posted August 16, 2016 08:41 AM              

I hear you.
It can be tough, trying to live up to your own expectations of yourself, on top of everyone else's.

All the angst you're feeling..don't beat yourself up about it. It's natural, it's human - you're allowed to feel low and lonely and depressed. Don't reject your feelings. They'll only come back stronger. The best way out is through.

However, even more important than that, I think - is to forgive yourself. And start over like it's day one and you have all the time in the world. I know it's easier said than done. But I used to feel a lot of what you're feeling, the last decade of my life. I wish I'd tried to forgive myself sooner. Even now it's not easy. But, you have to understand - you can't have been any other than what you were. You don't need to be any different than who you are. It's special, and unless you embrace & accept yourself, you won't be freed up to deal with all the s**t the world throws at you.

You're not weak for feeling that way - don't think that! Strength does not mean being uber-confident and happy all the time. It takes real strength to tough it out through these emotional storms and emerge out the other side. You're on the right track, don't let people tell you otherwise.

When we're younger, we're much much more responsive and receptive to stimuli & circumstance. So don't feel so bad over what you couldn't do as a child. Trust that you did your best, you did what you could, given the circumstances and given *you* (your personality, emotional state, etc).

That's all we can do, really. Do our best and let the universe do the rest. So many times, I thought it was "too late" to recover or try some things. But, looking back, it really wasn't. I didn't have faith is all.

posted August 16, 2016 05:46 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by DopGang:
The second guy is ok.

Haven't heard anything about the kid yet. On his Facebook there's a bunch of comments typed in Laotian. So I was trying to read through broken English and poorly translated Laotian.
From what I gathered it seems like he's doing ok but I'm still not sure what happened.

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posted August 16, 2016 06:14 PM              

quote:

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Originally posted by DopGang:
The kid who collapsed in the parking lot has passed away today.
I'm ok but it's shocking. It was so sudden and he wasn't old. Had a wife and young son.

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Awful.
He had a family.

posted August 17, 2016 11:02 AM            

Not doing that AP though really hit hard; 55 AP Calculus Problems I didn't do over the whole summer 😓😧

Not going to do that again lol.

posted August 18, 2016 01:22 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by MillyX:
I just want to get over him already...Getting over someone is like quitting a hard drug. It"s so difficult.

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posted August 19, 2016 07:03 PM            

I sort of have a vent about people who do their best to make you feel unwelcome (not here in this thread), but I don't have it in me to type it out. Been there before, and I'm supposed to be on my way to a movie.

posted August 19, 2016 07:05 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by SirenSong:
I got a phone

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posted August 20, 2016 01:46 PM            

So I thought it went well.

Heh, the other day, I talked to my cousin, and she told me that the guy said that I seemed "nice", but "sounded angry"....etc... (he said a bunch of stuff, none of it described a "nice" person".

The only time I sounded less than happy and giggling and laughing was when my cousin asked about one of the people I worked with last year that didn't turn out so well.

So I thought "WTF, how delicate is this guy?" But I was like, yeah well he was mellow, soft spoken, so it's understandable that he would perceive me that way. So I didn't say anything.

Here's how it went from WTH to major sht: She started talking about how intuitive her guy was, and how he got all that "just from the way you talked" - to quote her words. She went on to talk about how she felt lucky that they shared such a connection, that he "chose" her because she was great and etc...Then proceeded to imply that her relationship was so much greater than mine.

I let her little projection of insecurities slide many times before, but it was getting ridiculous. She's pushing 40, I expected her to act at least better than before. I gave her a good talking to, and a free unsolicited psycho-analysis while I was at it. Btch tried to deny it at first, but later lost for words.

posted August 21, 2016 06:49 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by teasel:
Is that a bad thing?

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posted August 22, 2016 01:26 AM            

When you carry a burden so heavy you get the greatest gift in life. You will be able to help people. Only people who have suffered can understand this as true happiness.

posted August 25, 2016 05:11 AM            

Have a good day, everyone... oh. Wait a minute, this is the vent thread?

posted August 25, 2016 04:27 PM            

I appreciate your Vent Thread... Helps more than you know... Thanks for Creating.

If you DO go into Hermit Mode?, we'll understand. Just be a Safe Hermit, okay?...

posted August 25, 2016 04:36 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by mirage29:
...... edit 9:14am
{just need a better place} sooooomme day.

Have a good day, everyone... oh. Wait a minute, this is the vent thread?

Then, have a Better Day...

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What's up?

If I could, I would give you my email address. I haven't been writing to anyone for the past month or so (except one, just now). I really appreciate your responses to people here, to myself, and just all over the board.