posted April 17, 2011 04:00 PM            

I, personally, cannot understand how any person could have a child and not feel overwhelmingly responsible for him or her. Anyone whose heart is right will.

I also cannot understand the number of people who will separate a child from his other parent (i.e., take the kid and leave) for any reason other than abuse. Too often I have seen a child used as an instrument of retaliation. Also, I have too often seen a parent with a whole train of children, all conceived with different significant others, none of whom are still around -- and the parent with the children never intended it any other way. "Thanks for helping me make the kid I wanted. Now go away." This kind of behavior is equally abhorrent.

Now, as a side note, I have made no mention of gender yet in this post. Isn't it interesting, though, that you probably visualized a male as the subject of the first paragraph and visualized a female for the second? And what does that say about the realities of our current situation?

So. Yeah, f**k deadbeat dads.
And f**k ****** who'll take a kid from a good father, then ruin the father's life by bleeding him dry with child support (do you have any idea how much they take??), which also sets him up to become another unwilling participant in our country's criminal (in)justice system. (Whether he won't pay or can't pay, he's going to prison. And, gee, in this day and age, no one normally has financial difficulties, right?)

posted April 17, 2011 05:48 PM            

If you need to, whack one off. Sex could potentially bring a child into this world. We all know that. If youre not ready for those consequenses, don't do it.

That's a choice I make anyway. I don't want a baby, or to be on birth control, so I'm not risking anything and having sex.

I can hear them complaing now "But, it's not that easy" Get ahold of yourself and take control of your sexual energies.

If you havent and have screwed up or are at the point now of "been there, done that" and now you have a baby, the woman did you wrong, whatever? Deal with it the best way you know how. I hear so many excuses from deadbeat dads trying to blame that on the mother of the child. Enough.

posted April 17, 2011 06:02 PM            

quote:

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....T, and Pluto squared, I really don't like you two. Both of you have evil running through you, whether you realise this or not.

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Well then, youre Saintliness! Please, why don't you show us by example your Holiness and get real for a second and answer us with some honesty and depth about why you started this topic. Rather than tossing insults around?

posted April 17, 2011 06:08 PM            

Not happening with either of us.

So if you arent the one that has a kid to support, is it a friend of yours who has to pay child support and now you are upset because he cant come out to play with you anymore? He's too broke?

posted April 17, 2011 06:20 PM            

I'm lucky now because my son is almost old enough now to not need childcare (he will be 13 by next summer) but wow when they are young it can cost $500 - $1000 a month for childcare so a parent can work.

Kind of puts things into perspective.

Though, yeah, still paying $376 per month for a tutor and $80-$100 for trombone lessons and $165 per month for school lunches.

The $60-$100 a month his dad has been giving me seems pale by comparison.

posted April 17, 2011 06:29 PM            

I see balance in my arguments, including why the nasty option (use man as payment option) can be useful.

Did you find that in my replies?
Did you find personal examples in my replies, or can you not read, with being too school for a site that deals with algebra homework? Bit red faced now and wondering why you said all this when it is in my posts? What happened there, I wonder.

posted April 17, 2011 06:38 PM            

Coffee, I don't see balance OR any answers in your arguments. I'm also not having a "coolness" contest with you. I already won that one.

posted April 17, 2011 06:40 PM            

I don't ask for CS because my ex is a an alcoholic who used to turn up drunk and abusive to visits which I could have stopped right away but didn't, I always gave more than a second chance (some people need more), but he has no interest in being a supportive father so I cancelled pulling money out of his account once a month and the visits have stopped.

It would be different if he took his child on weekends and wanted to be a part of her life but by his actions he doesn't. He's a mess inside and has mega problems, so I couldn't be that cruel to him on top of what he's going through already. yeh he's punched me before, kicked me, threatened me, but for some reason I feel sorry for him and not vindictive. I could ask for back pay of so much money but that is out of the question. He has RELINQUISHED his rights and therefor I do not ask for a cent. There would be women out there who would still take his money.

Luckily the government provides a very generous tax benefit here and it does help to pay for my children. We are fortunate not to be struggling, but for woman in my position who does not have a husband earning a decent wage then I can understand if she felt tempted, but it's still a matter of right or wrong.

posted April 17, 2011 08:22 PM            

Good for you for taking the high road, Sun Child.

posted April 17, 2011 08:52 PM            

Men who complain about supporting a child after a relationship is over
Are really complaining about not getting any booty.

That is why they keep bringing up the new boyfriend.

get it?
child support = regular sex.
so whoever is getting sex, is who should be paying child support

posted April 17, 2011 10:32 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by T:
You saw what i wrote to you PS. Since I try to stay away from incitefulness, I'll edit...and back off.

Good for you for taking the high road, Sun Child.

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posted April 17, 2011 10:35 PM            

The part about the whole child support ruining every man that pays, is definitely skewed information. I thought I made it clear where I stood on the issue, early on.

A man can have his child support adjusted based upon his income. I believe if a man is an absentee parent, and does not have joint custody, he should pay child support.

What's the dealio? Freaking crazy people.

I agree with what RG said with a woman taking a child away from a good father... he made the distinction there. It was noted.