Author
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Topic: Infidelity aspects in synastry
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astro junkie unregistered
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posted April 22, 2004 11:07 AM
I don't give a rat's azz if I offend someone with my beliefs. Rule #1 for the 21st Century:: YOU CANNOT CONTROL WHAT OTHER PEOPLE THINK OF YOU.IP: Logged |
PlayfulPonderingFishMoon unregistered
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posted April 22, 2004 01:56 PM
See, that's interesting pixel, because I thought that when I prefaced that statement with the word, 'personally,' that everyone would get the point that I am only stating my own personal views on this whole topic. See, I honestly didn't mean to cause anyone any offense right there at all. I am just going to have to purchase a handbook if I intend to keep posting on message boards, I guess. I suppose that maybe I tend to make my posts into too much of an essay format sometimes, but I honestly, really, really do make a legitimate effort to be totally respectful whenever I post about something, so I don't know what I'm actually doing wrong though, lol. Now, here I go again, lol, no offense intended by me, but I think that you might have misunderstood what I was trying to say with that comment. I was NOT making any sort of total 'blanket statement' on your mental capacities in the least by what I said. I am not sure how you received that from my comments. I don't think that you're an overall 'lazy' or 'immature' person AT ALL. I was trying to keep those descriptions of 'lazy' and 'immature' to this ONE point of this discussion that we're having about this type of relationship, and I had NO intention whatsoever of trying to describe YOU as a PERSON with those words. I thought that was obvious from the way that I phrased my comments, but, I guess I wasn't clear enough about that, and I'm sorry. I thought that I sufficiently explained with my next comments after those, exactly why I thought that picking up with whomever and going off with them for sex, was kind of a lazy and immature way for ME, to handle my sexual desire if I say that I want a commitment with someone else all at the same time. I definitely do appreciate the time that you took to explain your take on these relationships, so please don't think that I don't appreciate the time that you took to write your response to me.
It was very informative in a way. From your comments, I get that some people feel that they can have 'love with no bounds' to quote you, and....
I get that some people, even if they feel they have love with their partner, can also go off and have sex with other people, and not feel that they are betraying the bond they have with another person while they do that.... since they have what you call 'love with no bounds' to make that circumstance work for them. You made your points perfectly clear on those things, and I respect that, which gives me some clues as to how these situations work for other people. But.... I did notice that.... I really didn't get any answer from you or anyone else as to WHY some people like this CAN HAVE that kind of a 'boundless' quality within their relationships and such. I mean, I totally get that that quality is there and that it is present within the relationship, but I still haven't truly gathered the reasons as to WHY it is there yet. Personally, I think that we might be able to substitute the word 'detachment' for that term that you refer to as 'boundless love,' unless I'm mistaken about that, but I think that we kind of can do that myself. I am not trying to make trouble or be insulting to anyone, but I can't help noticing what I see, and.... I see that if someone says that they love someone else, but is still able to have sexual relations with another person, even if it's just for 'knee knocking sex' lol.... then there HAS to be at least SOME form of 'detachment,' or something else like it, happening within that relationship, even if they ARE bonded in every other way between them except for the physical way. I mean, no matter what the level of some people's sexual desires, there are some people that 'take their commitment all the way' and some people, like this, that obviously don't.
And I think I got an answer from you as to HOW that occurs, because you describe it as some people having this ability to detach themselves from their partner on that physical level.
It sounds to me like the bond that has been created and built between two people has to STOP and CEASE at at least SOME point in order for those kinds of other liasons with other people to take place for them. Again, I am not stating any universal 'right or wrong' about that when it happens at all. In my opinion, I feel that I am just stating that you can't have TOTAL attachment to your partner, and then somehow be able to say, 'let's go have sex with other people' all at the exact same time. Some part of that couple has to be able to remain fairly detached about all these acts with other people, which you confirmed for me in your post with your words about boundless love being the thing that allows that to happen between you, I guess. But, what I haven't been able to get at, and what I think I was honestly, REALLY hoping to get at here, because I am such a probing person, was the WHY about how that quality happens within a person, or within a relationship. Is it a fear of being totally attached to someone else which makes some people choose to stay in such an obvious state of detachment.... or is it just because some people have this inability to become that attached to another person just by their own inherent personal nature or whatever? Hmmm.... that's what I REALLY want to know, I think, lol. I suppose that I might have to accept that I may just not be able to find my answers out about that question through this thread though. Also, I couldn't help noticing another thing as well....
While I heard an explanation as to the motivations of why someone might seek out an open relationship so as to be able to satisfy whatever their sexual needs might be at whatever time etc.... I STILL realize that I NEVER really received any explanation as to HOW this agreement between the two main people of the relationship actually works to SERVE THEIR GROWTH with one another as a COUPLE though. My original question was.... "What do you get out of a relationship" WITH YOUR PARTNER and yourself where you each have these open ended agreements to sleep with other people? I understand that what you get is the option to have sex with other people so that your sexual frustration doesn't build up to some level that you can't handle, I guess, lol, and in a certain kind of way.... that arrangement does serve each INDIVIDUAL person of the relationship, because it does allow them that sexual outlet etc.... but.... that still didn't tell me how the two people going off with the other people to have sex really served their interaction WITH EACH OTHER as a COUPLE though. I mean, personally, I still don't see how turning to others outside of the relationship works to the benefit of anything else but to only the individuals involved in a relationship. I can't see where it works to build and sustain anything deep within their 'coupledom' with each other, which seems to me to be an entity which can't be ignored since.... as we know from Composite charts around here, there are three entities within a relationship.... those being the first person, the second person, and then of course, the couple that is formed between the two partners as well. How going outside of your own selves through engaging in other activities builds that third entity of the couple up to a level of all that it could be does still escape me, I admit. But, personally, I don't think that I am going to get my answer to that question answered either, I guess, so I just won't know. Like I've said, commiting to your loved one with your body certainly isn't the only way that you can express love and passion to your loved one....
but I, personally, do feel that it is one of the most IMPORTANT ways that you can express your love and passion for them though. To me, that is a basic, fundamental expression of the love, passion, honor, reverence, respect and regard which I and my partner have for one another and for what we have committed to building with one another.
It's just an expression of what I consider to be our true, committed love for one another, since I guess to me, the bottom line is that 'love equals commitment.' I was thinking about that lately, how do I like to be shown that someone loves me, and.... while some women like to be shown through being taken out on special dates, or though being gifted with presents like flowers or jewelry, or through having poetry read to them or written for them, or through being helped out around the house, or through any of the myriad ways that it could be expressed to them.... I think that the most important way that I want it to be shown to me is through someone's sentiment of making the commitment of only having certain types of intimacy with me, and only me. So, to me, that doesn't just include us only making the commitment to being confidantes with one another about our deepest personal secrets or something, nor does it include us only making the commitment to the two of us being the only ones whom we turn to at the end of the day to discuss our greatest triumphs or strongest disappointments at all, but.... it also includes the two of us making the commitment to be the only ones whom we share the intimacy of our bodies with as well. IE.... the expression of my own personal belief that 'love equals commitment.' If other people are happy with their lives, then so be it, it's certainly none of my business. I was just trying to get to the root of things, as usual, but I guess maybe I don't have to understand everything about everything in this world. I was just curious to know what the motivations behind a relationship like that were for some people, that's all. There really wasn't any form of judgement inherent in my questions and comments, even if they unintentionally came off as sounding as if there were a judgemental quality within them. So, Love And Peace To Everyone!
Whether You All Believe That I Mean That Or Not, Lol!
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lioneye68 unregistered
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posted April 22, 2004 02:07 PM
I do not share, nor would I feel good about a partner who was willing to share me. I want him to be possessive. It means he cherishes me, and as a Leo, I need that. For me, sex is an intimate bonding on an insanely intense level... ALL the chakras should be involved for maximum enjoyment.Never was one for one-night-stands or flingee thingees. But that's just me. Sometimes I WISH I could see it from a more light-hearted p o v, because then I wouldn't dread being single so much. IP: Logged |
sthenri unregistered
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posted April 22, 2004 02:40 PM
There are people who have very high sex drives, who are simply insane with frustration. Look at Venus square Mars, or opposite Mars, these people are usually better with a partner all the time, or need a sexual outlet. Especially if the Venus is in Capricorn, and Mars in Aries.Sex is important to some people, very important. Especially to men. Other than that, yes I believe you can be attached to a partner and share, in this life we are taught certain lessons, one is letting go. If you have been taught letting go is the best option for staying in a relationship, then you will let go emotionally. If your parents were in an open marriage like mine, then you may think differently. My father was an Aqua, and mother a Scorpio, and even so, she had a moon in pisces and ascendant in gemini. It can happen and so I do feel there is too much danger in wrapping your entire existence around someone because I do not see happy couples that way. It's all in your perspective. My Venus in Aries hates to live with someone and so I do find monogamy easy. But I do want it. And so it's always a struggle for the best fit. I can share, but I would like to see others share me with myself! Natasha Taurus Gemini Mercury/7th Uranus Libra/10th Cancer Moon/8th IP: Logged |
pixelpixie Newflake Posts: 8 From: ON Canada Registered: Apr 2009
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posted April 22, 2004 02:59 PM
PPFM~ You said you don't understand certain aspects of this. But really, you are not trying to....Maybe you do not have the capacity to. Bananas and apples, water and fire... different, but necessary differences. I agree that relationships have their own identity.. hence the composite. But two individuals make up a relationship. Their combined personalities. Maybe your level of love, or what you define as complete and utter devotion, is not everyone's. (maybe.. ha ha, OBVIOUSLY!!) When I got married, it did not include absolute forthright utterance. He does not need to know every facet of every sinew of every thought-process in my body and mind. Just as I don't expect to know his. It is better with a little mystery. Who really knows themselves wholly, anyway. People can love as deeply without limits. Who am I , who are you, to define what is true to a person. Maybe the quest for complete assimilation is not a quality all hold dear in a relationship... after all, cells change constantly.. Maybe My love will change tomorrow. In the meantime, People will always be different. I don't understand racism, for instance ( I AM NOT comparing your high minded views on love to racism!!! It is an example.....) No matter how much someone could defend and explain their views, no matter how much they may not jive with my own, I will never understand how someone can be racist. I Just Do Not Understand. I don't try to, as I can't. I never will. I am not being defensive over your views. I think, as I have said many times, they are awesome, and very spiritually sound. My original point is that... they are not everyone's, and though right for you, are not right for everyone. Cherish your feelings, and make them work in the context of your life and love, but please don't belittle my sacredly held feelings just because you don't understand them. It doesn't make yours any better or bigger, just different.****You don't know how much I want to jump all over the 'offensive' bandwagon, but out of respect, I have only hinted at it here. IP: Logged |
trillian Newflake Posts: 0 From: Registered: Apr 2009
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posted April 22, 2004 03:10 PM
"Detached" and "Boundless" are not synonymous. By labeling a choice as 'detached,' you are judging, somewhat derogatorily, too, it would seem.PPFM, as to the why, I personally don't feel the need to defend my choices, nor do I think you will, at this time, understand my language, no matter what I say. You seem to think that the only way to love, or bond, is your way. That the only righteous, true love is the type you idealize.
I disagree. My capacity to love is infinite, and indeed, boundless. It is never detached. That particular label is your judgement, from the outside, looking in at a place you disapprove of. You are very set in your beliefs. So be it. We're One, but we're not the Same. Like gloria said, you can't change other people. You can only change your perspective. Make Love, Not War. 
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pixelpixie Newflake Posts: 8 From: ON Canada Registered: Apr 2009
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posted April 22, 2004 03:18 PM
 Yeah, what Trillian said.  And I love you too.  IP: Logged |
pidaua Knowflake Posts: 67 From: Back in AZ with Bear the Leo Registered: Apr 2009
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posted April 22, 2004 03:19 PM
PPFM, I understand you completely. I feel the same exact way regarding sexual / soul / body union. It is why I do not share myself easily, because when I do decide to make a bond with someone I want it to be all encompassing.
Personally (and I use the word in the same way as PPFM - meaning from my perspective) I can love many - meaning friends, aquaintenances, but I don't give myself over. To me, sex is not an itch to scratch - unless it is to be scratched by the one that I have given myself to. If I am looking outside of the relationship - then it is because I am not satisfied and therefore it is not fair for me or my mate to be in an "Intimate relationship". Maybe it is Mars in Pisces that compels me to give all - to surrender completely - when I have made that bond. My Sag Sun / Venus are not in conflict with that, mainly because my Sign wants to make sure it is real - if it is going to make me stop my independent ways. I love sex - sexual unions and I find it is extremely necessary if I am going to be in an intimate relationship - but it has to be exclusive or else I am not really giving myself to him and he is not getting a fair shake. I would feel the same if they wanted to be with another - it would push me to leave. I can also go long periods without sex and not feel like I am missing out. I would rather be celebate and wait for the right man - the one whose soul will merge with mine, instead of just jumping in for the sake of it. If someone else is fine with open relationships - well more power to ya..as long as you can handle it then great - but for me I feel as PPFM does - I don't understand or comprehend how being with someone outside of your relationship can strengthen an union. (ahhh, the fire in me is just too self centered for that ) IP: Logged |
trillian Newflake Posts: 0 From: Registered: Apr 2009
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posted April 22, 2004 03:34 PM
Ah, but Pid, like you, I too am predominantly fire, with a Mars in Pisces.  Relationships work or don't work. That's all. I'm not opposed to monogamy, and I've never said anything to the contrary. In fact,one day I might choose such a relationship. I certainly have in the past. But I've also chosen open ones. You know, like Natasha said, people are just plain different. We come to an astrology forum to learn about and cherish those differences, and hopefully, find more tolerance in our hearts. How can we possibly expect a Gemini to fit into the same box as a Scorpio (the rest of the natal horoscope notwithstanding)? How does the Gemini say to the Scorpio: "Well, I see what you are, and I already know I don't like it because it's not the way I am, but I want you to explain to me why you are what you are anyway?" IP: Logged |
pidaua Knowflake Posts: 67 From: Back in AZ with Bear the Leo Registered: Apr 2009
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posted April 22, 2004 03:43 PM
I hear ya Trillian I am just too...ummm...well self centered to enjoy it. Whether it's fire...(and that doesn't seem so since you are a fire woman too) maybe it's that Pluto rising in my chart - either way - for me it's all or nothing and I am cool with either one and if I am with someone that choses to be open against my wishes then they can hit the road..  But...and there is a big but..I am also not going to pigeon hole myself into a commitment unless I am sure. I will go out with other men or even make out with them...BUT, not if I am in a relationship that has a - and this is the kicker - strict exclusive to it. Meaning, unless we have both decided that it's a commitment - then I can come and go as I please and go out with whom ever I decide...not that it would make me happy if they did..LOL....I am a walking contradiction at times. Like right now, I decided to take a break from Mr. Leo - so we are no longer exclusive. I needed to see the world through the eyes of a single gal again..it seemed that my marriage ended and I fell into Mr. Leo. Never in my life had I gone from one relationship to another - so it freaked me out. If he dates someone else - it would really break my heart - but I can't stop it. If I date someone else - I most likely won't tell him but if I start to get serious with another - then I will have to let Mr. Leo know there is no future - that is only fair.
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pixelpixie Newflake Posts: 8 From: ON Canada Registered: Apr 2009
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posted April 22, 2004 03:44 PM
I am curious about the astology aspects of these views as well. We are all passionate and strong.... I have Uranus conjunct my Sun and Mars ( and Node) in my fourth house, in Scorpio.I wonder if Uranus has anything to do with this. ( on a side note.. that statement spoken, sounds funnier than it does written....) *BTW~ I have six fires in my chart* IP: Logged |
pidaua Knowflake Posts: 67 From: Back in AZ with Bear the Leo Registered: Apr 2009
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posted April 22, 2004 03:48 PM
you said...URANUS...hee hee.. SorryI have Uranus in the first house along with Pluto conjunct my Ascendant. Sun / Merc in 4th house and Moon in the 7th opposing Uranus and squaring n. Merc.  I also have Saturn in the 8th. Baa haaa haa...(evil laugh) Ahhhhaaaaa!!!!  'Zat is vhy she is not into...open relationzhips..' says Freud.....I like my Saturn there....it makes me happy and kind of helps harness this crazy Saggie LMAO IP: Logged |
trillian Newflake Posts: 0 From: Registered: Apr 2009
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posted April 22, 2004 03:52 PM
Pid...I too have Pluto rising, conjunct my Leo Asc. We have some strong natal similarities. And yet,we are obviously very different too. My astrology teacher always said Saggies will surprise you with some of their conservative ways (not criticizing conservatism! Just doing a little compare/contrast)---look at what a conservative state PA is, and it's a Saggie. Believe it or not, I have a conservative streak here and there. 
And yes--if partners agree to an exclusive relationship, then it should remain exclusive. If one partner changes and decides s/he needs and will pursue other lovers, then the right thing to do is to discuss it, and allow the other a choice whether or not to remain in a changing relationship. Yeah pixel, we certainly are a passionate bunch, aren't we?   IP: Logged |
lioneye68 unregistered
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posted April 22, 2004 03:53 PM
I think if I were to allow an open relationship, to me, it would feel like I was saying "I'll take you anyway I can get you, just don't abandon me."And if I were to insist on being allowed an open relationship, what I'd really be saying is "I'm not done shopping yet, but you can stay in my cart for the time being, if you want" Both are about self respect, or respect for others...in MY world, that is...I know that we all love in our own individual ways. Some love in a more universal way, while others love in a more focussed way.... Wide, but not Deep -VS- Deep, but not Wide. Both are fine, as long as you don't feel crappy at the end of the day. (or night) My view is probably the result of Venus trine Saturn (tradition, structure) & Venus square Neptune (ridiculously high ideals?) both aspects have really tight orbs. IP: Logged |
trillian Newflake Posts: 0 From: Registered: Apr 2009
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posted April 22, 2004 03:55 PM
Oh and pid, my Uranus is in the 12th, but it too conjuncts the Leo Asc...oooOOoooOoooo  And Saturn falls in my 5th, along with my moon and jupiter...all in Cappy.
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astro junkie unregistered
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posted April 22, 2004 03:58 PM
Lioneye -I too have the need to feel like I'm a man's "possession", in that snuggly secure way, but probably don't have enough physical, emotional or mental energy to make it as intense as you. Remember, I only have Singleton fire (Uranus in Leo). And although I have a lot of water in my chart, I DO NOT fair well with watery types AT ALL. So my Libra Sun & Venus in Virgo does contribute a certain degree of detachment, but I still HAVE to feel like I am a treasure to my loves. (And BTW - I'm not the type who uses other people sexually in order to satisfy my main lover's need. I don't do anything unless my heart is completely into it. So you girls who say they've been with another girl "once in college", you have NO idea...) As you know, I've seen the very dark side of being possessive when it's done compulsively and/or obsessively, and that's where I draw the line. Or if I get grilled every day about my activities. Or WORSE, if he/she doubts my honesty. Then the trust is gone, and that snuggly secure feeling is no more. As for sharing, I'm not completely against my lover feeling that entitlement with someone else. If the relationship becomes serious, I will talk to him/her about my bisexuality and work something out. THEY may be bisexual too, as many if not most of my lovers have been. But again, it's not like swinging from chandeliers, or what you see in some cheesy soap opera or movie. It may not even be anywhere NEAR sharing frequently. Maybe once or twice a year. In fact, if you haven't been in a truly loving relationship with more than one person, you cannot possibly know what it is like, and your opinion carries NO credibility with me whatsoever. You're just projecting your own sense melodrama. "...until you've walked in another man's shoes..." But it's still fun as HELLL to observe someone wring their brain out trying to figure it all out... FUN AS HELLL... ------------------ it's better to light a candle than curse the darkness... IP: Logged |
trillian Newflake Posts: 0 From: Registered: Apr 2009
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posted April 22, 2004 04:06 PM
I'm so glad I'm not the only one having fun in this thread.   IP: Logged |
lioneye68 unregistered
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posted April 22, 2004 04:09 PM
Fair enough, Gloria.I'm talking from a heterosexual point of view. Your situation is a little different, in that a man can't meet your needs as a woman lover could, and vise versa. Unless you find yourself a hermaphadite, that is. I'm not judging you, or anyone else. Offer me the same respect, would ya? IP: Logged |
pixelpixie Newflake Posts: 8 From: ON Canada Registered: Apr 2009
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posted April 22, 2004 04:10 PM
Gloria, you make me giggle.IP: Logged |
pidaua Knowflake Posts: 67 From: Back in AZ with Bear the Leo Registered: Apr 2009
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posted April 22, 2004 04:19 PM
I have never eaten a $hit sandwich either and I am not going to taste it just so I know what it is like....LOL...sorry - that just made me laugh.  No one is trying to get inside of your head Gloria or figure you out. To each his / her own. I don't have to have a threeway to know I don't want to do it... I don't have to have two lovers at the same time to know I don't want that lifestyle. What is wrong with that? I guess you must be feeling attacked - and I hope it's not from me. For all I care you could be a trisexual that has an ongoing relationship with a man, woman and an inanimate object- that also likes orgies and fingerpainting. 
LOL...it's cool -but I don't have to do it to know I don't want to participate right?
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lioneye68 unregistered
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posted April 22, 2004 04:38 PM
...good analogy, Pid...gross, but good.  IP: Logged |
PlayfulPonderingFishMoon unregistered
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posted April 22, 2004 06:35 PM
pixelpixie and trillian, Again, I am going to have to just get a handbook for this place, and figure out how I am supposed to express my opinion around here or something, lol.
Through most of my lines, I always use the word, 'personally,' like over and over and over again. I post like this on other message boards, and people don't take it so personally when I do. In other places, we all agree to have different beliefs, for sure, but.... that doesn't stop us from debating and dissecting and explaining and analyzing them to each other etc.... What pixel sees as me belittling her personal feelings, I only see as me analyzing her statements on an apparently controversial social issue instead. For God sakes, that's what I do. I gather information, research it, study it, analyze it, and then write my opinion on it all afterwards, lol. When I said that I hadn't received an answer to my question, I wasn't trying to be like, catty, or something with that comment, I was merely stating the facts as I myself personally saw them, which is what I do everyday, lol. I just don't think that some people are totally understanding that I was kind of like, conducting an investigation into a certain subject, that subject being open relationships, and then thinking about that subject outloud during my posts. I do that all the time on other boards, and I don't usually have so much of a problem with people understanding about it this way like I have had about it here. For the final time, I get that everyone has their own definition of love. I get that everyone defines bond and relationship in their own way.
Obviously, there are some people out there that don't want a commitment as I MYSELF, PERSONALLY, define one to be in MY own life, which FOR ME, is one in which people make a promise to show their love through monogamy.
I hope everybody understands that the reason that things are in Caps sometimes is to make the point that I am only stating MY own opinion here, because I am not trying to speak for anyone else at all, that's the point, you know.
As for the boundless vs. detachment comparison, if it sounded like I was being judgemental with that comparison, again, I didn't mean to sound that way.
I merely saw that as me being analytical about the comparison, and I'm sorry, but I can't offer anyone else's analysis about ANY MATTER, which obviously includes this one, except my own analysis, lol. But my objective isn't to insult anyone by my going over things in this manner at all, it's just to turn things over so I can figure out what is really going on in a situation all of the time. I can't help doing that, it's what I do. As for who knows themselves all that well, pixelpixie, yes, I am very into analyzing my own motivations about doing things in my own life as well.
I have to look within to find out what makes me tick, it is where I get the inspiration to write my material from, and I write more than critical essays about things, I write poetry and such etc.... as well. I wasn't trying to get anyone to explain their philosophies about the boundless so that I could diss them, I merely wanted to understand what their philosophies were inside and out, that's all. Sorry that it was all so misunderstood here.
As for MY own PERSONAL take on the boundless vs. detached, what I meant by that is that while the love people may give out from their boundless capacity may be strong and passionate and caring etc...., to ME it also still seemed like what I called detached as well, since from it's description, it also sounded like it wasn't so much 'attached' or 'anchored' or 'stuck' to any ONE person while it was shone on people either though.
I mean, on some level, what others call one thing, I PERSONALLY can't help calling some form of detachment in some way, since that boundless love doesn't feel grounded and connected in one direction enough FOR ME. It feels like it's very floaty and probably able to love a lot of things all at once, but well, it loves in a way that TO ME is still, just sort of....detached.... on a personal level when it's pointed and directed towards people, since it doesn't sound like it hooks on and connects to the object of it's desire in the way that I would PERSONALLY like love to be in MY OWN life. To me, I think that someone in this situation has to have a somewhat detached experience about their lover's body in order for them to be able to say.... "Sure, let him go off for awhile, because it's just sex, not love." But, I can't do that. I can't be so detached about what a person I love does in that way. I would feel too ATTACHED to them, body, mind, heart, and Soul, I guess. But, all of this is certainly really not worth talking about anymore. I see things one way, and other people see things their way, and if they're happy, then they're happy about it, and that's it.
Personally, for me, I just hope that I don't fall in love with a guy who wants an open relationship at all. ( No, I am not in a commited relationship right now. For various reasons, it is not the right time for that right now. ) TO ME, for a man to say, "I love you, but I want to sleep with other people too," would just be so devastating to hear. Not only would I feel deeply insulted, but I would also feel so deeply hurt by it too, that I cannot tell you. I, ME, PERSONALLY, would take it like "he doesn't really want to be committed to me, even though he says he loves me." But, I respect that other people would hear an entirely different message in those words, because they have an entirely different experience of what a commitment is like in their own lives, and while I don't seek THAT definition of commitment out for my own life, I really do respect that some people seek it out for their lives, if that's what they feel is going to make them happy, I guess.
lioneye and pidaua,
Thanks so much for just posting in with your thoughts. I enjoyed reading them very much! As for my astro info.... I am Sun in Aqua, 10th House Moon in Pisces, 11th House ( that House placement is supposed to help me get along with women, but I am not sure it's working all that well this week, lol ) Merc in Aqua, 10th-11th House Cusp Venus in Capricorn, 10th House Mars in Sag, 8th House ( The 8th is so me, with it's strength for investigating. And then the Sag placement wants to speak about the philosophies I've come to from my investigations afterwards, I guess, lol ) I actually have a lot of Uranus Trines and Sextiles to my personal planets in my chart too, which, in addition to my other Aqua placements, I personally think is significant in my views about a lot of things, including this subject, since I do feel that many people are swinging in the pendulum and entering a phase where the casual sex might be going more out of style again, and Uranus is the sign of the future and it's trends.
Ok, again, I am sorry for the misunderstandings between us.
After all of this, I can sort of grasp some of what I think makes these relationships work, which helps me to understand some things better than I did, even though I know that it is not the kind of relationship that I want for my own life, since in the end, I am obviously just an all or nothing type of person about it all, I guess, lol.
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posted April 22, 2004 07:03 PM
quote: How can we possibly expect a Gemini to fit into the same box as a Scorpio (the rest of the natal horoscope notwithstanding)? How does the Gemini say to the Scorpio: "Well, I see what you are, and I already know I don't like it because it's not the way I am, but I want you to explain to me why you are what you are anyway?"
Cause we Gems want to understand everything come hell or high water! HAHAHA Pidaua - I forget your dob - We really have simillar things in our charts!
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trillian Newflake Posts: 0 From: Registered: Apr 2009
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posted April 22, 2004 07:12 PM
Duality, the question was meant to be ironic, the phrasing negates understanding.I love Gems, one of the greatest loves of my life is a triple Gem. PPFM. No harm no fowl. We just speak a different language. I realized that I wrote 'fowl' instead of 'foul,' but I'm gonna leave it 'cause chickens are cool.  IP: Logged |
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posted April 22, 2004 07:34 PM
trillian, I only have Gems as great friends (men and women) but I am not attracted to Gem men in the least!!! I don't think I could take it (l have Sun, Mars, Merc and Venus conjunct in Gem) My greatest love was a fish (l have a fishy Moon) and others have been Rams. IP: Logged | |