posted June 16, 2008 06:54 PM         

The fact that he is married means it's karmic anyway and l never met anyone who knew TRULY what unconditional love was, at such a young age.

It needed to be said and you said it! Hats off to you.

(actually l said the same on page 1)

posted June 16, 2008 07:07 PM         

i want to ask you sth:

those aspects you mentioned are with your Twin Soul?

Isnt Nessus supposed to be a "negative"influence,relating to abuse or violence?i remebern IQ talking about this one in one of his threads..but i might be wrong though.

What makes someoneīs Nessus conj otherīs AC?is IT necessarily a Twin Soul aspect?

posted June 16, 2008 10:04 PM         

That's not fair on any any level.

You don't know what it's like for her, or him.

He may not even feel that way back. But she does. And what is beating her over the head with this info going to do? Do you really wanna make her feel guiltier than she already does?

Do I think that he should split on his wife and kids? No. But do I think that he should lie or hide what he's feeling for her? No.

This is a sticky situation.

posted June 16, 2008 10:30 PM         

if anyone looked around at any of the other threads you will see plenty of others sharing stories about their soulmates and how and why they are not together.

i just feel that telling this girl, and encouraging her, that this man is her soulmate causes more pain because he is committed elsewhere - regardless of the synastry between him and his wife. if they were meant to be together - very simple - they would be and all the doors would fly open for them.

you can have love and great love with or without soulmates. and when each soul is ready for the other they will come together naturally. it's a simple dynamic. it's not any more than that.

by focussing on this one person as the only source of love meta-4 is being discouraged from actually experiencing any kind of love in this lifetime. and that's terrible.

meta-4

it's painful watching you torture yourself. and watching others give you the ammunition. you are an exceptionally bright girl. who has amazing qualities and that many people will love about you and want to love about you sweetheart. get off the computer. and go and find a life filled with love. it won't happen here. go and claim it for yourself. trust me - there is a person out there for you. i do see things that others don't see. that person who is right for you in this lifetime is still out there for you. i promise you. you will be happy and you will love and be loved - great love, deep love, spiritual love. it's not the person you are yearning for right now so your heart needs to be open. okay.

posted June 17, 2008 02:34 AM         

I believe meta_4 simply wanted confirmation from him that he felt something strong for her, as well.

It looked like what she was asking for in this forum was what others thought of hers and that man's synastry and soulmate possibility. In other words, just an opinion from an astrological point of view.

I think she made it pretty clear in a few places that she never wanted to break them up, she never really wanted anything to actually happen between her and that man. She was just hoping to get some kind of sign from him.

Which he never directly gave, which hurt her the most.

posted June 17, 2008 03:27 AM         

Sorry, but are you all insane? The guys is probably in his 40's and she is EIGHTEEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anyone who feels sorry for this situation just close your eyes right now and imagine your own dad walking through your front door at home, with an 18 YR OLD and announcing "i'm in love"!

ROFL

i'm sorry but at 18, it's puppy love and if it were my daughter l would be furious that she was even contemplating anything with a married man. I think there is way too much "poor me" syndrome on this thread, in truth.

posted June 17, 2008 03:27 AM         

i know all you wanted was a confirmation if only from strangers that what you felt was not a hallucination on ur part.

i can tell you...its real.

what happens next is upto you or him...and any outcome is neither right nor wrong, becoz there is no right or wrong.

in ur situation would I break someones home ?...No

would I say no if he left his wife and kids for ME ?...NO..HELL NO.

karma is weird but love is Simple..and i m not being romantic, that i can say.

there is a reson for evrything, there is something far more powerful than us that attracts people into our lives ...sure the timing may suck..but there is always a reason.

meta did u read that other thread...where Alisa was asking about her twin soul...i bumped it for you.also i have posted a meditation in soul unions that can help u feel at peace...if u wish so..

and heres my own tragic love story....
http://www.linda-goodman.com/ubb/Forum2/HTML/002886.html

the timing couldnt have been more wrong for me and my twinsoul , as you will know from the story...do i regret it ? no.

i will cheat a hundred times with him than care for that so called marriage.....

posted June 17, 2008 05:46 AM         

Also, I think that an 18-years - old girl`s love and feelings can be every bit as real and deep as the feelings of a 30-year old woman.
What she`s lacking, might be some experiences and maybe the experience of responsibility.
But the feelings themselves are as valid as in any other age.
It depends more on the person itself than on the age.

I also have the impression, that she isn`t even considering breaking up his marriage.
But even if she did, I donīt believe it`s possible for someone to break up someone else`s marriage.
You can only break up a relationship, that is emotionally over anyway. Youa could never come between two people, who truely love each other.

Regarding the example of the 18 year old girl coming home with my father.
I would of course not be enthusiastic, I would remind my dad of his responsibilities towards his family. Of course.
But I certainly wouldn`t question the validity of his or her feelings, if they are really serious.

DD

posted June 17, 2008 06:29 AM         

If he choses to leave his wife and then come to her then great, but no woman or teenager should involve themselves on any level with a man whom has a wife and kids.

As far as love goes, l disagree. 18 yr old love is way more needy, narcissistic and dependent, and couple that to a 40 yr old and you start getting 'father figure' issues!

I'm sorry but l think that there is a right and a wrong when other's are involved. When you have the ability to hurt others, especially children then right and wrong exists. Otherwise, l agree - but that is irrelevant here.

Normally when we are young and we get infatuated with a man who is older it is because we see something in them that we need to fill our void. He is obviously showing subconsciously that he can fill a need such as support or nurture etc.

I think it would be much better to focus on her and her parents dynamic with her to ascertain exactly what it is that compels her to be with a man over double her age.

posted June 17, 2008 07:22 AM         

Are you seriously telling me that we are going to tell this poor girl that her and the man she LOVES are SOUL MATES and then take it away from her????

ARE WE INSANE???

Talk about torture! I don't know if Meta4 has looked on here yet, but I would HATE to be her when she does.

Yeah, she's 18, but how many 18 yr olds do you know that talk about their love like that? I know that my younger friends are definetely like, "He's so cute, do you think we'd make a cute couple. Oh! Look at that other guy over there! He's even cuter!" That right there is narcissistic.

I am not saying that this is responsible. It's not. But who ever said love was supposed to be responsible? Isn't it supposed to break rules and hurt and come after a long struggle?

I agree, I think that this guy is more or less telling her that he's available to her on some level. Even if he's married, he's already cheating. Emotionally. He needs Meta to fill a void in him, and yeah, she's a good deal younger than him, but isn't it saying something that he needs her to fill this gap and not his own WIFE? And not someone else his own age? Not someone else period?? I think it is.

She is transforming him just as he is transforming her. He just has control over himself. He has experience. He knows that to just come right out and say "I love you" or whatever would be exceptionally, extremely difficult.

posted June 17, 2008 09:51 AM         

I agree with what Glaucus said on the other thread that we all have very different views and definitions of what love is and what love may do.

You know I respect and value your opinion a lot, but I have to disagree with you this (one) time.

"but no woman or teenager should involve themselves on any level with a man whom has a wife and kids."
I think there is a difference between FEELING and ACTION.
I really don`t think she should do something to "get" him;
Marriage and loyalty is of great importance to me, and I believe you respect, if your soulmate is in another relationship.
But as much as I value marriage and loyalty to your partner, I also value truthfulness.
In my opinion there are two possibilities: Either this man doesn`t feel the same way as Meta (because he truely loves his wife) or he has feelings for Meta. In this case he should ask himself, if he is in the right relationship.
As sad as it is, sometimes love gets lost over the years.
But it`s up to HIM to make such a decision, because only he knows his true feelings.

On the other hand even if someone respects the loved one`s marriage or relationship, it doesn`t necessarily changes her feelings for him.
As I said there is a difference between feeling and acting. And noone here can really judge her feelings, only she knows what she feels.
There will come a time when she has to make a decision, and probably this decision will be to move on without him. But when this time will come and if this time will come, noone here can know.
Noone here is really in her shoes, and she has to make her own experience as everyone else.
I could tell her how much heartache it is to love someone without having the chance of ever being loved back, but she already knows this. And it`s not like she can just switch off her feelings.
She can control her actions, though, but like always, that is her decision, and I`m not in a place to tell her what to do. I can offer her my opinion and views and thoughts, but that is all I can do. And I believe that is all ANYONE can do.

"As far as love goes, l disagree. 18 yr old love is way more needy, narcissistic and dependent"
I STRONGLY disagree. This may be valid for most 18 year old, but not for all. This may even be valid for some 40 year old or even 50 year old.

I know at least two or three examples that show that young people can love deeply.
The first example are my parents:
They met, when my mother was 19 years old (not much older than Meta today). Both of them had been in a relationship - my mom had a boyfriend, and my dad was even engaged-, but not long after their first meeting they both broke up with their partners, despite many difficulties (mom`s boyfriend stalking her for a time; and my dad`s mother liked his former fiance much more than my mother).
But they wanted to be together; they married when my mom was 22, and ahve been married for more than 33 years now.
My father`s former fiance even met him again some years later and tried to win him back (with some support of my grandmother), despite him being married with my mother.
But my father loved my mother and it has never been a question that he would stay with my mum.
So, despite vehement attempts, this woman couldn`t come between my parents, because their emotional bond was too strong, as every couple`s bond should be.

Another example is my best friend:
She met her first boyfriend when she was 15 and they have been together for 7 years. And all this time, even with 15, 16 years, they behaved more like a mature married couple than teenagers with a "puppy love".
Their relationship eventually fell apart, because they had developed into different directions.

And yes, there was another woman and another man. But both could only come between them, because their love already had died.
There had been "temptations" before that, but they never succeeded to break them apart, when they still loved each other. And they really loved each other, they were not "in" love.

So, I conclude, even though most 18 year old will experience w hat you call "puppy love", not all of their loves are that shallow and fleeting.

posted June 17, 2008 10:27 AM         

With all due respect our parent's generation were COMPLETELY different to the "youth" of today.

Today's teenage has no skills whatsoever! lol

posted June 17, 2008 10:29 AM         

I don't think anyone online has a right to tell anyone that another person IS DEFINITELY their soul mate... unless neptune is heavily transited lol

posted June 17, 2008 10:43 AM         

I don't believe in marriage, however I do respect that it exists.

I don't think you can break apart people who truly love.

I do think you can break apart people who truly love but have temporarily forgotten that they truly love.

True, mature love can come at any age.

I believed very differently before I wrecked someone's marriage and in so doing, my own integrity and self-respect.

posted June 17, 2008 10:50 AM         

But then Venus conjunct Neptune my natal chart. I'm a bigger liar to myself than a lot of people are.

Danger danger.

posted June 17, 2008 10:51 AM         

no, I don`t think our parent`s generation was so different to this one.
We are talking the 60`s "Make love - with everyone" here. And even at that time, my parents never belonged to THAT circle.

There will always be young people, who are naive and irresponsible and will do things they deeply regret and maybe get involved with someone for the wrong reasons.
But there also will always be young people, who will take responsibility for their actions and think about what they do, BEFORE they do it.

You know, I`m meeting a lot of young people. And honestly, they are the same as the young generation has always been. Some are almost unbearable, arrogant and irresponsible; some are mature, social and take care of others.

It has got more to do with education and personality than with being part of a generation.

And I would never doubt your intelligence. What made you think that?

posted June 17, 2008 12:37 PM         

I don`t know, maybe you`re right, generally speaking or in regard to a statistic - I don`t know about that-, but I still think it`s important to see the individual person here. And I believe Meta, if she sais, she feels the way she does, and I do believe that her feelings are as deep as she sais, because I`ve experienced it myself (and I was even younger than her).
And I know how it feels if everyone tells you that what you feel is not real or shallow or just a little crush, you will get over instantly. Because for me it has not been true.
My feelings ran very deep. But after a certain while, when everyone told me to grow up and that what I felt wasn`t real, I started thinking something was wrong with me.
I couldn`t simply switch off my feelings, but I didn`t dare anymore to express them in anyway, which drove me into myself and made me shut down emotionally completely.

I just don`t want this to happen to anyone. That`s all.
So I believe her feelings are real, even if she can never live them out with HIM.
And yes, I do believe, he can be her soulmate, even if they cannot be together now(as things are at the moment; you never know what will happen in the future).

posted June 17, 2008 02:58 PM         

I read through the thread. I know that you said the same thing since the beginning. You just weren't as intense about it. But then again, I don't want to blame you for starting this up roar when someone else did... I don't remember the user name...

But all I'm saying is that right now Meta is going through something that we can all say we've been through... except we never really have. We've never gone through EXACTLY what she is. Some of us may have had similar feelings or been in similar situations, but this circumstance is hers. Hers and no one elses.

SO, you can say that you think this is selfish and foolish and YOUNG and NAIVE and without VALIDITY, BUT... you don't know what it's like. If you were Meta right now, feeling what she feels for this man, you cannot tell me that you would (or even that you COULD) just snap out of it. That you would be able to say "My feelings don't matter, I'm stupid, I'm silly, I need to forget about him and what my heart is telling me. I need to think about his wife." C'mon. It doesn't work like that.

I don't care how old she is either. DarkDreamer said that they had similar feelings even younger than 18.

I think that we need to look at him. We need to stop pointing fingers of blame on Meta for being in love, and dissect this guy. I was talking about this sorta situation earlier today about unrequited love. My friend Andy told me that he doesn't believe one person can truly love another without there being some reciprocation on some level from the other party.

posted June 17, 2008 03:18 PM         

Rule nr 1 - don't **** with married men. PERIOD.

The rest is just my intuition, which tells me keywords like narcissistic, youthful folly etc etc.

Being a person who believes that true love only comes ultimately to those whom have done a lot of work and as close as 100% love themselves, l can pretty much say for a fact that an 18 yr old is not in this position.

Not many people are, infact. Surely you must agree to that

posted June 17, 2008 07:13 PM         

To be quite honest with you, i'm not sure when or how i became the villain in this equation to you, Lara and ScorpioLova. But truthfully, i do not care.

You see, you've both helped me in a way with your vulgar, gratuitous remarks about my emotions, my dignity and my predicament.

Up until this point, what i have been worried about most is a clarification of his feelings. Not a physical exhibition. No, no. Merely admittance and acceptance on his part that my heart is not the only one lingering somewhere it should not be. Four Words. "I Feel The Same". That's what my eager ear has been searching for for 2 years. Two. Years.

So, when i looked on here this evening and found that my morals were being called into question, one single thought came to mind.

"i don't care what you think."

i don't care what you think. i don't care what you say. i don't care what you think you know, because in all truth, you haven't the slightest idea.

And i am sincerely, sincerely grateful for that. For your disgusting ignorance. It's taken me all of this time, all of this frustration to come to one conclusion:

i don't need anyone to tell me it's OK to be in love with him.

i don't need anyone to tell me that i AM in love with him. i know i am. i know how i feel, and i know that the only person who can completely understand what i am dealing with is me. i don't need an astrology chart to tell me that he is meant for me. In fact, i never did. i always knew. Always. The entire point of me coming on here was not to reassure myself about how I feel, but to keep myself believing that i wasn't chasing smoke. That the same persistent love was dwelling in him as well. And i didn't even need to ask. Ever. i allowed myself to doubt what i have known in my guts to be true for months. There is no doubt in my heart now. i am well aware that he is where i begin and where i end. And i can't force him to realize that i am the exact same to him. That's his job. Whether he'll figure it out as i have, or whether anything will change because of it is not up to me. It's up to him.

Will we end up together? Probably not. But that was never the question- whether we'd run off into the sunset. i may be 18, but i'm not stupid. And if either of you had paid any attention whatsoever to anything that i had to say, you'd know that my desire is not to hold his hand at the movies.

Don't mess with a married man? I didn't ask to. I didn't plan on it. I didn't wake up one morning and decide to ruin someone's life, though you may find that considerably hard to believe. The only person's whose heart i am willing to break in this dilemma is mine. Got it? Good.

posted June 18, 2008 01:25 AM         

quote:

---

Up until this point, what i have been worried about most is a clarification of his feelings. Not a physical exhibition. No, no. Merely admittance and acceptance on his part that my heart is not the only one lingering somewhere it should not be. Four Words. "I Feel The Same". That's what my eager ear has been searching for for 2 years. Two. Years

---

he does from what i see....but he may not admit it. i know its too late,but thats what i have been saying all along....

quote:

---

i don't need anyone to tell me it's OK to be in love with him.

---

good for you..

quote:

---

For the rest of you, i cannot tell you how MUCH it truly, truly, truly means to me that you stood up for me and the validity of my feelings. I couldn't even begin to explain how greatly it is appreciated. I am in debt to every one of you. Thank you. A thousand times Thank You.

---

if that includes me...u are welcome

posted June 18, 2008 04:42 AM         

I however will maintain my viewpoint as l can say with absolute conviction that whatever you have with this man - it is NOT UNCONDITIONAL LOVE.

I'm sure it is 'love' but it is not pure, unadulterated, selfless, evolved, true love.

So, taking that standpoint, you are (luckily) young enough and not wise enough (due to your age) to move on and find true love with a twin soul.

posted June 18, 2008 08:58 AM         

i dont think that finding a Twin Soul/SM is a matter of age

I believe in Reincarnation and so,i know that some Souls who incarnate are evolved enough to find their half in a very early period of their lives.

Itīs a matter of Past and how much you accomplished in ãll the lives the person lived and did with them - i truly believe that after a hard,necessary and efforted Path, each Soul has the purpose (and will choose it before reincarnate) their Twin Soul.

Soulmates?Of course they do and many times people often meet one SM early in age,of course when it isnt a member of family...

- My parents are SM deffinately and they met at the age of 17.

- I met my Jonnhy when i was 22.

- My elder sister met a SM Of hers when she was at college at the age of 18.

- YSL met his SM since he was 21 and were together till he died,his name was Pierre Bergé