posted May 19, 2008 10:51 PM         

You see, it's different when you're not supposed to love the person you do. It's different when you have to keep it hidden like it's the crime of the century. It's different when you can't have them. Ever.

I sound like a broken record, but i need you (all) to know that i'm not feeling this for him because he's cute, or because he pays attention to me, or because he's a great catch...

It's not like that. At all.

I don't need someone to make me feel better about myself. It's not like i'm asking him to save me from myself... i don't think. I just... blah.. just nevermind. I don't know how to make it evident that i don't just want in his pants, i just.. want to linger in his presence for as long as i possibly can.

I sound like a stalker... -_-

posted May 23, 2008 01:11 PM         

I told him back in March that i "was" in love with him a little while ago. What a lie that was.

Today i told him that I resent letting him know "how important you are to me". "You mean so much more to me than i will ever mean to you. When i leave here, and our relationship ends, my heart will break. But it won't do that to you. And i understand, i understand that you can't make yourself feel something that you don't, and you can't make yourself NOT feel something you do and... God, this isn't coming out right. I'm not making any sense. Just... **** , just forget it. Just.. forget it." I exited.

Now mind you, i didn't look at him at all when i said this. However, he did jolt and gasp when i said the heart breaking part.

So... yes...

posted May 25, 2008 11:00 PM         

I know i'm passionate, and dramatic, but some might not view that in such a positive light.

He didn't kiss me. I walked out immediately after i said it. Now i regret it. Now i think that i've made such a fool out of myself that i'll never be able to forgive my emotional outburst.

posted May 26, 2008 12:12 AM         

I was born to a 17 year old girl and a 30 year old man in San Francisco,California where they met. My mother ended up marrying a guy 25 years older than her too.

The woman that I love is 12 years younger than me. She was 23 years old when I met her,and we got romantically involved unexpectedly. It wasn't something that we planned. I met her in an astrology chatroom,and I gave her reading. We started off as just friends. It ended up being more than that. We were both attracted to each other from the start too.

So I am the last person to judge about age difference. I feel that it's best to reach adult age before you get involved with an older man. Statutory rape is a crime. I also feel that you shouldn't get involved with a married man. Love triangles suck.

It was different circumstances for my mom because she was a teenage runaway who met my father when she was 15 1/2.

btw....there was no ego stroking in regards to being involved with a younger woman. It's possible to have true love with a person with a considerable age difference.

posted May 26, 2008 09:28 PM         

If this is "fated" then why isn't he unbareably miserable like i am? Why is it that i'm the only one who is delivering passionate monologues if he is partial to me as well?

I think that in all likelihood, i have driven him away with the urgency of my desire. He's made me needy, and foolishly i have let him know that.

I concur that age is just a number, i don't think at all that the age difference matters, but then again... what do i know? I'm simply 17, well, almost 18, and have had no experience with a situation like this up until 2 years ago.

posted May 27, 2008 12:56 AM         

"Sometimes love isn't enough"

Up until then I'd thought that if you loved someone nothing else would matter, but thats not true in reality unfortunately. I learnt that lesson just before I turned 30.

posted May 27, 2008 05:10 AM         

why did i skip this thread i dont know.
Meta u took a reading from me didnt you ?

posted May 28, 2008 10:19 AM         

Chiron: Cancer 21*34' 54"
Lilith: Sag 0* 47' 52"
Vertex: Gemini 23* 23' 48"
Ceres: Leo 21* 1' 10"
Pallas: Cancer 16* 52' 19"
Juno: Scorpio 12* 1' 4"
Vesta: Taurus 23* 4' 35"
Psyche: Gemini 5* 26' 30"
Eros: Gemini 13* 24' 31"
Valentine: Scorpio 9* 9' 32"
Nemesis: Pisces 20* 33' 59"
Chaos: Taurus 17* 4' 56"
Karma: Pisces 27* 18' 52"

His:
Chiron: Aries 0* 16' 35"
Lilith: Taurus 21* 48' 23"
Vertex: Gemini 19* 59' 53"
Ceres: Scoprio 2* 21' 14"
Pallas: Virgo 16* 34' 2"
Juno: Scorpio 9* 40' 20"
Vesta: Pisces 17* 38' 25"
Psyche: Scorpio 20* 59' 20"
Eros: Libra 6* 4' 19"
Valentine: Cancer 17* 39' 3"
Nemesis: Aries 21* 45' 44"
Chaos: Aries 18* 3' 54"
Karma: Scorpio 11* 8' 15"

Mine:

His:

posted May 28, 2008 11:10 AM         

AMEN!

posted May 29, 2008 01:44 AM         

here look at this...

your
Chiron: Cancer 21*34' 54"
Pallas: Cancer 16* 52' 19"
His:
Valentine: Cancer 17* 39' 3"

do u know what chiron means ... google on this . its the wound that never heals. and after 5 lives apart from someone i can tell u it really doesnt . we have his valentine conj my venus-chiron. it takes a hell lot of love, shrink time and spiritual healing to recover.... and like in my case 5 lives.. real sad ones BTW

ur Juno: Scorpio 12* 1' 4" his Karma: Scorpio 11* 8' 15" ,hisJuno: Scorpio 12* 1' 4"

u were past life partners... no doubt and he still owes u that.

there are more.. can u post degrees of natal planets and house cusps.this is one situation i pray never to be in .

posted May 29, 2008 04:03 PM         

His Drac Chart:

My Natal:
Sun 14°00' Leo
Moon 15°38' Aquarius
Mercury 10°51' Virgo
Venus 21°15' Cancer
Mars 16°11' Taurus
Jupiter 27°30' Cancer
Saturn 20°23' Capricorn
Uranus 6°12' Capricorn
Neptune 12°22' Capricorn
Pluto 15°00' Scorpio
Chiron 22°33' Cancer
Ceres 21°17' Leo
Pallas 16°24' Cancer
Juno 12°46' Scorpio
Vesta 25°28' Taurus
Node 6°56' Aquarius
Lilith 0°48' Sagitarius
Fortune 12°45' Taurus
AS 11°07' Scorpio
MC 19°20' Leo

House 1 11°07' Scorpio
House 2 10°15' Sagitarius
House 3 13°45' Capricorn
House 4 19°20' Aquarius
House 5 21°59' Pisces
House 6 19°03' Aries
House 7 11°07' Taurus
House 8 10°15' Gemini
House 9 13°45' Cancer
House 10 19°20' Leo
House 11 21°59' Virgo
House 12 19°03' Libra

His Natal:

Sun 16°19' Aries
Moon 15°21' Cancer
Mercury 28°19' Pisces
Venus 26°29' Pisces
Mars 6°40' Taurus
Jupiter 26°13' Leo
Saturn 15°29' Aries
Uranus 26°22' Virgo
Neptune 26°08' Scorpio
Pluto 20°54' Virgo
Chiron 0°00' Aries
Ceres 2°38' Scorpio
Pallas 15°12' Virgo
Juno 10°06' Scorpio
Vesta 18°58' Pisces
Node 18°54' Aries
Lilith 21°48' Taurus
Fortune 9°27' Leo
AS 8°29' Scorpio
MC 15°58' Leo

posted May 29, 2008 07:42 PM         

they seem to have great aspects when it comes to asteroids:

Valentine conj AC
Valentine conj Venus

Juno conj Juno in second!!-i mean if they were born close i wouldnt consider it so important cause really asteroids takes too long to move one degree...but their age gap is huge and still..here it is this RARE aspect - which your parents have,dont they?

Juno conj AC
KARMA conj VENUS
KARMA conj KIRON
KARMA conj AC...DOENST stop - all this points to a very strong bond - to me seems it´s a love bond coming from past lives surely...

But why do you talk about wounds? i thoght Kiron was supposed to be important regarding Healings mostly?And Lilith is the one regarding more to the obscure and intimate pains?

Her Venus/Kiron conj his Valentine - to me this shows that he may very well trully love her,and through his love there´s a quality of healing.

IC conj Moon and IC conj IC - definately..this shows a soulmate bond,this is considered to be a very fortunate aspect cause both feel secure and emocionaly conected into their deepest core.

VX conj VX - fated again here..

Meta, you didnt posted your Draco - it is showing your natal only

posted May 30, 2008 01:07 AM         

asteroids don`t move so slow at all, some faster than others.
But they are much faster than Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus, Neptune and Pluto.

posted May 30, 2008 01:16 AM         

we were spouses again in another life and we are twin souls but i died in the witchhunts and left him alone with 4 kids to raise

thats what i meant, chiron the wound that never heals.all my other lives have been a struggle against this wound that our real twin soul ove gave me and him.

today i m healing, and thankfully in a better position to have a perspective.but i tell you, the love and the pain that this aspect gives makes me want to tell Meta 4 to run, run....run....