posted December 28, 2014 02:48 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Randall:
Teasel, if you would stop instigating trouble, you would have far fewer problems in your life. Charmaine was a real and true friend to you.

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What are you talking about? I'm not instigating anything. This Summer? I did nothing, and what happened? I don't even know. I was contacted by someone, so I contacted you. I didn't mention her name, and no she wasn't: she kept dropping me, and I'd find out that she suspected me of something, when I had no idea what was going on.

posted December 28, 2014 02:51 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Randall:
There's about 100 million places online they can go to. That's not the issue.

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You are on the defensive here, and throwing out unwarranted accusations. Maybe you can give them suggestions? What would be an acceptable site for you?

posted December 28, 2014 02:55 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Randall:
Yes, if it were PJ, it would be the same. If anyone wants to leave, then post here, and we can go from there. And I would expect that departure to be permanent for the sake of peace here, but we still need a resolution for those in the group who wish to stay.

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They want a place to talk, that's all. I don't know what the problem is. It wouldn't be a site for hating on anyone. Nobody is competing. They don't seem to want to leave, though - and they shouldn't be shown the door permanently.

posted December 28, 2014 02:56 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Randall:
Nah, I'm never on the defensive. I'm just calling you out as the trouble maker you are. Acceptable site? They have plenty to choose from. Wherever they want to go. But they need to stop causing drama if they want to stay here. Greg's site (our sister site) CE is a great choice.

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posted December 28, 2014 03:02 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Randall:
Leaders lead. Leaders don't get on the defensive. Leading is simply that. And yeah, you complaining for years to anyone who would listen that I threw you under the bus is trouble making. I still to this day haven't a clue what you were talking about.

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posted December 28, 2014 03:06 PM            

Any member is still able to go over and read through them, any other locked thread for that matter. Some still comment in other threads about those locked threads, which in return creates and continues more drama.

They're trophies for those who've gotten them locked.

It's not about about censoring or hiding anyone's behavior, those who've been involved, read the threads, are aware of what happened, aware of the behavior. It's about getting rid of the reminders, stop giving people the chance to read into things that are over and done with. You can't talk about them when they're gone. We aren't moving forward constantly going back and forth about the drama those threads created.

posted December 28, 2014 03:14 PM            

This is tiresome.

posted December 28, 2014 03:17 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Randall:
Maybe closing down this Forum entirely is a solution?

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Why would that be a solution? The bickering, jabs, and whatever else (from BOTH sides) would then just slide into the other forums, which they already do, I suppose.

I think that would be a poor solution, Randall.

I care about you, and everyone here, but seriously. Address the crux of the problem, which is not this forum. It's how a few people choose (operative word being CHOOSE) to interact with each other.

posted December 28, 2014 03:18 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Randall:
Now, if we can get back on track, what rules need to be changed to help this Forum find peace? Or are departures and bans the only remedy for peace?

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Well I don't know how this would translate into rules, exactly.
It's also not to say that it doesn't exist in the rules somewhere but perhaps the execution of them is lacking... IDK. I haven't dived that deep into it.

One is, pressure is on the mods IMO to take the higher road. They have the tools they need to close threads, etc. They have the other mods support for this and the protection for mods does differ from that of Users, to a degree, even if it's unspoken. It just does.

I think it's just good practice, and healthy for the forum that if things like this blow up, that mods just kind of leave things be without directly trying to take control. For example, if a new thread is created based on a closed one, but it seems fairly harmless. I think the mods that were part of the tension really shouldn't post in there. Yes they can, we get that. But their mere presence causes tension, even if unintentional. They need to have some awareness of their position as a mod and how their presence affects others when they show up after a tense situation. It's not always helpful. It just causes friction. If there's no slander going on (which I understand it takes place), leave it. I mean, yes, it's an open forum. It's public and no one is technically excluded from any part of the site. But as mods, it's also part of the duties to just create a nice atmosphere, yes? Sometimes that involves absence as much as presence.

It's just different when a mod fires back. It's inherent in the position.
You Randall, I remember going into a thread and simply stating that there was no problem, just remove this part, and all is good. (Not trying to point out if that particular situation called for that or not) Generally speaking, I liked that approach. It just promotes peace, and even if they get defensive and a little ugly. For mods, it's about promoting good behavior and peace. Sometimes that requires taking the higher road, lack of response, "laissez faire".

All just my opinion. I think mods need to understand this. Pressure is on them, not that it means that users are not responsible for keeping the site peaceful. But that's part of the mods purpose, is it not? To help users to keep LL a nice place to be?

When TO REMAIN NAMELESS mod pops into threads where they've recently had serious tension. By rule, it's allowed. True. But is it good practice? Probably not. It may not be a bad idea to have another mod come in (or Randall) to come in and just ask them nicely to not make jabs.
It's not that mods can't defend themselves, etc, or post in any thread that they want, etc. Having rights, doesn't mean it's the "right" thing to do.
When we're dealing with behaviors, and mods playing key roles in that, I think they just need to be more aware of what they are doing, is actually doing.

Not a bad idea for users, but Mods have that duty really, to make LL peaceful. Sometimes it just means pulling punches, and walking away.

posted December 28, 2014 03:20 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Randall:
The personal nature of the energy here makes it more delicate, I guess. Maybe we don't need this Forum? It does have a bad numerological vibe from the name.

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I think it should be closed because it's PURPOSE was personal chatting but now it has become personal blows and that won't change, I don't think.

I don't think banning people is the answer. People will leave when their agendas don't fit any more.

They will leave of their own volition but banning seems too intense of a move imo

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posted December 28, 2014 03:21 PM              

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Originally posted by Ami Anne:
[b]Wow. Really? I was cordial and respectful to you the whole time, kindly and carefully discussing the issues here and then you say this? Very upsetting.

You are EXTREMELY rude and you have very little respect for people with whom you SHOULD such as Randall, as the head of this board.

That is called respect for a place in which you CHOOSE to spend time.

[/B]

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Randall, was my remark so "rude" that it warranted such a hostile response? Honestly speaking. Please.