posted January 01, 2014 05:02 PM            

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Originally posted by Padre35: No, a guy who knows wth he is doing never says a single word about it all...nothing.

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Maybe not to prospective dating partners but I'm thinking more "guy talk"

quote:

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Originally posted by Padre35:
So do tell Firemoon, and this will be blunt, if one gave BJ's to the entire football team..would you speak of doing that to everyone?

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posted January 01, 2014 05:04 PM            

I have personally noticed a trend here regarding the difference in perceptions and the areas people live in. Just an observation.

And...here is what PJ has to say about all of this.
http://youtu.be/6cevC5Yb1Us

posted January 01, 2014 05:38 PM            

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Originally posted by Violets:

I'm not taking anything personally here, by the way. I see the differences in where we live, and the standards that are the norm in those places.

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And I've been in the New York City area for two and a half decades, and before that, San Fernando Valley outside Los Angeles, aka porn capital of the world.

I participated in highly promiscuous behavior myself, but that doesn't make anything correct. What is wrong is wrong. I'm well into the large numbers but not proud of it. And I didn't even need to behave like a player. Nor did I need to talk sexual to try to get females "excited," which is a dumb strategy because it rarely works.

I'll b1tch slam any number of pr1cks and s1uts all day long, equally hard, and as much as I want, and when I want. Wrong behavior isn't gender specific, and neither gender is absolved from what is wrong. And I don't give a fsck who says what and when.

posted January 01, 2014 05:43 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by YoursTrulyAlways:

I'll b1tch slam any number of pr1cks and s1uts all day long, equally hard, and as much as I want, and when I want. Wrong behavior isn't gender specific, and neither gender is absolved from what is wrong. And I don't give a fsck who says what and when.

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This doesn't make any sense to me, sorry.
Are you saying that you believe that promiscuity is wrong, and will therefore unleash some sort of fury on the people you deem to be promiscuous?

posted January 01, 2014 05:58 PM            

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Originally posted by Violets:
This doesn't make any sense to me, sorry.
Are you saying that you believe that promiscuity is wrong, and will therefore unleash some sort of fury on the people you deem to be promiscuous?

I just want to make sure I'm understanding you correctly. If I'm not, I would be curious to know what you mean.

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I didn't say I'll "unleash fury" whatever that means. What is wrong is wrong. I don't care whether you are in college or are a grandma. It doesnt marrer what gender you are or whatever ethnicity you belong to. Your upbringing doesn't matter. Where you live doesn't matter. It's wrong.

posted January 01, 2014 06:21 PM            

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Originally posted by Violets:
I think I was just wondering what you meant by "b1tch slam".

Do you feel the need to tell promiscuous people that they're wrong for being promiscuous?
I'm just curious, not trying to be antagonistic.

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No. I have no inclination to tell anybody anything.

Those who parade have their First Amendment right to assemble and promote whatever they believe.

I have my First Amendment right to believe whatever I want to believe. And I believe promiscuous behavior is wrong, and that there aren't very many extenuating circumstances behind wrong behavior. I once led that life before and it was wrong.

As to whatever place whoever goes, I personally couldn't care less where anyone else goes. In my little sinful selfish way, I care about myself and those I love. The wrath of whichever big kahuna befalls whomever is not my concern.

posted January 01, 2014 07:28 PM            

Personally, I do take socioeconomic and cultural issues/norms into consideration regarding "right" and "wrong" behavior, but I think that if a person has firm beliefs that they don't try to push upon others, then to each their own.

Also, I think that in cases of rape, it's very important not to assume that the way a woman was dressed was in any way indicative of whether or not she "deserved" to be raped. That is one of the primary points of the sl*t walks.

To be fair...I've had my own experiences with a lot of different aspects of "taboo" behaviors, and have come to my own conclusion that it's not healthy for me on a personal level, based on the deep-rooted reasons that I engaged in those experiences. But I did have to experience them in order to figure out a better way of dealing with the issues I was dealing with. I placed a lot of my personal value as a human being on my sexuality, and that's not a healthy reason to be sexual.

posted January 01, 2014 07:32 PM            

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Want To Ask Any Question About Bible Prophecy? Go For it. It is Free, of course.

posted January 01, 2014 07:53 PM            

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Originally posted by Violets

Also, I think that in cases of rape, it's very important not to assume that the way a woman was dressed was in any way indicative of whether or not she "deserved" to be raped. That is one of the primary points of the sl*t walks.
[/B]

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posted January 01, 2014 08:29 PM            

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Originally posted by aquaguy91:

I think people ( especially feminist types) really miss the point on this by a mile. When people bring up the issue of sexually provocative clothing and it's connection to rape they ARE NOT implying it is the woman's fault or her clothing excuses the mans behavior. They are simply stating that wearing provocative clothing increases the risk of unwanted attention, and they are right. Think about it this way, if I went swimming in the ocean bleeding there is a very good chance I might get attacked by sharks . It doesn't mean I will but it increases the chances by a great deal. At the same time I could go swimming in the ocean without a bleeding wound and still be attacked but the chances are a lot smaller. When women put on sexually provocative clothing and go out it's like blood in the water for perverts and horn dogs . A woman who does this is going to get a whole lot more unwanted attention than a woman who dresses more conservatively because they are openly advertising their sexuality for everyone to see.

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You probably have a valid point, to a degree. It's probably far less likely for anyone to be stupid enough to think that a woman who was dressed provocatively actually deserves to be raped, or "asked for it". I don't know if this is so much of an issue now as it used to be in the past.

And you are right, another part of the sl*t walks is about unsolicited "attention" from men if a woman dresses in a way that is considered provocative.

The thing about that is that women *should* be able to dress however they want to without being harassed or bothered by people. I mean, a side glance and an internal thought of "wow, she's hot" is one thing compared to some creepy weirdo trying to get up in a woman's space because she looks sexy.

It's a very fine line, I understand that. I have a very kind, gentle guy friend who has expressed sincere confusion about this type of thing. His standpoint is like this: "I'm genuinely interested in what people are reading, because I like books and I work in a library. How can I ask a woman what she's reading on the bus without making her feel like I'm some creep who's trying to hit on her?"

It's complex, for sure. I don't know if there's a right answer for any of it. Body language, really. Some women don't even have to dress provocatively in order to have that type of thing happen, they can just be minding their own business at a bus stop or whatever.

posted January 01, 2014 08:38 PM            

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Originally posted by Ami Anne:
I did not know you were so wild, Ian

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Oh yes. I had my days in college and graduate school. That was a time before I got a little more wise and cleaned up my act. Love and marriage was a good thing for me.

posted January 01, 2014 08:41 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Violets:
You probably have a valid point, to a degree. It's probably far less likely for anyone to be stupid enough to think that a woman who was dressed provocatively actually deserves to be raped, or "asked for it". I don't know if this is so much of an issue now as it used to be in the past.

And you are right, another part of the sl*t walks is about unsolicited "attention" from men if a woman dresses in a way that is considered provocative.

The thing about that is that women *should* be able to dress however they want to without being harassed or bothered by people. I mean, a side glance and an internal thought of "wow, she's hot" is one thing compared to some creepy weirdo trying to get up in a woman's space because she looks sexy.

It's a very fine line, I understand that. I have a very kind, gentle guy friend who has expressed sincere confusion about this type of thing. His standpoint is like this: "I'm genuinely interested in what people are reading, because I like books and I work in a library. How can I ask a woman what she's reading on the bus without making her feel like I'm some creep who's trying to hit on her?"

It's complex, for sure. I don't know if there's a right answer for any of it. Body language, really. Some women don't even have to dress provocatively in order to have that type of thing happen, they can just be minding their own business at a bus stop or whatever.

If someone doesn't give off the vibe that they're trying to make eye contact or engage with a guy, he should probably leave her alone. Or if he tries to engage in a conversation and the replies are brisk and short, leave it at that. I would say the same for a woman who was interested in a guy, honestly.

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posted January 01, 2014 08:47 PM            

If someone doesn't give off the vibe that they're trying to make eye contact or engage with a guy, he should probably leave her alone (regardless of how she's dressed). Or if he tries to engage in a conversation and the replies are brisk and short, leave it at that. I would say the same for a woman who was interested in a guy, honestly. [/B][/QUOTE] that all sounds good in theory but it doesn't always work that way in reality.. Most women are really shy if they don't know you and that can come across as disinterest ..... Body language isn't nearly as telling as most people believe . I propose a better idea.... How about women start doing all the romantic approaches since they think it's so easy how to figure all this stuff out ?

posted January 01, 2014 09:02 PM            

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Originally posted by Violets:
Eh...I'm not claiming to have all the answers to any of it. But it's probably a good thing that it's being talked about, because that's a good step in figuring out how to deal with a changing society.

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posted January 01, 2014 09:14 PM            

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Originally posted by aquaguy91:
I understand that women want what they want but do they have to be so nasty about it? Do they have to call every guy they aren't attracted to who approaches them a creep or give him dirty looks ? Is it all really necessary? Can't they understand that men are humans and not psychics or mind readers?

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This is all in your mind. At least you admit you aren't psychic, so you don't know they are thinking. Unless you follow them around eavesdropping as they remark to their friends about their experience with you (ie "that guy is a creep!") Which would be creepy of you.

posted January 01, 2014 09:21 PM            

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Originally posted by Faith:
This is all in your mind. At least you admit you aren't psychic, so you don't know they are thinking. Unless you follow them around eavesdropping as they remark to their friends about their experience with you. Which would be creepy.

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posted January 01, 2014 09:36 PM            

Once again, all assault and all rape is wrong. I don't care who does it. Likewise, a homeless man in the ghetto of any ethnicity doesn't have any right to break a car window to steal any darn thing, even a dollar to buy food. Crime is crime. No one is above the law in America. Even in a more arcane place like Saudi Arabia, the royalty has just sentenced a prince to death for murder.

posted January 01, 2014 09:41 PM            

But one thing that happened to me while I was walking home from work one night was scary after it happened.
I worked on Broadway (at a normal retail store), and lived close by so always walked home. I was wearing what I normally wore at that time (2002-ish). A black skirt, fishnet stockings, black boots, some sort of blouse or something, and a long-ish jacket. That was a pretty normal thing for people to wear in that neighborhood, and in that city in general. At least it wasn't ABnormal. And Seattle is generally a pretty safe city, in most areas.

I was stopped by three guys who said they were from Dallas (a LONG way from Seattle, both in distance and culture), and they started asking me a bunch of weird questions. I was friendly, though not remotely attracted to any of them. It was Broadway, for Pete's sake. People say and do weird stuff all the time there, it's no big deal.
But it soon became apparent that they had other motives, and as they crowded in on me I actually had to pull out my phone in case I had to call 911.

It all seemed so surreal and absurd to me, because, I mean...it was right on Broadway, with tons of people walking around. I was basically not even taking them seriously at all, and just walked away from them with an "uh...are you joking?" expression.

But about a block away my knees started to shake, and I realized that they had really, really bad intentions.

Where you live and where you're from really does make a difference, I think.