 10765
From: Wankety Wankerson
Registered: Jan 2012
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posted February 03, 2014 10:42 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Randall:
I've never been put in the doghouse for my beliefs. But if it makes my woman feel more secure and lets her know she's important to me, then I have no problem suspending my beliefs to make her happy. Relationships are about sacrifice. This is really a minor one as far as sacrifices go. And women can give to their man on V Day also.
I understand why you do that because Charmaine is a good girl. However I'm talking about the general rule. The fact is men are generally expected to foot the bill for dates and valentines etc. while women have no such expectations. Now you might find a good girl who will meet you halfway , but generally women feel entitled to these things. The kicker is the woman might decide to leave you tommorow and society tells you to deal with it. All this chivalry stuff was appropriate for the old days but isn't anymore. Back in the old days men did that stuff for their wives to show appreciation for their love and loyalty. But today we live in a selfish "me,me,me" society and there is little loyalty. So how is it in a mans best interest to wine and dine a woman and treat her like a princess (especially when he feels forced to do so)when she could get bored with him tomorrow and ditch him?IP: Logged |
Randall
Webmaster Posts: 50193
From: Saturn next to Charmaine
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted February 03, 2014 10:54 PM
The problem isn't V Day. The real problem is that some men think they can buy attraction with gifts. That doesn't work. So, it's really no surprise when women walk away. IP: Logged |
T
Knowflake Posts: 11616
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted February 03, 2014 10:58 PM
It might be my Leo planets intercepted in the 7th speaking, but i say any excuse to shower love and prezzies on a significant other is alright by me!TBH i think i'd be more excited by it if i were a man with someone special in my life. What a great excuse to go all out and spoil someone.....make them feel special and be able to show your love for them, uninhibited. I see it as another excuse to 'love hard' and go all out. You dont have to succumb to all the commerialized crap and teddy bears and chocolates either. The more creative and unique the better. IP: Logged |
StarlightSmileSupreme
Knowflake Posts: 9071
From: neptune
Registered: Nov 2012
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posted February 03, 2014 10:58 PM
It's the thought that counts...IP: Logged |
T
Knowflake Posts: 11616
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted February 03, 2014 11:00 PM
sorry if i missed the point of the thread. i only skimmed the first post so far......IP: Logged |
StarlightSmileSupreme
Knowflake Posts: 9071
From: neptune
Registered: Nov 2012
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posted February 03, 2014 11:08 PM
Let's just say if you got money to burn and you have a gf/bf, fiance/fiancee or husband/wife you best spend some of it on them for Valentine's Day because they will probably act cold the rest of the year if you don't!And if you are a Po Boy, just do something nice like homemade cookies or chocolate covered strawberries. If you are an eccentric couple, think of something off-the-wall and way-out.
Nearly anyone can afford flowers from Wal Mart. I see last minute shoppers at Wal Greens on Valentine's Day in line with last minute gifts like candies and stuffed bears.
Haha it's funny seeing these people that just wish it were over so they run to Wal Greens or 7/11 at the last minute. It's like, oh boy gotta buy that gift or I'll never hear the end of it! I bet their loved ones don't even know! IP: Logged |
Xodian
Knowflake Posts: 911
From: Canada
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted February 03, 2014 11:33 PM
See, I maybe in a different mindset here, but seriously, I DO want to do all of those things for my wife  ; And not because I am expected to. I just love seeing her reaction when she gets a big surprise every Valentine's day and yes I do try to make each and every Val Day a unique and different experience. This year, I plan on surprising her with all the trims and prims of a Val Day celebration (i.e. Breakfast in Bed, Dinner at a 5 star Resturant, Giant Teddy Bear, Roses, Chocolate, etc.) and then tell her that we are heading off to Banff and the Canadian Rockies at the end of February  . Can't wait to see her reaction . So yes, I DO want to bring flowers, I DO want to bring chocolate, I DO want to bring Giant Teddy Bears; Not because I am obligated to but because I want to and because I do want to see her happy; On Val Day AND Every day. IP: Logged |
DeepFreeze
Knowflake Posts: 4348
From: Pluto with Barbiegirl19
Registered: Nov 2013
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posted February 03, 2014 11:35 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Randall:
The problem isn't V Day. The real problem is that some men think they can buy attraction with gifts. That doesn't work. So, it's really no surprise when women walk away.
I suck at it anyway. LOL IP: Logged |
aquaguy91
Moderator Posts: 10765
From: Wankety Wankerson
Registered: Jan 2012
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posted February 03, 2014 11:37 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Randall:
The problem isn't V Day. The real problem is that some men think they can buy attraction with gifts. That doesn't work. So, it's really no surprise when women walk away.
well I partly agree with you. I agree with you that gifts don't buy love or attraction, so again you have to ask "what's the purpose"? Also I don't think that's why women leave. I think people in general are just selfish and lack loyalty. As a man I'm very uncomfortable with the idea of spending tons on a girl who may leave me high and dry tommorow. I would have to really trust a girl to do that. I would have no problem doing those things "if" I found a girl worth it. But the thing is she would have to meet me halfway, I'm not interested in jumping through hoops anymore, she has to prove herself to me too. IP: Logged |
StarlightSmileSupreme
Knowflake Posts: 9071
From: neptune
Registered: Nov 2012
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posted February 03, 2014 11:39 PM
quote:
Originally posted by DeepFreeze:
I suck at it anyway. LOL
Well I expect a lot out of you this year, DeepFreeze and you best deliver. I better hear good things! IP: Logged |
StarlightSmileSupreme
Knowflake Posts: 9071
From: neptune
Registered: Nov 2012
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posted February 03, 2014 11:41 PM
quote:
Originally posted by aquaguy91:
well I partly agree with you. I agree with you that gifts don't buy love or attraction, so again you have to ask "what's the purpose"? Also I don't think that's why women leave. I think people in general are just selfish and lack loyalty. As a man I'm very uncomfortable with the idea of spending tons on a girl who may leave me high and dry tommorow. I would have to really trust a girl to do that. I would have no problem doing those things "if" I found a girl worth it. But the thing is she would have to meet me halfway, I'm not interested in jumping through hoops anymore, she has to prove herself to me too.
Aqua, seriously, you must let go of your mindset. It is taking all the fun out of your life!
IP: Logged |
aquaguy91
Moderator Posts: 10765
From: Wankety Wankerson
Registered: Jan 2012
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posted February 03, 2014 11:44 PM
quote:
Originally posted by StarlightSmileSupreme:
Aqua, seriously, you [b] must let go of your mindset. It is taking all the fun out of your life! [/B]
I am just a realist. No Fun? I have plenty of fun lolIP: Logged |
aquaguy91
Moderator Posts: 10765
From: Wankety Wankerson
Registered: Jan 2012
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posted February 03, 2014 11:46 PM
quote:
Originally posted by T:
It might be my Leo planets intercepted in the 7th speaking, but i say any excuse to shower love and prezzies on a significant other is alright by me!TBH i think i'd be more excited by it if i were a man with someone special in my life. What a great excuse to go all out and spoil someone.....make them feel special and be able to show your love for them, uninhibited. I see it as another excuse to 'love hard' and go all out. You dont have to succumb to all the commerialized crap and teddy bears and chocolates either. The more creative and unique the better.
Why would you have to be a man? If you really think it would be fun to get someone presents, do it. IP: Logged |
Kerosene
unregistered
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posted February 03, 2014 11:50 PM
Okay my opinion is being especially romantic for one day only is really stupid.If you're going to ever give chocolates LOL.... Do it often...
same with flowers.
Although I think most people know that Im into that type of thing.. yeah so Ive never had deal with receiving that **** . With relationships you should be spontaneous often..
So yeah this day is a boring concept to me because if you going to be spontaneous for one day of the year than Im not going to stay with you. SORRRRRRY.
Boring ass people get the boot quickly.
I don't date basic people.
Sag dsc In my longest relationship we use to explore old abandoned houses and make out all over the place..
Yeah my weekends were most interesting than this special day of the year LMFAO IP: Logged |
DeepFreeze
Knowflake Posts: 4348
From: Pluto with Barbiegirl19
Registered: Nov 2013
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posted February 03, 2014 11:52 PM
quote:
Originally posted by aquaguy91:
[QUOTE]Originally posted by StarlightSmileSupreme:
[b] Aqua, seriously, you [b] must let go of your mindset. It is taking all the fun out of your life! [/B]
I am just a realist. No Fun? I have plenty of fun lol[/B][/QUOTE]It's too bad that at least half of your "realism" only exists in your head. LMAO IP: Logged |
Kerosene
unregistered
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posted February 03, 2014 11:54 PM
Actually my friends are ridiculously fun...
Everyday if valentines day when were hanging out.
We just get wild and amorous together.
Again im not that close with boring people.IP: Logged |
PixieJane
Moderator Posts: 6029
From: CA
Registered: Oct 2010
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posted February 03, 2014 11:55 PM
I'm fairly neutral about V-Day, though I do observe it. My current partner has a Cancer moon, so it's a good idea. But I don't get her (or anyone else) cards or anything like that, I get stuff that is relevant to our relationship. If I wanted to take issue with it then I suppose that yes, it is commercialized, but it's also plugged into a much greater problem: modern American society dismisses all forms of love other than romantic as trivial at best, which has multiple bad effects. One, people feel like losers if they don't have a special someone and this holiday really brings it out, and it's more true of women than men, so not only are men spending more on this day but women are spending more throughout the year to land a man because her self-worth is defined by having one...and that can get her to accept very unhealthy relationships as it's better than "being alone." If they don't have "the one" then they feel unloved, friends and family don't count (I've seen men fall victim to this sort of thinking as well), and thus they feel worthless as human beings, and I believe that's willfully engineered to make a buck which is evil. Another side effect is the devaluing of the family (especially extended family) also makes people more vulnerable which was important to the rise of big government to take care of things whereas countries that spend a lot less sometimes do a lot better because there family helps each other instead of being someone you need to get away from if you have any self-respect. And that disempowers people (with the notable exception of those from toxic homes). Of course to replace friends & family then one must turn to "true love" (which is often burdened by unrealistic expectations by both genders). As if all the other forms of love were somehow "false." The Ancient Greeks knew better, and we'd be healthier and happier if we remembered that, too. Naturally, the fashion industry does all it can to make women feel undesirable and then sell them their snake oil, and they're now moving to ensnare the men as well (just as tobacco companies once ensnared women) and I think the only reason they haven't succeeded is because of the economy, not many men have the money to become metrosexuals and haven't been brainwashed to believe that looks are everything (plus most 20+ women--as you can see commenting about anywhere including LL--don't like men more fashion conscious than them, at least not as sexual partners) so they're a tougher market (but when the economy improves I expect that to change). Valentine's is just one more way to make the sale through the rest of the year (and get a few more bucks from the men). Still, that's how I see it in modern America, not historically and not necessarily other countries. And again, I observe it, though more with sentiment than passion. And more importantly, NOT in ways that big business would profit from (at least those seeking to profit from the holiday) and not with the idea that all other forms of love are of little (or even no) value. IP: Logged |
StarlightSmileSupreme
Knowflake Posts: 9071
From: neptune
Registered: Nov 2012
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posted February 03, 2014 11:58 PM
quote:
Originally posted by PixieJane:
One, people feel like losers if they don't have a special someone and this holiday really brings it out, and it's more true of women than men, so not only are men spending more on this day but women are spending more throughout the year to land a man because her self-worth is defined by having one...and that can get her to accept very unhealthy relationships as it's better than "being alone." If they don't have "the one" then they feel unloved, friends and family don't count (I've seen men fall victim to this sort of thinking as well), and thus they feel worthless as human beings, and I believe that's willfully engineered to make a buck which is evil.
This might sound cynical. Some are just glad they don't have to deal with any of it!  IP: Logged |
aquaguy91
Moderator Posts: 10765
From: Wankety Wankerson
Registered: Jan 2012
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posted February 04, 2014 12:03 AM
quote:
Originally posted by DeepFreeze:
It's too bad that at least half of your "realism" only exists in your head. LMAO
Not hardly, I live in reality unlike most people. Most people would rather bury their heads in the sand than face reality. IP: Logged |
Kerosene
unregistered
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posted February 04, 2014 12:07 AM
Lol every holiday has its political agenda....I just think the concept of valentines day is silly because yeah New years is when straightedge people sooooooo f'ed up. 4th of july-fire works and MURICCAAAA'
Christmas- Festivities- nostaligia. BUT LOVE?
love should not be bound for one day only...
Like what crazy stuff do you do on V day?
Like doing anal for your partner.
Or that 3some? LOL. IP: Logged |
StarlightSmileSupreme
Knowflake Posts: 9071
From: neptune
Registered: Nov 2012
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posted February 04, 2014 12:09 AM
I feel the same way, Kero. Most in relationships don't. A woman gets into a relationship so she has a partner for New Years and Valentine's Day. That's a big deal for most gals and if someone doesn't come through on those days, most women get really ****** off because they feel like they are single again and they get into a relationship to feel connected. IP: Logged |
PixieJane
Moderator Posts: 6029
From: CA
Registered: Oct 2010
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posted February 04, 2014 12:09 AM
Having read the thread I remembered something from back when the Avengers came out a couple of years ago. It was Mother's Day and my partner's boy (her kids have considered me part of the family for awhile now) wanted to take me to see the Avengers in honor of it. I told him that other than Iron Man, which I remembered very little of, I hadn't seen any of the movies that led up to it, so let me see if there was something I'd like to see more. He didn't want to do it, he wanted to take me to see the Avengers, and I'd love it, "It's 3D!" He was so excited over this and I was so impressed (and mistaken!) that he'd saved enough money to take the both of us (neither his biological mom nor sister wanted to see it) that I agreed to it. Once there I quickly realized I was supposed to pay for both of us, including drinks and some popcorn that he wanted. Luckily I had a very good sense of humor about it...he was 9, and I think he really believed I would love it (after all he did, so surely I would, too, doesn't everyone automatically love big explosions and epic fight scenes?), so I let him get away with it. I was bored for much of the movie (glanced at my watch a lot) but he loved it (and assumed I did, too, how could I not?), I wasn't going to ruin the experience for him, especially not after paying nearly $40 for the experience. 'Course he can't expect to get away with that as an adult, be it Mother's Day or Valentine's Day. IP: Logged |
Kerosene
unregistered
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posted February 04, 2014 12:11 AM
Mothers day is more important as you get older...
Like you rarely interact with her HAHAsame with fathers day. IP: Logged |
DeepFreeze
Knowflake Posts: 4348
From: Pluto with Barbiegirl19
Registered: Nov 2013
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posted February 04, 2014 12:11 AM
quote:
Originally posted by aquaguy91:
Not hardly, I live in reality unlike most people. Most people would rather bury their heads in the sand than face reality.
Most of your "realism" is pessimistic views on women and/or relationships/sex/dating. (discrimination) It's not working for you so you've adopted these ridiculous viewpoints. It IS working for some of us... A lot of us.
So maybe it's time for you to reevaluate your thinking and figure out who has their head in the sand.
IP: Logged |
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