posted October 29, 2020 11:19 PM            

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Originally posted by Brenda_S:
It's not necessarily about being judged, nor about false bliss. It's more about the uncertainty of what it is that I want. Their persuasions clearly work and it messes with my brain and I never know where I'm at in all this. Which is why I think one needs to determine beforehand. Before being swayed. What you want and don't want.

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When I said being "judged" and "counterfeit bliss", I was actually referring to those in relationships. 😅 Anyway I agree that you need to first understand what YOU want, not what THEY want. From there you will have a clear mind how to approach such "friendships".

posted October 30, 2020 01:11 AM            

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Originally posted by GalacticCoreExplosion:
If only most women were like you Hikaru! Sane, balanced, centered, logical, emotionally secure. Conversely, it would be nice if most men were like you as well.

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I think a lot of women are. I wouldn’t be with someone, if I thought I couldn’t trust them.

Unfortunately, I’ve also been the woman that men have hit on, when they’re in a relationship. Not all of them, but it was a disturbing trend for a while, and I wondered why they thought I would ever do that. That’s why I never want to be around my brother-in-law. Although I don’t think he was all that attracted to me, I think he liked causing trouble. It was so weird to see my sister make every single excuse in the book for him, and choose to attack me instead. My mother once referred to him as a Svengali.

posted October 30, 2020 01:30 AM            

And if anyone really wants to see into their shadow more deeply and fully, then try an open relationship for a time, You'll learn a lot about your fears, insecurities, pent up emotions, etc. I certainly experienced quite a gamut.

That sucks that you have gone through that, especially with your BIL. I don't know what to say other than maybe best to avoid him as much is possible. Or, if he ever does anything like that again, kick or knee him in the nads. Doubt he would do again after that.

Kind of reminds me of our mutual good friend and her boyfriend a bit. They are not open, but for some reason, her boyfriend sometimes subtly and not so subtly hits on my partner, and she doesn't welcome or invite it. In fact, she has gently called him out on it in front of her, and to both of our surprise, she seems to just ignore or pass it over. Maybe it's just too uncomfortable for her to deal with directly. Or maybe she is just tolerant because she knows herself and her own shadow well. She is a Pisces Sun, Taurus/Aries cusp Rising, Virgo Moon and predominant Venus (and Venus in Aries). I don't know.

posted October 31, 2020 03:25 AM            

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Originally posted by GalacticCoreExplosion:
If only most women were like you Hikaru! Sane, balanced, centered, logical, emotionally secure. Conversely, it would be nice if most men were like you as well.

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posted October 31, 2020 03:39 AM            

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Originally posted by teasel:
It was so weird to see my sister make every single excuse in the book for him, and choose to attack me instead. My mother once referred to him as a Svengali.

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posted October 31, 2020 05:41 AM            

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Originally posted by Brenda_S:
And do sextiles/trines matter?

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Remember to use Hindi/Lahiri ayanamsha when you generate sidereal chart.

Aspects don't work the same way in vedic. All planets form opposite aspect and they aspect the whole house. In addition, some planets have special aspects. Jupiter/Rahu/Ketu form trines. Mars forms square and quincunx counting from the right. Saturn forms sextile to the right and square to the left. It can be confusing at first but you will slowly be familiar with it.

Then there are Nakshatras like Dumuzi has explained. The moon is the most important planet in the chart, followed by Sun and Rising... so for a start, study these three in your chart. Houses are important in vedic and it's a big topic on its own which is hard to explain here. There are also divisional charts where you go more in depth into various aspects of your life e.g. D9 Navamsa shows your married life or life after 30s & beyond and D7 shows career. It is also believed that past 34/35yo, negative influences in our charts become reduced as we mature.

Predictions are made based on planetary periods called 'Dashas' and transits.