posted April 02, 2010 02:48 PM         

My take on it is that he is kind of torturing you a little. But not consciously. You know you can always kind of regain footing in this situation by just going, Oh I am soooo happy I finally told you how I feel and got it off my chest! I feel freed finally! Yay!

And then just kind of see what happens afterward (what he does).

I got these cards:

-Knight Swords
-Ace Pentacles

So it looks like he's very attracted and communication will be good. I still see him being thrown off though.
BTW- Don't bother googling the meanings of the cards. I never feel the meanings fit what I am seeing/reading.

posted April 02, 2010 03:49 PM         

No, you're not the only one irritated by the response, although I wasn't before. At first I was just wondering:

"Wtf?"
"What does this all mean?"
"That's it?"

Then, I forwarded the email to a guy friend of mine, and he read it totally differently and started congratulating me. And, at first I was like, "Really? It is a good thing to hug me senseless and to thank me for me efforts?"

Then my guy friend explained what a guy who wasn't feeling a girl would have said. So, I guess it's good news but I am a little... deflated by the response. Although it was not required, I would have preferred for nothing to be said than something meaningless. A simple acknowledgment of receipt of the email would have been sufficient, if he didn't want to tell me anything for the time being. So, yes, he is torturing me, and I get easily annoyed.

I really do.

He has no idea the short leash I have. Arrogance? Definitely. Is he aware of it? I dunno. But, let him be in his shine. I guess he received good news.

posted April 02, 2010 06:45 PM         

That's what my guy friend said, regarding the cracked rib comment. It apparently said a lot. I wonder.

quote:

---

"I don't care if this is going to make me look stupid. All I know is that telling you about how I feel is going to set me free. So, whether you return my feelings or not is kind of IRRELEVANT."

---

Actually, I was speaking to my close friend a month ago and she asked me why I was even telling him how I feel, insinuating that it wasn't necessary. I told her something similar to what you wrote above, that it was to set me free. Either way, whether this works out for better or worse, I will be set free. If I am disappointed, I will have no regrets. If I am "rewarded" I would have taken a fruitful risk. This is certainly a win-win solution/situation for me.

posted April 02, 2010 09:07 PM         

I certainly hope that you do get your greatest wish and you two can have a relationship.

No double he is doing the guy thing and going into his cave, thinking it all over. He was probably aware of it at some level, but now it's staring right at him and it's a lot to in.

As for you my dear, take a giant step back and congratulate yourself on doing something that took a lot of courage to be so vulnerable.

You're bound to feel some irritation as you go through all of the emotions you're naturally going to feel until you're able to talk to him face to face.

posted April 03, 2010 11:25 AM         

I don't know when we're seeing each other again. he just said something about the beginning of May. Whatever. I've lost steam about this. I don't know if it is because I'm just suddenly cranky from the IM convo we've just had, or what.

BlueTopaz124, Hellooooo

Yeah, I feel proud myself. Yes, sure. I was feeling very bada$$ on the day I sent the email. I don't regret it now or anything, but I feel like I am over it.

What happened on IM?

Well, on IM we were pretending as if the email didn't happen. Which I couldn't do, or I wouldn't be a Scorpio AC, conjunct Jupiter with Mars in Scorpio. I like to get straight to the chase, is what I mean. Then...I said... so, "someone saw your response as a little arrogant. I might have not seen it at first, but...Care to respond?"

He asked if this person knew him. I said the person didn't know him. And he said the case was closed then.

I then responded by saying that he must calm down. He said he WAS calm. And, after mentioning that I can hardly act as if the elephant is not in the room, he didn't comment about that. Instead he said he was sending a text to his sister at that moment. I told him to forget about it, slightly annoyed. I got drained and felt tired, so I ended the conversation by saying I was going to get a nap because I feel that I was acting weirdly. Instead of napping, I got annoyed. Hence, I am here typing instead of napping.

posted April 03, 2010 11:32 AM         

UGH!

posted April 03, 2010 11:34 AM         

I didn't see the big deal with it. Even he said that he could see how it would look arrogant. I saw it too, even though I didn't at first.

Knowing different perspectives makes a person more conscientious about how they present themselves. I think.

posted April 03, 2010 11:57 AM         

I don't think it's fair to bring what other people think of him into the pic because it's really more about what *you* think of him. If you want to call him arrogant for his response, then own up to it and say you think so to him directly... then you can fight, argue, whatever lol...but at least he will know it's between just the two of you, since this situation really is about that.

I say this with love, because I don't think *I* would want to be told that other people who know nothing about me have such strong opinions of my character without even speaking to me first, you know? It would automatically put me on the defensive, not make me inclined to be thoughtful. Is it my Aries Moon saying that? I don't know. It's just how I feel though.

I also feel like you want a reaction out of him because you've made yourself vulnerable by putting your feelings out there.... I can't blame you at all for that, because I've been there myself (oh, trust me, I have).
I just think that you would get more from him if you wait and let him digest what you told him. He would then come to you from a more authentic place, of his own accord, instead of feeling like he *owes* you an explanation for his reaction or whatever.
There's no need t feel like a scorned woman! The guy's obviously got a helluva lot of feelings for you... it's just about giving him the chance to uncork once he's digested

posted April 03, 2010 12:04 PM         

quote:

---

I also feel like you want a reaction out of him because you've made yourself vulnerable by putting your feelings out there.

---

You've hit the nail on this one. I do want a reaction out of him and he aint giving me anything. Mind you, I was on the red light (for busy) when he started chatting to me. So, he also wanted to suss me out, I think.

As for making him defensive, oooops... didn't intend that to happen. I wasn't thinking, I guess. I didn't find him arrogant at first. But I could see how it could make him seem arrogant. Then I just asked him, what his thoughts were. I thought we could have an intellectual discussion about it. Even have a laugh. Hmmm... I was off.

posted April 03, 2010 12:08 PM         

quote:

---

What is the reason he gave you for putting off his response? Did he give you one? It's no problem if he said he needs space or to digest it, but to keep you waiting until May is cruel, imo. I don't think you should force him to talk about it if he is not ready, of course, but why is he being so close mouthed about it?

---

exactly!

This is what I was trying to get out of him. I even told him that I don't want to pressure him, that's it's cool to react in whatever way, but that we can't act as if nothing happened.

I guess I didn't think it out properly, as to how I would ask. I didn't go about it properly. I don't know.

posted April 03, 2010 01:03 PM         

I answered and said I'd return near the album release date and left it at that. That was when he went to chat, and said, "busy?" referring to my busy red light. Then he said, "yeah right" because I sometimes go on busy but chat some. I said I really was busy. Instead of leaving it there, he asked what I was doing. I told him, and he just ignored the fact that I was busy. I think he was in a good mood. Anyway, I didn' mind.

My point is, I am tryin' to be distant. I really am.

Thoughts?

Ugh. This is getting awkward.

posted April 03, 2010 01:11 PM         

I must just calm down.
and not WORRY! lol mvm

Thanks ladies.

posted April 03, 2010 01:34 PM         

give me a sec