|
Author
|
Topic: Erm....
|
Ami Anne
Moderator Posts: 57030
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010
|
posted June 14, 2012 07:03 PM
  
quote:
Originally posted by Libreo:
Oh and another thing, he told me that he was talking about it with the boys at work, and their advice was to get my drunk first so that I'd be relaxed. I don't think he meant to reveal this, I think it slipped out. He's only just moved in and my kids adore him.
Man, was this the guy whose picture I saw on FB, a long time ago? Has he already moved in ? ------------------
Passion, Lust, Desire. Check out my journal
http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/
IP: Logged |
VenusDiSirius
Knowflake Posts: 5917
From:
Registered: Aug 2010
|
posted June 14, 2012 07:13 PM
EdtIP: Logged |
mercuranian
Knowflake Posts: 885
From: not here
Registered: Apr 2009
|
posted June 14, 2012 07:17 PM
its not so much about the "act" itself, as much as him trying to coerce and manipulate you and not respect your boundaries. im sure some people enjoy this form of sexual expression, but the fact that he doesn't respect your boundaries---NO BUENO!IP: Logged |
vickymadness
Knowflake Posts: 2025
From: Minnesota
Registered: Jan 2012
|
posted June 14, 2012 07:56 PM
Actually most studies proved that majority of women won't enjoy that and wouldn't want to try it again. Anyway, communication is the key, I know you already talked to him, but this time try to tell him how dangerous this is for you, and may cause you a serious damage. There are many natural positions to try that can provide the same amount of pleasure and maybe more. And it would be very selfish if he insisted.and by the way shouldn't you being uncomfortable with this act be enough to turn him off ?!
IP: Logged |
PixieJane
Moderator Posts: 5196
From: CA
Registered: Oct 2010
|
posted June 14, 2012 08:04 PM
His friends reveal a lot about him. To me saying to get you drunk to get you to do something you don't want to do sounds too much like just using a date rape drug on you (btw, a guy on a message board advised doing this to a man upset over still being a virgin and said it wasn't rape as long as "she didn't say no" and I think he was being serious, not a troll). I'd ask if he's at least trying to lubricate but I think I already know the answer to that. Get rid of him. If he just moved in and he's already doing this he's just going to get worse. And just to be clear it's not the act itself it's the fact he's so obsessed with doing this and apparently even considering (threatening?) to do it against your will. He's a menace to be kept locked out of your home and not to be allowed as a role model for children, IMO. When you throw him out be sure to remind him that since so many women love it that he'll have no problem finding someone more compatible to be with. IP: Logged |
Xodian
Knowflake Posts: 843
From: Canada
Registered: Apr 2009
|
posted June 14, 2012 08:07 PM
quote:
Originally posted by vickymadness:and by the way shouldn't you being uncomfortable with this act be enough to turn him off ?![/B]
It would certainly put me off. Libreo, when you said you didn't feel comfortable about it, that would have been the signal for him to stop pursuing the subject. That should have been it. Done! Never to be brought up again type of deal.
IP: Logged |
vickymadness
Knowflake Posts: 2025
From: Minnesota
Registered: Jan 2012
|
posted June 14, 2012 08:21 PM
quote:
I'd ask if he's at least trying to lubricate
Problem is even with lubricants, she'll still get some damages since the tissues are very delicate. Not mentioning that the risk of getting STDs is doubled here. I agree with the comments above; if he doesn't care about your health or preferences , then he's not worth it//
IP: Logged |
Libreo
Knowflake Posts: 1180
From: Australia
Registered: Sep 2011
|
posted June 14, 2012 08:24 PM
quote:
Originally posted by VenusDiSirius:
Omg,they sound like a rapey support group.
What it is with insisting with this? Some sort of absolute dominance? R U N A W A Y
I'm so very confused, and if it were another woman on here with the problem that I have I would be telling her to run, and as stupid as this sounds, I love this guy to BITS! The other side of him is absolutely beautiful, before he attempted it again last night, when we were talking, he said "I would never hurt you, I want to be with you forever, I would do anything for your kids, I love them so much and I would do anything for you". Then he said "it was just something I wanted to try because youv'e never done it before and I thought it would be special if your first time was with me, kind of like I'm taking your virginity, I thought it would mean something, and the fact that you haven't done it with anyone else means I've got something on all your exes" So yeah, a power trip. He wants to hurt me and cause me pain so that he's the king and gets the trophy. Taurus moon? Possessive? Idk what to think, so sweet on the one hand and then so scary on the other. I told him this morning "A guy I know told me once that he hated his ex so much that he did that to her, he said to me 'In the end that's how little I thought of her'", I was trying to make a point that I don't think of it as something 'special' that a loving couple share, but his response to this was....."Oh one of your ex boyfirends said this I suppose". Totally irrelevant, he didn't get my point, just wanted to know who said this.
IP: Logged |
Libreo
Knowflake Posts: 1180
From: Australia
Registered: Sep 2011
|
posted June 14, 2012 08:24 PM
Thankyou so much everyone for your support and advice, it's all being taken on board, I'm so glad I'm on this forum with all of you.IP: Logged |
Libreo
Knowflake Posts: 1180
From: Australia
Registered: Sep 2011
|
posted June 14, 2012 08:27 PM
quote:
Originally posted by DepTaurus:
funny you should mention the venus gemini and mars virgo combo because aren`t they in those signs right now.Libreo check if both Mars and Venus are conjunct his own Mars and Venus.
Can you tell me what it would mean if they were? What would it do to him?IP: Logged |
DepTaurus
Knowflake Posts: 2265
From: canada
Registered: Apr 2009
|
posted June 14, 2012 08:40 PM
b][/QUOTE]
Can you tell me what it would mean if they were? What would it do to him?[/B][/QUOTE] I mean it would enhance the possibility of sex coming up in his life of course,i also think it would enhance his natal positions more.I think it would enhance his drive and ego as well as how he shows love as well. And even worse both planets were retro this year in both signs so it`s kinda like taking one step back instead of moving forward. P.s he seems like he is a controlling person to me,wanting you too take it when you don`t want to and sulking like a b***h when you won`t put out.Did he ever come across like this in the time that you knew him prior to getting romantically involved. IP: Logged |
Libreo
Knowflake Posts: 1180
From: Australia
Registered: Sep 2011
|
posted June 14, 2012 08:46 PM
No never, often he wasn't even in the mood for anything, I just thought his Virgo Mars was coming out, I had heard somewhere that they can take it or leave it. He just seemed like an old fashioned Taurus (moon) who just wanted to settle down with someone and have a real relationship. He loves kids, wants kids and a mortgage with me, that kind of thing. Very sweet, very romantic, VERY affectionate, decent, honest, you know the real deal. I don't know who the hell this new guy is.IP: Logged |
DepTaurus
Knowflake Posts: 2265
From: canada
Registered: Apr 2009
|
posted June 14, 2012 08:48 PM
post his chart,have you got one of his.IP: Logged |
beloved
Knowflake Posts: 94
From:
Registered: Jun 2012
|
posted June 14, 2012 08:57 PM
I understand the hesitation to participate but I'd have to say this is a fairly common request from men in my experience. Maybe I just have too many male friends or something but my impression has been that this is something most of them hope to accomplish. lolIP: Logged |
Libreo
Knowflake Posts: 1180
From: Australia
Registered: Sep 2011
|
posted June 14, 2012 08:58 PM
I don't have his TOB, he tells me that he was born at 6.29pm on 11th June 1980 in Gosford Australia. But to be honest I think he has it wrong, he just doesn't have a Gemini moon. I believe 100% that he has a Taurus moon, and the moon was in Taurus right up until a few hours before 6.29pm. He really is very Taurean, I would bet everything I have on his moon being in Taurus.IP: Logged |
butterflyxoxxo
Knowflake Posts: 286
From: seattle
Registered: Jan 2012
|
posted June 14, 2012 09:20 PM
There is nothing weird or kinky about anal sex but what is kinky? Depends on who you ask. If you are not comfortable with it then he should not bring it up again. Although, he sounds like the type of guy who will find someone willing. IP: Logged |
Libreo
Knowflake Posts: 1180
From: Australia
Registered: Sep 2011
|
posted June 14, 2012 09:28 PM
Awesome. So he'll cheat, if he can't hurt me physically then my punishment is a broken heart. That's great. So happy to be in this position.
IP: Logged |
Yin
Knowflake Posts: 3409
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
|
posted June 14, 2012 10:43 PM
Libreo, no matter how much you love and adore this man, don't forget who comes first. YOU. How do YOU feel? What do YOU want?
Don't do things you're not comfortable with. You are the only person you need to answer to about this. There is a WHOLE world of experiences out there to be had. If he is interested in something different, it doesn't have to be something you don't want to do. You may be able to reach some sort of agreement to do something you BOTH want to do. Make sure he understands exactly how you feel about what he's asking of you. It's not up for discussion. You are not going to change your mind. He needs to know you won't be talked into it. IF he doesn't get it, then you'll know what you need to do. Wishing you the best of luck with this. I've been in a similar position before and I stood my ground. It is what it is. If a man can't accept WHO you are, he doesn't really love YOU but his own projections of you. IP: Logged |
Ami Anne
Moderator Posts: 57030
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010
|
posted June 14, 2012 10:49 PM
quote:
Originally posted by mercuranian:
its not so much about the "act" itself, as much as him trying to coerce and manipulate you and not respect your boundaries. im sure some people enjoy this form of sexual expression, but the fact that he doesn't respect your boundaries---NO BUENO!
------------------
Passion, Lust, Desire. Check out my journal
http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/
IP: Logged |
aquaguy91
Moderator Posts: 9860
From: Uranus
Registered: Jan 2012
|
posted June 14, 2012 11:18 PM
i have a taurus moon and i can admit to having a possessive streak, but i havent ever felt compelled to bum my girl because of it XDIP: Logged |
aquaguy91
Moderator Posts: 9860
From: Uranus
Registered: Jan 2012
|
posted June 14, 2012 11:39 PM
i would also like to add being a guy i have friends who have tried it and liked it and none of their reasons for liking it had anything to do with asserting dominance, it was all because of a certain word that starts with TIP: Logged |
butterflyxoxxo
Knowflake Posts: 286
From: seattle
Registered: Jan 2012
|
posted June 15, 2012 01:06 AM
quote:
Originally posted by aquaguy91:
i would also like to add being a guy i have friends who have tried it and liked it and none of their reasons for liking it had anything to do with asserting dominance, it was all because of a certain word that starts with T
The reason does not matter. Also all of this beating around the bush is annoying we are all adults here (if not get out). I just skimmed through the past posts but I get the feeling this guy is: A. Really does not get how serious you are about not being into it and how you will NEVER be B. Selfish.
All that being said depending on your reasoning, I would just try it ONCE with him. It doesnt even have to be succesful. But hell I can even give you pointers if you want.
Seems like you will either learn to love it, tolerate it, or he will learn to do without or it might be a deal breaker. IP: Logged |
butterflyxoxxo
Knowflake Posts: 286
From: seattle
Registered: Jan 2012
|
posted June 15, 2012 01:16 AM
quote:
Originally posted by vickymadness:
Problem is even with lubricants, she'll still get some damages since the tissues are very delicate. Not mentioning that the risk of getting STDs is doubled here. I agree with the comments above; if he doesn't care about your health or preferences , then he's not worth it//
Seriously, people its just Anal Sex. Yes, there are some needed precautions but its not the big bad wolf we are talking about. And STDs well are you monogamous? If unsure, use condoms.
IP: Logged |
butterflyxoxxo
Knowflake Posts: 286
From: seattle
Registered: Jan 2012
|
posted June 15, 2012 01:18 AM
quote:
Originally posted by Gem-Gurl:
I wouldnt do an*l. Its ... gross. When he asks you "Why dont girls like an*l s*x?" Just ask him why HE wouldnt like it. Bam, problem solved! Unless.... you dont suppose he would be into that? Guess you dont know what to expect anymore..... you need a hug. *hugsies*
This is very silly asking a man how he would feel. Mainly because a straight male is not used to getting things *inserted* inside him..thats more of a women's experience ie regular sex IP: Logged |
Gem-Gurl
Knowflake Posts: 2050
From: Los Angeles, CA
Registered: Mar 2012
|
posted June 15, 2012 01:27 AM
quote:
Originally posted by butterflyxoxxo:
This is very silly asking a man how he would feel. Mainly because a straight male is not used to getting things *inserted* inside him..thats more of a women's experience ie regular sex
We talking bout things gettin jammed up ass*s. Its all the same, either way. In my book anyway IP: Logged |
Lindaland
UBBFriend: Email This Page to Someone! 
