posted November 25, 2000 05:55 PM         

"Another characteristic of Twin relationships is that they're never quite "over"...how can they be? We have the choice of course to contact or not contact our Twin, but they keep popping up."

You hit right on the nail. It's like this for us, also.

I read somewhere that you do not always recongize your Twin Self unless you two are evolved to become compatible. What do you think? Also Twin Selves have no wish to harm each other. I may be sad, angry, etc. but never wish him harm. We'd resolve as quickly as possible which is a good thing. All I can do is wait and see while he's playing with his Free Will Tinker Toys. Or I will meet someone new who will teach me about new things. Who knows?

posted November 26, 2000 03:05 AM         

I have come to discover that whatever happens is for the best. Our Higher S-elves are always looking out for the us-of-us. We are never alone!

posted November 26, 2000 06:34 PM           

Mele, I don't think we consciously recognize our Twin until we've evolved enough to do so. I do think we always UNCONSCIOUSLY know our Twin many times in other lives so that we can work out all kinds of relationship issues. It's the romantic relationship that is the one that takes some work on so many levels. And like I've said, most of the time, it's the woman who has the job of "letting go" and the man who has more seeking and maturing to do. The Isis/Osiris legend is fascinating, and Twins follow this path. It's the most rewarding and hurtful relationship I've ever gone through, and I don't feel as though it's entirely over yet, and I can't wait to see what the next lifetime will bring!

I too, Mele, wonder if I'll meet someone else who I'll end up spending my life with who will bring other messages or lessons. It's sad to think about and wonderful at the same time. Right now, I can't envision being with anyone other than my Twin, and yet, I don't think we'll be together permanently in this lifetime. I've found that Time is a wonderful teacher and things have gotten easier to deal with as I've come to understand the nature of this relationship better and as time has gone by I feel more at peace with it all. I miss him so much sometimes I want to die, but I also want him to come to me of his own Free Will and I won't settle for anything less. We're getting closer and closer to this all the time, and if it takes a couple more lifetimes...oh well, at least it'll be awesome when it happens! (can't imagine him looking any better than he does now though, ha). Anyway, it's a hard one. You're obviously ready to deal with this this time around, and yes Randall, our Higher S-Elves absolutely look out for us, and I've found that timing may not always feel right, but it's always correct. I feel blessed by the Hell that I've gone through with my Twin. Odd, but true.

Donna, what I know about Robert and Linda came from someone who talked with Linda's friend Ruth. Robert wasn't such a nice guy, and yes, Linda was extremely difficult to live with. He MAY have left her for the Scorpio (he's married to her now and has been for years), or he may have left her just because he wanted out of the relationship- this I'm not sure of. When I inquired about the fact that Linda sites him as "editorial consultant" etc, in Star Signs, and sites him in Gooberz, these sitings were more because of his contribution to her life and learning, and not actually because he was physically present in her life and experience at that point. To my knowledge, he never came back after he left, and she pursued him for a long while. He wants nothing to do with her or anything about her, and lives very privately in Seattle. He wasn't very nice to her near the end, and I'll tell you, my image of him shattered beyond belief when I found a lot of this out. He wasn't so "wise" as Linda professed him to be, except in the way that his behavior prompted HER to think and channel and spiral. He was most definately a vehicle for her, like all Twins are. She had to do a lot of convincing to make him realize that he COULD be Bill. I believe he was, but HE wasn't so sure. Apparently, all he ever conceded to was that it was "possible".

Some things I wish I knew more about is the "higher karma" that Linda said was a part of her and Rober's experience,(something political I think) and the religion they started. Are there any followers of Mannu still?

If anyone knows, please fill us in!

posted November 27, 2000 11:09 PM         

Just one word of advice, please, don't ever settle just for the sake of settling because you feel it's the right thing to do. I did for a while. What a mess.

But, on a very happy note, I thought you all should know...I ran into my other half on the 24th. Who knows what will happen, it was the same old "touch my heart briefly, and then leave quickly" thing...I went to see his band play, and at the end of the show, I sat by the bar in the club, my heart really hurting, knowing that I knew the man on stage so well, but I'm in a crowd of hundreds...just no one special.

Suddenly, and I do mean suddenly, when I was planning to leave, and had made up my mind that I was going to go outside and cry, because I felt his presence, and I felt like he needed me...but I somehow couldn't see him...an angel, in the form of one of his best friends tapped me on my shoulder and said, "You're coming with me" and dragged me by my hand backstage past all of the bouncers and onlookers. When I walked into the room backstage alone, it was like a beehive, everyone was busy...members of the band, their families and friends, mingling and moving around. I felt my other half was on the other side of the crowd in front of me, to the left. I started blazing a trail, the sea of bodies in front of my parted, revealing my love sitting on a loveseat, by himself...all alone...looking very alone. At that moment, when I saw him, he looked up at me, and looked at me, and looked at me some more. My two friends who bought the ticket for me to the show and drove me there witnessed me sit on the arm of the loveseat next to him, they said that he looked so relieved...and he held out his hand, and I took hold of it, he looked up at my face, right into my eyes...not even smiling, in all seriousness he said, "It's so good to see you." We talked, quietly, and seriously for about five minutes, and then he said, "I want you to call me." I asked, "Are you sure?" He repeated, looking like he was an empty husk, like he was soul sick, "I want you to call me." I asked him when, he said slowly, "Anytime." I told him to get some rest, and to be well, and no matter how much it hurt me...I kissed him goodbye on the cheek, as he kissed my cheek, I let go of his hand and I walked away, not looking back. My friend told me later that night, "I just thought you should know, he was watching you from the moment you got up, until after you walked out the door. He needs you."

The question is...is he ready? I don't know. I'm a little scared. I felt like he was so sad inside, I just wanted to take him in my arms there, take him home and take care of him. It felt like I was visiting him in the hospital.

It's been 10 months since I saw him last, and I thank all of you for bringing this important subject up, because I think it indirectly helped me cross paths with him again at this point...but, Saturn is still chained around his leg, and Eight is still haunting me...no lasting happiness yet. But, man, did it feel good to look into his eyes again, and have him search mine and smile.

posted November 28, 2000 11:07 AM           

Gooberlily, Saturn and 8 haunt my relationship too. I'm a '26'- it's been a difficult but rewarding path for me so far, and I've really tried to learn my lessons.

I feel like Linda had SO MUCH more to tell us about these things. Obviously, we're meant to uncover our own "Twelfth Night Secrets"- the Isis/Osiris legend is inherent to Twinship, and it's so important in understanding what's going on. It's all fascinating as well as sad.

I really wonder what Robert thinks. He could even be a part of these sites without anyone knowing, or at least he could come and observe. She made him famous and such a spiritual subject. I'm sorry that his maturity level was in question. Oddly, my Twin is also a Leo born a day after Robert. Imagine how that all felt for me to realize!

posted November 28, 2000 11:06 PM         

I think Linda may have had a really hard time, because Robert wasn't showing on the outside what she knew he was on the inside. That's another hard thing we all go through, when we realize that our other half is a little screwed up in action and appearance to others, and at that point a lot of us have to just leave them be...that can be really hard sometimes. But all twin relationships should ideally be equal...it should never turn in to a Martyr/Savior type of relationship.

(Asking to the Uni-Verse): "Why does it have to be so hard!?"

Yes, I feel that there was so much more to be said at the end of Gooberz...and I think Linda knew that too. I have faith! I have faith, it will come.

Or to put it a little better, "When the readers are ready, the book will be published."

posted December 12, 2000 09:45 PM         

I looked through Gooberz and found page 707 which made me very sad.

She wrote:

a letter, a letter, a letter!

the postman is a messenger from the gods! yes! a messenger from the gods on Mt. Olympus

winged Mercury ... bearing love from you to me

your familiar handwriting
your dear funny left-handed dwarf scrawl was on he envelope

maybe I only dreamed you wrote, that night with your right hand

my heart skipped a beat
and glad tears sprang from my eyes
when I opened it, your letter

but ... all there was inside was my Goooober check for one thousand miracles
that's all there was

only my Gooober check - spurned
un-endorsed on the back, simply returned
with no message ... not a single word

Geez..this is so sad. How cruel ... for Robert to do that to Linda. Makes me wonder. Is it truly worth to keep on pursuing someone you love if he/she treats you badly. I agree with Gooberlily when she wrote: "But all twin relationships should ideally be equal...it should never turn in to a Martyr/Savior type of relationship."

I realize that it can be so hard, but not if they treat you badly. Your twins always need you. I know I've paid dues when it comes to my other half, but I could never ever be cruel to him. He NEVER HAD treated me badly until recently because he thinks this other woman whoever she is .... IS HIS SOULMATE. She's a married woman with a little girl. He and I were still happy and very loving..our lovemaking so spiritual..still, YET..he felt he HAD TO ... HAD TO tell me this. That she's "VERY SPECIAL TO ME. I FEEL COSMIC CONNECTED TO HER. WE ARE SOUL MATES" ... I was stunned and devastated...to me that was a cruel thing to say... Believe me..I am baffled. That happened a month ago. I already spoke out to him that it was probably empty and that things weren't always as they seem. I would not keep on pursing him. I would rather to withdraw and let him go. (he said it's platonic). He thinks he needs more? Maybe I should just let him eat all oatmeal he wants then later he will realize that I am "Special K", just the diet he needs! Of course, he still emails me now and then, but not as often as he used to and I don't see much of him on the net these days. We used to chat via Yahoo! Messager a lot.

posted December 12, 2000 10:28 PM         

Pesticide

The light in your eyes crumbles
Like sand castles in the tide
Pushed and pulled
By the surf of my soul
To rise and fall with each beat
Of the heart that we share.

Oh, deny me no longer
If I was stronger
Maybe, I could walk the seven seas
Without you by my side.

I am some miracle or tragedy to you,
And we both
Turn our faces
And our paths
From one another.
Lovers of some
Mystical belief in elusive happiness
Greater than that found
In the arms of the other.
But, I can not lie
Nor hide away any longer...
And your earthly body
For all its flaws
Is two steps from embracing,
One step from refusing
Our love.

And it's a shame, my dear
Oh, what a shame...
To know what I know
And know that
You do know,
But your mouth
Rejects some words,
Just like your ears
Reject some others...
Ah, the other half of your soul, it is I.

Please...

Stop making your eyes shift
On the inside!
Darting of your spirit
Like flaming ping-pong balls
Against the walls of your pupils!
It's maddening...

So maddening, that now you feel naked,
And want to hide your spirit...
- Or try to hide your spirit -
Whenever our eyes meet.

I'll give a warm
Mona Lisa smile
Next time I see
The both of you in the same room...
And delight in the fact
That I know all that I do...
And, one day after you smell,
See
And eat
The grass that looks greener...
You'll leave with a mouth
Full of chemicals and weeds
And, decide
To pop over to my side -
...The side free of pesticide.

- The End -

posted December 12, 2000 11:24 PM         

When I read your poem, I laughed so hard to tears!! You're soooo right. Hahahaha. I really love that poem. I cannot tell you how amazed I am. You're an who truly knows. Oh, thank you so much for making me feel so much better. I was fuming Can't help it. I've got Scorpio in Mars..I tend to like to push things over the cliff so that things could get better..maybe!

I am still laughing You're GREAT!! You ROCK!!

posted December 12, 2000 11:55 PM         

Mele ...it might be hard to think of this, but maybe "she" is one of the pieces of your soul, and thereby he can't resist her...Now, when you finally gather the scattered pieces of your soul unto you (should you choose to do so..
there are ways, one is choosing Immortality), if she is still alive another soul will enter her. He will "see" the difference and come back to his "whole" twin.

Or she might have a piece of his scattered soul and really be his soul mate...not his twin mate. When he has gained from that what he needed, again he will see a difference.

It might be why people who have been together a long while suddenly wake up and realize they no longer are attracted to or know the one they are with. It truly is another soul.

It takes time to work out the tangled puzzle and put all the pieces where they should be. I K-now it is hard, but unless you take charge of your soul in this lifetime...it might take another.

Hope this made sense...

posted December 13, 2000 12:08 PM         

Yes, your post does make sense to me. There is something I need to tell you: From what I gathered from him about her, he had a very special relationship with this woman's mother when he was younger. I don't know what kind of relationship, tho except that this dotter found journals, cards, letters, etc. after her mother's death.

I lived at boarding school for the deaf & blind which had very strict, restricted rules. He'd always come back to me. I remember one Tuesday night after doing homework, we girls went out to for snacks at "Dragon's Lair" snack bar on campus. There he was, leaning on his car..waiting for me. Looking so lost and lonely. I was really surprised to see him. I was 15, then and he was 18, an out of town college student (45 min. away). I am only putting things in time frame. I knew he was seeing other girls/women, but I also knew he always told everyone that I was "his girl". One day I was walking with my girlfriends from downtown toward the campus in St. Augustine, known as the US's oldest city, Old World Charm .... saw him in a car in the back seat with a girl. Guess what? He stopped the driver, ran to me & handed me a note. It said "Please don't hate me. I will come to see you soon.." ..something like that. When I was a senior, he stopped coming around. I truly missed him, didn't know where he was. Since I am deaf, we couldn't use phones to contact each other (back then it was HARD without any of high tech stuff we have today.) I learned that he had married.

BUT.... two months later, I learned that he got a divorce. He CAME BACK TO ME! But the problem was that I wasn't there. I was away out of town. He told them to tell me that he'd come next week. He NEVER DID..I graduated and left the State for College in D.C. Long story here.

posted December 14, 2000 01:48 AM         

Mele, you are not going to beLIeVE this, but I opened up to that exact same page a few days ago! I didn't post it because I couldn't duplicate her writing format on this thing, but it was very sad. Yet, even the sad parts of Gooberz are happy, because we laugh and cry with Linda all the way along. How strangely coincidental and synchronous that you and I both should be drawn to that same page!

------------------
"and the Mind will, through the Brain .. restore the memory
of the former Body Temple identity to the newly-discovered one
until finally, he or she will recall all which passed before

posted December 14, 2000 01:37 PM         

I almost didn't post that one, but I had to, because I knew it's what you're going through Mele, and it would make you chuckle

I think YIVY brought up a great point having to do with soul pieces, and I think it's something to really think about. I know I'm going to think about it for a while today.

One of the things that seems to happen a lot in these types of special relationships, and that is really a pain, is the fact that it seems like we're running around after our other half in circles...and they're running after us in circles...going in the opposite direction. So, we meet up with them briefly when our paths cross...and then we're off in circles again. It's very frustrating, and I know it's hard to deal with. Reading your story Mele, reminded me in a lot of ways of things I have gone through in my own special relationship. It sounds similar too, to what Linda may have gone through with Robert. Maybe there is a theme here ?!?

posted December 14, 2000 03:23 PM         

------------------
"and the Mind will, through the Brain .. restore the memory
of the former Body Temple identity to the newly-discovered one
until finally, he or she will recall all which passed before

posted December 14, 2000 05:55 PM         

------------------
"and the Mind will, through the Brain .. restore the memory
of the former Body Temple identity to the newly-discovered one
until finally, he or she will recall all which passed before

posted December 16, 2000 12:02 PM         

He always end it with "Hugs & Stuff" or "Hugs & More" That was our secret messages meaning Love/Sex

Now he ends it with just "Hugs, A."

This continues for over a month now.

So I asked my sister how I should end it differently. She and her Mate suggested that I end it with:

"Stuff & Hugs" is now, "Grope and Things" ... I want your body ... NOW!
Love, B. oxoxoxox

She says "....I think it's a nice "twist" and J. (her Mate) agrees ... he also says to add the "I want your body" ... cuz that makes it perfectly clear where YOU are coming from!!! If A. is NOT interested in ever being with you again ... this will reveal that ... J. also said, that if A. is confused as to whether or not he wants to be with you, ... this comment will also help him to make up his mind that he does want you! This is such a complex world, isn't it?"

I wrote to A. & ended it with "Hugs & Stuff" is now, "Grope and Things" ... I want your body ... NOW! Love, B. oxoxox

Yesterday he wrote back a nice letter about what was going on with him and asked me if I had a nice day, etc. blah ...

He ended it:

Hugs, A.

Just like when Linda received a reply from her Twin ... Unendorsed Check of Thousand Miracles

Oh, A.

I didn't know you decided to become my "just friend, platonic" friend. You never told me you no longer wanted to be my Intimate Friend.

We've been INTIMATE FRIENDS from the beginning ... for 35 Years.

See? 35 becomes 8. Saturn is haunting me now for some reason. I am a 17 person which is also 8. Last week at the party where a lady was selling candles and stuff. I pulled out a purple sarong and decided to buy it. Guess what? From piles & piles of sarongs in her box, she went in and pulled out one & held it to me. Off I went

It was a huge print of SATURN!! So I bought it ... I don't know why. To remind me of Wisdom, Patience, ..... and PAIN!!

Expect a Miracle

posted December 16, 2000 06:12 PM         

It sounds like he takes it for granted when he needs some emotional support...there you are. Let him sway in the breeze without a "net".
It might surprise him how much he does need you...

Maybe this is a time for him to discover you can function well without him around. Or perhaps he is letting you learn this. It takes two strong pillars to support an arch of TWIN-NESS, but both should K-Now the arch falls if one is not strong enough to hold up his/her end. One of you is teaching the other how to grow strong and tall.

------------------

posted December 17, 2000 04:05 PM         

------------------
"and the Mind will, through the Brain .. restore the memory
of the former Body Temple identity to the newly-discovered one
until finally, he or she will recall all which passed before

posted December 17, 2000 11:33 PM         

Saturn didn't like me rambling on in my letter...so he erased it and gave me a firm talking to in this message:

"We cannot process your posting, because you have exceeded the maximum number of images allowed per post. The current maximum is 8."