posted August 25, 2012 04:52 AM            

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Originally posted by RedScorp:
Xiiro...you and your Neptune never cease to amaze and trip me the f!ck out!!!

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Aww shux lol

posted August 25, 2012 12:22 PM            

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THE ALPHABET, XIIRO! And everything else!

I feel like you just gave me a marvelous gift, like a beautiful antique book that's worth a lot of money...and I'm trying to "pay you back" by whipping up a little kindergarten-level pamphlet of ideas that you might, at best, find touching and amusing.

Erm, yeah, so here goes!

I'm sorry to reply so soon...but I am just bubbling over with thoughts about your alphabet, and I wanted to record them while they are fresh. Plus, I probably won't be able to write again until Monday (going to an astronomy lecture/stargazing event tonight! And I usually take Sundays off from the computer~ secular "Sabbath.")

A few thoughts:

1) Those squiggles are gorgeous! One way that I motivated myself to learn the astrology symbols was by telling myself that I could develop a secret code using the basic shapes as raw material. I have Pluto in the 3H and love codes/privacy.

And while I am artistic, I doubt my squiggles would be that pretty. I am loving those doodles like crazy!

2) Remember when I said...

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I was fresh from viewing part 3 of the holograph movie, and stirred by the discussion of atavistic knowledge, the Kabbalah, ancient symbology. I thought of you as connected to all that...

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This was actually an understatement. I watched the stuff on the Kabbalah and felt, pardon me if this sounds inappropriate, I just don't know the words...something like fire in my gut, and there was something that reminded me of you with that. Now I think maybe it was a psychic reaction, because I felt stuff that BEFORE I knew how into alphabets you ever were. Hmm!

So I'd be interested in comparing your gematria to the Kabbalah's...any chance you've done that before?

3) Your letter "F" has, as a negative manifestation:

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This person has been leached dry of nutrients and now simply functions as dust.

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I had been playing with ichingonline.net for a while, but kept coming to this depressing reading about being a dried up riverbed, so I stopped that a few months ago.

Then a few weeks ago, I visited a naturopath who used microscopy to figure out some of my issues. She said that I was chronically dehydrated (I drink too much coffee) and lectured me for like twenty minutes on hydration. Shall I cue the Twilight Zone music?

Oh and isn't it so fitting that you sent me a beverage recipe, then?

My real name isn't Faith, I just picked it on a lark. There is no F in my full, real name.

I'm guessing your real name isn't Xiiro.

Who knows WHAT RedScorp goes by in real life, I don't know any common name with the letters he gave. Wadah? Like, Spirit of Wadah?

4) Would my single digit number really translate to fire? I thought 1 = B, "Stirring."

If so, that's ironic, since I have always had an aversion to the letter B. Need new screen name...

5) I am REALLY into alphabets. Any chance you've taken a look at The Secret Universe of Names by Roy Feinson? The book is at my other house, but your alphabet parallels his in some ways that I recall. I used that book and astrology to name my fourth and last son.

6) I was a literature major, and realized through that course of study that I have extremely strong preferences and aversions. Two things I adore in writing are: 1) codes, and 2) when the writing has a musical quality. That is hard to describe, but I'm thinking there might be harmonies between the sounds and meanings of letters that the better authors intuitively tapped into.

Incidentally, you have the same birthday as one of my all-time favorite authors, Joseph Conrad.

7) Finally, I am baffled, trying to figure out why that notebook ever got squirreled away out of reach. Don't people realize what a generous genius you are, don't they all try and pick your brains like I do...don't the roads of conversations tend to lead to The Notebook?

I exhaust myself with all these questions so no worries if you want to dodge them all. I am prone to excess (sun square Jupiter almost exact )

Just one non-alphabetical comment, and I'll reply more thoroughly to your posts next week...

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To be fair, the trine is between Saturn, Mercury, and Chiron. My trine is a bit like a D&D game in Mercury's mom's basement, after inviting over his 40 year old physics professor friend, and the crippled kid from down the street. Maidens are so gonna get rescued.

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ROTFLMAO

Yeah, okay, leave my Mercury to fend off Leo Saturn and its square to that weird perv Scorpio Uranus, all by itself.

I guess it can whistle for its sextile to a Venus centaur and ride to safety when need be. And my Mercury's got some other wide-orb acquaintances, but they are like my mafia, I don't talk about them.

Have a great weekend!

posted August 26, 2012 01:41 AM            

That lecture sounds exciting, how did it go?. I think it's a good idea to take a break from the hubub, but find my self doing it less than I should. I may have to steal your tradition lol.

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Originally posted by Faith:
Those squiggles are gorgeous! One way that I motivated myself to learn the astrology symbols was by telling myself that I could develop a secret code using the basic shapes as raw material. I have Pluto in the 3H and love codes/privacy.

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There's just something scorpion about ominous/creepy sigils scribed all over things. =)

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Originally posted by Faith:
I watched the stuff on the Kabbalah and felt, pardon me if this sounds inappropriate, I just don't know the words...something like fire in my gut, and there was something that reminded me of you with that. Now I think maybe it was a psychic reaction, because I felt stuff that BEFORE I knew how into alphabets you ever were. Hmm!

So I'd be interested in comparing your gematria to the Kabbalah's...any chance you've done that before?

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I have never compared my system to Hebrew gematria. The numbers in the Hebrew form seemed too random to me and without being introduced to them in their systems, I abandoned them out of intimidation. I have a feeling the star bridge is less basic, Hebrew gematria seems pretty cut and dry (these letters are = to these numbers and these numbers are = to these values) From what I remember, the purpose of Hebrew gematria was to uncover similarities in words. If the word "Potato" shared a similar numerical value as "Rock", then the two objects shared a spiritual commonality. The star bridge does have similar elements, but relies more on principals found in numerology.

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Originally posted by Faith:
My real name isn't Faith, I just picked it on a lark. There is no F in my full, real name.

I'm guessing your real name isn't Xiiro.

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Perhaps this picture I drew in my early 20's will suffice.... I call it Chihuahua Mandala

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Originally posted by Faith:
This person has been leached dry of nutrients and now simply functions as dust.

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Originally posted by Faith:
Would my single digit number really translate to fire? I thought 1 = B, "Stirring.

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Originally posted by Faith:
Any chance you've taken a look at The Secret Universe of Names by Roy Feinson? The book is at my other house, but your alphabet parallels his in some ways that I recall. I used that book and astrology to name my fourth and last son. (He's Sam...not a pseudonym, for once.)

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Originally posted by Faith:
I was a literature major, and realized through that course of study that I have extremely strong preferences and aversions. Two things I adore in writing are: 1) codes, and 2) when the writing has a musical quality. That is hard to describe, but I'm thinking there might be harmonies between the sounds and meanings of letters that the better authors intuitively tapped into.)

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In my family we were raised to just do whatever we were supposed to do. It was all very cut and dry. As I got older and started questioning things, I found my self questioning everything from destiny to language; amused over phrases like "Go Away". What an insult... you are not just telling the person to please leave your presence, you are telling them, "I don't care what way you go, but find a way, and go it". LOL Ahh the little things.

I had Joseph Conrad in my Sag Gent's thread I think (at least he was someone I looked at). Just think, one day earlier and I could have shared a birthday with Britney Spears.

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Originally posted by Faith:
Finally, I am baffled, trying to figure out why that notebook ever got squirreled away out of reach. Don't people realize what a generous genius you are, don't they all try and pick your brains like I do...don't the roads of conversations tend to lead to The Notebook?

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Most people I have met don't have much interest in the things my brain is wired toward. The fact that I seek to comprehend spirituality at all is a huge disappointment to my family. They seem to not really understand why I don't just go to church every Sunday and spend the rest of my days doing something constructive like slowly chipping my soul away at a depressing job and consuming hours of television. Even my closest friends can only handle spiritual or reflective discussion for so long before we have to return to talking about boys or people who no longer have time to hang out.

It's a little depressing, but a big reason I wrote down my experiences was so if I ever died as a kid, and my family had to go through my stuff, they would find notebooks filled with contemplations, observations, and complex philosophies. Maybe then they would realize that I wasn't such a waste, perhaps they would understand they never knew me at all. They still just think of me as "the quirky weird one". When we all get together we don't have much in common and conversation can get strained. They get hammered and talk about work, or sports, they are all "tollerant" of my being gay, but it isn't an appropriate topic. And on occasion they will trip and fall into a conversation with me and I'll say something that blows their mind, but they always seem to just walk away thinking... Wow, he really had potential, too bad it's all been wasted.

My family stopped holding weight for me many years ago. There is only so much a person can do and maintain their own integrity. My friends are my family, and though they have to sit through me ranting about some new astrological idea I thought up on occasion (only when I get super excited) they still accept me as me. In high school I we a bit insecure, so I cloaked my self in a lot of mysticism. People were interested in hearing about spirituality from me when I was discussing it with them over a deck of cards, or while tracing the lines in their hands. I outgrew that persona though, so now, I'm just a boring old guy who geeks out on astrology and keeps my contemplations to my self... That's ultimately who contemplations are for anyway. =)

posted August 28, 2012 10:33 PM            

That's Irish for "A Hundred Thousand Welcomes" as you may already know. My father was all Irish and liked saying that as a greeting when he welcomed people into the house. He was a tall, robust Libra with a wide armspan.

I'm half Irish and half Italian, which is a nice complement to my being half stoical and half firebrand.

Anyway, how are you? Did I thank you yet for treating me to yet another fascinating email? Thank you very much! <3

I meant to write you last night, actually, but zonked out like some kind of stereotypical suburbanite at boring old 10 pm. Really let myself down. Part of being cool is burning the midnight oil, everyone knows that, so that is what I intend to do tonight. Meanwhile, I am sipping some Yuengling beer. It's unlike me to drink this stuff but the moon is waxing and I've been getting antsy about everything lately. So a big challenge here is going to be drinking enough to keep it light and festive, but not so much that I warble off to some no man's land of obtuse babbling. Let the games begin!

Oh, and as you can tell, I am going to try and imitate your format here. I've been considering things and there's no way around conceding that your posts look a lot better than mine. They say that imitation is the highest form of flattery so I hope you will feel this as complimentary (and not take it as a Single White Female thing...because that's also what imitation can be.) So I will be using fewer emoticons, if any (does that make the posts download faster?) and as you can already plainly discern, I am working at this full, "brick" paragraph format. So far so good, I'm not drunk enough to forget that and hit the enter key prematurely. (thumbsup)

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Originally posted by Xiiro:

With that kind of excitement, you can imagine how people may get a bit snobbish over which Final Fantasy is best.

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Yes. However, from what I've seen, I suspect that even if I were to play all of the series, I might end up in agreement with you about the superiority of magic-heavy, beautiful FFX to the most recent instalment (though that really was spectacular and mesmerizing to me.) I actually watched Yuna's wedding before you sent the link, because I was so into it. Thank you for explaining what that thing was that saved her from becoming an organic soup.

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Originally posted by Xiiro:

Earth in this time feels so restricted and small compared to how my insides want to experience it. I played around with being pagan in high school, but Paganism isn't much of a stretch from Christianity HAha.

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An emphatic "YES" to the first sentence, and a plea to tell me more about those pagan/Christian similarities, please. What kind of pagan were you? Is it because Christianity has absorbed so much of paganism, carrying on its traditions since, what, the time of the Sumerians and Babylon?

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Originally posted by Xiiro:
I love this scene, especially the protesting Starfish and the wailing shrimp.

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"He's just a boy!!!"

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Originally posted by Xiiro:
At the end of the quest, you can even turn your self into a giant cabbage, Exclaim that they have foolishly helped you complete your potion for becoming a nature god, and fight them until you are defeated (showering them with rare rewards for their efforts). I enjoyed interacting with players a lot and making the world seem as unscripted as possible.

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That is so friggin' awesome. Can I buy it in stores? I wanna do all that, vicariously. Giant cabbage sounds good, whatever jolts me out of ennui and reminds me of how plastic and surprising the world actually is, I am gung-ho in favor of. Going by everything you say, the strength and breadth of your imagination is just off the charts...they were lucky to have you, while the good times lasted. But I guess it's quite Buddhist of you to move along...figure out where to flow and flow there.

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Originally posted by Xiiro:
Ironically enough I had very little interest in eastern philosophy, but the 8 trigrams happened to be integrated into the system. O don't ever remember studying the I Ching... I was just odd.

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Damn. Channeled that, too, I guess? 'Sure wish I got to go through some kind of "omniscient phase." Not to be sour grapes or anything, but Cappy here could've USED that kind of summoning power to get up my eternal mountain pretty well. I know you worked for your gifts and studied and planted friendly little karma seeds in your present moments, but for me...being a gal who likes shortcuts...I can't help but kick myself for not, at the very least, branching out with my sampling of illegal goodies.

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Originally posted by Xiiro:
I think the weirdest aspect of sensation for me is my ability to recreate them perfectly in my mind. I can memorize experiences and relive or actively modify my memory of them. I think this is why I gravitated toward astrology, because it is math using feelings. Aries + Venus / Saturn + Cancer = "A Specific Feeling". And the further apart or closer together Venus and Saturn get, changes the equation's intensity. I can even get into states when I notice a planet progress into a different sign just by how the flavor of the moment shifts.

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Is anyone else here reading this? Please hop into the discussion and thank Xiiro for blowing your mind again. It's the least you can do.

My reaction, beyond thanks, is just "holy sh*t." That is fantastic. There have been times when I am drifting off to sleep where re-live moments from my past as if I were completely immersed in them. If I could even harness that semi-dream state, I'd be happy, but to harness those feelings at will AND correlate them with an astro-encyclopedia of math-emotion would be MIGHTY FINE. I guess your Virgo moon can make tidy sense of what sun-Neptune extracts from the ether? Is there anything in your chart that you ascribe this ability to?

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Originally posted by Xiiro:
I was taught that you just have to memorize numbers, but I think in systems. If they started off by teaching me mathematical systems, I would probably understand a lot more than I do now.

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I love that you can feel your way through numbers. I have been aiming for the same, and sort of along those lines, I have made some halting attempts to learn the Chinese abacus and teach it to my children. Being tactile and visual, it's fairly simple to convert into a manipulatable mental construct. Altogether, I think there is a point where mathematics and intuition converge, because I think there is math in everything of our being. The elements are math. Time is math. Why can't the soul be math? It seems Pythagoras was barking up that tree and managed to excite his cultists into a frenzy about that very thing...but history has chopped Pythagoras to pieces for being a freak, and there's not much left to learn there. I've been consulting the library about it so you can trust me on that one.

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Originally posted by Xiiro:
I believe our perceptions and mechanisms are so unique, they would be alien to anyone else who inhabited our system. Too much is repressed in people based on our projected idea of external expectations.

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I'll drink to that!!

posted August 28, 2012 11:51 PM            

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Originally posted by Faith:
So I will be using fewer emoticons, if any (does that make the posts download faster?)

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YES the posts appear much faster. Even if I did forget that semicolon, end-parentheses automatically becomes a smiley wink. I'd edit them out but don't want to get too fanatical about this Xiiro-wannabe project..serendipitous, almost, that they saved me from carbon-copyhood.

But oy, I just wasted a full brick paragraph on lager loquacity.

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Originally posted by Xiiro:
By the way, my teddy bear is named Niko (short for Nikola Tesla), because he is my dream guy HAHa.

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LOL. Aw, and Tesla was a Cancer so that's kind of fitting! Apart from the pun, would you really like a guy like Tesla? Is he your physical type at all, or is it the wizardry that's a draw?

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Originally posted by Xiiro:
(bear with me if I already told this story) When I was young I awoke to the feeling of being kissed on the cheek, then a voice whispered in my ear, "When you were born, I whispered "The Answer" into your ear".

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Beautiful, and I believe it. No, never heard the story before. It kind of ties in with something else I plan to tell you about eventually tonight.

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Originally posted by Xiiro:

That lecture sounds exciting, how did it go?

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It would have been fantastic, but my kids were too tired to appreciate it, they got rammy, and we had to leave early. The fellow who did the star talk was big and Santa-esque with a sweet, raspy voice. He stood behind a little campfire and, while his colleague pointed a laser up to the sky, he acted out the mythology of the constellations and stars. I have found that people who like stars are reliably interesting and quirky; I want that guy to be my friend.

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Originally posted by Xiiro:

There's just something scorpion about ominous/creepy sigils scribed all over things. =)

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FYI I've been keeping wikipedia open so I can know what you are talking about. I never heard the term "sigil" before but, reading about it, I can't believe I've been ignorant of it this long. Have you proved out the magical potential of them? I mean do they work? Please talk to me about spells and sigils sometime.

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Originally posted by Xiiro:

It feels a bit like sharing one's poetry from junior high HAHa.

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LOL! but I love that SO MUCH!!! Gosh that is great.

Wow, I can only wish that I had done enough drugs in late childhood to set me on the "right" path, where I might've made something remotely like that. It's all so post-vision-quest intriguing.

And you are like, "Pshaw...chihuahua mandala, been there done that ages ago" while I wish I could attain that sometime before I die! To compare, my early artwork is keyed to "realism" in a highly Capricorny, restrained way, except when my sanity fell apart from heartbreak, and then I would memorialize my Agony in distorted faces with eyeballs falling out of the head and such.

What kind of stuff do you draw now?

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Originally posted by Xiiro:

I haven't read it, what does "Sam" mean?

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Well, above all, it means cute.

^ There with my daughter, earlier this summer. If I had my books here and a more cavalier attitude towards copyright law, I could furnish you with a robust answer that would probably delight me and bore you silly in equal measure. But that book says the S in Sam is sensual, the m is motherly, and Sams tend to be popular folks who have a hard time settling down. Once they do, they can be faithful. I had been digging into Gary Goldschneider's Secret Language of Destiny, about the nodes, and his reading for when Sam was born pegged him as one who would do just that...flit around more than your average bear but ideally learn to buckle down and commit to something seriously. (He's Cap NN, Cap Pluto.) Plus, as a Tiger, he has the same, emphasized issue of chase versus stillness to reckon with.

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Originally posted by Xiiro:

I think that is why I get excited when learning another language.

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Huh? How many do you speak??

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Originally posted by Xiiro:

The fact that I seek to comprehend spirituality at all is a huge disappointment to my family.

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Tragic, it's like they have a gold mine but are too saddled with their own baggage to actually go check out what's there.

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Originally posted by Xiiro:
Even my closest friends can only handle spiritual or reflective discussion for so long before we have to return to talking about boys or people who no longer have time to hang out.

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I'm surprised, somehow I thought you were surrounded by Thinkers who helped keep you infused with Great Thoughts. I guess you generate this mostly on your own then...as many luminaries do.

So apparently we are not terribly different, after all, in that respect of drawing "nourishment" from our online activity. I don't talk about spirituality with hardly anyone, and when I do, it sadly devolves into me "teaching" them because they have so little to contribute to the subject. So....we meet at the New Age watering hole of Linda-Land.

As for your family, it all does seem depressing and reminds me of an even worse version of my family life than my family life is. How sad and morbid that you actually were spurred to writing by wanting to leave a legacy that was understood by those who, out of real love and even for their own good, might have done that naturally and enthusiastically.

That sucks. Can I hug you? ....I hugged you.

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Originally posted by Xiiro:
In high school I we a bit insecure, so I cloaked my self in a lot of mysticism.

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God must hate me because there was no one like that in my class. *sulking*

posted August 29, 2012 12:48 AM            

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Originally posted by Xiiro:
Cool, I wonder if you would be willing to elaborate more on that feeling. Is it just that exciting rush a math nerd gets when they find a button encrusted calculator, or is it something different?

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Ok! My grand finale here. I read that this morning, and my Pisces moon lit up saying, "Oooo it's about emotions! I can help answer this one! You know what to do." So I grabbed a notebook and camera, told my twelve-year-old to man the fort, and headed into the forest to contemplate.

As I was headed down the slope of the north field, I was thinking of the math nerd meeting his dream machine. But I couldn't work with that because I'm not a math nerd. I thought about how music sometimes hits me in the gut because it is like another person has spoken for me...like I am recognizing a piece of myself in another place. There is love in clarity, I often observe, and if someone can pinpoint and articulate a feeling clear enough for it to resonate across space, I think it's like love. I'm talking about universality, not romance or anything yucky like that.

So, for instance, when I first heard the song Halo by Beyoncé (whose sun is closely trine mine btw), I felt warm inside, because I felt like I could have written that. It was hearing myself from afar, which gave me a feeling of expanded space while heating up my core...maybe like a sun shining brighter with its awareness of being part of a whole galaxy?

So I was entertaining that as the possible name for the feeling as I headed into the forest.. but my head got quiet when I realized the forest was mostly quiet. It looks like this:

Now, you see those mushrooms? It rained heavily yesterday so I knew there'd be mushrooms and salamanders galore to visit with:

But I never realized before how they freeze when you stop to observe them. They can remain motionless for at least five minutes, but proved to be camera shy, as this one was crawling away while I was trying to get its portrait:

I can only let my son babysit so long so I headed back up to the house and noticed this rock glowing in the slants of sunshine. Sans sword, it still reminded me of excalibur. The cheap camera and my nonexistent photography skills really amplified that light!

I thought, "Hey, maybe that's a sign, I'll go see what I see, sitting there." I guess it's predictable that I saw these awesome little circles...but I was surprised to be able to catch rainbow streaks through one:

You know some people say that when you see little orbs in pictures, that means spirits are there? I guess that was a dead rainbow.

So I was leaving the forest and still hadn't answered your question but was thinking of how the forest is timeless and the ghosts are timeless. I stopped and kind of cocked my head to "listen" to a thought forming there...and thought of dogs, actually, how they perk their ears up when they hear something....but it's unclear whether they are hearing or knowing something important in their gut and then waiting for audible confirmation of the fact. Like they know their owner is coming home even if it's off schedule, and just wait to hear the car.

Leaving the forest, I realized what it was. The feeling in my gut was a knowing. It made me sit up and perk up my ears in the same exact way that I felt when I watched a video about the Indus River Valley 4,000 years ago and got warm in the stomach. I felt so oddly connected to the place that I put that experience near the top of my reasons to believe reincarnation might be true.

The "knowing" that I felt watching about video was about being back in time. My ears perked up to hear this confirmation from you: "See, I have been showing you this for thousands of years. Remember?"

And it seemed very real. VERY.

But I can never have that confirmation in this lifetime, I don't think.

Completely independent of that interpretation of my feeling, I still wonder if other things are applying here...like my Neptune being tightly conjunct your sun...and I wonder if you astral project or something?

I have to apologize for being this talkative, please take your time replying, if you are inclined to reply.

G'night!

posted August 29, 2012 04:28 AM            

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Is anyone else here reading this? Please hop into the discussion and thank Xiiro for blowing your mind again. It's the least you can do.

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If I thanked him every time, a quarter of our conversations would be me thanking him. Seriously, one day, if he doesn't take me on some wild trip, I can only hope to have some sort of experience like him, hahaha!

By the way, Faith, that's quite the long hair! Excellent for braiding. =)

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So....we meet at the New Age watering hole of Linda-Land.

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More like new age PUDDLE

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Who knows WHAT RedScorp goes by in real life, I don't know any common name with the letters he gave. Wadah? Like, Spirit of Wadah?

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LMAO!! Well, since you tried to "decipher" my real life handle, I'll tell you, free of charge! I prefer, for the sake of length and pronunciation, to go by Dahwa (the a's make sounds like the o does in wonder.) It would mean something akin to "entry" as in "his entry into the building was avante garde" in Ojibwe (my mumma's tribe.)

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Even my closest friends can only handle spiritual or reflective discussion for so long before we have to return to talking about boys or people who no longer have time to hang out.

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Omfg maybe it's just age but I have like no one to actually talk spiritual or reflective with! Not that I mind, but once I get thinking about it, lots of stuff comes up...that and I loooove to listen to that kinda talk as well! Geez.

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Wow, he really had potential, too bad it's all been wasted.

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posted August 29, 2012 05:34 AM            

I can't express how much enjoyment I get out of your writing style. It's that beautiful mixture of light and mind tingling Aquarian randomness filled to bursting with a deep Piscean custard of richness and color. My brain feels like a fat little french kid, locked in a pâtisserie.

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Originally posted by Faith:
Céad Míle Fáilte, Xiiro~

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I loved the story about your father I keep picturing him welcoming people into a warm and cozy home or log-cabin, slightly small for his massive reach. To me your dad feels like a fireplace. It must be tough being a Cap and growing up with a Libra dad. Were opportunities for stability difficult to find, or did you find a way to make it work? Cap and Libra are secret connection, they have a relationship that works astonishingly well for squared signs.

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Originally posted by Faith:
What kind of pagan were you? Is it because Christianity has absorbed so much of paganism, carrying on its traditions since, what, the time of the Sumerians and Babylon?

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I practiced to a point of just speaking or thinking of things in a charged way and leaving them to manifest. I have always been a sucker for stones, so I would often charge stones with different energies or meditate with them to discover their inherent energies. Then I would use them or give them away to friends as gifts. I actually have a huge store of gems and stones that have been charged or used as healing tools, sitting in a box. about 4 years ago I gave one of my favorites away to my friend because she was stuck in a sexual rut (too acclimated to work and kinda lost her ability to put herself out there). It was a deep blue tiger's eye sphere and I was probably 21ish when I acquired it. I noticed when I carried it around in my right pocket, my Plutonian influences on others was supercharged (needless to say, I made sure it was not in my right pocket). Whenever I carried it around in my left pocket, I got laid. LOL so, when she said she was having troubles, I dusted off the box and gave her my hoochie stone lol. The next week she met some guy at the beach and he became a regular bootie call for her. There was a "draw-back" to the stone though which I explained. It attracts people to you sexually, but not romantically. She wasn't looking for love, so it worked out great.

I basically put my altar away and turned the world into my altar. If someone came to me for advise, but refused to hear it if it just came from my mouth, I could just pick up a stick, crush it in my hand, throw it on the ground, and read the whole thing like a card reading. I just took the magik inside and projected it out into the world. The more I researched organized pagan systems, the more and more it reminded me of Christianity. From the holidays and their meanings to the ritual, tools, and symbolism. It becomes obvious after immersing one's self in indigenous spiritual practices from around the world, that the fathers of Christianity did their best to make the conversion process seamless. That being said I became turned off with religion in general, because (especially in the Christian settings) there was too much judgment of others for doing the same exact things just in different ways and with different words.

quote:

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Originally posted by Faith:
Going by everything you say, the strength and breadth of your imagination is just off the charts

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quote:

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Originally posted by Faith:
Damn. Channeled that, too, I guess?

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quote:

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Originally posted by Faith:
I guess your Virgo moon can make tidy sense of what sun-Neptune extracts from the ether?

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The weird brain probably comes from Sun/Neptune being semi-sextile Uranus and sextile Pluto.

quote:

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Originally posted by Faith:
Altogether, I think there is a point where mathematics and intuition converge, because I think there is math in everything of our being. The elements are math. Time is math. Why can't the soul be math? It seems Pythagoras was barking up that tree and managed to excite his cultists into a frenzy about that very thing...but history has chopped Pythagoras to pieces for being a freak, and there's not much left to learn there

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quote:

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Originally posted by Faith:
So I will be using fewer emoticons, if any (does that make the posts download faster?)

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quote:

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Originally posted by Faith:
Apart from the pun, would you really like a guy like Tesla? Is he your physical type at all, or is it the wizardry that's a draw?)

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quote:

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Originally posted by Faith:
It kind of ties in with something else I plan to tell you about eventually tonight.

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quote:

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Originally posted by Faith:
I have found that people who like stars are reliably interesting and quirky; I want that guy to be my friend.

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quote:

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Originally posted by Faith:
Have you proved out the magical potential of them? I mean do they work? Please talk to me about spells and sigils sometime.

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Example:

My nieces have a half-sister who lives far away, but comes to visit in the spring. When she visits, she and the older of my two local nieces tend to buddy up, due to similar age. This leaves my younger niece feeling left out and her attempts to join in their fun tends to leave them annoyed and a bit predatory. At one point my youngest niece came to me complaining that the two of them were being mean, so I had her help me brew a niceness potion.

Really I just had her help me make lemonade, but I had her run around the property, asking plants for their permission to pick their fruits, and collecting each ingredient. Finally I had her hold the lemons and picture her sisters being nice to her, including her, and treating her as an equal. After she visualized it, I asked her to lock the feeling away in her collection of lemons. When the time came to squeeze the lemons, I conveyed that we were actually squeezing the feeling into the potion. That, mixed with the magical herbs she collected (lemon balm), and the sugar to make them sweeter, was our niceness potion. When It was done, I poured 3 tall icy glasses, gave them to her, and told her to go tell them she had made them lemonade. It worked so well, she kept coming back to tell me it was still working. LOL

The magic wasn't effective because we put certain ingredients in, it was mostly in her intention, in her shift in perspective supporting that this potion would make her sisters nicer, and the actions she made to administer the potion. The rest was just a tasty treat. =)

quote:

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Originally posted by Faith:
What kind of stuff do you draw now?

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I'll post more in another response.

quote:

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Originally posted by Faith:
Well, above all, it means cute.

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Originally posted by Faith:
Huh? How many do you speak??

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quote:

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Originally posted by Faith:
So apparently we are not terribly different, after all, in that respect of drawing "nourishment" from our online activity. I don't talk about spirituality with hardly anyone, and when I do, it sadly devolves into me "teaching" them because they have so little to contribute to the subject.

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quote:

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Originally posted by Faith:
That sucks. Can I hug you? ....I hugged you.

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posted August 29, 2012 10:13 PM            

quote:

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Just ignore everything I say about wanting to be a druggie please, I know it's not responsible to plant ideas like that in young adults' heads.

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Hahaha! Nah it's fine, I'm a big boy, I can make my own decisions. Be a druggie all you want lmao! I kinda already experimented around and nothing really stuck.

quote:

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Can you tell us how much Ojibwe culture affects your life now?

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It honestly doesn't ahahaha! Like, I was born on a reserve but I grew up in various cities. I didn't learn about my heritage until middle school. My mom herself doesn't practice many things these days, let alone me. I hardly remember anything from the language, just a few animal names. It may sound terrible but I'm pretty...apathetic about it.

Xiiro

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Or cesspool in some threads. LOL

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Hahaha! Oops.

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Very cool name Red, "Entry" is a powerful meaning, does Dahwa also carry with it a meaning of initiation, right of passage, acceptance, and the sacrifice or exchange one makes in order to achieve entry?

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Hmm...I'm really not sure. I'm going to say no because it refers mainly to the Grand Entry of a Powwow, ahaha.

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I think you found the place. ;D

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Lmao! Well...we'll see, as when I try to type out my musings I usually end up deleting and revising and editing and shortening a lot...

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Yay for Moon in Virgo and its flawless ability to rationalize negative emotional experiences HAHa.

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posted August 30, 2012 01:18 AM            

To answer your question Red,

Moon in Libra (alone, not considering aspects, house, and other factors), would probably hold on to emotions for a while (not vindictively or obsessively, but tasting their memories, pondering other actions and outcomes, and taking the time to discover how they feel about it), pondering them, observing them, and trying to figure out exactly where they go. I assume there could be a greater focus on the emotions/experiences which are more pleasant or acceptable. Leaving confusing or ugly emotions to fend for their self in the reject pile.

Moon in Libra may feel a bit like building an emotional house of cards, one works to create a harmonious personal space. It is important for things to go in the right place, but situations or people who shake things up (though tolerated) can cause a heightened degree of stress. A bit like someone tossing a porcupine into your chainsaw juggling act. Libra Moons can be very tough on their self if they allow their mind to get too caught up in their emotions. They have to remember that emotions aren't rational and they can't be made to wear a bow and sit up tall. Eventually the image will be forced to crumble and the more invested the Libra Moon is, the harder it will be to recover.

In relationship to my comment about Virgo Moon, Libra would act similarly. Instead of rationalizing however, Libra "paints a more flattering picture". Loved ones like family or close friends, who the Libra Moon has committed to, are sometimes made excuses for or absolved of their sins through intentional ignorance of their offenses. It is interesting, because if a person is outside the personal circle they must do no wrong, but if they are inside the circle, they can do no wrong. Often times the Libra Moon knows this is in their nature, so the are very selective of who they truly let in.

Libra Moon is skilled in weaving relationships with others that may feel a certain way to that person, but allows the Libra Moon to interact with them on a level which they are comfortable. Most of these mechanisms and struggles, the Libra Moon will keep to their self, but their actions may be unconsciously based on these struggles (which can leave people confused occasionally). In some cases the Libra Moon may consider certain things "emotional common sense" (you treat people with respect, you give people freedom to be their self, you don't force people to do things they don't want to do, etc...), but they may not realize they are holding people to unspoken standards.

In regards to memory, Libra Moon remembers things based on relationships (That place is weird, it reminds me of my grandma's house. That girl is fake, I knew a girl just like her in school, etc...).

posted August 30, 2012 01:38 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by RedScorp:
I'm going to have to think it over to really take it all in though, hahaha!

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posted August 30, 2012 10:34 PM            

@RS, still it's nice that you have the Ojibwe heritage. I wish I were an American Indian, there's so much nobility and wisdom in that lineage.

@Xiiro,

I don't know where we left off, really? Yesterday morning I posted about how much I loved your drawings, how I meant to say more clearly in my forest story that I think you taught me Kabbalah in a past life, and that even if you didn't, I like imagining things that way.

If you posted anything to me since then, sadly I missed it. But I can console myself that I still have lots of stuff to reply to, and lots more beer to help me move past this harrowing, glitching-thread ordeal (jk, wasn't that bad...not compared to other LL drama I've lived through!)

quote:

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Originally posted by Xiiro:
I can't express how much enjoyment I get out of your writing style. It's that beautiful mixture of light and mind tingling Aquarian randomness filled to bursting with a deep Piscean custard of richness and color. My brain feels like a fat little french kid, locked in a pâtisserie.

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Thank you so much, it's my pleasure to keep you fat! Your writing kind of makes me feel like I did when I was ten, at the Smithsonian Air and Space Museum, gawking at all the freeze-dried astronaut ice cream at the gift shop, in beautiful silver packages, wanting to keep it all forever, wanting to be an astronaut so I could have that in space.

Well it's not a perfect analogy but still, now that I mention it, how cool would it be to read your LL posts from outer space? I'm not ruling it out.

quote:

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Originally posted by Xiiro:

I'm half Irish and half German. I think Gealic is a beautiful language, but I have yet to be in the mood to learn it. Though I am only 4th generation American...

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Oh nice! Maybe we are related...I mean, way back to the Irish Adam and Eve at least. I'm also 4th generation, and I do have relatives in San Diego, but no Canadian detours. My family is from County Cork. That's where the Blarney Stone is. I didn't know that until I went to see the Blarney Stone with my boyfriend when we were living in England, and then I was happily creeped out to be looking at my ancestors' land, maybe, from the top of the Blarney castle.

If you've never been there, behind the castle is a very mystical, shadowy kind of garden, with moss everywhere, gnarly trees, weeds with giant umbrella leaves. It all "spoke to me" very deeply, and I took pictures of the "Witch's Stone" and other occultish objects that I can't recall.

I never wanted to leave that place, it did feel like home...like, on a cellular level. Because my bloodline came from that water, those plants, those ideas and shadows. And the grass really IS greener in Ireland.

quote:

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Originally posted by Xiiro:

I spent time playing around with Celtic Shamanism. It was actually a huge catalyst in discovering the foundations for my own path.

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My New Age to-do list keeps getting longer and longer. Really....I think it's fair to say that the Irish have this streak of polymath genius to them, but it's very understated and humble and even tricky. After my father died...AFTER...I kept finding books written in Greek and Latin on his bookshelves (I was the main heir of the books.) So I asked my sister about it and she just looked at me curiously. "He was fluent in those languages and read books in them all the time."

It's just not something he would brag about. Scorpio Mercury Irishman. *taking swig of beer* ...Man, I really love my father and wish he were here. I'm grateful, though, that he had such a vibrant presence, it hasn't even dimmed too much after 5 years.

quote:

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Originally posted by Xiiro:
To me your dad feels like a fireplace.

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Perfect.

quote:

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Originally posted by Xiiro:
It must be tough being a Cap and growing up with a Libra dad. Were opportunities for stability difficult to find, or did you find a way to make it work? Cap and Libra are secret connection, they have a relationship that works astonishingly well for squared signs.

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Isn't that funny? Yes, Cap-Libra is strange, it's like a "standoff" of mutual respect...or as someone once said:"An armed society is a polite society." Caps KNOW Libras are suave and knowledgeable and well-connected. Libra knows Cap isn't pussy-footing around about anything. As for my Dad, we made it work by being more like buddies all my life. He sort of always treated me like an equal, let me make big decisions from an early age, let me do almost anything I wanted that didn't cost money (we had little). I didn't have a dad the way other kids did, but that was fine by me.

Sending this off now in the hopes that it reaches The Thread.

posted August 30, 2012 11:11 PM            

It may be late now but i chatted with someone who let me know that acid could flip a switch in one's brain that would trigger schizophrenia if the person has a family history of it somewhere down the line.

posted August 30, 2012 11:38 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Xiiro:
I was as eclectic as possible.....Chaos magic springs from the concept "Nothing is true and everything is permitted". I investigated a bit of Crawley's work, which lead me to Enochian Magik, but the further I looked, the more I identified magik as something individually crafted by the practitioner.

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I love this. I love this so much. Thank you for your explanation, it really helps me put so many things in perspective, including (but not limited to): 1) How I think of you, not as someone who's going to get lured into anything but who will test everything out and get to the bottom of it; 2) My longstanding (irrational?) fear of witches; 3) An experience I had where I cast a spell that I just made up, and it actually worked so well that it freaked me out completely. It's a story I never uttered anywhere before, for fear of sounding like a liar. But I will tell you after commenting on a few more things you said.

quote:

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Originally posted by Xiiro:
I practiced to a point of just speaking or thinking of things in a charged way and leaving them to manifest.

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SO interesting.

quote:

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Originally posted by Xiiro:
I have always been a sucker for stones, so I would often charge stones with different energies or meditate with them to discover their inherent energies. Then I would use them or give them away to friends as gifts.

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Ok, so that's real then. Pardon my complete lack of experience, I can only go by your word. I once had a co-worker, briefly, who spent our entire time together talking about her dead friend's crystals and the life story of the crystals. She was so sincere, I tried to follow everything, but I was a young, skeptical Cap who just marvelled that anyone could let their imagination run THAT wild. Looking back on it, and remembering her nature and sincerity there...I think she was trying to communicate something that was true to her and would be edifying for me to have paid respect towards.

quote:

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Originally posted by Xiiro:
I actually have a huge store of gems and stones that have been charged or used as healing tools, sitting in a box.

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Not jealous. Not wanting to come over and rummage through them (carefully) and write love poems to them in my head. Honest.

Just kidding I am very intrigued and wistful feeling. I also have a rock and gem collection (that is one of the few material "things" that I have and actually care about.) But they are not magik. Are rocks like Velveteen Rabbits, almost, that you can make them Real by loving them? Should I be "meditating" with my rock collection, you think, or wait until I can actually, really meditate?

quote:

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Originally posted by Xiiro:
Whenever I carried it around in my left pocket, I got laid. LOL so, when she said she was having troubles, I dusted off the box and gave her my hoochie stone lol.

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'Love that story!!! Ah if only you could sell them. "Hoochie Stones outperform Viagara in clinical tests and are recommended by doctors. FDA not approved." Hehehe

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Originally posted by Xiiro:
That being said I became turned off with religion in general, because (especially in the Christian settings) there was too much judgment of others for doing the same exact things just in different ways and with different words.

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Excellent summary there. I think every day is a Judgement Day when you are part of a church group. That's what I experienced, to an insane extent. Yet the people who were basically attacking each other with vibes all the time could NOT see their own faults. Will never, I don't think, see their folly.

Religions all seems like Rube Goldberg contraptions to me. Do this, that, the other thing, kneel here, say this and you are sanctified and redeemed! WORTH something!

quote:

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Originally posted by Xiiro:
I had no connection to my imagination until I met Pat.

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How strange life is. Never what it seems on the surface. You with your oppressive but outwardly "wholesome" childhood, being saved by Pat.

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Originally posted by Xiiro:

The weird brain probably comes from Sun/Neptune being semi-sextile Uranus and sextile Pluto.

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I have a little of that with Venus/Neptune semi-sextile Uranus, sextile Pluto. Maybe that's why I'm weird. Also, my mother smoked a lot of cigarettes when she was pregnant with me. I always think of that when my own weirdness comes up. But yeah...not at weird as you, sun-Neptune is gloriously weird.

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Originally posted by Xiiro:
I think it is a mix of both. I can imagine I would be one of those people who asked him to explain stuff, waaay over my head to me, just because the words turned me on LOL.

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I'd be like, "You had me at 'Watch me create a fireball in my bare hands out of nothing'."

Hehehe. My husband is very smart, did I ever say that before? He can build and fix virtually anything and can make a trip to Home Depot sound very sexy. I have Gemini Mars. Nuf said!

quote:

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Originally posted by Xiiro:
You should track him down and make him your friend (though not in a Scorpio, chloroform is azz, and kidnap him until he accepts you as his friend kind of way).

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Damn you spoiled THAT plan! *cough cough wet blanket cough*

Actually since I weigh in at 110 lbs, and he's maybe 300+, I was wondering if you could give me some magic pointers on how to immobilize him, levitate him into the backseat of my car, and then make him like me a lot, platonically ONLY, when he wakes up? =)

quote:

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Originally posted by Xiiro:

At one point my youngest niece came to me complaining that the two of them were being mean, so I had her help me brew a niceness potion.

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<3<3<3 Best story ever. Thank you.

Now I will tell you my little story about casting a spell.

Many moons ago I was completely in love with my Virgo best friend who was my on-off boyfriend. We went to the same high school and college. In college, he had a girlfriend, I had a boyfriend, and we didn't see each other that often. But on vacations, we'd come back to our home town and hang out all the time, and I loved him. (This is the guy I needed the Emerson poem to help me disengage from.)

One night we went down to the park and were just hanging out by the creek smoking cigarettes and talking soul to soul as usual. We left our cigarette butts there.

Next day, I returned to the same spot and decided that he was going to do more than just talk to me next time. I was deciding this while picking up our cigarette butts and talking to them and making them "kiss."
LOL!

That night he called me up and was like, "Let's go back down to the creek. I want to hang out there again." And I'll be damned if we weren't doing our rated R stuff right ON the cigarettes, we were so close to there.

That's the day I was a witch. Only time in my life. I liked it very much.

posted August 30, 2012 11:48 PM            

These things caught my attention especially:
- Heightened stress from disharmony
- hard on self
- Struggling and leaving people confused
- Holding people to unspoken standards
(dead on correct)
-remembers things based on relationships.

posted August 30, 2012 11:51 PM            

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Originally posted by C1ND3R:
Had they never taken the acid, the schizophrenia would've never "activated" and once it's on, it can't be undone.

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Well then both of Xiiro's minds are brilliant! Double the fun.

posted August 31, 2012 04:05 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Randall:
The server had been spiking all day, and I mean really high. It's fixed now.

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posted August 31, 2012 06:31 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Faith:
I don't know where we left off, really? Yesterday morning I posted about how much I loved your drawings, how I meant to say more clearly in my forest story that I think you taught me Kabbalah in a past life, and that even if you didn't, I like imagining things that way.

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quote:

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Originally posted by Faith:
My family is from County Cork. That's where the Blarney Stone is.

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I would love to visit Ireland, Sometimes I go there on Google maps and walk the streets of the little towns, on google street view. Yay Google (until it turns into skynet, then boo).

quote:

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Originally posted by Faith:
I think it's fair to say that the Irish have this streak of polymath genius to them, but it's very understated and humble and even tricky.

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That is a cool discovery about your dad, I wonder if he learned Greek and Latin in Catholic school?

quote:

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Originally posted by Faith:
Are rocks like Velveteen Rabbits, almost, that you can make them Real by loving them? Should I be "meditating" with my rock collection, you think, or wait until I can actually, really meditate?

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She used to laugh at me because she would bring a certain stone in from a gem show, and I would just covet covet covet it. I would play with it, smell it, and eventually (without fail) I would blow my paycheck on it, just so I could put it in my mouth. I liked stones because I have such a seamless connection between physical body and energy body (Moon Virgo 6th House). I could carry a stone around and feel like I had eaten a couple vicodins, or smell an oil and get charged with that scent's energy. To this day, if a person has taken drugs (especially acid or E) near me, their energy will cause me to start feeling like I am on the same drug.... So for some reason walking around with rocks in my mouth was exciting for me. It was something I actually used to do as a little kid, except I did it because I loved the flavor. It tasted like the smell of freshly fallen rain.

I used stones in energywork occasionally, but I was more inclined to tweak the stone's energy to be used as a tool to facilitate specific results. It was never my style to create stone frequency shards of energy. She was a pretty brilliant energyworker, and the understanding that stones are alive was an invaluable one to learn. With your Pisces moon, you really shouldn't have to do much meditating on them. There are a few basic tricks to rocks (which also apply to metals). Energy passes through stones very well, but it often leaves a residue. If you have owned a piece of jewelry or a stone for a long time, you may want to clean it before you try feeling its energy. Just being in a box at home can cause a stone to get cluttered with residue from its environment.

To clean it you can submerge the stone in clean water and put it in your freezer for 24 hours. I have found this little trick works well in cleaning the energy of a stone or metal. Remove it from the freezer with any method that does not translate heat from your body to the stone. Place the ice-covered stone in direct sunlight until the ice melts (until the water is warm from the sun is preferable). Toss out the water, but be nice to your plants and toss it on the ground near them, not directly on them (who wants a face full of stale-energy water?). Now your stone is nice and recharged wee! There are other methods that work, but this is the easiest for beginners.

The key to stone energy is paying attention to subtlety. Think of the stone like a child. you don't look at a kid and say, "Okay, what kind of kid stuff can you do?" you just observe and learn how to relate with each one based on their unique personality. Certain types of stones (all tourmalines, all fluorites, all calcites, all citrines or amatrines, etc..) work similarly, but each stone has very unique properties. Study the shape of the stone, the color, notice inclusions, terminations, geometries, trapped water, some stones fit perfectly in a part of your hand (that is a neat feeling) and the stone becomes like a tool. Just observe how you feel when you hold the stone. It is important to remember that our mind gives things description, the natural state of things is unconditional (at least in my experience of the world it is). You wouldn't put two little boys next to each other and determine they both share exactly the same personality, because they are boys. You would also not relate to two stones with similar traits in this way. Sometimes an ugly stone just makes you feel amazing and that beautiful stone you can't put down is more appropriately suited for your next door neighbor. You will do well if you think of stones as individually-unique mood enhancers, which radiate or absorb specific wavelengths of energy, and share wavelength similarities when they are made of the same crystalline structure (similar to how people have similar accents when they come from similar places).

Finally, do this test: Place two stones in front of you. pick one up and just notice how you feel. Then put that stone down and pick up the other, notice the difference. Repeat that a few times to see if there is a subtle shift taking place. If you notice there is a shift and can definitely identify a difference in energy, pick up both stones and hold them in different hands. Notice how you feel holding both. Switch hands, notice the difference, hold both in the same hand. Hold one in your hand and put the other on your shoulder, do you notice a change in the feeling of your arm? The Capricorns I have worked on were very sensitive to stone energy. I used to have a Capy client who would shake or jolt whenever I used stones on him. He always got a big kick out of it, because it challenged his skepticism.

quote:

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Originally posted by Faith:
My husband is very smart, did I ever say that before? He can build and fix virtually anything and can make a trip to Home Depot sound very sexy. I have Gemini Mars. Nuf said!

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quote:

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Originally posted by Faith:
I was wondering if you could give me some magic pointers on how to immobilize him, levitate him into the backseat of my car, and then make him like me a lot

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quote:

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Originally posted by Faith:
That's the day I was a witch. Only time in my life. I liked it very much.

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Magik is a gnarly business and it never turns out the way one pictures, because you only create the seed. Once you send the seed out, you can only feed it or attempt to unravel it (which is just as karmically difficult), you can't control every single factor in its realization. A good example is my friend I mentioned, who initiated me into his coven. He is a very interesting guy and quite a powerful practitioner. He also moved his interest in magik toward healing work (though his enjoys the ritualistic aspect too). He went many years without a partner, surprisingly well for a Gemini with moon in Cancer. Through most of those years he studied healing work and even became a teacher at a few of the best schools here in San Diego.

For his birthday one year his mama-witch type person (the woman who introduced him to magik), put an "I'm A Wish" charged penny in a jar every day, from the day after his birthday the year before, to the birthday when she offered the jar to him as a gift. He kept the jar, but didn't use any of the pennies until about 15 years later. One day he just couldn't take being without a partner for as long as he had gone, grabbed one of the pennies, and drove to the ocean.

He stood at the edge of the pier with the penny, listing off all the traits of his new partner. He is kind, loyal, intelligent, attractive, playful, he loves to cuddle, and listen to me talk, he is fearless and heroic like a fireman, etc...(the list was long cause he wanted to make sure all the bases were covered). Finally, he flicked the penny into the sea and walked away. Instead of going home, he decided to stop by a house that a group of his friends frequented. He arrived, listened to some music, enjoyed himself, and after a bout an hour one of his friends showed up with a guy who he had known since high school, and recently reconnected with. The guy happened to be wearing firefighter's overalls (we were ravers in the 90's, we wore weird crap). They hit it off right away and by the end of the night this new guy, who had been straight up to that point, was facing a serious conflict, because he had fallen in love with my friend. They dated for a few years and I was the best man at their wedding. BUT my friend forgot to add certain things to his wish like, "He will be sexually attracted to me" LOL. Though this guy was so in love with my friend he wanted to marry him, he was not into the sexual part. He just loved cuddling, talking, going out, and playing. When it came to sex, he just couldn't get into it (and believe me, he tried).

Eventually they divorced, because the lack of sex made my friend feel unwanted, and the lack of sexual interest made my friend's husband feel inadequate. They were married for about 5 years before they decided to split up and when he was ready to date again, my friends ex went right back to dating women. It's a bummer because he was such a perfect guy, right out of a fairytale. He was so fun to hang out with, his energy was like sitting in a room with the Sun (he is a Leo), He could go anywhere and make automatic friends wherever he went. Plus he was a hottie.

It certainly kept me clear of trying to conjure a guy for my self LOL.

Hope your night went well =)

posted August 31, 2012 07:19 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by C1ND3R:
Well.. This has been the first time i've stepped in here and i happened to have read about the bee "frying"?

It may be late now but i chatted with someone who let me know that acid could flip a switch in one's brain that would trigger schizophrenia if the person has a family history of it somewhere down the line.

Had they never taken the acid, the schizophrenia would've never "activated" and once it's on, it can't be undone.

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Yep it certainly can result in bringing out or causing mental illness. I have no known family predisposition to schizophrenia and I am pretty familiar with my extended family on both sides. I did however pick up schizophrenia from my drug experiences. There were several occasions for years after I stopped, where I would be sitting and an undulating energy with a pattern like rainbow scaled snake skin, would creep up my legs. As it made its way up, the feeling of panic and paranoia would rise with it, until it reached my head and I would be stuck facing panic attacks, fears that the government was listening to my thoughts, and feelings of being tested on my aliens. At one point I went to see a county psychiatrist to be diagnosed for government aid, because functioning in the world was a full-time job that completely whooped my a$$. The moment I sat down in front of the psychiatrist I just cried and explained my symptoms (at which point he impatiently informed me that he wasn't a counselor and that he could make an appointment for me to come in and get prescription drugs).

I didn't go back.

It took years to overcome it, or rather understand what was happening. Part of the reason some schizos freak out is because there is too much contrast between what they experience and what the collective says is real. If a person hears other people in their head, they are expected to think, "this isn't real, what is wrong with me?" when they should really be asking, "Why am I hearing other people's thoughts? How do I fine-tune this skill?"

A lot of it is very hard to describe, but just like autism there are good reasons for why schizophrenics experience some of the things they do. All cases are different because it is a general term for a "condition" which has no set parameters, but for some, there is a way to thrive and be healthy.

The hallucinations for me had a theme or lesson. Once I learned the lesson, they went away. For example: after experiencing telepathy I began to think, "I can't be the only person who has figured this out. I am sure tax money has gone toward secret projects where this has been discovered, experimented with, refined, and implemented as a listening tool. I used to see white vans and black sedans everywhere and my head felt listened to on a subtle level.

Much later I had a break down where I sat on my bathroom floor, waiting for them to come take me away. I heard them come up the stairs, I saw them pacing outside the door, and when I was at my most panicked, I looked down and realized I was not my self. I was my grandfather, and the people outside the door were now just my drunk father looking to beat the crap out of me. Then I started changing into different people, in different scenarios, with the same theme. My head kinda just popped open when I realized I was experiencing a genetic memory, passed down from my genetic lineage. It was a fear of "that which I believe to be bigger than me". The moment I realized my mind was creating the scenario to teach me how to break out of a debilitating habit, the entire thing just vanished.

posted August 31, 2012 09:32 AM            

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Originally posted by Xiiro:

I remember bringing up the possibility that what you experience as me in the energy, may be your mind attempting to classify an unfamiliar experience. I wondered what you would uncover if you "decapitated" me (in the Buddhist sense) and continued investigating that energy. =)

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But if I decapitate you, who is going to tell me that they taught me this before?? Half-kidding. It's actually a good question that I'm keen on investigating. Just as a side note, though...here's another instance where I feel Buddhism is geared more towards men, because that analogy feels so unworkable to me-of-little-testosterone. Chop a head off? Can't I just give the "evil eye" or serve a poisonous pie or something?

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Originally posted by Xiiro:
The only thing I know past the ancestors who traveled here, is that the family was Catholic and one of the founding/ruling families in ancient Ireland (which means a crap load of people have the same last name and every one of them is named either Patrick, John, Joseph, or Mary. LOL).

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You just named most of my immediate family! Ha! And I was also told that my ancestors were rulers. Maybe ruler meant something like "mayor" nowadays.

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Originally posted by Xiiro:

Well now we know where you got your gift with words. =)

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Thanks...and your gift o' the gab as well. =)

I've never read much by Irish authors except for Angela's Ashes by Frank McCourt, which has to be the funniest book I ever read. It is also tragic and brilliant. Ever read that? It's phenomenal.

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Originally posted by Xiiro:
Ireland has a weird history, so many cultures and traditions have been snuffed out there and replaced or synthesized with other stuff. The Celtic gods and their stories were quite cool and it only takes looking at a nice piece of knot-work to get an idea of how intricate and magical the culture was.

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So before my college boyfriend (not the Virgo, the long-term Leo) and I went to Ireland, we toured Scotland. He had managed to obtain some pot, and we smoked it while hiking up to the castle that looks over Edinburgh. It was a misty night and all the orange sodium vapor city lights expanded and twinkled like stars, and so unsurprisingly I will have to bring your attention to the fireball that was in my stomach then, as I was just so happy and feeling connected to the past.

Later we wobbled around the city (and passed several well-heeled snobs who expressed contempt towards us, by the way...the Scottish are NEAT and exacting), and then we turned a corner at the the top of this big hill...where I stopped, because I had become completely entranced. At the bottom of the hill, there is a gigantic, stone Celtic cross. All the traffic, two or four lanes, I forget, drive right towards the cross which over looks a "T" intersection. I can't put this into words, because I was stoned then, I just know that I stood there for at least ten minutes going, "Oh my God" with tears in my eyes.

My boyfriend didn't really know what I was buggin' out about, but I think he was weirdly attracted to me for being this exact kind of person, who sincerely just felt the need to stop functioning as a "normal" person once in a long while.

Anyway. There must've been some magic in that Celtic Cross traffic sign I found...

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Originally posted by Xiiro:
That is a cool discovery about your dad, I wonder if he learned Greek and Latin in Catholic school?

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Yes. I also went to Catholic school, so did my parents, and their parents, and so on back to Ireland if I'm not mistaken. I actually went to the same two grade schools that my father attended.

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Originally posted by Xiiro:
She would create a rod of energy on the same vibrational frequency as malachite and just plug the hole with it until the energy melted into the person's energy and caused the hole to heal over.

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What's her phone number again? Kidding, but I love that and feel gratitude that such possibilities exist.

I've gotta get on with my day, and will reply more later...just one question, I've been thinking of how homeopathic remedies seem to function like the energy-charged objects you describe. Can you talk about that...how homeopathy compares to witchcraft?

Edit: Somehow my two posts were turned into one, and some of the editing I did was reverted back to its unedited state.
Very bewildering (and annoying)

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Originally posted by Xiiro:
She used to laugh at me because she would bring a certain stone in from a gem show, and I would just covet covet covet it. I would play with it, smell it, and eventually (without fail) I would blow my paycheck on it, just so I could put it in my mouth.

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Wow...what about a gem made you covet it? I mean was there a particular type of energy or look that you favored, or were you at all interested in just having a diverse collection?

Strange that you sucked on rocks as a child and again as an adult. I wonder what's going on with that. Thinking about things that I did as a kid and picked up again as an adult...the one thing that comes to mind is that I LOVED foraging for "wild" food back then, eating shamocks and onion grass, and I'm the same way now, and my kids are picking up the habit. Yesterday my son and daughter collected three jars of hawthorn berries from our bushes and tried to sell them at a roadside stand. About twenty cars pass our property each day and sadly there were no takers. Today they are doing well selling lemonade though, and they plan to sell gallon-sized bags of red clover. There are plenty of horse-owners around here who might buy it for a snack, and savvy herbalists might be interested, too. I actually hope no one buys their inventory because I'll want it!

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Originally posted by Xiiro:

With your Pisces moon, you really shouldn't have to do much meditating on them.

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Thanks for that vote of confidence because I actually feel very protective of my gems and crystals already, and do have specific feelings about them (I've just got amethysts, garnets, and some others that I can't even name) but never felt capable of pinpointing or articulating even to myself what the differences are. Maybe I could, I just didn't have confidence. They are all at my other house so it'll be months before I can try your suggestions.

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Originally posted by Xiiro:
To clean it you can submerge the stone in clean water and put it in your freezer for 24 hours.

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Does that have anything to do with water reverting to a more crystalline shape when it freezes? I heard that freezing purifies water by reshaping its molecules into a more bio-available form. 'Wonder if there's any connection there. I'm just fascinated by this step in the process. (Nutty housewife here wants to know how much "cleaning" power her freezer has.)

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Originally posted by Xiiro:
Certain types of stones (all tourmalines, all fluorites, all calcites, all citrines or amatrines, etc..) work similarly, but each stone has very unique properties. Study the shape of the stone, the color, notice inclusions, terminations, geometries, trapped water, some stones fit perfectly in a part of your hand (that is a neat feeling) and the stone becomes like a tool.

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Question, did you study this formally...IS there formal teaching about which crystals do what...or did you learn it more through experience and testing..or I guess it's probably a combination? It just seems daunting to me right now, to think of ever getting a grasp of it.

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Originally posted by Xiiro:
I have all sorts of shameful stories of my beginnings with spell casting. My Leo friend and I discovered that we could have charged conversations about people and the things we talked about would happen. Unfortunately after a couple incedents, we put the kibosh on that.

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WOW. So fun, though!

Any chance that this kind of thing just happens spontaneously with people who don't know anything about witchcraft...who just have charged conversations, or strong intentions, or even through prayer...when a person's will ripples out into the world invisibly like that, is that like the Force, and if so, are the different methods of harnessing the force significant to you at all? I know, I'm all about questions...please ignore if they bore.

I loved the story of your Gemini sun/Cancer moon friend using his wish and getting (almost) the guy of his dreams. Very interesting. I can see why it would make you leery of using a wish penny to get a man.

One of my best friends from childhood, incidentally, is a woman who married a woman, but she still wouldn't call herself a lesbian. "I don't like women, I just love Sara." And she and Sara watch movies and my friend crushes on the guys, and that's their life. Kind of puzzling, but that's her life. I guess there are lots of people like that; I actually can think of a talk show I once saw on YouTube about this very thing.

Ok, now I'm done. Sorry for the extreme length. The Lion King is coming home tonight so I might not be around for a while, as he monopolizes my time, as I said. 'Hope life is good for you until our paths cross again.

posted September 01, 2012 03:48 AM            

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Originally posted by Faith:
here's another instance where I feel Buddhism is geared more towards men, because that analogy feels so unworkable to me-of-little-testosterone. Chop a head off? Can't I just give the "evil eye" or serve a poisonous pie or something?

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Originally posted by Faith:
I don't know where my father's father's side is from.

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Originally posted by Faith:
I've never read much by Irish authors except for Angela's Ashes by Frank McCourt, which has to be the funniest book I ever read. It is also tragic and brilliant. Ever read that? It's phenomenal.

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Originally posted by Faith:
...There must've been some magic in that Celtic Cross traffic sign I found...

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Originally posted by Faith:
I actually went to the same two grade schools that my father attended.

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quote:

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Originally posted by Faith:
just one question, I've been thinking of how homeopathic remedies seem to function like the energy-charged objects you describe. Can you talk about that...how homeopathy compares to witchcraft?

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quote:

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Originally posted by Faith:
Wow...what about a gem made you covet it? I mean was there a particular type of energy or look that you favored, or were you at all interested in just having a diverse collection?

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quote:

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Originally posted by Faith:
Strange that you sucked on rocks as a child and again as an adult. I wonder what's going on with that.

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quote:

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Originally posted by Faith:
Today they are doing well selling lemonade though, and they plan to sell gallon-sized bags of red clover. There are plenty of horse-owners around here who might buy it for a snack, and savvy herbalists might be interested, too. I actually hope no one buys their inventory because I'll want it!

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Originally posted by Faith:
Thanks for that vote of confidence because I actually feel very protective of my gems and crystals already, and do have specific feelings about them (I've just got amethysts, garnets, and some others that I can't even name) but never felt capable of pinpointing or articulating even to myself what the differences are.

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God, I sound like Ludo from Labyrinth, or some Rock Rights advocate.

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Originally posted by Faith:
I heard that freezing purifies water by reshaping its molecules into a more bio-available form. 'Wonder if there's any connection there. I'm just fascinated by this step in the process. (Nutty housewife here wants to know how much "cleaning" power her freezer has.)

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The reason I mentioned not translating body heat to the stone, is because this method is used to change the energy of a stone or imprint a stone to you. While the stone is frozen, touching it translates your own heat and energy into the stone, charging it with your own energy. If you put the stone out in the Sun, the Sun's energy is much stronger than the residual energy, but not as strong as the stone's inherent energy. It will burn away any residual energy and recharge the stone with warmth, allowing its inherent energy to express and flow more readily. If you like you can wash the old water off the stone, but evaporation is usually fine. The water then gets tossed out somewhere in nature, so the earth can re-purpose it.

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Originally posted by Faith:
Question, did you study this formally...IS there formal teaching about which crystals do what...or did you learn it more through experience and testing..or I guess it's probably a combination? It just seems daunting to me right now, to think of ever getting a grasp of it.

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Black tourmaline is known for creating a shell around a person, which bad energy just slaps against like a magnet and slips into the ground as if pulled by gravity. Though amethyst is more attributed toward psychic and imaginative energy, one could use its energy to create a similar structure around their self. Especially in the case of ametrine (citrine and amethyst having grown together in the same stone), one could create a sphere of burnished psychic light which gobbled up any negative energy it came in contact with.

So, it's better in some cases to just make up your own rules based on your experiences, because books and classes generalize a lot and may cause you to question the way a stone is asking you to use it.

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Originally posted by Faith:
...when a person's will ripples out into the world invisibly like that, is that like the Force, and if so, are the different methods of harnessing the force significant to you at all?

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Originally posted by Faith:
"I don't like women, I just love Sara."

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Of course because my friend is Pluto in Libra, she just shrugged and said, "and?". Love is an interesting thing, it certainly has its way of coloring outside of our lines. =)