posted November 04, 2018 04:14 PM            

I am just fed up with all the constant stress and not looking forward to Uranus going back into Aries at all, given that my Sun is at 28 degrees of Aries. I've had enough of the sh*testorm. Several people have remarked on the fact that I have seemed to have extraordinarily bad luck.

posted November 05, 2018 02:05 PM            

I want to commend you for how far you've actually come, by just surviving all of it!

Menopause, tumors... It must have drained you incredibly. Mystery illnesses are NOT fun. It must have been terrifying that your inner fascia/gut materials felt so raw.

Yes. Uranus is going backwards to enter into Aries again.

You are in the middle of transit of Uranus (25+ Libra H2) opp tUranus (Aries) conjuncting your Sun 28+ Aries H8.

tMars will enter your H6 Aquarius very soon. Crossing-fingers here that Mars will help bring an 'energizing' to that health-house of yours.

You've had tNeptune getting ready to leave that 6th house too. Let's get the body-symptom confusion and weariness to GO, right?? {{ }} (been on your sensitive Venus-Moon Pisces )
tNep has also been squaring your MC Gem 13+ and IC Sag. Career/Home (IC is another body-point in the chart. All the points in the chart can be triggers.
You've been wading through one thing after the other---- You need to give yourself CREDIT for Everything you've been through so far. *thumbsup*

tJupiter will move into Sagittarius in a few more days!!! I hope this will 'brighten' your spirits, and bring you buoyancy and Faith (to connect with your Nep-Sag).

When tMars gets to your Jupiter 8+ Pisces H6th, I hope you get sparks of miracles and relief in your situation. It's also your employment house.

The nodes are shifting right now... to NN in Cancer, SN Cap. That NN is in your 11th House, and will eventually move to your H10 -- Career House.

Keep The Faith!!
Look up transit of Uranus opp Uranus-- you're coming closer to the end of this particular 'hallway' ..

There will be one more eclipse to where your Leo positions are in your 11th. You have your Part of Fortune 2 Leo.

Also too... We just finished a HUGE Mars retrograde in Aquarius.

Please continue to keep trying to lift your spirits. Continue to take the best care of your health.

I hope that Venus turning from retrograde ON your Uranus will bring you a change 'for Good'. It is in your materials, talents, money, and self-esteem house.. trine Mars-Saturn H10 trine Juno-Ceres H6.

Let's hope that you will have good fortune mixed in WITH challenges. That you will recognize opportunities as they arise. That you will have people come into your life (Juno) that can help your situation along.

Hey Universe!!!!! UNstick Bluesky!!!
Bring her ALL she needs to get ahead now.
She Deserves it!!!!!

posted November 05, 2018 04:11 PM            

There was a lot of stop/start with this transit. A stint here, a gig there, a contract here, a temporary thing there etc. It seems that restlessness marked the nature of this transit throughout.

All in all however all that change brought clarity to me. I feel more resolved in my direction now than I have ever been in a long while. I like that.lol

I like the fact that I wasn't attached to something and could just "go with it"-even though the initial stages of letting go were painful.

And as it moves over to Taurus and affecting money,security and all that we hold dear,I do sincerely hope for some steadiness.

posted November 06, 2018 12:29 PM            

I lost my mum, two years ago, got my sister back, then lost her again, for the same reason (her husband). I was **** on all through the winter, over something I don't want to talk about, and I just... I'm tired of being the one person that nobody feels any loyalty towards. Nobody has my back, and I wish I could just go to sleep, and stay asleep. I'm so tired of it all. nothing to look forward to, and knowing that people kept ******** on me, and stressing me out, when I was trying to create some kind of life for myself, meet people, make friends, etc. Just had enough.

posted November 06, 2018 12:31 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Radium:
you got a long time for that buddy, better stop making excuses and start getting **** done

---

posted November 06, 2018 01:49 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Radium:
you got a long time for that buddy, better stop making excuses and start getting **** done

---

posted November 06, 2018 06:54 PM            

I don't know what you are talking about. Bluesky has clearly not been sitting around twiddling her thumbs. She has been working very hard to cope with everything and make changes. Please show some compassion. She doesn't need one more person to gang up on her.

Bluesky

posted November 07, 2018 03:05 AM            

In particular thank you Mirage, for your detailed interpretation. I'm curious about the 6th/ 10th house activity you described. As you say, hopefully this will bring an upswing in health and career and once Neptune has trekked forward some way it will stop activating the Nodal axis.

One thing I hadn't noticed and which I'm glad you pointed out,was retro Venus moving forward FROM my Uranus. Lot of Uranus opposition activity. I have been stuck on an art project for some while, but hope to unstick this soon.

posted November 09, 2018 11:27 AM            

Let me tell you a story that is true for me.

There IS beauty with Uranus! And much (!) freedom, which took me, ummm....25 + years to realize. ( I am 42).

Uranus, you see, is a bit of a d1kc head, and likes to push buttons. The more One puts up a fight (can be a mental or physical fight), the more d1kc-head-ed-ness comes out. But if you treat that SOB like you feel YOU are being treated, things WILL change! I know it sooooo easy to just want 1 minute of stability in the chaos and there is none to be found but you know what?! Perhaps the chaos can be turned into something stable?

Have you considered that in this time of your life, other doors are slowly opening, and to be able to walk through you need to let go of wanting stability in that very moment?

I had a horrendous time all of 2012. I was very ill. I was in a bad car accident. Lost my job. Moved back home from USA after 18 years there. Lost contact with all my friends and had to face my (now sober) alcholic mother, for real. I had panic attacs. I couldn't sleep without hyperventilating and I couldn't eat. Things were not swell and I tried to cling on to anything that APPEARD to be stable but it was all an illusion because I was looking in all the wrong directions which served me no purpose anylonger.

The struggle was really real.

Anyway, I will give you the same "lift me up" a very old family friend gave to me when I first came back to Europe late 2012.
I hadn't seen him since I was 18 and he was SO happy to see me! He asked how I was doing and he looked at me and said:

"Charlie, it makes me sad that you don't realize that you are FREE to do whatever you want from here and that is an amazing gift! Don't ever be afraid of the unknown. "

I think about those words, always, when I feel down and it truly helps

p.s. don't let the season get to ya! We have about 7hrs of light here in Northern Scandinavia until February and things can get, well, dark, but FUKC IT! I'll be the damn sunshine if need be!

posted November 09, 2018 12:11 PM            

With your career belonging to the arts, self-expression-- Pluto in the fifth house will vibrationally be good with boosting your influence in that area. If any of what you do involves children, touches the lives of children in some way, helping children, helping children heal, (if that's an area of interest to you), then it could give you more favor, give you a highlighted-edge.
.. I say that because of placements in your 8th (Mercury (children){also your chart ruler}, Child, Chiron, and Sun in Aries H8).

(I'm also synthesizing Jupiter transits, natal Nep H3.)

Right now for you, in going further with Uranus opp Uranus.. It's a time of transformation, where what you 'do' for making your living will have more importance that it 'pleases' you inside. That what you do feels it has a purpose in some way. Brings you inside yourself to search if what you are doing brings YOU a sense of fulfillment doing it. When you 'touch purpose' within, it empowers what you 'do'. Your focus starts very subtly becoming more oriented to what you REALLY want to do. It can create a feeling like 'this is your last chance' kind of pressure... but not true. You have Time. Life starts to head towards including spiritual fulfillings too. {again, I am 'synthesizing' some things here}

To me, if you'll allow me to extend my "playing" with a few things..

Ever thought of becoming an art-therapist? Working with children? The psyches of children? Working with children in crises situations?

Working on a community level with helping a children's home, advocating in groups who help those in crises-- doing something close to social-working (some kind of derivative of it, if that isn't a direct interest).

You have several kinds of blue-line trines, Bluesky!!!!

Have you ever thought of any of those?
Including being a counselor of any kind?
Working with innerChildren too-- children and adults have those.

By the way...
Are you married or partnered?
If so, do you have children?

posted November 09, 2018 10:42 PM            

The beginning of this transit Uranus was squaring Jupiter in my 2 house. Basically I was lucky enough to be able to go through a “I don’t want to grow up” phase. Not really wanting to earn enough money to be on my own. And lived with parents and stayed out late socializing or vegging out. I just worked part time as an assistant teacher. I knew I wanted to be a teacher though. I’ll say this thinking about how much responsibility I have now...I would not be ready to do this at 20. I had to get the misadventures out of my system.

With the meeting new people, college, and settling into job...I am pretty tired now, and over it. I just want some more set homebody and solitude time now. Plus the Taurus constellation is stability.

Sometimes I think what if I went through this phase a tad earlier? Would I be completely settled down by now?

But then people can go through this phase after settling down and it can seem ill fit. (Some other people a tad older than me knew I was being wack like my sister and our friend)

My Cancer Aries friend is going through the “I’m an adult who doesn’t want to grow up phase.” She’s a good friend but it’s so annoying for me right now, because I have to grow up. I am not Paris Hilton, or a real housewive.
I seriously the socializing is my highest priority phase doesn’t get you by. I tried it was fun while it lasted. I started to realize wow I am really not much of a catch this day and age not being able to support myself. If I want to have a partner and get married. So I started to gear up to finish college.

Anyways I think well at least I am not going through this phase in my 30’s.
I mean yeah most people by this age have to work a lot and or have kids. So wanting to go out with people and stay out late it’s harder to find people to do that with.

She doesn’t want to be a teacher anymore since she sees I take my work home with me. She is having a career crisis where she just wants to baby sit and walk dogs. One of our friends wants to apply for a director job at a day care, and she was trying to talk her out of it and suggested nannying to her. On the inside I’m like “yeah! She has 3 kids we have to grow up and we can’t always pay attention to you!”

posted November 10, 2018 02:04 AM            

No, I'm not married and don't have kids. I was married, he did want kids, but I didn't and still don't, for a number of reasons. Though, mind you, they found out when they investigated the fibroids that I would never have been able to have kids. I was not surprised. I had a lot of "women's problems", and had suspected myself of being infertile since I was 16.

I am not great with kids, as I am very sensitive to noise, and disturbance. My elders were very impatient with me for being a kid when I was one, and I now repeat the same behaviour. Counselling - mm, I have been friends'/ relatives' "counsellor" a lot in my life, and have had to let that side of myself go, and be a bit more "selfish". I tend to bend over backwards for people, but unfortunately I cannot save them from themselves.

I am noted by others for looking very "youthful", probably about 15 years+ younger than I am, if that makes sense. I feel more in tune with the generation after me, than my own. Artwise, I am always exploring new themes, and have never stuck with just one style. I am super creative! Perhaps this is the "child" aspect you are picking up on.

I was an artist/ musician up until about 40 and noted for my imagination, until I went on a musical reality show and was murdered by the press, although I didn't do anything outrageous - they were just looking for anything they could ridicule. Thereafter, I found it hard to get a job, and had to retrain all over again. It was a very low point in my life.

I trained in admin, although I developed a fascination for business accounting, and am studying a course remotely. I've passed the first set of exams, but it has taken me forever, as I am distance learning, not working in the field, and have no mentor. I have had to figure it all out by myself, and maths, if I'm being honest, is not my natural suit. Though it is very useful knowledge as I knew almost next to nothing about money, and I have appreciated the learning journey.

Add to that, I've had multiple job losses, not through my own fault but because of employer circumstances, and you can see how it has been tough. At one point I worked 7 days a week for a year, as I was promised financial help and didn't get it.This, I think, is why I developed huge fibroids.

I had issues with alcohol, and to some degree still do, although I'm trying to temper it and choose the low-alcohol option when I can. I'm at a stage where I want to be productive once again, and alcohol doesn't exactly promote productivity. The one benefit it does have is that it calms me down. My mind is a raging torrent otherwise. I am almost scared of its hyperactivity, but maybe I need to welcome this back into my life again.

I did a lot of work on family issues/ anger issues this year, and have let a lot of these go. It has been fundamental in my moving forward, and expressing myself better and more honestly.

I did consider art therapy as a profession, but to my mind the best form of art therapy is creating beautiful works and sharing them with the world, so that others can be inspired and enjoy.

posted November 10, 2018 06:15 AM            

Basically my parents were childfree for 10 years (my mother did not work during that time), until my mother was told that unless she got her skates on, she would not be able to have children, as she would need a hysterectomy. So she got her skates on.

Everything was fine, until my dad had an affair 18 months after I was born - he came back, however. They purchased a very large property, and after a few unfortunate business incidents, they had 3 mortgages on the property, and were on the verge of bankruptcy.

My mother had had anorexia (eating precisely 1 apple a day) from the age of 13. She also had untreated depression. When I was 5, she used to take me to school, go to bed all day, then get up again when it was time to pick me up from school.

She never ceased to blame the fact that she was married and had a child for whatever she hadn't been able to achieve in her life (calling it "being lumbered with a child"). This was to gloss over the fact that her failing to achieve absolutely anything in her life was down to her own laziness, pure and simple. She criticized everybody else, whilst refusing to lift a finger. Nothing my dad or I ever did was good enough.

As for my dad, he has been a better parent than my mother, but is still somewhat ignoring. We have always all of us just lived our own lives. We were never a family, and I suppose it was too much to expect that we should be. He always said that neither he or my mother knew where I came from. I suppose they just weren't prepared.

In both of them, there was this expectation from very early on that I should be a "genius" and that I should know a lot of things "automatically". Well, I was a vital and engaged child, but thrust into a lot of things far too soon and chastised for not "automatically" picking up on (for example) social cues - when I had no other kids around me at home, rarely was allowed other kids round to play, and was 2 years younger than the oldest in my class at school. Everybody hated me, or rather, they hated my mother, and she hated me in turn, and I was a convenient receptacle for everybody's hatred.

I just had no idea of what to do, and was handicapped in many ways for a large part of my life.

However, on reflection, a great many of us are handicapped by our parents in some way, and the secret is to grow beyond that handicap. Because as life goes on, parents really don't become so important anymore. As they decline in health, so their light dims, and their influence proportionately decreases. It's logical, if you think about it.

The last I heard of my mother (we don't talk) was that she had bowel cancer, and I can't wait for it to kill her. I myself think it's divine justice. My father has a partner whom he is happy with, and luckily for him he is relatively healthy, so at least I don't need to take care of him and his sarcasm/ unfeelingness!

I quizzed him a few years back about whether I was the reason for the problems in their marriage, and he said no, not at all. From what I can gather, they had a very brief courtship during which he thought she was a great outgoing girl and fell madly in love with her, and she acted the part up until they were married and she'd got her "Green Card", from which point she proceeded to completely ignore him.

As a woman, I was historically confused about how to act within relationships, because of the sheer amount of lies I had grown up with, particularly coming from my mother. I was repeatedly told by her "get a job and be independent, you don't want to bother with men". Yet on the other hand she still used to send confusing messages, saying "why couldn't you have had kids to please your husband" !!! I think she likes my lesbian cousin and their transgender partner more than me LOL - because my cousin had IVF, and managed to reproduce.

posted November 14, 2018 10:41 PM            

I felt so sad for you being so young and not feeling very loved by your mother. She must have had some giant problems that she nor her husband/your Father could help her cope with.

I can't imagine a mother not wanting a child that she brings to full term. She 'chose' to let you be born. Could have aborted or given you up for adoption? Strange too, that her extended family didn't seem too involved in her life (or yours).
.. It takes a Village.

Good that you and your dad were able to communicate.

Well. I'm glad that you were born, and that you survived, and are now just passing the tippy-top peak of your midlife transits. These will be ended with the time period of final pass of your Chiron Return.
.. You'll still have 'stuff' to contend with, and perhaps by the time your 2nd Saturn Return comes, life might turn sweeter for you?

What I read about some of your chart features is that life tends to be really hard for the first part of it, many upsets and defeats, until the time your midlife transit energies peaked.

That part of your chart-life may have been cresting now. Slowly, you have been completing those. Not done all the way until you've gone through your Chiron Return.

Maybe... there will gradually begin a 'whole new world' for your 2nd part of life. Some progress we make in life, is hard to perceive or assess, except by looking in the 'rear view mirror'-- and seeing how far up you've climbed.

2nd part of life is marked by the Uranus opp Uranus transit. 40! haha, 'over the hill'?? One set of the things of former life are completed, while another with newer things begin a brand new (subtle) start -- ?

Sometimes, I think movements are so 'prolonged' feeling. In the human time it takes to go through them, we might not even be aware that the energies have changed. (Even, changed to our 'benefit'.)
.. Maybe we can be still be throbbing from hurtful things that went down.
.. Takes adjusting (like eyes coming out of a dark theatre). The effects will begin to be noticed, especially since you are 'aware'-enough to know about energies shifting. Slowly slowly slowly. And surely.

Healing those wounds, letting go of what happened to you, will help the health of your body. (Moon 6th)

To go further-- opening your Heart to a sense of Love (agape), will suit Venus (if you haven't discovered that yet).
.. I've read that Venus in your 6th is good for Health. She is lucky in a 6th House natal position.
Good for having favorable bosses (if you chose to work for someone, and, it would be good if you had independent authority {Mars H10} they could trust you with).

There are things in your chart that fit how you said you've had multiple jobs end, due to employer circumstances (Moon 6th; Nep been transiting your 6th).

Moon-Venus .. in Pisces. How Beautiful!
Your Neptune in 3rd House in Sag is a blessing too, for all the Creative Imaginative work you have done.

That Mars in your 10th Gem, really really is behind you wanting to 'accomplish' things. (Along with other placements.)

When I saw the Gemini MC, and your placements there, I 'wondered' if you would get involved in publishing something.
(Proud of you!)
What kind of 'topic'?

I'm so sorry you had that awful experience during the music-reality show. They tore you apart?? awwww. Your 'chart' shows how really very-sensitive you ARE.
Not-fair.... *Heart*
What kind of music did you do?
You 'composed' some of your own?

If you'd want to share any of those with us here-- or, in a thread you'd start over in Yellow Wax Forum, I'd love to hear some of the performances, or songs you've composed?

We have some musicians (and artists, writers) who share their Talents with us (in Yellow Wax). We'd love to listen and comment! .. Leave link to whatever you recorded.
Let us be Proud WITH you.
Some of our Yellow Wax poets have left links to books they have published (or, to the website where book/artworks/music is advertised).
Let us help you sell a few copies?? *hug*
AND, sign up on our Birthday Calendar, so we can Celebrate your Day with a special Birthday Bump.

Some of what I saw described about your chart (as I did more research) is that you have a "Job's Trials/Tribulations" feature{OT bible character}. That's all that 'bad time' and ' bad luck' thing that your friends described watching you go through.
.. This too shall pass.

If you've never read about Job, it's a story of perseverance and faith, in the face of horrible adversity.
Then, when it was all OVER, he recovered Double rewards for all the Trouble and Trials he went through.

Privately, for me it was a helpful that I was a person of Faith. Going through those decades of times, no matter what happened, I threw my whole self-- the energies behind all my sorrows and pains, and things that were good too-- into my belief in the existence of God.
Even if I couldn't 'feel' him, I trusted the Best I could.

'He ransoms me from death,
and surrounds me with
Love and Tender Mercies.'
- Psalms 103:4 NLT

Sounds like your arrangement around FWB is very ideal!

I hope you're doing better.

posted November 18, 2018 12:18 PM            

To tell you the truth, BOTH of my parents were disengaged. Both hated their mothers deep down, and we rarely saw either side of the family. This allowed for a lot of suspicion to build up within the other family members, and even though I have reached out to my cousins (almost all female) over the years, I rarely got anything back except ignoring and disdain. Of course, the fact that my mum was not liked by any of the female members of my family might not have helped, either. It truly is the mother who makes or breaks the family.

It's almost like I was an embarrassment to my parents, in part because I wasn't really wanted as such (my mother said she had me because it was expected of her), and because I was supposed to be an instrument for making them look good. Despite the fact that they were unconventional, the fact that I also was, was an embarrassment. Although, I have to say, there would have been very few ways in which I could please them or make them like me, as they were downright unpleasable.

I was an only child and did not have much encouragement toward social interaction from my mother (she discouraged other people from coming to the house, as she was a recluse and terrified her anorexia and other behavioural quirks would be found out), and so I was very lonely.

My mother was the black sheep of her family, but somehow (through gossip? gradual character assassination?) transferred the hatred others had for her onto me. Because if even my own mother didn't like me, then others wouldn't, right? A few years ago (she had resumed contact with her other siblings) she laughed in her nasty, cackly tone over the phone at me, "YOU'VE GOT NO-ONE! HAHAHAHA!!"

And then she had the gall to expect me to "be her keeper", and take care of her when she got old! I put my foot down and emphatically said No, and that's when things got really nasty - all the threats under the sun were hurled my way - but having read many online forums, there are plenty of mothers out there who behave exactly the same.

Ever since I was very small, people have been extremely rude to me and rubbished my ideas, shouted me down in exactly the way my mother did, as though my opinion did not matter. Radium's response was par for the course, which was why I could take it in my stride, but I am weary of it. This attitude seems to be worst in the UK, where they are a very peculiar bunch of people who are entrenched in their ways. Americans and Europeans, particularly Italians, are better.

People don't seem to comprehend what I am talking about most of the time, I might as well be talking a different language. They are impatient and dismissive and claim they don't understand what I mean, even though I bend over backwards to communicate well, and consider that I make myself very clear. I feel like stamping my foot, and saying, "you idiot, can you not understand English?" I have a soft and well-spoken, "posh" English voice. Perhaps the inverse snobbery and false modesty in the UK is part of the problem.

Starting with my mother, I have had problems with women ever since I can remember. I don't mean all women. There are some who are brilliant and lovely and hardworking, but a majority have made my life very tough. I'm talking, my mother; female relatives; my peers at the all-girls' school I went to (I was not allowed contact with boys for 10 years, and found this difficult - indeed, when I said I wanted a boyfriend, my mother said I should become a ***** ); work; choir; the list goes on. I went for no less than 5 job interviews this year, where the interview panels were all-female. I didn't get the job on any of these occasions. They said that I came over well, and said all the right things, but was overqualified.

Men are less hassle, but I still have to be selective. I had a lovely day yesterday, an afternoon with a friend who is "just a friend", and an evening with my FWB. It was such a lovely evening. We stayed in, made some food, and must have listened to about 100 songs, dancing to Ella Fitzgerald and the like. I am very romantic, and this was a level of intimacy and sharing which I had never had before, not even with my ex-husband. For some reason, there had never previously been the openness and relaxation. We've known each other a long while, and had some fun times, but this was definetely a winner

So, where is this Job indicator in my chart? I'm curious that it has the same spelling as "job" :P Don't tell me it's the Mutable Grand Cross?