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Author
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Topic: If people would marry after the age of 29
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Rosalind
Knowflake Posts: 2246
From:
Registered: Mar 2011
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posted November 26, 2013 06:47 AM
  
The divorce rate would be lower. I know what you are going to tell me. That compatibility play its role too. I 100% agree but from what I could see divorced people are usually people that got married before 29. Another thing that can be added is that people who marry their childhood sweetheart rarely stay together because people change in the other half of the life. People that marry young usually have Sun square Saturn and Moon square Saturn and these people usually have karma to solve before they get married. Usually this karma has to do with family. Parents to be more exact. There are other aspects that include Saturn but these two are just a few.
Now, what people don't seem to understand is that life is divided in two. First half is usually harder and challenging. The native has a lot of struggling and this is normal because its part of his growth process. But getting married isnt a good idea. Love is awesome and stuff but our mind is still young and what seems awesome is not always THAT awesome. In my opinion, love means to accept the person as it is and never change it into the other person wants to.
I always said I want to get married and have children but I always said also I want these things after the age of 29-30. I never wanted to get married young even though I could do that. I knew I wasn't mature enough and I also knew the right person didnt come yet.
What people younger that 29 need to learn is to have patience and listen to their guts.
Often infatuation is mistaken for love. Mature love doesn't come from the wish to change the other person or to have the expectation that everything is gonna go how we want. That's selfish.
I don't say, people after 29 are lowering their expectations and settle for less, I am just saying that these people see things in a different way. They have experience. They know what's good and what's bad for them. Agree or dissagree? IP: Logged |
TempuraNostril
Newflake Posts: 9
From: Australia
Registered: Nov 2013
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posted November 26, 2013 06:55 AM
Divorce rates could also be due to the fact that people aren't so restrained by religion or the norms of 50 or more years ago as they are now.Having a look to generational placements such as Pluto could be interesting to see how it has influenced people's ideas about marriage and how they are/aren't held within the norms of the society they grew up in. For example, the Pluto in Libra generation is around the time divorces become more prominent and not so unheard of within society. Could Pluto's transformative and destructive energy within the sign of marriage and relationships have anything to do with this? IP: Logged |
Rosalind
Knowflake Posts: 2246
From:
Registered: Mar 2011
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posted November 26, 2013 06:56 AM
quote:
Originally posted by TempuraNostril:
Divorce rates could also be due to the fact that people aren't so restrained by religion or the norms of 50 or more years ago as they are now.Having a look to generational placements such as Pluto could be interesting to see how it has influenced people's ideas about marriage and how they are/aren't held within the norms of the society they grew up in. For example, the Pluto in Libra generation is around the time divorces become more prominent and not so unheard of within society. Could Pluto's transformative and destructive energy within the sign of marriage and relationships have anything to do with this?
I don't think so. IP: Logged |
TempuraNostril
Newflake Posts: 9
From: Australia
Registered: Nov 2013
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posted November 26, 2013 06:58 AM
Why not?IP: Logged |
next to neptune
Knowflake Posts: 529
From: Mercury
Registered: Aug 2013
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posted November 26, 2013 07:11 AM
Nice thread, but what about people who do stay together after their saturn return? IP: Logged |
DaniPepper87
Knowflake Posts: 831
From: Curitiba, Brasil
Registered: Sep 2013
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posted November 26, 2013 07:13 AM
I agree with Rosalind. I'm 26 now, I just have a little idea how marriage works. And I'm into a process of knowing myself, that's the real problem with most people. They don't know themselves and want another person to say that. I need to say that stable relationships is what I want, and before my 26th anniversary, I didn't get enough of it. IP: Logged |
DaniPepper87
Knowflake Posts: 831
From: Curitiba, Brasil
Registered: Sep 2013
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posted November 26, 2013 07:16 AM
quote:
Originally posted by next to neptune:
Nice thread, but what about people who do stay together after their saturn return?
Hello next to neptune  I think the encounter of someone stable before Saturn Return is very rare. And most people get accommodated to have someone by their side, even if they don't love this person. And some people I know are more "older" in mind than myself, these people are younger than me IP: Logged |
Rosalind
Knowflake Posts: 2246
From:
Registered: Mar 2011
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posted November 26, 2013 07:17 AM
quote:
Originally posted by DaniPepper87:
Hello next to neptune I think the encounter of someone stable before Saturn Return is very rare. And most people get accommodated to have someone by their side, even if they don't love this person. And some people I know are more "older" in mind than myself, these people are younger than me
THIS.
IP: Logged |
somethingexcellent
Knowflake Posts: 3852
From: vodka fine, I'm so divine
Registered: Nov 2012
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posted November 26, 2013 08:05 AM
Well ya seeing as how people generally have their lives figured out and are better suited to commitment, not to mention are usually more oriented towards commitment whereas younger people are more blinded by idealisation.They don't call it young love for nothing! quote:
Rosalind: I don't think so.
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12muddy
Knowflake Posts: 1083
From:
Registered: Feb 2013
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posted November 26, 2013 08:15 AM
I'd like to point out that a lot of "young" people (<29 - 30 years of age) know exactly what they want and how relationships work (all that about not changing the other person and knowing what's right for them, etc..). There are plenty people who are older, and still haven't reached that stage. I used to think that older people are generally more secure with themselves and hence their relationships are more stable and balanced. But from my observations, it's quite different. Most of the ones I know who are past 30 are pretty desperate to get married or get a partner just for the sake of being in a relationship. Some clutch their partners like their last coins on earth and avoid divorce/break up at all cost lol --- There are people who stay together, not because they get used to having each other. They are a part of each other's life. They grow, evolve and experience life adventures together. That's love and partnership. IP: Logged |
Rosalind
Knowflake Posts: 2246
From:
Registered: Mar 2011
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posted November 26, 2013 08:44 AM
quote:
Originally posted by 12muddy:
I'd like to point out that a lot of "young" people (<29 - 30 years of age) know exactly what they want and how relationships work (all that about not changing the other person and knowing what's right for them, etc..). There are plenty people who are older, and still haven't reached that stage. I used to think that older people are generally more secure with themselves and hence their relationships are more stable and balanced. But from my observations, it's quite different. Most of the ones I know who are past 30 are pretty desperate to get married or get a partner just for the sake of being in a relationship. Some clutch their partners like their last coins on earth and avoid divorce/break up at all cost lol --- There are people who stay together, not because they get used to having each other. They are a part of each other's life. They grow, evolve and experience life adventures together. That's love and partnership.
Men after the age of 29 who are still immature behave like that because they did not live their childhood and youth.
Regarding the other matter, its a rarity to grow old besides your first love. That concept belonged to the previous century where people didn't have many options and they were forced to marry. Rarely out of love often due social status. In this century people who do that are not necessarily happy. Just used to the other person company and because they think they cannot do better.
IP: Logged |
12muddy
Knowflake Posts: 1083
From:
Registered: Feb 2013
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posted November 26, 2013 09:30 AM
I met my husband when I was 19 (he was 24). It's been nearly 5 years now. To us, there is no "options", lol we either find "the right one" or we don't. There is no "better" coz we know what's good for us and we find it in each other. We've experienced pain, loss and happiness together. Compatible and in love. Life is full of changes and upheavals, but as long as we remain understanding and supportive, we'll still be together. And I know old/middle aged couples who are child-hood sweethearts, or met when they were in high school. Their love for each other is as plain as day. Who's to say that they're not happy lol. ---- My view is that it's about compatibility, knowing what you need/want and effort. From what I have seen, I now believe less and less that those things come with age. IP: Logged |
Barbiegirl19
Knowflake Posts: 2295
From: 🔮
Registered: Jul 2013
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posted November 26, 2013 09:35 AM
quote:
Originally posted by 12muddy:
I met my husband when I was 19 (he was 24). It's been nearly 5 years now. To us, there is no "options", lol we either find "the right one" or we don't. There is no "better" coz we know what's good for us and we find it in each other. We've experienced pain, loss and happiness together. Compatible and in love. Life is full of changes and upheavals, but as long as we remain understanding and supportive, we'll still be together. And I know old/middle aged couples who are child-hood sweethearts, or met when they were in high school. Their love for each other is as plain as day. Who's to say that they're not happy lol. ---- My view is that it's about compatibility, knowing what you need/want and effort. These don't always come with age.
IP: Logged |
summerlite
Knowflake Posts: 76
From:
Registered: Nov 2013
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posted November 26, 2013 09:46 AM
Until you hit that mature age, i don't think you know what Rosalind means...IP: Logged |
Barbiegirl19
Knowflake Posts: 2295
From: 🔮
Registered: Jul 2013
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posted November 26, 2013 09:56 AM
quote:
Originally posted by summerlite:
Until you hit that mature age, i don't think you know what Rosalind means...
Is that supposed to aimed at me....I'm not 19 and I'm extremely mature for my age.  by the time I do reach that age I hope to already be married. I'll be done with college and enjoying my life even more than I already am. When it comes down to it age is only a number. Maturity** is the key to everything. IP: Logged |
12muddy
Knowflake Posts: 1083
From:
Registered: Feb 2013
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posted November 26, 2013 09:56 AM
I doubt that after I hit that age, my views on this matter would be different. Plus, maturity isn't saved for only that age/ I can see why it is said that in general, younger people don't have enough experiences and don't know themselves well enough and hence their relationships can be unstable. But I speak from experiences, that younger people do know what they want. And it seems that they're doing it quite well. They don't to change the other person, don't insist on having their ways, they love and they accept that changes "may" part them. Also, I disagree with the idea that people who get married early stay together coz they're used to each other or something similar. IP: Logged |
SDragon
Knowflake Posts: 156
From: Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Registered: Sep 2012
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posted November 26, 2013 10:05 AM
I would agree with the statement, but only as it refers to this generation and shift in societal consciousness - not as an infallible truth never to be changed again.I don't think it's Pluto that would affect such a thing but maybe it is a shift from the Age of Pisces to the Age of Aquarius? From a collective consciousness that needed to merge, to fit in, to absolve to a higher power, we're moving to an individuated society where 'me', 'I', 'us', needs to be refined and evolved? Prior to the 21st century, 'the good of' was always the norm. For the good of the children, the good of society, the greater good... which worked as long as the person in charge truly had the greater good in mind. Of course when they don't, things go to the negative side of Pisces. In Aquarius, the new mode of thinking is 'Who am I as an individual' and sometimes that type of thinking doesn't merge well with others. It's easy to say it's being selfish or that it's immaturity which may be true, but then again, we're very early in the Age of Aquarius. It's up to everybody in society to re-create the new structures, rituals and beliefs that will help the newer generations understand that they can be both an individual and yet still find their true place within society - for the greater good. - Sun sq. Saturn, Saturn in 7th - Marrying before 29 would have been a disaster for me. IP: Logged |
Rosalind
Knowflake Posts: 2246
From:
Registered: Mar 2011
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posted November 26, 2013 10:12 AM
quote:
Originally posted by 12muddy:
I met my husband when I was 19 (he was 24). It's been nearly 5 years now. To us, there is no "options", lol we either find "the right one" or we don't. There is no "better" coz we know what's good for us and we find it in each other. We've experienced pain, loss and happiness together. Compatible and in love. Life is full of changes and upheavals, but as long as we remain understanding and supportive, we'll still be together. And I know old/middle aged couples who are child-hood sweethearts, or met when they were in high school. Their love for each other is as plain as day. Who's to say that they're not happy lol. ---- My view is that it's about compatibility, knowing what you need/want and effort. From what I have seen, I now believe less and less that those things come with age.
HOW Can you be so sure those people are happy? When you see two parents and a child apparently happy and then you find out the child is been abused do you still believe that family seems happy? No, right? What we see from the outside is NEVER the same from the inside. People can see me as happy, always smiling, laughing and so on. Am I happy? No. I'm actually a depressed person. Would you said that if you see me? No. People pretend and they do it VERY well. Do you know what is is said about Robin Williams? Yes the actor. That he's the saddest person in the world. And we know what kind of movies he makes.
IP: Logged |
12muddy
Knowflake Posts: 1083
From:
Registered: Feb 2013
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posted November 26, 2013 10:15 AM
quote:
Originally posted by Rosalind:
That concept belonged to the previous century where people didn't have many options and they were forced to marry. Rarely out of love often due social status. In this century people who do that are not necessarily happy. Just used to the other person company and because they think they cannot do better.
How can you know that it's because they're used to each other or think they can't do better. How do you know that it's not because they experience a love that you don't experience ? IP: Logged |
Rosalind
Knowflake Posts: 2246
From:
Registered: Mar 2011
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posted November 26, 2013 10:15 AM
quote:
Originally posted by Barbiegirl19:
Is that supposed to aimed at me....I'm not 19 and I'm extremely mature for my age. by the time I do reach that age I hope to already be married. I'll be done with college and enjoying my life even more than I already am. When it comes down to it age is only a number. Maturity** is the key to everything.
Me at 19. I considered myself EXTREMELY MATURE for that age that I wanted to make a baby with a man I didnt love just to save his life ( yes, he had leukemia). Even considering myself EXTREMELY mature for that age I knew I wasnt mature at all despite my good intentions. I'm now 27 and I know what I didnt know then: a child isnt an object and raising him is VERY difficult and implies a great responsability. If that man would have died, I would have been now a single mum. Do you know what that means? I don't think so.
IP: Logged |
Rosalind
Knowflake Posts: 2246
From:
Registered: Mar 2011
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posted November 26, 2013 10:16 AM
quote:
Originally posted by 12muddy:
How can you know that it's because they're used to each other or think they can't do better. How do you know that it's not because they experience a love that you don't experience ?
That isnt love. Its something else. There is a reason why life is divided by STAGES. Everything must be lived and learned on its time. No sooner no later. You can disagree but time will show you I am right. IP: Logged |
SDragon
Knowflake Posts: 156
From: Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Registered: Sep 2012
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posted November 26, 2013 10:23 AM
quote:
Originally posted by Rosalind:
HOW Can you be so sure those people are happy? When you see two parents and a child apparently happy and then you find out the child is been abused do you still believe that family seems happy? No, right? What we see from the outside is NEVER the same from the inside. People can see me as happy, always smiling, laughing and so on. Am I happy? No. I'm actually a depressed person. Would you said that if you see me? No. People pretend and they do it VERY well. Do you know what is is said about Robin Williams? Yes the actor. That he's the saddest person in the world. And we know what kind of movies he makes.
Not to detract, but I will because I love this and want to share it. There was an anthropologist who once asked a member of the Hopi Tribe in Arizona why so many of his people’s songs were about rain. The Hopi replied, “Because water is so scarce. Is that why so many of your songs are about love?” IP: Logged |
12muddy
Knowflake Posts: 1083
From:
Registered: Feb 2013
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posted November 26, 2013 10:23 AM
quote:
Originally posted by Rosalind:
HOW Can you be so sure those people are happy? When you see two parents and a child apparently happy and then you find out the child is been abused do you still believe that family seems happy? No, right? What we see from the outside is NEVER the same from the inside. People can see me as happy, always smiling, laughing and so on. Am I happy? No. I'm actually a depressed person. Would you said that if you see me? No. People pretend and they do it VERY well. Do you know what is is said about Robin Williams? Yes the actor. That he's the saddest person in the world. And we know what kind of movies he makes.
I don't count happiness just from smiles and laughter. I see those couples lost their kids, had miscarriages, achieved their goals...etc... - I see them experiencing the highs and lows together, and I see them holding each other hands, saying that they're in it together. Much like them, my husband and I have experience some similar things, and I know in my heart that we're happy that we go through things together and support each other and still mushy, sweet and kind to each other. So it isn't difficult for me to see that those couples I know are happy. IP: Logged |
12muddy
Knowflake Posts: 1083
From:
Registered: Feb 2013
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posted November 26, 2013 10:26 AM
quote:
Originally posted by Rosalind:
That isnt love. Its something else. There is a reason why life is divided by STAGES. Everything must be lived and learned on its time. No sooner no later. You can disagree but time will show you I am right.
Who are you to say that it isn't love.
To me, love and partnership are intertwined in marriage. Because you applied that "rule" on yourself, your life will reflect those rules. You will probably find your kind of love. I already have mine. I follow my guts and my heart. Lol time will show that my way is good for me. IP: Logged |
Rosalind
Knowflake Posts: 2246
From:
Registered: Mar 2011
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posted November 26, 2013 10:29 AM
quote:
Originally posted by 12muddy:
I don't count happiness just from smiles and laughter. I see those couples lost their kids, had miscarriages, achieved their goals...etc... - I see them experiencing the highs and lows together, and I see them holding each other hands, saying that they're in it together.Much like them, my husband and I have experience some similar things, and I know in my heart that we're happy that we go through things together and support each other. So it isn't difficult for me to see that those couples I know are happy.
Happy with a lot of frustration and trauma in their heart. Life is hard, I know that very well, but to say that a person who has gone through a misscarriage is a happy person, its wrong. Losing a child is devasting thing that no happiness can shed. Don't kid yourself. Couples who gone through this are survivors not happy. IP: Logged |
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