posted April 21, 2012 11:33 PM            

EVERYONE,

Look at this book,

Read through an applicable section, and I dare you to tell me that everything applies based on your placement.
These are the basics that people should know.
It is *positive* to share experiences, so let's keep that up as well.
Let's also cut it with the defensiveness when something doesn't apply,
*unless* it is said directly to you about yourself, and you consciously know it to be otherwise.
Then defend, if you feel the need, to set the other person straight re:your character based on your chart.

ALSO,
There is a good portion of that book that is available for free on books.google.com
(or at least was as of a few mos ago).
There are a few other books on correspondences, they would be good too.
Give yourself a helping hand here

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Edit to add some further comments on this issue

There --is something-- that cannot be accounted for by a quick study of this issue,
and that is the matter of individual perception.
Individual perception, I fervently believe, should not stand in the way of free speech.

This is the *ultimate gray area* in the discussion.

If we are to share our experiences honestly (on this admittedly very complex topic) then we run a common risk of them being perceived in a different manner than intended. The moment we have to censor our honest experience, with our honest perceptions attached, is the moment that our free speech is in peril.

This calls to mind the issue of one misinterpreting the experience of another (their perception). One's perception should never be misinterpreted as the perception of the majority, or even the minority. This is a statement that is at the core of my argument. It takes a few things to be able to avoid this type of erroneous conclusion. One of them is just simply being able to filter opinions and detach, not throwing one's ego into the discussion (refer to sand's comments on previous page for a comical take on this area). This subject really is vast, complex, and interesting enough on its own, without injecting one's insecurities into the mix. On some days with astrology topics this is not possible, owing to that big wild card of, "just having a bad day." Barring those "black cloud days," we should be welcoming experiences of all Lindaland members who wish to chime in on the topic if it relates to their experience with astrology, since that is the main focus of this forum, astrology topics that are more advanced. And we are here primarily to share and learn.

If, on a sensitive subject (and there is much gray area as to what actually qualifies a subject as sensitive) one is to comment then one should still proceed honestly and also --keep in mind-- that others may not have had the same experience. This goes back to individual perception, and also my core argument. A debate can ensue on the subject itself, and that is common. But to debate the experience of another, in other words to demand that they justify their experience, is uncalled-for. It then remains at the sole discretion of the person who made said post to answer to the questioner. This can be seen as a form of bullying because one's right to free speech is being called into question by another who did not care for their perception. This should never be the case when one is relaying personal experiences regarding a topic in astrology.

****Remember the primary reason that this forum exists:
To share our experience in advanced astrology topics and to learn.****

Now, what is the difference between bullying a justification out of one's perception, and merely asking for clarification? This is all in the tone in which the question is posed and all in how the individual reads the tone of the question. We're back to individual perception and this gray area. How can one justify one's experience? I'm going back to the core of my argument here, one's perception should never be misinterpreted as the perception of the majority, or even the minority. If one interprets a comment as speaking for all, then they are making an erroneous conclusion, which will beget misunderstandings (and possibly hurt feelings) on their part. Which is why it behooves them to either, 1) initiate a debate on the astrology topic at hand, or 2) stand back, appreciate their right to speak their truth, and comment, read, teach, and learn.

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And another,

I want to mention some key points here quickly,

1) This thread made no mention of any LL member. It's shining a light on an issue that has been around this forum for a while. And definitely before some of the newer LL members made their appearance.

2) If you had read my clarification, you would see that I encourage the sharing of experiences. And of course some will be subjective, sometimes those that involved our emotions for a time (for example a bad experience with people with a certain placement), or more objective, as in the research that we've done. These are both valid. It is up to --the reader-- to sort out what makes sense for them and what doesn't regarding their experience. They should also be able to filter out personal bias on an as-needed basis when taking in information. This takes more time to acquire for some, but it is possible. We have to do this every time we hear from the news media regarding any issue. This is a positive skill to have And LL is a good place to exercise that ability, especially when we speak of this subject which has many variables inherent in each placement/sign/house/aspect. Which is why I recommend owning or having access to a book on correspondences.

3) If you are going to take every astrological assertion made here as fact, then you are doing yourself a disservice. There are too many people here, with too many differing opinions, to be able to accept it all as "true and unquestioned at all times." This is crazy-making. Save yourself the trouble. I'm starting to reiterate my clarification from page 2 so I will end this point now.

4) And finally, if you did skip over my clarification on the issue, read this:
One's perception should never be misinterpreted as the perception of the majority, or even the minority.
I'll add in also, "one's experience."

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For fans of analogies
If you are Republican, would you take as solid and factual everything that CNN reports.
if you are Democrat, would you take as solid and factual everything that FoxNews reports.
If you have a brain, would you be more likely to respect the reporting of the BBC? [ A curveball ]

posted April 21, 2012 11:40 PM            

quote:

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....that there are various manifestations for every sign house aspect placement, what-have-you, in the chart.

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posted April 21, 2012 11:59 PM            

quote:

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Let's also cut it with the defensiveness when something doesn't apply,
*unless* it is said directly to you about yourself, and you consciously know it to be otherwise.

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It's actually pretty easy to talk about astrology without putting people on the defensive. Just use qualifiers a lot, like "sometimes" or "there's a tendency toward."

If you state astrological "facts" without those qualifiers, you can easily offend people, whether they respond to the comment or not...they still might be offended.

posted April 22, 2012 01:16 AM            

And when people dislike a celeb, this should even be more obvious LOL but.. IT'S NOT YOU!!

posted April 22, 2012 10:54 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Faith:
It's actually pretty easy to talk about astrology without putting people on the defensive. Just use qualifiers a lot, like "sometimes" or "there's a tendency toward."

If you state astrological "facts" without those qualifiers, you can easily offend people, whether they respond to the comment or not...they still might be offended.

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posted April 22, 2012 07:02 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Lonake:
Everybody,
for the record,
sand is in favor of smilies.

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I'm in favour of using GIFs, but hey...that's just me.

posted April 22, 2012 08:18 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Lonake:
Everybody,
for the record,
sand is in favor of smilies.
I don't know where exactly in the msg,
but somewhere, if you are replying to him,
he wants to see a smilie. Link provided above, no need for thanks.

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posted April 22, 2012 08:21 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by RedScorp:
I'm in favour of using GIFs, but hey...that's just me.

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posted April 22, 2012 08:28 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by sand:
I also wanted to address the tooting your own astrological horn without smileys! LOL! I mean yes we are all awesome here we know that right huh! But if u don't put smileys that's some serious tooting going on there man! I mean Whoaaa! People should tell you, not you tell us LOL! Kthxbye!

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posted April 22, 2012 08:32 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Lonake:
Let's keep in mind that there's no need for defensiveness if no one is commenting to you about your chart.

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Great Point, Lonake!

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Passion, Lust, Desire. Check out my journal

posted April 22, 2012 11:12 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Aquacheeka:
Exactly! For instance, you could avoid use of potentially offensive words or phrases such as sexually perverse, stalker, etc. I just thought that kind of stuff was common sense But what do I know? I'm Canadian! We're in the business of being polite

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Yeah, it's good to NOT make definitive statements using words like that.

If someone is commenting on an aspect that I have in my chart, they ARE commenting on part of my chart.

So it's on them to be tactful. If they'd rather make concrete statements about signs and aspects using strongly negative terminology, that will probably elicit a defensive reaction whether it is verbalized here or not.

So rather than encouraging us not to be defensive, or feel insulted when we've been insulted, I would have struck at the root of the problem: "Folks, try harder not to be offensive."

posted April 22, 2012 11:21 PM            

Those experiences are still valid, as stated prior, and are encouraged

posted April 22, 2012 11:22 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Lonake:
But more to the point, consider that different people have different experiences with an aspect,
whether that be by their own personal research or by something they've lived through with themselves, or another.

Those experiences are still valid, as stated prior, and are encouraged

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Passion, Lust, Desire. Check out my journal

posted April 22, 2012 11:24 PM            

Poster1: Mars in Ophiucus it beats out mars in cap, mars in scorpio, and mars in aries!!

OP: O RLY? Have you been with a mars in ophi? where is your mars?

Poster1: No I iz only bein with mars in aquarius. My n.Mars is in Ophiucus..

OP: So you are saying you are sessy?

Poster1: yesh..

OP: KTHXBYE!

posted April 22, 2012 11:26 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Ami Anne:
Great Point, Lonake!

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Thank you Ami

posted April 22, 2012 11:37 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Lonake:
But more to the point, consider that different people have different experiences with an aspect,
whether that be by their own personal research or by something they've lived through with themselves, or another.

Those experiences are still valid, as stated prior, and are encouraged

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Why is that more to the point?

If you are advocating kindness and TACT, and so am I, one point of view is not more to the point than the other.

You can relate your experiences while still being tactful. Most of the people here manage to do that just fine.

posted April 22, 2012 11:45 PM            

I love the free speech that we are allowed on this forum
and the fact that we can share our experiences freely