posted August 04, 2009 03:35 AM            

Even more: http://i722.photobucket.com/albums/ww230/backdowntomars/LoadedRomanceChart4.gif

posted August 04, 2009 05:38 PM            

lol, gotta love those Virgos!

I’m going to a party that night as well. Since the job prospects aren’t looking too good I am a little worried because I need a costume. Maybe I could try to make one since I have so much time on my hands, lol. The night before I am going to a concert, it should be a fun couple of days. I really need it. I haven’t had fun in about a year!

posted August 05, 2009 06:43 PM            

Gotta love that Aquarian (rising) ingenuity!

Plus, I recycled!

posted August 05, 2009 10:36 PM            

Yes, you must make your own costume, store bought ones are cheating!
I once made my whole family be the cast of 'The Wizard of Oz' You should see the pic! It's hilarious! Everyone is frowning but me, I was quite happy in my Dorothy outfit. Took me two blasted weeks to make all those! So if you have a concert the night before, best not to leave anything to last minute.

I thought I was the only person to use cereal boxes for stuff. I make a serious effort to only have one bag of trash a week. That's not easy for a house of 5 people. Anything that can burn goes in my fire pit.
And I use cereal boxes to wrap xmas gifts. My kids are always opening gifts in pics that looks like chex, or cheerios, but really there is a shirt in there or a pair of pants. Ingenuity, you said it!

posted August 05, 2009 11:06 PM            

The Wizard of Oz cast sounds awesome - I do have to see the pic! I can't believe it only took 2 weeks! I think I could make my own costume. I want to go as a goddess so that should be easy – just fling some white fabric around myself and cinch it with a gold sash = instant goddess! Actually, I should be Psyche since I’ll be having a “Psyche Return” that way if guys ask if I am a goddess I can explain how I am actually a mortal and have to find a god before actually becoming one – I’ve got game already! I don’t know about walking around NYC with white cloth dragging on the ground, guess I’d have to make a bustle type thing, darn, I am making it in my head! I probably won’t though, knowing me…

posted August 08, 2009 01:27 AM            

I'm liking this better though...

posted August 08, 2009 11:18 AM              

connections....connections!

though i use placidus/koch houses we have mostly same cusp signs - and i can identify especially with your first and second compLETEly.

one more eerie fact - you were born in SF and live in NY. i was born outside NY and live outside SF...go figure! and i am an ox and you a goat. two pieces filling the same puzzle?

posted August 10, 2009 05:31 AM            

It was my first day on the job at a tech company and when I arrived I was led into this huge conference room where a bunch of people were sitting at this oval table. I sat down, wondering what was going on because I thought it was just going to be me and the HR lady going through policy stuff. It turns out that it was “Sexual Harassment Day” lol, the head HR guy was there for one day giving the annual Sex. Har. lecture or whatever so everyone had to attend. Perfect, get the new person to sign the sheet saying she was there, brilliant. So I was sitting there and I could hear some guys laughing loudly coming down the hallway. The door opens and in walks this guy. He was wearing a light sage green t-shirt that made his eyes look almost crystal clear behind black wire framed glasses. He had thick eyebrows and lashes, black hair, pale smooth skin and a stubbly beard – he was really handsome. Not cute, but handsome, like a man. From the moment he walked in, he stopped talking and he stared directly at me. I actually turned bashful (so unlike me) because he was staring so hard! I was looking everywhere else but at him and he, of course, sat directly across from me so there I was looking at the ceiling, the flat screen on the other wall, the table – he just wouldn’t back down. During the break I went to use the ladies room, actually to just look at myself to make sure I didn’t have something on my face or in my hair or something and as I was walking out he popped out of nowhere and said “You have very pretty hair, are you seeking anyone?” I was taken aback by this – who the hell does this? I was practically running back to the conference room in heels so I said “Yes!” – he gave me an easy out , I thought. Back in the conference room, he was looking at the ceiling, the flat screen on the other wall, the table and I was looking at him! Then the meeting was over and he practically sprinted out of there.

About an hour later I was given the grand tour. We passed by some offices and the HR lady introduced me to everyone. Then we get to this one office – there were pictures of fractals on the wall and some video game stuff and some Kinex looking sculpture and loud music. Behind the desk was, guess who... When he saw we were standing there he slouched down in his chair so low – HR lady was like “Steve, I’d like you to meet Veronica, she will be working in the finance department”. He muttered a ”Hey” and did one of those single wave-waves, the “whatever” wave, while I was all flappy, smiley and giggly “Hi!”what a dork.

So I went home and called my aunt and told her about him – I was like “Can you believe it? What a dumb thing to say you have pretty hair, blah, blah couldn’t he have just said ‘hi, my name is whatever’? Strike up a conversation?” She said “Obviously you like him or you wouldn’t be going on and on about it”. I thought, hmmm, maybe. Then I couldn’t get him out of my mind, all during work the next day I kept imagining that he’d see me, pull me into an empty room and we’d be all over each other. I was thinking one of these thoughts at my desk so much that eventually I needed to leave my desk and get a soda to help calm me down and guess who is at the machine – wearing a crisp white button down and jeans, looking so amazing…Aahhhh I was screaming in my head but I managed to say “Hello!” all dippy and overenthusiastically. He was different, more confident. He said “Hi, so are you liking it so far?” and I did my Lucille Ball-esque raspberry, eye rolling thing and was like “Plltt, NO!” He said “Well that was an overzealous no!” and we started laughing and he was like “see ya later” and walks away…I felt like a limp noodle. I don’t even think I actually bought a soda. The next day I saw him at a nearby café at lunch time and he was on line and I was two people behind him. I was thinking hurry up old ladies in front of me, I need to talk to this guy!, luckily they just ordered hard rolls so I got to pull my “oh, hey” I’m so casually talking to you here. He was very nice but quiet. I was trying to make small talk about the phone system (dork) but my food was ready before his and he was like “okay see ya later, I don’t want your grilled cheese to get cold” while I was doing my best flirty, small talking Sandra Bullock impersonation. I was like ”right…bye”. Damn. I would still have these naughty little thoughts about him and I really wanted to know more about him, so for the next week I did a little observing…I saw that he wore a backpack most of the time instead of having a briefcase, he liked “Electronic Gaming” magazine and seemed to always have a copy rolled up in his hand(that should have been a sign of things to come), his shoes were surprisingly spiffy considering his casual-cool outfits and much to my surprise – he had an awesome car. Not that a car matters to me, especially in the areas I live and work in (NYC & NY ‘burbs), but his car shocked me. I thought that if he did have a car, it would be forest green or dark blue, mid size sedan or small SUV, maybe even a hybrid. Boy was I wrong! He drove a cherry red, “roadster” type, sporty coupe with the engine that makes noise. Oh man. (I think I miss the car – Lola - more than I miss him, ha ha). I was shocked - he was a sweet, smart, geeky guy but there was an edge – I was intrigued. So, about a week and a half into the job I decide that I am leaving it in about 2 or 3 weeks (that’s how I roll) so I need to make something happen with this guy now, if anything is meant to happen. I used to see him at that café around lunch time every day, and he was always alone writing stuff, using his PDA or reading his magazines but I would just walk in, say hi or wave, buy my stuff and leave. One day I gathered up all of my courage and said to myself “You have to make that move”. So I walk in, he gives me the one handed wave, I buy my stuff, walk up to his table and say ”Do you mind if I have a seat?” and he said ”go right ahead”. “He was so shocked he knocked over his fries as he did the “go ahead” sweeping hand gesture dork meets dork…

We had the most awesome conversation. I told him about my “seeing someone” fib, he understood – he said that he knew he scared me because he let his nerves take over and he couldn’t form complete sentences. He complimented me left and right, even down to my earrings (his Venus is in Libra) and the rest is history…

It turned out he was planning on leaving to freelance full time around the same time that I planned on leaving so my timing was perfect – he actually left the company before I did!

…So it started out all sweet and sappy and moved very, very quickly (he wanted me to move in with him after dating for 2 weeks – I am glad I didn’t) but...part of that “edge” that I liked so much turned out to be alcoholism (I have Mars opp Neptune, yuck). I know this story so well because we used to have to rehash it when he’d call me up crying after we broke up for the 1000th time. Now we hate each other, deny each other’s existence. It’s all very healthy, lol. I’m sure he is talking crap about me to other girls to garner sympathy…

posted August 10, 2009 06:21 AM            

So, what happened between you both? Or are you getting to that part? *impatience!*

posted August 11, 2009 08:06 AM            

What it boiled down to was this: We were not compatible. Plain and simple. The thing is, he could not accept that. It is almost as if he didn’t want to be wrong. Maybe that is why he always brought up “Oh, when we first met…” – we couldn’t have had just some fluke experience and a series of coincidences, it had to be ~~~destiny~~~…He knew I was “the one” and he is never, ever wrong…I mean, he dated the same girl throughout high school and even a couple years after that and then a girl he met in college for years. He was not a big dater. He obviously wanted someone to just “be there”. I on the other hand, dated plenty, relationships not so much, the longest was 6 months. I remember a week into our relationship he said “people are so nosy…” I said “What do you mean?”…”some girl asked me if you were my girlfriend, I guess she sees us together…” I laughed one of those loud “I’m embarrassed” laughs. He gave me a look like “well?”...TIME OUT…I absolutely, positively hate the words “boyfriend” and “girlfriend”. It’s like, what are we, in second grade? I like phrases like “we are together” or even “we are a couple”, boyfriend/girlfriend, it just sounds like whining to me. So, I didn’t give him a direct answer, I just went on about how the social systems in corporations are a lot like high school. So fast forward a little while, we get close pretty quickly and we were more couple-like and a few days later he says “with you going back to school and me working mostly out of the house, you should just move in with me…” I was like “Huh?” “Yeah, we get along so well, I think it would be easy for us to live together”…T.O…Hmm, moving in after a two week “whirlwind” doesn’t sound sane to me (“sane” is a key word here). So I make a joke, of course, about moving my purple chair and how it clashes with his stuff but I bring up how I live closer to my college and he backs off. I’m glad he didn’t press it. I mean, I did like spending time with him but moving in was a little crazy. Plus - he would always make little jokes about getting married too (“so I guess I meet your mom after we elope?”, “I think my last name sounds better with your first name” – WTF?). Any girl would eat this up, right? BUT, since I wasn’t that girl he did get distant and critical and this was the beginning of what should have been the end. After about two good months, that is when we started the on and off rollercoaster from hell…

There were a few issues:

He was very successful, creative and just all around brilliant but he had no sense of humor. I mean, he did find me to be funny, and I appreciate that but…he would point out that I was funny. I can’t remember laughing out loud about anything he said, maybe afterwards in a “what a tool” way. Plus…

He was super-duper-duper sensitive. Even though he thought I was “a trip” I had to watch what I said around him because he would take offense at the slightest thing. I hate walking on eggshells for anyone (Aqua rising, Mars in Gemini) so this was a huge problem. I wouldn’t even realize that I said something to offend him until I got the cold shoulder or the “okay, I’m tired, going home” if I said something “wrong”. Here is an example: One night he was talking about a movie we saw together (we saw a million movies together) but he referred to it by title and I said “I don’t remember seeing that with you, must’ve been some other girl!”. I thought I was being cute – I even said it in an exaggerated way – but we didn’t talk for the rest of the night. We could not debate, and if you have seen some of my posts here, I love to debate. He would just close off. Just go back to his computer and game design table and…

That was another thing: The games and the computer. I know it was his livelihood but if that is all you can think about then don’t date a Leo. If I am in the room I must have your attention! If I am in your bed, after sex, I DEMAND TOTAL ATTENTION!!! Cuddle me, touch me, hold me, something to that effect. I think his side of the bed had an eject button because right after sex he would spring right up and head to the computer, or just sit up and get the laptop which was strategically placed by the edge of the bed. I mean, how could he resist the urge to just touch and caress and be touched and caressed all night (meow)? How many times can I come up behind him and do the sexy ”baby, come back to bed” thing (and hear “I’m almost done”)? One time I got so mad I said: “Why not just put the laptop behind my head, you can do two things at once, multitask…” He didn’t find it funny. I just got the head-tilted-downward-eyes-above-the-glasses glare, you know the one that teachers give students….Speaking of which…

He used to lecture instead of talking. He did used to do seminars, so that is probably why he had that “Q&A” style of talking. Like : “You know what Condoleeza Rice’s former job was?...(“class, class, anyone” pause for answer before continuing the story)…” It was so annoying. Then the story was 8 hours long and ended with me oohing and aahing over some website that validated his points. Not to mention the “take home exams” – “Did you watch that show about Edgar Cayce that I told you to watch?” – like, are you going to quiz me on it? Sheesh! I have to admit though, he did acknowledge that he has the tendency to lecture. I thought I was the only one but a few months later he told me about how one of his clients got mad because he felt that he treated him “like an idiot”…

Speaking of idiotic (nice segue) – he didn’t like to try different things at all. We would do the same thing, every night. It was so predictable. Movie or two, take out or fast food, couch, bed, computer…There was no variation on that either, it was always that way. Why didn’t I cook? I love to cook so much, so why didn’t I cook? Well, I cook pretty “exotic” things, things like vegetables and seafood using strange spices like curry and cumin, odd methods like steaming and grilling, cheeses that looked weird and smelled funny. He liked burgers, fries, chicken in finger/nugget/wing form and the oh-so-exotic boneless spareribs from the Chinese place (drenched in ketchup, of course). He ate like a 5 year old. When we went out (rare), he wanted to go to, (I am crying a little), chain restaurants. Need I remind, we live in one of the most culturally diverse places in the world with every type of restaurant you could think of and he chose to go to the most expensive TGIFridays in the world! I would rather have a slice of pizza in the Port Authority than eat there, but I did, many times. I even had him order for me, not because of the Libra Moon indecision, but because I really didn’t care what I ate there. He did change things up once or twice and we went to…a diner! I tried to bring home Indian food a few times. I usually have mutter paneer which I explained was cheese cubes in sauce, ”that doesn’t look like cheese”. I would order egg foo young from the Chinese place, which I explained was a vegetable omelet with gravy - ”that doesn’t look like an omelet”….Yikes… He did like to try different beverages though…

I really feel weird about talking about this but it is all anonymous (Steve is not his real name btw and I am not Veronica), he was a weekend alcoholic (Moon in Pisces). That is a true thing, not like the person who goes out and has a brewski to celebrate the end of the work week; he would buy a bottle of rum and a case of beer every weekend for himself. Not for me, I don’t really drink that much, I can’t (see: 6th house issues). He would knock himself out by day and be groggy but working at night. Some Saturdays he was usually busy with shows and stuff though and would do this at night. The whole thing was strange. We rarely hung out on Saturday days now that I think about it– he would do his shows and I would hang out with my friends or cousins and do cultural things, eat Cuban food, you know.

I was the one who got fed up all of the time and “ended things”. He was fine with how things were going, that was rather disturbing to me because I thought it was just god-awful and boring. I always had to do the “it’s not working” thing. But then in the middle of the night, I thought ”maybe this is how relationships are…boring, predictable, maybe that is why people complain all of the time. Maybe I should suck it up. He is handsome, brilliant, has a great career and can provide…oh, plus I am lonely” Then, I would get an e-mail with “Us” or “You and I” or “Missing you…” in the subject line or a (drunken) tearful call in the middle of the night all going over how “when we first met…”, how he could “feel” me missing him, I am the “one bright spot” in his life and ending with a sort of “proposal” “…I was even thinking of marriage…” The coincidental timing thing always got to me, not the marriage talk. I would state the issues (not affectionate enough, drinking, lecturing) and he would change for a day or two and it was back to the same thing. But one time we argued so bad, ended up insulting each other and we never fully bounced back from that. So we started the fighting and sex, fighting and sex, let’s just have sex phase. This went on longer than the coupled up couple phase. We fought using almost every method of communication – letter, phone, e-mail, text, IM - we never faxed each other but if we had one nearby we would have…

It fully ended when I saw that another girl wrote to him on his website email account (don’t ask) the day before he sent one of his love you/marriage proposal emails and came back to him. That was a real “Ross and Rachel” moment for us (“We were on a break!”) but that was really the last straw for me, cheating, even when “on a break”, when talking about “love” is a bunch of ******** . So I wrote the girl and told her all about him. Surprisingly, she was on my side and stopped talking to him altogether. She wanted to be friends but how weird would that be, I don’t think so. (…Speaking of “Ross” from friends, he acted a lot like him, talked like him and even had that whiny, mopey disposition like him. David Schwimmer is a Scorpio in real life and they say he is also a tool so picture David Schwimmer in the role of “Steve”…)

I changed my cell phone number, cancelled my email account, changed my IM name, I did everything but move. I haven’t heard from him or seen him since. <every once in a while I look at his website though, sshhh!>

Saturn was going through my 7th house during the entire ordeal and I did learn a lesson. Well, I really learned what I want from a man and a relationship. I had just been dating and having fun before but this was a true test.

Live and Learn…

posted August 12, 2009 07:34 AM            

a) David Schwimmer in the role of "Steve". I'm already doing an "eeeew"/little bit of sick in the back of my throat.

b) Unadventurous eaters. I am so with you on this one. Food is such a pleasure. It's creativity and it's passion. I went out with a man who actually frigging sniffed everything I'd made before he'd try it, usually with a mouth the shape of a dog's arsepiece. It didn't work out. I am a fabulous cook and I was truly offended. And he'd throw out anything if it had gone one hour beyond its recommended "best before" date. Live a little, you know? Get e-coli, it's fun. It is so important to chime with someone on the food issue. Now I am with someone who would eat locusts in jelly if I I'd made them, and who wants to try out the Indonesian place in town. Atta boy. To me being unadventurous with food = crap in bed. It's not true actually but that's the association I make in my head and if I date someone who won't experiment with food they usually don't get a shag. Sex to me equals food. I can't be doing with someone too prissy. I want to taste someone's armpit and if they won't even eat peas there's no way they'll want to taste my armpit, dig?

c) Your use of the word "tool". Twice. Love it. I also like the expression "nobjockey", which is also someone who is being a bit of a "tool".

quote:

---

I can’t remember laughing out loud about anything he said, maybe afterwards in a “what a tool” way.

---

posted August 12, 2009 07:34 AM            

quote:

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he would point out that I was funny

---

e)

quote:

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“Why not just put the laptop behind my head, you can do two things at once, multitask…”

---

And isn't everybody creative?? In some way??? I think so. But if you didn't cut the mustard in the Creativity League then you were nobody. He'd surround himself with graphic designers and textile artists and music makers, all of whom were complete tools, but whose job title was cool.

quote:

---

We fought using almost every method of communication – letter, phone, e-mail, text, IM - we never faxed each other but if we had one nearby we would have…

---

You know, I must point out how funny you have been in this thread.

All this talk of Ross and Rachel makes me remember that quote
"And just so you know, it's not that common, it doesn't happen to everyone, and it IS a big deal.".

posted August 12, 2009 11:56 AM            

I hear you...
*mind games
*fixed
*alcholic
*scorpio
*break up 1000 times
*roller coaster ride from hell
*sensitive, eggshells
*another girl who sides with you.

posted August 12, 2009 10:59 PM            

quote:

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It was very cathartic to character assasinate my ex- beaus here today, thank you

---

I know right, I just hope “Steve” doesn’t have this sudden urge to get into astrology…

quote:

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usually with a mouth the shape of a dog's arsepiece.

---

lol, I can picture that! I’m glad I never told “Steve” about my bouts of food poisoning as a result of being so adventurous, that would have really scared him!

I know what you are saying about the creative types and their little clique. They always want to appear to be so “deep” but their choice of friends can be so superficial. Not all are like that but I have met quite a few of the “…and what do you do for a living? Oh that’s interesting…” variety.

I would be a little scared if someone asked if I was spiritual, I’d be afraid they would try to get me to convert or something. What kind of question is that? Weird…he must have picked up your “weird” vibe lol

quote:

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Did you write him a 16 page letter "front AND back".

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Steve probably wouldn’t have read it all either!

posted August 13, 2009 12:07 AM            

I think everyone has to go through that Scorpio experience…Either you fall in love with them and stay with them forever or you get so turned off that you never want to get involved with another one…so far I have only met women in the latter category :P

posted August 14, 2009 08:38 PM            

Agreed MVM, especially on the synastry tip. I too have the big eye roll when I click on a post that I think is regarding asteroid usage in the natal chart and it turns out to be a synastry/composite thread!

I have been "into" astrology since I was 10 year old really (my mom had a copy of Linda Goodman's Love Signs and I was intrigued) but when it came to love I never, ever did a synastry chart. I was just too busy being in the relationship! I did like to know the guys signs but I can honestly say that I have never done a synastry chart with someone I went out with. Even after the relationship has ended, I look at the name asteroid (which is new to me, learned it from this site) and I note the Venus and Mars sign but I feel that the best way to judge how a relationship will be is to actually BE IN IT!

That said, I do like to know about MYSELF and how I AM when it comes to relationships. Check out my posts re: love, it is usually asking what this conjunct that natally means. YOU CANNOT CONTROL OTHER PEOPLE NO MATTER WHAT A CHART TELLS YOU! I grew up with a double Cap mom and Virgo w/Cancer rising dad who had to explain or set examples to show to their little Leo on a daily basis that I can't control people and I have learned that lesson well. I do know that I can control what I do, that is what I use astrology for and I like to know how others act for themselves as well, that is why I ask questions re: asteroids, dating preferences, etc.

ETA: plus I abhor “loving from afar”, “crushes” and “pining” from people who have graduated high school! People are just people, they can’t control you either so just make a move it won’t kill ya! If anyone actually could die of embarrassment, not just over love but over anything (I’m someone who gets a migraine/motion sickness in a wobbly elevator – I have had many embarrassing health related moments), that person would have been me, many times over. I’m still here and still optimistic!

Break out! Be Free!

Because of the migraines, I have thrown up in public (many times in fact, since I was a little kid) and even passed out in public (once). One time I was at a job interview, it was a humid day (one of my triggers) and I was wearing a too-tight blouse (another big trigger) and the interviewer had the most droning voice (aggravating the triggers). He just kept going on and on until and I turned into Penelope Cruz in Woman on Top when she got the motion sickness (purple lips, puffy eyes, sweat) and I told him “I am feeling very ill, do you mind if I step out?”. I did and BARFed, barely making it into in the ladies room. LOL! He actually called me and offered me the job! (He probably felt bad for me, I didn’t accept it)

I’ve tripped, slid in the mud, slid on ice – these things have all happened many times and mostly in front of people. I have written love notes to a guy that I later found out had a girlfriend (from the girlfriend), I have asked out the same guy twice (in high school) and got rejected both times (take a hint sweetie!), I think I invented the “Do you like me circle ‘Yes’ or ‘No’” notes! I have a very high threshold for embarrassment.

More often than not telling a guy that I liked him has worked, especially as an adult – either leading to a relationship or at least a make-out session. You don't even have to say "I like you", just start a conversation and guys are panting in minutes. So I don’t understand when people don’t just tell their crush that they like them, or that they think they are cute or whatever. I’m not just being b*tchy about people online, I say this to my friends in real life too! If they have a crush I go through the same schpeil. We aren’t in high school, we are old enough to say what we want, blah. I really have a hard time understanding the “why nots” here. Especially because I am actually a pretty shy person even though my chart would suggest otherwise. I do have Moon square Venus (wide orb 6 deg) which suggests some disappointments in love so, I have experienced that and I am able to move on because of Moon trine Mars (0 degrees) and Mars in Gemini smack dab in the middle of the 5th (actions and words – both work well on the love front). That was also something I learned from my earthy parents, as well as my Aries-laden extended family – GO FOR WHAT YOU WANT! I do. Ya see, love isn’t really the problem I am having now. I frequent the boards because I am having problems with career. I can’t “go for what I want” if I don’t know what I want…that sucks…

posted August 15, 2009 05:30 PM            

T. Mars is conjunct my natal Mars right now so that could be why I feel like I need to get everything done, um, yesterday. Bleh.

Also…talking about my ex was weird enough, then Valus starts a thread called “Howl” and I think to myself, I hope it is about werewolves because if it is Ginsberg’s Howl, which was my ex’s favorite poem, that he bought me a copy of for my birthday, that I was just thinking about because of the story I wrote then I am going to flip! Sure enough, I’m with you in Rockland …